WIR WOLLEN MEER!
The weather has warmed up considerably and it is feeling like Spring, Spring, Spring. Considering I DJaned last night at Search&Destroy @Shwutz till 6am with Bruce “Judy” LaBruce I woke up somewhat early by 11am. I treated myself to a nice breakfast at a lil café on the Haupt Strasse and strolled to the Tiergarten to enjoy the climate temps. Saw an interesting in-bred looking young monster couple taking a walk through the park holding hands.They were like a brother/sister/husband/wife very angular with Frankenstein edges. Dying their hair black and sporting that horrid goth meets The Matrix look didn´t help matters.
Had a phun time behind the mighty wheels of steel last night. I started my set at around 11:15 and got to spin alone till about 12:30 or so. Judy took over around 1:30am and then at about 3am we tagged team. Judy has gotten much better. She uses a computer and that was always a bit problematic but since she DJ´s so much these days---at least 3x a week when in Berlin her skills have improved. Not to say that I am so amazing. I know my limitations.
Judy does date herself with her music choices of classic rock and bands like Steely Dan, and her new mixes of olde stuff don’t help things but it makes it more obvious. She should just play the record the original way and own it. We really did have a nice time together and she is looking much better now that she has stopped doing so many drugs. That Judy LaBruce is still the biggest party nigger I know. She is very Alicia Bridges I Love the Nightlife. I love to DJane, and if I am at a club holding court surrounded by beauties that is divine, but I am not one of those queens just happy to be anywhere. After Judy and I finished our set the Scream Club team of cutie pie, charming baby dykes took ever. I was happy to hightail it and finally get some sleep.
One of the evenings highlights was when I played the theme from the Brazilian Children´s TV show XuXa. That really got the crowd going, and I wasn´t sure it would work. How many of you out there in internet land remember Ms. XuXa Meneghel? She started her career at 16 as a softcore porn actress, hooked up with the famous soccer star Pele and then crossed over into the mainstream. Today she is the richest woman in Brazil with a fortune estimated in the billions. She even dated John F. Kennedy Jr.I would sometimes catch her kiddy TV show when I was in a hotel room and I loved how obvious it was that she hated children. She didn´t exactly try to hide it either which i loved.
Search&Destroy was packed to the rafters in the lounge where we spinned. The German matinee idol Moritz Bleibtreau requested I play Michael Jackson so I played his little known song “It’s the Falling in Love” which soothed him and the crowd. Gorgeous Deutsch blondine male ingénue Max Riemelt asked me to play Whitney Huston. I don´t have any Whitney records so I played her mother Sissy Huston´s disco hit from the 70s “Think it Over”. Thank god I didn’t get any requests for Lady Gaga, but one young girl did ask for Madonna which surprised me. As most young people don´t really know who she is anymore. A hot indie rock looking kid came up to the booth thanking me profusely for playing the Jonathan Fire*Eater song “No Love Like That” he asked me to pose with him and his boyfriend the male supermodel Sean O´pry. If it wasn´t Mr. O´pry it was his doppelganger. Also enjoying the evening: Daniel Hendrickson with my beautiful child of high art Jonathan Berger here in Berlin working on camp/anti-camp, Senol Senturk who is the co-production designer, bubbly Anna Muelter of HAU with her South Afrikan art curator posse, baby diaper Joel Gibb of the Hidden Cameras with Ricardo of Shade Inc. formerly Berlin Hilton, artists Joana Coppi and Katja von Helldorf, Tobias Raucher of Sissy Magazine and his hot barefoot boi club, and my sweet Fight Club theater kids.
In the morning I had a Speaking From the Diaphragm meeting at the cemetery compound of delicious Nanna Heidenreich. Nanna along with handsome Uli Ziemons and my assistant Christian Weber got a lot of work done, and afterwards I was able to enjoy the Springlike weather which was such a treat. Thursday was my super meeting day starting with a Living Archive/Rising Stars, Falling Stars-We Must Have Music brainstorm with Arsenal Empress Stefanie Schulte Strathaus, Markus Ruff and Daniel Hendrickson. Jeffrey Hilbert of the LA based design ad agency Kustom Creative has created a fab poster for my new re-launch of Rising Stars and believe me its out of this world. Jeffrey besides being super sexy and fine with a huge penis is one of the nicest and most talented men I know. He always comes through for his doll.
Then I was off to the HAU for camp/anti-camp meetings with Jonathan, Senol Senturk, Nazli & Yoryos the Greek, Christian Weber and Anna Mülter. One last evening meeting with Christian Weber where we tried to figuring things out for VD is Speaking From the Diaphragm my klatch/installation performance.
I unfortunately had to miss going to see Lydia Lunch at the KW Institute for Contemporay Art in Mitte. The first lady of Harsh, Ms. Lunch was reading from her novel Paradoxia, A Predator´s Diary as part of the exhibition: You Killed Me First:The Cinema of Transgression.
Jonathan Berger arrived in Berlin on Tuesday. Its his first time and I love seeing the city through his eyes. He told me that he had a star sighting on his plane from New York of the famed experimental musician Lamont Young "looking like a Karl Heinz Weinberger foto". Jonathan did the production design for several of my most recent hit projects and is now designing the entire set for camp/anti-camp at HAU 2 in April which will be explosive.
The first event that is part of Camp/Anti-Camp is the film program at the Arsenal Inst. Für film und Video Kunst with a screening of the 1946 Carmen Miranda film Copacabana Monday March 19th at 8pm. The film features 1940s hunk supreme Steve Cochran. Hope to see you all at the screening and you better be bright eyed and bushy tailed.

OB DROHEND DIE WOLKEN AUCH HANGEN
Fans of this very blog in Italy. Below is a very important announcement of an art show with some of my delightfully talented Berlin children:

Dear friends & colleagues,
You are cordially invited to:
AVAILABISM
A group show with works by:
Amelia Bande
Annette Knol
Christo Wallers
Cristian Forte
Drawing Workshop
Francisca Villela
Irene Mattioli & Anna Schmidt
Katja von Helldorff
Mareike Lee
Quinten Dierick
Stefan Endewardt
Tim Greaves

curated by Annette Knol
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Opening: Saturday 17th of March
19:00 - 23:00
Superfluo - Central Park - via Annibale da Bassano 1 - Padova - Italy
For further information: http://www.superfluoproject.org/
--------------------------------------------------------
Availabism means to make best use of what is and was available; to take what is closest at hand as both the inspiration for your work as well as the medium. It was coined as an artistic movement by Kembra Pfahler from the Voluptuous Horror of Karen Black and has a past going back as far as the Dada-ists.
I first heard the word Availabism during a workshop led by Vaginal Davis and something inside of me clicked: this is what I had been doing all along. I was delighted to find a word that described a way of working based on improvising, responding to a certain environment, creating from what is already there. Availabism is a sort of left-over dish approach to making art: the deliciousness comes from a simple idea combined with a strong sense of intuition. The result goes beyond the material bringing the artist closer to a spiritual relationship with the work. Art making becomes part of everyday life, coming down from the out of reach pedestal it often stands on.
When preparing for this exhibition, it became clear how extremely difficult it is to sum up what exactly Availabism is. Can anyone who uses lo-fi or found materials be a follower? Does your work have to be process-based?
AVAILABISM is a group show exploring the philosophy of Availabism, which simultaneously brings together a group of artists affiliated with the Kotti-Shop, an independent multi-faceted arts-space in Berlin.
Annette Knol, Berlin 2012.
***
And this announcement sent to me by Jan Klesse straight from the mouth of world famous Goddess Bunny
"I want you all to know I AM CHANGING BACK TO WHO I WAS BORN AS JOHN
EDWARD BAIMA I HAVE SEEN THE LIGHT. JESUS DOSEN’T WANT ME TO BE A
WOMAN"

Lets see how long this lasts and if it puts a cramp in Goddess Bunny’s business venture of teaching a master class of singing, acting, dancing and comedy from the cramped environ of her nursing home in Inglewood, California.

GOD IS JUST A BIGGER ELVIS
Received two sweet missives to-day, that I shall call A Tale of Two Cities--- Los Angeles and London.

My Sweet Negra Apestosa,

I'm waiting for my Boo at the gym. The usual characters at 6am!

All the young Hotties are now working Cross Fit into their routines. The cool
thing about Cross Fit is that shorter Shorts are ideal for all the Squatting and jumping. Today, there was a new beauty at the gym doing his Cross Fit routine. He had a very short Buzz Cut with such a pretty face and a delicious Butt!
I had a busy weekend cooking both Sat and Sunday. My family has been circling
my Aunt Dora at the hospital, she is preparing for her exit at a nice ripe age of 89. My Aunt Dora was part of the Sleepy Lagoon Pachuca crew. Lots of drama at the hospital with her children, the boxing gloves came out and the Hospital decided to discharge my Aunt partly cuz of the family drama. They pissed off the Social Worker with their Drama.

I've not seen anyone these days. The weather has been Nice.

I miss my Sweet Doll.

Have u been in touch with Emi Fontana of West of Rome?
***
Oh Doll,
forget about Gaydar, Recon, Gay Romeo or Does Your Mom Know You're a Puff.com, I am having a blast using the local Craigslist here, where you can find a fair number of bi or closeted people instead of the usual tired gay mummies, Nosferatus and Nosferitas. Here is what I have been doing in the last couple of weeks, when I was not doing job hunting.
On Sunday 26, I went to a small group orgy from 3pm to 1am. There has been a
number of people coming and going, for a total of 10 or so. It was obviously a mixed bag, so I skipped the older ones there and I have concentrated on a cute 23yo student that was there. We only did lesbiana because he was passive but not into anal and, as you know, I am very much like that old Maggie Thatcher's quote 'The lady's not for turning'. We chilled out a bit then and later around 8pm a gorgeous 24yo Polish guy came by. Scalpelled cheekbones, natural muscular body and all the trimmings... he really looked like a model and we all said that to him. Obviously, I went all over him like a vulture, just like you the Doll when you see any sort of food, and me and another guy ended up double penetrating him.
On Monday 27, I had a married with kids guy in his early 30s that came to my flat for some facefucking and some fingering.
On Wed 29, some other bi guy in his late 20s came along for some spanking.
On Saturday the 3rd a 32yo rugby built married guy came around in the afternoon for some electro and sucking, then later in the early evening I went to a hotel room to fist two flight attendants from Tennessee.
I had a couple of days off then on Tuesday the 6th another married 32yo guy visited my pad for servicing my schlongy organ of delightful pleasures and some OTK spanking.
On Thursday the 8th, another young bi guy for electro... they all seem to want electro these days!
On Friday the 9th, I have treated a 23yo bi again to some electro and fucking. He was a bit tight, probably his girlfriend doesn't like to play with his young firm butt... shame on her.
On Saturday the 10th, I went to my first ballbusting party and spent a happy couple of hours slapping, pulling, hitting etc the manly balls of the small number of people there.
On Sunday the 11th, I replied to an ad of someone very local, just a 20 min walk. He was a student, whose flatmate was blindfolded and naked on bed waiting for people to come around to fuck him, so I popped in and I was sucked a bit before fucking his bubble butt. He was a gorgeous 23yo young ginger and you know how much I like them. I attached a couple of pics of him - front and back - they were sent to me before the meeting, so that you can pleasure your penile cashew a bit.
I haven't anything planned this week, apart from a Clothed Male/Naked Male party on Saturday, but I am sure that something will come up.
I will keep you posted.
***
Went to the opening of feminist art gallery Alpha Nova Werkstaff & Galerie Futura at the new space at Kunst Fabrik am Flutgraben in Kruezberg with Katja von Helldorf and her hot gal posse. It was a full devil moon just perfect for Druid Wiccan sorcering and prancing about naked in the forest----blessed be. My former students at Weissensee Art Academy were all part of the exhibition including Sweet Annette Knol who was with her smoking hot South American girlfriend Amelie, Lydia Hamann, Katja and her Leiseylento bandmate Cristian Forte. The vivacious Anne Kuhl is one of the artistic directors of this new space, which was packed to and beyond the rafters. I loved the messy graduate student feel of the proceedings with everything shown in a haphazard like fashion. I would not have used standard gallery bright lighting and made things more moody and mysterious. Openings are not really for seeing the art work on display. Of course being a giantessa I was constantly bumping my head into one stretched nylon assemblage. Now that’s how your form a relationship to art. Katja’s colored drawings are so very expressive and beguiling as if stolen from an ancient cave or rescued from a book of monk etchings you’d find in a monastery like in that Sean Connery film In the Name of the Rose. Annette’s super post modernist and I might add brilliant feminist lineage plates were also a highlight. I was feeling a little claustrophobic as it was so crowded and there was no place to sit, so I had to take my swollen feet back home to the Insel missing the performance.
The next evening I went to Anna Muelter of Hebbel am Ufer’s 16th birthday party at Barbie Deinhoff. It was a joyous affair that included Senol Senturk, Katja from Piss Gottin, kJohnny Blue, Susanna Sachsse, Marc Siegel, Daniel Hendrickson, Stefanie Schulte Strathaus, Olga Damnitz, Uli Ziemons and his beautiful girlfriend with appearances by Angela Melitoupolous, Nanna Heidenreich, Elsa the Portugeuse intermedia actress, Katrin Dod, Koen Clarehout, Meijke Hansen and DJane Bianca Kruk behind the mighty wheels of steel. Earlier in the eve I had a camp/anti-camp dinner meeting with Susi and Marcu that was fun filled with lots of laughter and gaiety, but also hard work and prep. In fact it was an entire day of meetings. My first was in the morning with my co-host for Vaginal Davis is Speaking From the Diaphragm Nanna Heidenreich, who prepared a delish breakfast as we made plans and basically had a girlish gaggle of a time. Met Nanna’s mom who is turning 88 years of age but doesn’t look a day over 60, she is so energetic and youthful. I can see where Nanna got her good genes from.
Sunday morning I met with Daniel Hendrickson and we worked on some Rising Stars, Falling Stars re-launch duties after a robust breakfast at a Neu Koelln Turkish boite. At 4pm I joined the Noisy Rooms rehearsal studio shenanigans with Tenderloin who seem to be gelling quite well. After rehearsal the boys and 19 year old lead singer Dagmar Hofpfisterei retreated for some non spicy Indian food in Friedrichshain. Landgraf Jan Klesse followed his doll back to the Cheese Endique Trifecta where he kept me up all night reading steamy passages from a new book about John Lennon’s love affair with his manager Brian Epstein where Lennon held Epstein in a chokehold and proceeded to ram up his arse mechanical fantastical. Talk about your hard days night.
In the morning Jan and I joined sweetie pie Manuel Schubert for a breakfast radio interview from Toughstein Cafe for Film Highlights Magazine. It was my day of press-O-matic as I also finished an e-interview with ExBerliner Magazine and was interviewed at the Trifecta by Ines Meier for the German edition of Art Info Magazine. I am also sadly behind in the essay that I am supposed to write for Art Forum on the late, great rock haunt Jabberjaw that thrived in LA’s Funkytown of South Central in the early 1990s.
Tomorrow Jonathan Berger arrives in Berlin. Jonathan will be doing the production design for camp/anti-camp, and I can’t wait to cover him in pithy kisses. During breakfast at Toughstein Café a song by Gwen Stefanie and her band No Doubt was played over the loud speaker. I was asked if I knew Ms. Stefanie which brought back memories of her and the band in the late 80s when they played the mod/ska/funk/soul circuit opening up for two better bands Momma Stud and Section Eight. If anyone knows whatever happened to the kids in these bands please holler at me with the details. Section Eight were a bunch of very cute kids who use to hang out at Retail Slut on Melrose with my Afro Sister Clitoris Turner aka: Mark Maxwell. Mark is a dinge queen and had a crush on one of the boys in the band who was somewhat of a nerdy Negro who wore wire frame glasses if I am remembering correctly. Momma Stud featured two girl back-up singers and one of them Laura E., was having a Lesbian affair with Fertile La Toyah Jackson photog Beulah Love. One time Laura joined the Afro Sisters in performance at UC Santa Barbara and beat the living excrement out of a drunken co-ed who threw a drink at her. Laura was a feisty fiery Latina with a shapelier buttocks then J-Lo. The last thing I heard about her was that she was being kept in elegant style by actor Eddie Murphy in the early to mid 90s between his conjugal visitations with various pre-op transsexuals who hung out at the Santa Monica Blvd club Some R,Some aRn’t at Peanuts Disco. Laura came clean to Eddie that she had herpes and he vamoosed taking back the credit cards, fancy car and Sunset Tower rendezvous pad.Shortly after that Laura wound up preggers by some dude, and was working as a receptionist for Jiffy Lube in the suburbs.

EIN DILDO FUER DIONYSUS
Thanks to Jan Klesse of the hot new art band Tenderloin for restoring my computer to active status. It seems to be working again after crashing during the first few days of the Berlinale film festival. Lets hope that it doesn’t present me with any more problems. I need access to the laptop to work on camp/anti-camp festival and the re-vamping of Rising Stars, Falling Stars and a bunch of other projects.
After the first few days of the Berlinale International film festival I wrote a few comments that have languished in my draft folder. So happy that now I can post them for your perusal, sorry for the long delay:
Early to rise for 9am press screening at the Berlinale Palast of the lyrical French film Aujourd’hui by Alain Gomis which features a sad, poker faced Seneglese man (played by American Saul Williams)in a poetic meditation filled with vibrantly moody naturalistic Vicente Minnelli-esque set pieces. It’s like a musical without the music. After this screening I cruised about the Potsdamer Platz playa with my constant companion the baby diaper of the Hidden Cameras Joel Gibb.
We then went to see a Panorama pic called Keep the Lights On(which won a Teddy Award) directed by Ira Sachs which I left halfway through right after the dull couple in the film played by Dane Thure Lindhart and Zachary Booth had a love scene which featured a not very convincing depiction of a mudslide. The best part of the film was the Arthur Russell score. I felt sorry for poor Julianne Nicholsen of Ally McBeal fame, she deserves three cookies for giving her all in a badly underdeveloped supporting role. While in the accreditation line I ran into sweet Shannon Kelly who use to be with Outfest and now is working at UCLA in their public programming department at the Melnitz Theatre. Shannon is at the Berlinale this year on the Teddy Awards committee and its great seeing him looking as handsome as ever. Few people know that Shannon is quite a song bird. He performed years ago at my club Bricktops at the Parlour for St.Paddy’s Day and tore the house down singing Irish songs and sea shantys.
Had a wonderful Tenderloin rehearsal yesterday at Noisy Rooms off of Warschauer Strasse. Afterwards Jan, Felix and I grabbed some grub at this Indian Restaurant in Friedrichshein that had really cheap cocktails. The night before we went to see baby diaper Joel Gibb of the Hidden Cameras DJ at London Calling at the Schwuz along with fellow Canuck Dickey Doo. Had a nice time hanging out with the North Americans but the cigarette smoke in the club was killing me. Early in the evening had a Tenderloin dinner meeting at the Mexican Restaurant Santa Maria with Felix, Joel and Jan to discuss Tenderloin performing as part of camp/anti-camp in April. Jan has been my houseguest for the last couple of days and its been heaven having a lovely young man around the house. Besides fixing my computer he put up some shelves for me and did a lot of things that only a man or hot butch wo-man can handle. I am completely helpless when it comes to using any kind of tool or technology.
***
Here is a little funny email i received from the states that i think you will enjoy:

I'm at the Starbucks in Weho reading a manual/photo guide. I have almost 3 hrs
to kill. I didn't want to drive to the east side only to drive back to the west
side.
So I'm reading and monkey-ing around with my camera, testing different light
settings. Nobody was sitting next to me, I had my coffee and my Don't Fuck with
Me ear plugs and Poker face on! Deadly combo for Weho.

This lil Chinese dude walks up to me and sits on the chair next to me. He says.
I Fashion Molel... And he strikes a pose. I break my poker face and I smile, as
I decipher Model from Molel.

He says, U visitor, I say Yes, from Lago de Plata! He says, Oh I luve Espana...

He had a hot lil body. He put his hand on my leg and says. U Top? I don't
reply, he says, Me Bollum! His next sentence. I live up street, let's have fun.
I was expecting, Me luv U long Time.

He put my book in my backpack and says, Follow me. He stands and I see all
65lbs of him. He had a Que Cute lil Butt and a cute face. Like a Fucken stray
dog, I follow this lil dude to one of them expensive Weho apts.

He immediately gets on his knees and starts to suck me. I have never been with
an Asian dude. He sucks me for about a minute or so and is ready to be Fucked,
right there on the floor. Doggy Style, I figure out the position as he's on all
fours, getting lubed and pulling condoms out from under the Couch. I put the
rubber on and feel this SMOOTH lil Butt and tiny lil hole. He says, Oh Bick
Cock! Yeah. (That doesn't work for me, although at that moment I understood
them Goofy white boys with Asian GF or BF's. Ur right, them small bodies make ur
Cock look like a Fucken Cock-a-Sorous! I felt like I was going to split this
Fucker in half. We start Doggy style, he's making a fuss, we change to him
sitting on me with his back facing my face. My preferred position. He is going
to town, his hole had this ass sucking Muscle that I have never experienced. I
didn't know what was happening, it was like a mouth in his hole Sucking my dick.
He rode me for a while and then I took over. He says, Stop, oh so good. I
turn. So now he's facing me, and he's riding my dick squating on me like an old
Chinese Grandma. His face was no longer cute, I then get a margarette Cho
vision of her strained faces. This boy was going to town, now he's loud, I
don't understand him. He says. Cum. Cum. And he cums on my chest, he had a
mighty lil Dick.

He says, touch me. I had only been touching, spreading and manhandling his hot
lil Ass. I didn't touch him. He finished, I told him to get on his side. He
did. I fucked him as he was sideways, he said, oh no mo. I said, I need to
finish, I pinned his lil body down and went at it until I unloaded, he unloaded
again, this time without his hands, as I was holding on to his arm.

I got up, he took off the rubber and I changed. He said, Oh how often u visit
from Pain? (Spain) I said every once in a while. He gave me his card, number,
email, twiller account-I told him I didn't Twitter, and every possible way for
me to contact him.

So I left with a new found respect for them Hot lil Asian men. I believe he was
Chinese.

Warrior

GERBILS ARE THE FUTURE OF MAN
That sweet Jewish Muslim Champion for Christ Jesus Daniel Hendrickson took me to a nice birthday breakfast at this cute Turkish café on the Hauptstrasse across from Oz Gida supermarket. The food was fine but our waiter was one of the most fugliest men I have ever seen. He looked like a Turkish version of Max Shreck of Nosferatu fame. I have seen many German Nosferatu but never a Turkish one. Scary.
Later in the evening Marc Siegel, Susanne Sachsse and Judy LaBruce took me for a fab birthday dinner at Azul in Kreuzberg. This restaurant is one of my fav´s and I scarfed down their tasty lamb cutlets which are superb. I never stop working my birthday which I drag out for an entire month. I am shameless!
It was great catching up with Judy LaBruce. She had a million fascinating stories to tell us about her trip to Cuba with her big dicked Afro Cuban husband and scandals in Madrid Spain with her new photography exhibition Obscenity at the LA Fresh Gallery. Not only was Judy condemned by Catholic groups but the fascist Franco Foundation was also looking for LaBrucian blood. In short everyone in Spain hates Bruce “Judy” LaBruce. She is slowly becoming the most despised wo-man on the planet, and the most controversial. All the major media in Europe is up in arms and the internet viralocity has made BLAB the top keyword. Judy was looking fit and trim though she caught a bit of a cold from a Bulgarian concubine she hired. Our Lady Judy of the Mariposa will be in Berlin for two months working on several high octane projects that she is trying to keep under wraps and will be participating in the upcoming camp/anti-camp festival Queer Guide to Everday Life at HAU 2 April 19-2st. If you are interested in BLAB product two finger rings in solid sterling silver and solid sterling silver goldplated are available in limited edition of 100 copies worldwide by European Jewelier to the shtars Jonathan Johnson. Contact him at www.Jonathan-B-Johnson.com or www.brucelabruce.com
Special thanks to writer Travis Jeppeson who connected me with the young, vivacious Portuguese film programmer Pedro Marum of Queer Lisbon Festival and his very cute lesbian husband Rita who I met with at WAU Café the other day to talk about my coming to their youthquaker film festival. Its very smart of this festival to give it over to a youthful contingent who will have fresh ideas and exuberant energy. Other Queer festivals should take heed if they want to remain relevant.
Travis Jeppesen who is also a regular writer to Art Forum Magazine will have a new novel coming out in 2013 called The Suiciders released on the Semiotext(e) imprint which all of his many fans will certainly be anticipating. Travis will most likely read from this new novel when he makes an appearance on my Speaking From the Diaphragm talkshow installation in April at HAU 2 that is part of camp/anti-camp.
Some literary kibbels I just heard on the grapevine: That hot hunky dark haired Jewish writer Nathan Englander(What We Talk About When We Talk About Anne Frank) is having a delicious same sex love affair with Muslim writer Wael Ghonim. I love it when heterosexual men break out of middleclassism and experiment with homosexuality. I am all down for that!
Of course I´m not one to gossip so you know you didn´t hear this from me.
***
I just finished reading the Scotty Bowers book Full Service and it’s a scandalous hoot. 89 year old Mr. Bowers seems to have had sex with almost every golden era Hollywood star including Vivien Leigh who he sez was great in the sack. He also procured kinky sex dates for Charles Laughton who was a scat queen who enjoyed excremental peanut butter sandwiches and Tyrone Power who savored a train of studluddites golden showering on him. My favorite pronouncement of his was that James Dean was a prissy little queen, moody and unpredictable.
Of course I believe everything he wrote. Its too outrageous to be made up plus it has the Gore Vidal seal of approval.
The other book I am enjoying is Kippenberger-The Artist and His Families by his sister Susanne Kippenberger. I had met the handsome German artist many years ago when he managed the punk club SO36 which is still a popular hot spot in Berlin.

Here is the latest project from one of my hot young German kollegues:
please scroll down for English °°
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Liebe Kolleg_innen, liebe Freund_innen,

wir laden Sie und Euch herzlich ein zur Wiedereröffnung von alpha nova kulturwerkstatt & galerie futura in den neuen Räumlichkeiten in der Kunstfabrik am Flutgraben und der Vernissage zur Ausstellung „Von Rosen, Nelken, Netzen – Künstlerische Statements zum Weltfrauentag“.

Am 08. März 2012 ab 19:30 Uhr
Vernissage, Performance mit Sara Ka Ka, Musik mit turbo diesel & egotrya
alpha nova kulturwerkstatt & galerie futura, Am Flutgraben (Kunstfabrik), 12453 Berlin (U1 Schlesisches Tor)

Wir freuen uns auf Ihr und Euer zahlreiches Erscheinen.
Mit besten Grüßen,

Katharina Koch und Anne Kohl
Künstlerische Leitung alpha nova kulturwerkstatt & galerie futura

www.alpha-nova-kulturwerkstatt.de

alpha nova-kulturwerkstatt & galerie futura ist ein Ausstellungs- und Veranstaltungsort in Berlin, der unter einer genderkritischen Perspektive an den Schnittstellen von Kunst, Wissenschaft und politischer Praxis arbeitet.

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Ausstellung: Von Rosen, Nelken, Netzen
Künstlerische Statements zum Weltfrauentag

Installation – Poetische Objekte – Zeichnung – Video – Foto – Sound

Künstler_innen: Birgit Cauer, Cristian Forte, Lydia Hamann/Kaj Osteroth, Sandra Haselsteiner, Katja von Helldorf, Bettina Hohorst/Tina Kiel/Mayan Printz, Roland Ibold, Annette Knol, Monika Ortmann

Rosen symbolisieren nicht nur Liebe, sondern stehen auch als Symbol für die Kämpfe streikender Textilarbeiterinnen zu Beginn des 20 Jh., die die Anfänge der Frauenbewegung markieren. Nelken wurden zum Sinnbild der „gelösten Frauenfrage“ in der DDR. Netze können zukunftsweisend sein, um aus der Differenz verschiedener Lebensentwürfe heraus gemeinsam Forderungen zu artikulieren und emanzipative Kräfte zu bündeln gegen Ungleichheitsverhältnisse und für ein selbstbestimmtes Leben aller. Dies sind nur einige Facetten des Nachdenkens über den Weltfrauentag, der auch die Frage aufwirft: Wer ist eigentlich das Subjekt des 8. März? galerie futura schließt sich der Diskussion über die Wiederaneignung des Tages an und fragt darin nach den Potentialen der Kunst. In Installationen, Objekten, Zeichnungen, Foto, Video und in Interviews setzen sich die Künstler_innen auf kritische, ernste, ironische, lustvolle, verspielte und bisweilen kämpferische Weise mit der heutigen Bedeutung des Weltfrauentags auseinander.

Künstlerische Leitung / Kuratorinnen: Anne Kohl, Katharina Koch

Ausstellung: 9. März – 20. April 2012, Mi.-Sa. 16-19 Uhr

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Dear friends and colleagues,

we cordially invite you to the re-opening of alpha nova kulturwerkstatt & galerie futura in the new space at Kunstfabrik am Flutgraben and to the opening of the exhibition „Von Rosen, Nelken, Netzen – Künstlerische Statements zum Weltfrauentag“ ("Of roses, carnations, and networks - Artistic statements on International Women's Day").

March 8th, 2012, from 7.30 P.M.
Opening, Performance with Sara Ka Ka, Music with turbo diesel & egotrya
alpha nova kulturwerkstatt & galerie futura, Am Flutgraben (Kunstfabrik), 12453 Berlin (U1 Schlesisches Tor)

We are looking forward to seeing you at the openings.
With best regards,

Katharina Koch und Anne Kohl
Artistic Directors alpha nova kulturwerkstatt & galerie futura

www.alpha-nova-kulturwerkstatt.de

alpha nova-kulturwerkstatt & galerie futura is a Berlin-based art space for exhibitions and cultural events which promotes the interaction of artistic, theoretical and political practices with an explicit gender-critical perspective.

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And the great Franko b will have a showcase for his new project Because of Love April 24, 2012 at the Laban Theatre in London. For more information and to reserve a ticket please contact Richard Oyarzabal at richard.oyarzabal@btinternet.com www.franko-b.com

***
Joel sent me this newsreport. I didnt believe him about it at first, but now i do:

MAN DISMEMBERED AND COOKED AFTER SEX GAMES
The dismembered, partially cooked corpse of a missing man has been found in a Berlin apartment, where prosecutors believe he was killed after a sex game spiralled out of control.
• Early flowers greet spring (27 Feb 12)
• Balaclava-clad child killer jailed for life (27 Feb 12)
• Giving sausage a face (26 Feb 12)
The BZ daily reported on Wednesday that the deceased, Carsten Srock, was found with his limbs expertly carved off with either an axe or large knife. The body pieces were then wrapped fastidiously in plastic bags and cling-wrap, and left to sit in the two-room flat for around three weeks.

His head was found, partially cooked, by the police.

Prosecutors on the case told the BZ they believe the victim was “murdered for sexual pleasure.”

Owner of the Mariendorf apartment is a 43-year-old man identified as Michael S., who was rescued by paramedics after trying to take his own life. The unemployed Berliner attempted to open a main vein, before calling the emergency services minutes after.

It was only upon the arrival of the paramedics that the gruesome truth began to come to light. The paramedics contacted the police, who arrived at the scene to find not only Michael S. bathed in blood, but the body parts of his occasional sexual partner Srock, dotted around the residence.

“Officials questioned the man in hospital,” a spokesman for the state prosecutors told the paper. During questioning Michael S. reportedly admitted to the murder. An warrant for his arrest was issued on Tuesday.

Srock was reported missing by his partner January 2. According to the gay news portal queer.de the bank manager, who reportedly worked part-time at a Berlin gay sauna called "Boiler", finished his shift behind the bar on the evening of New Years Day.

He then took out a large sum of money from a nearby cash point possibly to help Michael S. pay off debts, or to exchange for sex, reported the BZ.

Srock then rang his partner to say that he had other arrangements and would not be returning home that night. The next day, his phone had been turned off.

“It did not take long for us to narrow the search down to the 43-year-old Michael S.,” a police spokesman told Die Welt newspaper. He also added that investigators had discovered that the pair had apparently agreed to partake in sex games beforehand.

An autopsy later confirmed that the two men had taken part in sexual activity together shortly before the murder. Exact time of death remains, however, unclear.

Berlin's gay community has been rocked by the revelations, which have sparked condolences on internet forums for the 37-year-old victim.

The gruesome incident is reminiscent of the murder committed in 2001 by Armin Meiwes, dubbed the "Cannibal from Rotenburg" for castrating, butchering and eating a man. After meeting a 43-year-old engineer from Berlin online, Meiwes and his victim agreed to the killing and cannibalism.

The Local/jcw

Update on Don Cornelius of Soul Train:

When i reported that my friend Doug Gordon who lives in Thailand now went to high school with a woman who was the lover of Don Cornelius i got the info a little mixed up. Doug´s friend is named Victoria Avila and her relationship with Don Cornelius took place for many years over 20 years ago. The mainstream newsmedia also falsely reported that he was going through a bitter divorce with Victoria Avila, but as usual newssources got their facts wrong because his ex-wife a blonde European woman is also named Victoria. Victoria Avila is a beautiful dark haired Latina. Doug tells me that Don Cornelius called Ms. Avila "Big Vic" and that she was deeply in love with at one time.

Had a nice visit with Baby Diaper Joel Gibb to talk about Tenderloin at his Rix Dorf compound. The Diaper gave me a beautiful winter shirt for my belated birthday.
With Muslim champion Daniel Hendrickson I had a meeting with Empress Stefanie Schulte Strathaus about the Rising Stars, Falling Stars Re-Launch in April. It was a very productive meeting. Starting April 22nd is the debut of Rising Stars, Falling Stars-We Must Have Music which will shift the focus of the films i screen from silent to sound and music. After four years of exploring the Arsenal silent and early cinema archive it was high time to shake things up a bit. Of course we will still throw in a silent film with live musical accompanyment here and there. As part of camp/anti-camp we will screen the Nazimova silent of Oscar Wilde´s Salome on March 23rd at 8pm with live musical accompanyment by Tim &kJohnny Blue.
After our Rising Stars meeting, Stefanie and Uli surprised me with a little champagne birthday toast and showered me with juicy presents. It really was a festive little spur of the moment party that included a Poloroid camera, Olga Damnitz and Nanna Heidenreich.
Later in that same evening i took Little Alex of Macedonia to Yumcha Heroes in Mitte for his belated birthday and he gave me a cute little sketch book for mine. We were joined by his hot lover Asaf Hochman for a robust night of girlish klatch.

DON'T EAT PUSSY OFF THE SIDEWALK
Got this cute emug from Mark Simon of The Boyfriend who use to perform regularly at Bricktops in Los Angeles. That Mark is someone very special who i love.


Dear Dr. Davis, I can't remember if I sent you a note about how MAGICAL you were at your Bullocks event. YOU WERE. Once again
you captured every imagination in the room. From the instant you materialized behind the glass door... until THE END flashed on the screen,we were yours. Your timing is flawless,I hope you know. Bea Lillie, beware!
You also now join the ranks of Nora Bayes, Jack Norworth, Grace La Rue??, Ina Claire, Lauritz Melchoir, Eleanor Steber and Lawrence Tibbet, in having the wisdom to allow Elsa Maxwell to toss a small silver coin into the mighty roaring river of your talent. You did not put a foot wrong. Thanks too for getting us a few comps, we were glad to spring for a couple more. xoxoxoxox Mark

PS Just for the hell of it I'm including some pictures of your spawn theboyfriend.

here is the bio we use

In 2003 The Boyfriend sprang fully blown from the hip of *Vaginal Davis, on a Friday night, on top of the bar at Bricktops Speakeasy. We approach our songs from around the corner. We hope to see you there.

Having a wonderful birthday runaway with the Camel. The other day he took me to the Hawley Arms in Camden Town which was the late Amy Winehouse's favorite watering hole. It was very straight and trendy playing 60s soul and hulabaloo. There were some cute boys in their twenties and some basic British Dolly Birds. We also stopped by The Bar Fly, The Lock Tavern and The Monarch. These are some famous live music pubs that discovered groups like Coldplay. All these pubs are located in Camden Town in walking distance from Love Camel's flat. Camel took me to eat at Porchetta which is across the street from the famous Round House near Chalk Farm. I ate a delicious Porcini Risotto with a rucula salad.
I noticed walking the biways of London that the latest street look is an odd mix of Bozo the Clown/Hobo Kelly with plushy/furry cumstained seperates.
Love Camel gave me a wonderful book that i cant wait to read called Full Service by Scotty Bowers with Lionel Freiedberg its the true archive story of a handsome young former marine and gas station attendent who was the concubine and procurer to many golden era Hollywood Stars both male and female.
Now we are off for a birthday Brunch at Mexican boite Cafe Pacifico Cantina then will go to Tate Modern to see the Yayoi Kusama retrospective, thankx to the wonderful Stuart Comer.
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Back in Berlin from my wonderous birthday stay in London. Thanks to Love Camel, Stuart Comer of Tate Modern for the comp tickets to the fab Yayoi Kusama Exhibition and a delish catalogue. Ms. Kusama is one of my alltime favorite artists as she is as crazy if not more so then i am. In the 1970s she had herself committed to a mental institution and she only comes out periodically to attend her international art openings. Also kissy kisstata to big daddy Ron Athey, Franko B., Lee Adams and Lydia Lunch. The weather in London was divine. I loved eating at the Kentish Town Cantina a few doors down from Love Camel´s flat. And what can I say about those gorgeous peaches & cream complexioned London boys that drive me crazy with desire especially a tall Irish ginger haired 23 year old lad named Ronan who is an Olympic Swimmer with a body you can build a dream on.

Just got this update to who was at the Forum Party at the Volksbuhne last week:

Mickey the delightful boyfriend of beautiful Dorothee Wenner, who is like the German Glen Meadmore in that he drives stars for a living. Wynn and Sally chamberlain and their son. Tom Kalin, director of Swoon, with Rose Troche from Go Fish fame, talking heatedly with the Chamberlains about their encounters with Frank O'hara. Birgit Hein, some boring film academics.Stefan Drößler the head of the film museum munich who is bringing out the w+b hein dvd this year! Ewa Szablowska, stylishly lovely Polish Jewish programmer from Wroclaw who co-curated Jack Smith Retro and invited Mario Montez last summer. Britt, the dear friend of Achmed Bürger, who runs a casting agency and is interested in promoting the acting career of Miss Vicky, Richard Gershe´s sweet and pretty girlfriend,Ulrike Ottinger,
Karola Gramann and Heide Schlüpmann,Angelina Jolie in sunglasses and a hickey on her upper neck given by Jenny Shimizu and Stephan Geene, the affable b books leader.
***
Got a lot of email from people asking me why I haven´t commented on Whitney Houston´s death. Well I was never a big fan of her music. I was one of the first writers to comment on Whitney as a lesbian way back in the 1980s, when people were telling me that I was crazy and just making things up. I always wind up proving the naysayers wrong. My performance art musical group The Afro Sisters even had a song called “We´re Lesbians” that featured the lyrics:

Florence Henderson . . . Wesson –ality
Lauren Hutton got that gap between her teeth
Whitney from Houston likes to be underneath

One thing I did forget to mention was the death of Soul Train host Don Cornelius who committed suicide at age 75. Don Cornelius was living with a woman who went to high school in Whittier California with my good friend Doug Gordon who use to design the covers of Fertile La Toyah Jackson Magazine. Doug now lives in Thailand and I just emailed him to get his take on Cornelius´suicide so I will report what he sez as soon as I hear from him. I grew up watching the dancing on Soul Train, and some kids I knew from LA High School were Soul Train regulars. A lot of the black guys dancing on the program were queens who were regulars at the Catch One Disco on Pico Blvd in funkytown.

Now I have to go into overdrive prepping for the new art festival at HAU 2 curated by Susanne Sachsse and Marc Siegel called camp/anti-camp A Guide to Everyday Life which will open happens April 19-21st.

LADY IN VERMIN
The Vagimule doll left Berlin with Love Camel Friday morning for London. The Camel was treating her doll to a whirlwind English birthday. We had to wake up pretty early to catch our flight from Schonefeld Airport. Not my fav aeroport to be sure. Was freaking out that the aeroport was going on strike, but that was happening in Frankfurt not Berlin as of yet. Also heard that the bus and subways would go on strike on Saturday.
The night before we were at the famed Forum Party at the Volksbuhne which was fun and laugh filled. Drank too much and made a fool out of myself because i had stupidly skipped dinner to make a screening of the Taiwanese film Love that was shown at Kino International and featured an attractive young Chinese cast. The men in the film had me all achy breaky for sticky rice. Yowza. In fact the best looking men this year at the festival were in the films, not much eye candy circulating about at screenings.
Got to flirt and kissy kiss with handsome Uli Ziemons, lovely Arsenal Empress Stefanie Schulte Strathaus, Nanna Heidenreich & Olga Damnitz, CHEAP fearless leader Susanne Sachsse & Marc Siegel, Daniel Hendrickson, Nazli Kilerci & Greek Yorgos, kJohnny Blue, Superstar Mario Montez and lover Dave, Wilhelm Hein & Annette Frick, Aijoja & Marianne of bbooks, Little Alex and Tim of Chocolate Grinder, socially promiscuous BFF Darryl "Horacio" Els, Shannon Kelly of UCLA Film Archive with pals from Mix Brazil, stylish and sophisticated Dorthea Wenner, Weiland Speck, Koen Claerhout and a bunch of others that i will report on when i get the official guest list.
Love Camel lives in Kentish Town near Camden area of London in a cute split level flat that is spacious with a balcony and a fab view. Big Daddy Ron Athey cooked me a delicious pre birthday dinner at his lovely sublet on Caledonia Road. Visiting him from Barcelona the first lady of harsh that gorgeous, talented creature known to the world as Lydia Lunch. The no wave starina shared with us some of her new hit songs from her upcoming album that will be released in May and believe me this new material is explosive! Just like the fiery lady Lydia herself. She also let us sneak peak her new videos that will feature in upcoming live performances at film & music festivals. Ms. Lunch will be doing a spoken word performance at the Kunst Werker in Berlin in March. I will post a full update on her and Franko B when i get back to Berlin. Also at the intimate soiree besides Franko was Love Camel and sweet Lee Adams who gave me a birthday present of Derek Jarman's Super 8 book.
Before going to Ron's Love Camel took me for a luncheon at this little American style place called The Diner on Camden High Street and then we had a drink at this gay pub called The Black Cap that turns into a disco after the pub closes where they have low rent drag shows. In the morning Camel treated the Doll to a Polish greasy spoon breakfast at this tiny boite called Mama Mia that had some hunky pale skinned skally lads inside who were turning me on like you wouldn't believe.
Been having a wonderous time with crazy Camel. He showed me the film The Score directed by Radley Metzger from 1974 starring Casey Donavan. I had seen the other Metzger film The Lickerish Quarter which is completely insane. I think i should have Jonathan Berger use the film Lickerish Quartet as inspiration for our Speaking From the Diaphragm set when i recreate the talkshow installation in Berlin. Camel also showed me a little known Italian movie called Cosotto from 1977 starring a very young Jodie Foster and a cute young Italian actor named Michele Placido. The film features a cameo by Catherine Deneuve and also stars Passolini lover Ninetto Davoli. I'll never forget when i first met Jodie Foster in 1975 at the opening of Famous Amos Cookie store on Sunset Blvd in Hollywood. She was with her mother, and was so butch she came on to me right in front of her mom who was more like her girlfriend then parent. Jodie thought i was a girl. Also at this opening was Andy Warhol, Faye Dunaway and her then husband Peter Wolf of the J. Geills Band. I wound up at this event by accident when the Preview House that i think is now Harmony Gold up the street was too full to let me in.

HEIMSPIEL IN GOLD
Last night at Cinemaxxx´s tiny screening room 4 saw the odd Japanese film End of Puberty/Koi ni itaru yamai by the wonderfully insane young Japanese directrix Kimura Shoko. The flicker features a nubile cast of two very personable and sexxy girls and one beautiful boy with the most luscious lips, pale skin and shrimpable feet. He looks like a homo anime come to life or Japanese boyband member. The movie features the exchange of genitals in a very Petrolio like manner that would make Passolini proud. Ms. Shoko is a new voice in film to herald.
This morning i woke up pretty early to catch Egyptian Brit Sally El Hosaini´s My Brother The Devil which boasts two delicious eyecandy leads in the strapping forms of thrombone James Floyd and pillowlipped Fady Elsayed. I wanted to kidnap both stars during the q&a. This gritty urban tale is electric glide & blue with dazzling cinematography and nuanced performances. The British street patois alone is enough for realness/healness. Like Ms. Shoko of End of Puberty Ms. El Hosaini is a formidable directing & writing talenta that i am proud to tell it from the mountain about.
Love Camel went to see Salma Hayek starring in La Chispa de la Vida a film by Alexander Iglesia. The film started one hour late at the Friedrich Stad Palast which garnished the ire of the crowd who showered the facilitator, star and director with a volly of boos.

DADDY WAR MAL COOL
Last night with Love Camel in tow or is that camel toe we went to Arsenal I to see the Cambodian kinky fractured fairytale Puos Keng Kang which in English i think is The Snake Man which is part of their Cambodian cinema golden era retrospectacle. The film from 1970 directed by Tea Lim Koun was everything that you expect in world cinemá--exotic, lush & lyrical with interspecies sex, madcap mugging by effeminate supporting players and barefoot big tittied Jeffrey Hunteresque matinee idols. Joining Camel and I was gorgeous Susanne Sachsse. The director of the film not only brought to the screening the surviving stars but half of Southeast Asia with him. Nearly three hours long it was all a whirling delight of the senses. Afterward we joined film historian Marc Siegel for some hot buttery gossip at the low rent Andy´s diner across the street that stays open all night. Marc Siegel and 84 year old director Wynn Chamberlin are now official BFF´s forever.
Earlier i went to HAU2 for the Harum Farocki presentation of La Verifica Incerta that is part of the wonderful Forum Expanded experimental section of the Berlinale. Received tender hugz and kisses from a radiant Arsenal Empress Stefanie Schulte Strathaus, and her co-curators the lovesexy scholar extrodinaire Nanna Heidenreich and the handsomest man in all of Europa Uli Ziemons who is now 30 years old and very manlische. The packed house also featured Ana Muelter, Katrin Dod the legendary beauty of HAU and the glamorous Dorothea Wenner who was chatting with actor Jake Gyllenhaul who few recognized and icelandic male ingenue Hilmar Gudjonsson.
My day started with Love Camel eating delish Mexican grub at Maria Bonita before catching a screening of the film Comes a Bright Day that was in the Generation 14 plus section. There were too many children at the Cinemaxxx theatre for my liking. Camel is brilliant but sometimes his taste in films are odd. He was telling me that in London he went to a screening of the Squarebob Squarepants film and was the only adult not accompanied by a child. Leaving Cinemaxx i ran into Women in Film legends Heidi Schluptmann & Corolla Grauman of Cinematek Asta Nielsen in Frankfurt, the famed duo was looking quite stylish and elegant in their winter gear who had
just left a screening of Sydney Pollack´s Out of Africa that was part of the tribute to Meryl Streep.
Had an interview with a clueless reporter from Variety Magazine who had been to my Getty performance in Los Angeles. He took me to breakfast at the Hyatt and grilled me about everything Berlin. I told him about CHEAP kollective and Forum Expanded and the Arsenal and he was hanging on every word. He also asked what i was reading lately and i told him i was given an advanced copy of the memoir by former JF Kennedy intern Mimi Alford Once Upon a Secret about her affair with the president. I plan on digging deep into the book when i fly to London for my birthday.

HEUTE NACHT ODER NIE
The Love Camel aka: Andrea Novarin has arrived in Berlin and is staying with his doll. Camel worked for many years at the BFI but decided to quit all of a sudden. Every year he comes to the Berlinale International Film Festival to soak in its cinema Palmolive. Last night he met me at the CineStar Theatre where the Forum was screening Wynn Chamberlain´s lost cult film Brand X that stars the phenomenal Taylor Mead, along with incredible comic performances by Sally Kirkland, Sam Shepard, Tally Brown (who almost steals the film from Taylor)Ultra Violet, Candy Darling and Jimmy Hendrix in a cameo. My Fertile La Toyah Jackson Video Magazine from the early 90s is the only thing i can compare this film to. Its almost as if i had seen Brand X and channeled it when i made Fertile, but of course I wasn´t aware of its existence. The director is a complete freak and at 84 years of age he doesn´t seem to be slowing down in his freakazoid outlook which i just love. In fact his voice sounds like a man in his early twenties. So glad this film is getting the revival it deserves. One of my favorite scenes is of a couple fornicating on top of a moving convertible and the delirious monologues of Taylor Mead that are pure genius and very au courrant. Also in the audience experiencing the joyous high from the film: Nanna Heidenreich, Uli Ziemons of Forum Expanded, Susanne Sachsse, Daniel Hendrickson, Anna Muelter, Annette Frick and Wilhelm Hein. It was so wonderful seeing Wilhelm who had been seriously ill. Its really not the Berlinale without a Wilhelm Hein sighting. Wilhelm Hein is Mr. Underground Cinema.
Wilhelm&Annette will host a special event at their art salon Casabaubou at See Strasse 107 in Wedding (U6& get off at See Str) Monday Feb 20th 17-21 urh. Its called Entities and its the first European presentation of new paintings by New York City legend Nick Zedd.
After the screening of Brand X Marc Siegel hosted a nice conversation with the director and fielded questions from the audience. Earlier in the evening Marc was also in fine form at HAU I talking with artists Catherine Sullivan and Farhad Sharmini after the screening of their film The Last Days of British Honduras an adaptation of Ronald Tavel´s little known play of the same name. It was nice meeting Catherine for the first time and seeing one of the film´s stars who use to live in Berlin. Catherine has collaborated with Sean Griffin who did the evocative score and Julianna Snapper as well as Asaf Hochman and Ron Athey. Some of the performers in the film had nice theatrical voices and one in particular looked like a young Tavel. I was crushing out on one young Latino man with sculpted eyebrows and a humpy black man with luscious lips.
The abrupt shifting from naturalness to anti-naturalism was a bit jarring and fell flat, but perhaps that was an aesthetic choices for some reason that didn´t resonate with me. I loved that they went with a work of Tavel´s that has no association with Warhol, and being that Miss Catherine is an artworld darling that in and of itself was daring.
In terms of the Forum Expanded program the panel CAIRO-The City, Images, The Archives on Saturday Feb 11th at the Deutsche Kinematek Event Room on the 4th floor of the Sony Filmhaus was an invigorating pure delight, and so timely. Kudos to head programmer and Arsenal Empress Stefanie Schulte Strathaus and her crack curatorial team of Nanna Heidenreich, Uli Ziemons, Anselm Franke, & Bettina Steinbruegge. Normally I hate panel discussions but this one kicked royal ass with Khalid Abadalla , a cute British/Egyptian actor and founder of Yero Productions and the alternative media kollective Mosireen, Hala Galal (via Skype) the filmmaker, producer, director of SEMAT production and distribution company, Maha Maamoun, artist, curator and co-founder of Contemporary Image Collective and Sarah Rifky the curator of Townhouse Gallery and founder of Cairo International Resource Center for Art/Documenta 13.
My new computer that West of Rome bought me in October has crashed. What is it with me and technology? I seem to have the worse possible luck. So of course this is the reason why its taking me so long to update the blogina. Please be patient with me. Hopefully after the film festival and after i return from London i can get Olga Damnitz to use her technical wizardy on my computer to rescue at least some of my blog posts that i had written as drafts about what i saw the first few days of the Berlinale.
The last thing i will mention is that I have been having a blast with Daniel Hendrickson my Japanese/Muslim BFF and partner in scrime at the Forum´s yearly classic Japanese cinema retrospectacle at Arsenal 1 and the Delphi. The films of Kawashima Yuzo are enchanting. Between Yesterday and Today, Suzaki Paradise: Red Light and The Sun in the Last Days of the Shogunate featuring comic star Frankie Sakai as a homosexual grifter running amok in a bordello were highlights of my screening antics this year. That and see cute Julius Bauer and spending quality time at the Forum Office at the Haus Huth with young South African film programmer Darryl Els who is the personification of Prince Charming.

EXTREM LAUT UND UNGLAUBLICH NAH
Back in Berlin from tour in Dusseldorf with Commi Biggi and I am still getting lots of emails about my Getty/Pacific Standard Time commission piece in Los Angeles. I forgot to mention that the awful icky fugly old bald headed queen John Kohner who manages the Bullock’s Wilshire for Southwest Law School also gave problems to the LA Conservancy when they did a much smaller less high profile event at the Bullock’s Wilshire so he has quite the bad reputation as a prissy infidel. How do people like him manage to get positions of authority?
Now its Berlinale time and since I work for the Arsenal and Forum Expanded, which is the experimental section of the international film festival I have to make my lady presence known. The first major event of the Berlinale season was the grand opening yesterday evening of Forum Expanded at the Kunstaele Salon at Bulow Strasse. I arrived with my famous dates Peaches and baby diaper Joel Gibb of the Hidden Cameras fresh from his sex tourism trip to Brazil. The diaper was looking tanned and humpy luscious, and had wonderful sexcapdes in San Paolo and Rio, but also hung out with Susie from the MIX Festival and Ricardo of Shade Inc. formerly Berlin Hilton. Ricardo is a famed Brazilian poet. Who knew?
Mr. Gibb is so dingy that he went to Brazil not knowing that he needed a visa and after a 36 hour plane ride was unceremoniously sent back to Berlin just to have to make the long trip again. Joel & Peaches had dinner earlier during at the Thai restaurant Papaya on the Haupt Strasse at Kleistpark.
I am so jealous of Joel's smoldering sex life. Well he is tall, handsome, talented and Canadian so of course he is going to be one hell of a desired beauty prize no matter what city he is in.
The Forum Expanded opening was packed to the rafters and everyone seemed to be in a joyous mood including Arsenal Empress Stefanie Schulte Strathous the head curator of Forum Expanded and my gorgeous lady boss with her vivacious compadres Nanna Heidenreich, Uli Ziemons, and Olga Damnitz. Ran into dirty white lovesexy French boy Michele Belague, Little Alex of Chocolate Grinder Film Kollective,sweet and innocent Christian Weber who will be my assistant for Camp/Anti-Camp and Speaking From the Diaphragm at HAU2 in April. Looking all pretty and bubbly Constanze Ruhm& Angela Melitopolous, dimunitive cutie pie with the perfect smile Anselm Franke chittle chatted with me and asked about my Getty/Pacific Standard Time commission piece in LA. I don't care how tiny Anselm is i sure would love for him to sit on my face. Hung out with kJohnny and Tim Blue, Daniel Hendrickson, Nazli Kilerci, my lesbian girlfriend Anna Muelter with her boss Matthias Lilienthal and the beauty of HAU Katrin Dod, fearless leader of CHEAP Susanne Sachsse and Israeli artist living in Canada Elle Flaners.
I was holding court in Luke Fowler’s All Divided Selves single channel HD video projection black room. Even though I was engrossed in conversation the RD Laing von Furstenberg pull of the archival footage still got me wrapped up in the very destroy all monsters quality of it all.
Heike Baronowsky’s Barometer (I) with its inflated weather balloons was a pure joy to behold. Uli Ziemons was telling me about Florian Wust’s Dienst an der Notwendigkeit which I saw as a melding of Jodie Foster in the film Carny with James Bridges’ The China Syndrome. Loved the drawings surrounding the tiny flat screen TV, but Mr. Wuss, I mean Wust had to ruin things by chastising me and Frau Sachsee for chit chatting too close to his prescious art blocking the view of the guests----as if anyone but the most stridently dorky at an opening really pays that much attention. Openings are for socializing you come back later if you really are interested in the art. These kunstlers who take themselves so damn seriously. POOVAH.
The next day I went to a press screening of Benoit Jacquot’s Les Adieux a la Reine/Farewell My Queen starring the lovely ingénue Lea Seydoux and German actress Diane Kruger as Marie Antoinette. Ran into well hung young writer Travis Jepperson in line. Travis now lives in London where he is working on his Phd but still takes writing assignments for Art Forum Magazine and is covering the Berlinale for them. He didn’t give up his Berlin apartment but is subletting it while he is away studying.
I found the film intriguing and beautifully composed. Frau Kruger’s lesbianic interpretation flawless especially in her scenes with gal pal Virginie Ledoyen. Kirstin Dunst who played Queen Marie in Sofia Coppola’s film a few years ago should have done some carpet munching on Asia Argenta. Discovered that Baby Diaper Joel Gibb was also at the screening so we billed and cooed until I had to trot off to Muslim Daniel Hendrickson’s flat. Later Daniel and I went to the second Forum Expanded opening at this new and wonderfully deconstructed space on Friedrickstrasse at Hallesches Tor called Guschow Haus where the hot lesbian Israeli artist Elle Flanders couldn’t care less if guests were chatting and blocking the view of her powerful Road Movie a six channel HD video installation produced by the National Film Board of Canada. This piece features a companion soundscape by audio artist Anna Friz. Ms. Flanders is known for her critical responses to Israeli treatment of the Palestinians.
Like the evening before everyone was in a festive mood which is just what an opening should be about. Making the scene Mr. Joel Gibb who adores Ms. Flanders with his favorite companion Peaches. Joel told me that the Interview Magazine party that he and Peaches went to last night wasn’t very good, so I am glad I held my ground and didn’t go with them to it. Travis Jepperson was with visiting Canadian artist John Monteith who lives in New York but wants to move to Berlin. Mr. Jepperson got balled out by Nanna Heidenreich of Forum Expanded for smoking in the basement viewing area. I didn’t want to get in the middle of their row so I klatched with Arsenal Empress Stefanie Schulte Strathaus, Olga Damnitz, Uli Ziemons, Angela Melitopoulos, Ela of bbooks, Katrin Dod with Anna Muelter of HAU and Nicole Wolf. I left with Susanne Sachsse, visiting South Afrikan film programmer Darryl Els who is the BFF of Daniel Hendrickson. I was starving so we grabbed some grub at the nearby Paracas Peruvian Restaurant where I had a delicious fish&shrimp soup and Peruvian style enchilada with guacamole and drank a banana agua fresca.

A CUBIST VERSION OF A SHAPELY WOMAN
While in Los Angeleeeze preparing for my Getty/Pacific Standard Time commission piece through West of Rome I watched a lot of cable TV in my hotel room. Sometimes I would just have the set turned on muted just to glimpse at images as I was painting and collaging my handmade artist books. With so many channels you’d think there would be something interesting on the boob tube, but usually there wasn’t. I finally got a chance to take a peak at the Housewives of . . . reality franchise. I was floored by the plastic surgery ladies of HW of Beverly Hills with their gaunt faces and duck like cartoon mouths constantly sniping at each other. The best thing about one particular episode was when this brittle English woman chastised her teenage son about sagging----the hip hop influenced trend where young men basically serve up their rear ends to the unsuspecting masses. This mother told her strapping blondine dopey looking child not to have his arse hanging out in West Hollywood as it sends the wrong message.
My dear old friend Meesh Mills works in the reality industry on the Rupaul Drag Race program produced by World of Wonder. She gave me some insights into the reality show phenomena and told me that on the HS of Bev Hills one of the stars is former child actress Kim Richards from the 1970s TV sitcom Nanny and the Professor and Disney film Escape From Witch Mountain. I didn’t recognize her at all as a middle aged brittle blonde. Meesh has also worked on Millionaire Matchmaker which I did watch for a bit and found amusing and Toddlers & Tiaras which i didn't.
NEUES JAHR, BESSERER SEX
When I was in Los Angeles staying at the Standard Hotel Downtown watching television I noticed that digital high definition TV is very odd and scattered in terms of quality. In Berlin I don’t have TV, and so I am not even sure if Germany has made the switch from analog to digital, but i certainly find digital problematic. Many times the signal would be lost and would just go out all together and not come back. And there is a weird sync problem with a bit of delay with the sound iminating from a person’s mouth when they are talking---its very strange. I loved staying at the Standard Hotel as its extremely comfy but very young and trendy especially on the weekends with their nightclubs and rooftop parties. With the gorgeous weather in Los Angeles it was difficult to have to return to Germany especially when I found out that Europe was experiencing record low temperatures.
My performance piece/Lesbian Seperatist tea party at the historic Bullocks Wilshire “My Pussy is Still in Los Angeles(I Only Live in Berlin)” seems to still be reverberating. I’ve been still getting tons of emails about the piece. It was SRO sold out crowd and here is a partial list of people who were there: Mark Simon, Stephen Schilling of The Boyfriend, Darby Romeo of Ben is Dead/I Hate Brenda fame in LA from Hawaii where she now lives and surfs. Darby looked great, very healthy and tanned. She was with her very young looking mother. Also in attendance: Jeffrey Hilbert of Custom Creative, Jason El Norte, Cesar Vega, Dan Peirera & posse, big peniled Mexico City boy Orlando with beau, Nick & Connor of Dejecta at MoCa, Lisa Derrick and the girls from teen band The GrownUps now actually all grown up, Theo Wenner the hungthrob son of Rolling Stone Magazines's Jann Wenner looking like one of the boys his father likes to have sex with,Dr. Jennifer Doyle, Tom Christie and his Berlin girlfriend Sonja, Andrew Gould and beau Uriel Miranda Vazquez, Craig Roose who works with photog David LaChapelle as a set designer, Mr. Green Jeans aka: Frank Hoffman and cutie pie Contessa, the sexy black novelist Lisa Teasley, Andrea Fraser, collector Pamela Robinson (who has bought a lot of my paintings from Invisible Exports Gallery in New York), artist Sandro Kopp, Melville Poupaud, Lauri Firstenberg, Jim Abrahms, Redcat curator Aram Moshayedi, Honor Fraser, swagger actor Tom Hardy, male ingenue Michael Cera,Michele Mills,Chris Oliveria the hunky major Ms. Gorgeous bubble butt young painter who is the haute beau of my lovesexy super talented hostessa Karen Lofgren who is transplanted Canuckian sculptress. Dawn Kasper (the new(ish) risk-taking performance powerhouse of LA, Dawn runs Human Resources space in Chinatown and is now in the Whitney Biennial), Corey Fogel(artist)Terry Wolverton,Kris Kiramitsu (curator)Catherine Taft (Critic, writer)Irene Tsastos (Armory Center Curator)Connie Samaras, Susan Silton, Glen Phillips of the Getty,Carol Stakenas (LACE director)Marnie Weber & Jim Shaw, legal eagle power couple Marlou De Luna and husband Hal Marinas, Karol De Graffenreid and husband Kael who use to be in the old punk rock band The Urinals,Glen Meadmore who did my fab make-up and hair styling, Charles McDowell the humpy young son of actor Malcolm McDowell(Clockwork Orange) and Mary Steenburgen,Hector Martinez & Eric Pierce, famed Woman’s Building feminists Sue Mayberry, Cherie Gaulke & Suzanne Lacy, Kimberly Kim of North Korea, who use to bartend at Bricktops at the Parlour and is now head mixologist at The Eagle(Silverlake).
After the performance I was completely exhausted. Special thanks and to Daniel Flores Estrella who designed the artist book for me and worked so very hard as my assistant on this trip. Poor Daniel having to deal with my many and varied mood shifts and neediness. I am not an easy girl to work with. Also a kissy kissy shoutout to Miss Caren the Administrative Director of West of Rome and her staff,Miss Maria the assistant of Emi Fontana, Esteban and Mario the cute and bubbly sound boys who kept things rolling very nicely and professionally, our chamber ensemble with Jose Promis on piano, Alberto on Violin and Emelia on cello---three very talented musicians who I would love to work with again. Also the divine Julianna Snapper who opened the piece with a magnificent prelude looking entirely enchanting and lovesexxxy. Of course all my love and kissy Kisstale goes to my twin art sister Dona Emi Fontana who first approached me about performing for this project way back in 2009 when she saw me at Performa Biennale.
Coming back to Germany I didn’t have any time to collect myself from jetlag. I was immediately off on a train in the freezing cold with Susanne Sachsse the fearless leader of CHEAP to Dusseldorf to perform Communist Bigamist at the FFT. We were staying at the tiny old fashion Hotel Rubin in the city center which was walking distance to the FFT which is housed in a beautiful art center near the olde town. I was so jetlagged I don’t know how I was able to do the que-to-que tech rehearsal, but seeing the Commi Biggi gang was very inspiring. kJohnny Blue, Nazli Kalerci, Anna & Sebastiane were all in such good moods and chirper that their energy was infectious. Also the sound tech at the FFT was a cute ueber manlische young man named German who I enjoyed flirting with. German improved the sound design for the show and I was able to hear things in kJohn Blue’s score that I didn’t hear in Berlin at HAU 3. FFT has the most incredible sound in a small non equity theatre.
The first performance we had a delightful all female feminist audience that included Claudia Bosse the Vienna stage director, the gorgeous and sexy Kathrin Tiedeman who looks like a moviestar and is the artistic director of the FFT. The lovely Kathrin use to be artistic director at the Podevil in Berlin and was responsible for the first CHEAP kollective performance CHEAP Jewelry at Volksbuhne/Praeter back in 2001Kathrin gave us a sweet present of the famed Heinemann Champagne Trueffel’s. These chocolates are world famous and are a particularly known stylish treat of Dusseldorf. After our performance Ms. Tiedeman and the very influential and important politician Miss Bettina, the Theatre Commissioner of Nord Rhein West Falen took us to the Museum bar, but it was way too crowded and smoky at this bar, and I was starving as I hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast at the hotel so we stopped off at a little Italian bistro for pasta and soup and called it a night as we had another show the next day. Saturday’s performance the audience was very pensive and studied, and you could tell that they were soaking all the information in. Our makeup artist Tan Binh Nguyen made Susanne and I even more beautiful then when we performed the piece in Berlin and his sweet best friend Billa who works as an executive for the Deutsch Bahn came to see the piece, said she was going to be spending the evening Googling all the names and references. Accompanying Billa was Michail Chodorkowski the handsome Russian industrialist known as the Rusky Rockefeller. Also in the audience the famous art couple Katherina Sieverding and Klaus Mettig. Miss Sieverding is one of the most enchanting,glamorous and deliciously ravishing women in all of Europe. She is all grace and gentility with a royal manner that is completely intoxicating. Her voice commands complete authority. I was exhausted after performing but talking with Katherina and Klaus after the show gave me a sudden burst of renewed energy. Also hanging out with us and drinking at the theatre bar was pretty Janine the head dramaturg at FFT, and cute Toby who works with Carena Schlewitt the director of Kaserne Theatre Basel. Carena founded the Hebbel Theatre in Berlin with Matias Leienthal and first brought CHEAP Kollective to HAU. Communist Bigamist will be making a tour stop in Basel, Switzerland for the big art fair which should be a lot of fun. Of course I was starving again so Ms. Sieverding and Mr. Mettig took us to dinner at this cute tapas restaurant called Lauren’s Marina on Bismarckstr 62 which stays open till 5am and is run by a Spaniard and his no nonsense Korean wife. The place reminded me of the Schwartzer Café in Berlin and had a similar late nite ambiance and crowd with delicious food and drink. It was kJohnny Blue’s birthday so we celebrated until 3am even though we had an early train to catch.
***
This funny email from a hornpig in LA.

My Dearest Negress,

I hope ur keeping Warm.

I had received several notes from a Hot Swimmer I play with, his Butt is a piece
of Art, and he needed some attention.

We finally connected tonight. He greeted me in a pair of some really fitted
jeans showcasing his hot Ass. We immediately got into his room, I stripped
him down and wasted no time in chowing down on his ass.

We had just started, he was straddling my face, I was rimming his ass, he was
Sucking my Dick! My favorite set up. So there we are, he took a hit of
Poppers, I passed on the Poppers and continued on his Ass. All of a sudden I
felt an oozing issue! I turned my mouth and face, but it was Too Late! I had
Dookie Water down the side of my mouth, neck and chest!

He jumped off me, he said, he thought he was cumming! He saw the mess, it was
also running down his leg... I ran to the bathroom, I washed out my mouth,
rinsed with Listerine and started the shower. I thought I was going to puke for
a minute as I was smelling the Shit on me. I pulled myself together, jumped in
the shower. I didn't puke. I told the Hot Swimmer to jump in the shower and
that he not Freak out. The guy was Horrified!

He said he took two enemas to prepare for me. This guy is always Super Clean!
I told him I was fine and for him to get his ass in the shower.

Oh Sweet Doll, he was a mess. The sheets were also dirty.

I told him I was not New to Ass Hole Accidents and that I was fine and would be
cool with a Rain Check if he was up for a continued session. I wanted to Fuck
him, but I kind of knew it wasn't going to happen.

He settled down and gave me a really Good back, Butt and leg Massage. I then
made my exit.

The poor Guy was a bit of a wreck. I am sure I will not be seeing him again.
Its too bad, His Ass is so Fucken Beautiful!

So there u have Negressa, ur Warrior can still smell the Dookie on him. This
was definitely worse then a straight guy Farting while getting Rimmed.

That's what happens when ur Hot for Ass-Holes!

GORDIN FLONA
Completely exhausted from my West of Rome/Getty/Pacific Standard Time piece that was a super SRO hit at the site specific location of the Bullocks Wilshire Department Store. Have to leave this morning for Europe to get back in time to continue Communist Bigamist tour. Not looking forward to the 23 degree farenheit freezing winter weather. LA temps have been summerlike with clear blue skies and dreamy moonlit nights. Pure romantic and a nice homecoming. It only rained once and it was a brief downpour.
There was soooo much drama in dealing with this hideously fugly, tiny old queen who manages the Bullocks Wilshire for the Southwest Law School that owns the building. The creature in question is named John Kohner and he and his brittle back up singer/assistant were so glum and sourfaced and uncooperative with West of Rome as they were producing my piece using the Louis the 14th and Chanel Room on the 2nd floor. This John Kohner character really needs to be permanently retire. Luckily my longtime friend MarLou DeLuna who is a lawyer for the State of California has connections with the Southwest Law Schools board of directors and he was told by his bosses to stand down, but he didn't listen to them so now he will have to not only face my wrath but that of powerful parties in the mayor´s office as i will begin a letter writing campaign to not only the Southwestern Law School board of directors but also their donors and believe you me this will get notice and hopefully he will be removed from his tired person thiefdom.
Lots of celebrities at my performance like Warhol Superstar Ms. Holly Woodlawn looking completely fabulous with her art companion Niko. Ms. Woodlawn will be coming to Berlin as part of Camp/Anti-Camp and so Europe gets a royal treat from She Who Must Be Obyed. Other starinas at my performance was Jeffrey Deitch the director of MoCa, the hot Ukranian dancer Sergei Polunin who just shocked the ballet world by walking away from Britain's Royal Ballet. Many more celebutants that i will mention later in another post. But i have to finish packing so please check back with me soon and be patient as i need a little recoup time.
***
Back in Germany and now on my way to Dusseldorf for the Communist Bigamist tour. Received this email from Karen Lofgren that sensationally gifted LA artist Mike Kelly is dead. He was born in 1954 which makes him very young still. I can´t believe he is no longer with us. I just had dinner with him a few days ago at the home of West of Rome founder Emi Fontana. I knew he had been feeling depressed lately, but at dinner his spirits were lifted and we were all laughing and having a grand old hoot of a time. Now i am feeling very sad.

DIRECTORY TO THE SERAGLIOS
Had breakfast down the street from the hotel at Caffe Primo Pegasus. Their gourmet outmeal is delicious. Back at the hotel worked on my paintings for the artist book and cutting out images from mags and newspapers for the collages. Had lunch with the divine Julianna Snapper who is part of the piece and we ate some mega delicious burgers at the Standard restaurant. It was lovely catching up with Ms. Snapper who is a genius and great beauty.
In the evening I finally was able to see one of the Pacific Standard Time public events at the National Center for the Preservation of Democracy on North Central Avenue. Since arriving on January 12th I have been doing nothing but working on my performance piece and artist books so it was great to see someone else’s work and take a little breather.
Emi and West of Rome produced the Andrea Fraser piece that I saw called Men on the Line, KPFK, 1972. The piece was developed from a 1972 live radio broadcast of a dialogue between four men committed to feminist struggles. I loved how static the piece was and Ms. Fraser is an incredible actress, subtle and plaintive. I could never remember so much text and make it so believable but also liquidy and restrained. The SRO audience was mesmerized and what a good looking crowd of divergent types and ages. I chittle chatted with Marnie Weber and her hot celebritiy art posse, and the sweet and lovely British friend of Stuart Comer Ms. Sarah McCrory who is a curator with the Frieze Foundation. So nice seeing Jade, Malik and Alex of My Barbarian and Caren & Marie of West of Rome. Emi was looking very stylish in a culot pin stripe suit. It was sweet of Dr. Jennifer Doyle to give me a ride home as I walked to the venue, because I couldn’t remember the schedule of the dash buses.
This morning had a veggie omelet at The Yorkshire Grill on 6th Street and the Korean owner remembered me from last year when i had the MoCa show and was staying at the Standard.
This just in: Got word that the severed head that was found in the Hollywood Hills under the famous sign belonged to a regular at the Spotlight hustler bar. The bar has been closed for awhile, but the poor murder victim was known as an older man who hired rough trade, and since Ms. Los Ang is very crystal meth oriented it would make sense that the killing was a trick that went sour as most street male concubines are a bit on the tweaky side.
Had breakfast with Karen Lofgren this morning at the Standard restaurant. She is going to be one of my glam hostesses for my piece on Sunday. So wonderful catching up with her. She will be in a group art show below are the details. Karen is one hell of a talented artist, and made my vagina dentata sculpture that was featured in my Present Penicative installation and video for Technova song.

HR in Jan/00:00RESET Jan 27th, FRIDAY: 8pm OPENING NIGHT

HUMAN RESOURCES UPSTAIRS GALLERY PRESENTS

MEETINGS a collaborative exhibition with works by Karen Lofgren, Molly Larkey, Larissa Brantner James, Dylan Mira, Juliana Paciulli, and many many more

LIVE PERFORMANCES:
Sheree Rose begins at 8pm (main space)

Raquel Gutierrez and Jeanne Cordova 8:15pm (main space)

Oscar Santos (w/ Alex Black, Samuel Vasquez, Karen Centerfold, Alice Cunt, Paloma Parfrey, Rafael Esparza, Allen Bleyle, Larissa James / Organizer: Oscar Santos / Psychic Director: Asher) 8:45pm (backroom storage space)

Tyler Matthew Oyer 9pm (main space)

Larissa Brantner James 9:30pm (main space)

Chiara Giovando 9:45pm (main space)

Last night Andrew Gould came over to my hotel room and helped me go over the albums that i will be using for my piece on Sunday. It was great having him help me, and bouncing ideas off of him. He has excellent taste. I love Andrew, and his new muscular frame and hunky body.

Hectrice picked me up from the Standard and took me to this cute El Salvadorean place on Beverly Blvd and Berendo called Atlacatl Family Restaurant. We had the best pupusas and pan de pavo. Now we are back at Hector's beautiful compound on Maltman Avenue in Silverlake. Hector has an amazing view of the Hollywood sign and Griffith Park Observatory. His next door neighbor is this old Lithuanian who is a Nazi sympathizer with pictures of Hitler and swastikas in her house which was the first modern house on the block. Her husband was a famous architect and they use to have a large house in Hancock Park. The old Nazi lady is estranged from her children and several years ago her sister and obese nephew were living with her, butthe sister died and the nephew who use to order hustlers on a regular basis committed suicide. The Old Nazi lady is now completely out of it due to Alzheimer's and is being taken care of by a Filipino home health care nurse and her husband. That should be the fate of all neo Nazi's.
Hector and i are waiting for my assistant Daniel to come so we can pull an all nighter working on my artist book.

FEYO, FUERTE Y HONESTO
Had a Skype call with Communism aka Daniel “the Jewish Muslim” Hendrickson” and he told me that President Obama was just in LA and he went to eat dinner at Roscoe’s Chicken & Waffles on Pico Blvd. Danny is going to visit his parents in the States and they will be hanging out in the Miami, Florida area and then he will spend a few days in little old New York.
Had a nice visit at the hotel with my sexy MoCa Dejecta boys Rashid and Jonathan along with Daniel. We went to a Mexican restaurant on Spring Street that’s down the street from the Alexandria Hotel. Spring Street has really gotten gentrified. I didn’t recognize the street anymore, and all these trendy people walking their little yappity dogs----yuk. After lunch we went to the Grand Central Market for coffee and I ran into Suzy Beal who now lives in Tujunga. We also took a peek into the Mexican bar La Cita where a banda band was playing and some people were dancing. In the back patio some downtown trendies were getting their afternoon drink on. We rode Angels Flight to the top of Bunker Hill and boy is Angel’s Flight ever rickity. It was put out of commission for many years after it broke and killed a German tourist.
Hector came by to pick me up and take me to dinner at Emi Fontana’s South Pasadena home where she made a killer Italian feast for for three kings. Also at dinner were the famous artists Marnie Weber and Mike Kelly. The conversation was very lively with Mike talking about seeing the films Human Centipede and Phillip Morris that starred Ewan McGreggor and Jim Carrey. Emi also showed us a short film by her boyfriend Michael that perfectly captured the spirit and feel of the Trespass Parade and Party

Dr. Jennifer Doyle hosts this very interesting salon. I wasn’t able to attend but here is some info on what was going on:

A Free & Open Seminar on Performance: Three Sundays (Jan 8, 15, 22)

This is a feminist conversation about politics and practice in performance, for artists & allies (programmers, hosts, writers, friends, lovers, spectators, crew, the band!) - This seminar is inspired by the city's history of feminist art pedagogy and is part of Human Resource's contributions to Pacific Standard Time.


January 8th, 15th and 22nd: 1pm-4pm
at Human Resources
410 Cottage Home St in Chinatown, 90012

Join us for an exploration of the questions raised in contemporary performance - while our agenda will be set collectively, the impetus for organizing this seminar was sparked by the intensity of the conversations that grew up around Yvonne Rainer's critique of Marina Abramovic's work with MOCA's 2011 gala fundraiser.

Those conversations have taken up the nature of feminist performance; the relationship of live art and performance to museum culture; the relationship of Los Angeles performance to independent spaces like HR; sexuality in performance; risk - as programmers or curators understand that and as artists understand that; survival - economic and emotional; race, class and "the art world" (what does that phrase mean); the "recovery" of Chican@ and African American art by that "art world" (e.g. exhibits across PST).

This is an interesting moment for performance artists - on the one hand, financial support for the genre is as dire and as politicized as ever - but the genre also has a lot of visibility and new forms of institutional currency. What does it mean to stage a feminist exporation about the politics and practice of performance? Contemporary feminist politics resists looking at sex/gender questions in isolation: race, class, ethnicity, the legacies of settler colonialism, the long shadow of the prison industrial complex - how and where to these issues factor into performance politics and practice? Add to this the way that new media forms make "old media" practices increasingly problematic - who owns their image in an age whose those images circulate widely and freely via the internet? How do artists differently confront the politics of their practices? What stake do queer/feminist artists have in those debates about appropriation and image rights?

These seminars will give artists & allies a chance to talk about the shifting sands upon which we work - this is a chance to examine the present but also to learn about the past (the NEA wars, the roots of performance as an anti-capitalist practice, the full range of feminist work in performance, queer performance [again, what does that mean?], the roots of performance in the political, interventionist strategies of artists of color).

BETHANY EVER AFTER
Had a lovely meeting with Jose Promis, one of my beautiful Bricktops at the Parlour Club children who will be playing piano as part of my chamber ensemble for my Getty/Pacific Standard Time/West of Rome commission piece.It was lovely catching up with the handsome Mr. Promis who will be celebrating his birthday next Saturday when we have our dress rehearsal.
Its been grenada being back in Los Ang and the weather has certainly cooperated, but there is also a bit of a chill in that a severed head and body parts were found in Griffith Park below the Hollywood sign. You never know when danger will pop out at you here in the southland.
Two musical legends died this week---Etta James 73 and Johnny Otis 90. Ms. James had been suffering from cancer so her death was expected. Mr. Otis was a Greek man who melded into the African American diaspora so well that after so many years of living the negro life he actually ceased being a caucasion man.
Friday Hector ran me around town doing errands, and it took quite a bit of time negotiating the heavy non rush hour traffic. Had a sweet time with Hectrice(his new female name). He treated the doll to lunch at Tender Greens in WeHo on Santa Monica Blvd. I had the best BBQ chicken salad and soup. The tacky queens of the boulevard were in high gear and I had forgotten how amusing they could be.
We wound up at Farmers Market and the Grove and some point and had coffee and sweet rolls and oogled some gorgeous male beauties walking about with their bubble butts and flip flops. We ended our errand run in Silverlake, and back at Hector’s house on Maltman we had took time for cocktail hour and Hector made some incredible Vodka tonics. Hector’s lover Ericla came back from work and Hector cooked us a yummy snack with homemade hummis, then they dropped me off back at the Standard Hotel. I got back to working on my special artist book and later in the evening was visited by handsome Andrew Gould and his amazing young lover Uriel Miranda Vazquez who is a dream boy if ever there was one. It was so nice to take a break from my prep work and just hang out with this super attractive virile male couple and enjoy their masculine company.
The next morning I took a walk around downtown and discovered that the Embassy Hotel is closed down and boarded shut but the building on Grand & 9th is still imposing. At the top of the hotel is the divine Crystal Room. Actually the Cyrstal Room was my second choice of a site specific location that I wanted to use for this commission piece.
Dr. Jennifer Doyle took me for a fab early birthday breakfast at the trendy boite Bottega Louie in the old Brooks Brothers Building on 7th and Grand. This place is incredible. Our waiter looked like a young boy from the 1920s, and the other waiters were equally stunning. My Lobster Hash was heavenly. We went at the perfect time before it got super crowded as later on it got so loud it was impossible to hear each other as we chittle chatted. Dr. Doyle is applying for Amelia Jones’s old position at the University of Manchester. I hope she gets the job as I think Los Angeles just isn’t a good place for her and England could provide the perfect ticket for new stimuli for Dr. Doyle’s brilliant scholarship and writing.
My old punk rock pal Craig Roose took me to lunch at the Fisherman’s Outlet Seafood Restaurant and Market at 529 South Central Avenue. This place is legendary and is always packed to the rafters during the week with City Hall workers, businessmen and everyone who adores good old fashion grub. Craig and I both ordered the giant shrimp with cole slaw and dirty sleepy rice. After eating we drove around some of our old punky haunts off of Traction Avenue and talked about the old club The Hideaway which was run by this nerdy black punk guy in the late 70s who ran a clothing store next to the Vista Theatre called Alien. Later he had a store on Washington Blvd near Arlington called Checkerboard and he taught elementary school as a day job. I wonder what happened to him. Craig didn't remember him. I was so happy when Craig took me to a 99cents and under store at 2220 So Central Avenue near Adams that was incredible. I bought so many things that I needed for making my artist books. Craig went back to the hotel with me and we caught up on many things as I was working, laughing and hooting it up. I really love Craig,he is such a dear ole pal.

FUTZENEID/PUSSY ENVY
At the Amstedam Airport which has the stupidest name in the world--- Stippol or something like that. Why are there no cute boys in the Netherlands? Its not as bad as Poland which only has beautiful women--all the men look like Lech Walensa but almost as bad.Not one piece of male eye candy at the aerport.
Some aeroport worker who was tiny but nominally attractive and young, asked me some invasive questions about my traveling experience and use of the airport facilities. I told the little laptop of a boy that I always ask to transfer through Amsterdam as the other airports like Heathrow and DeGaulle either lose your luggage, have frequent delays or go on unexpected general strikes. I also told him they need more bathrooms in the boarding area and a better food court. He asked me how old am I and I said how old do you want me to be?
Of course I couldn’t get a good night sleep before traveling, just tossed and turned all night and listened to NPR Berlin. Communism aka: Daniel Hendrickson called me a cab and it was waiting for me bright eyed and bushytailed at 3:30 am. The Turkish driver was a young grump. I had opened the window because his taxi smelled so badly of funk and kebab grease but he complained that the cold air was aggrevating his sinuses or something in German that I couldn’t understand. Thank god that so early in the morn there was little traffic so we just sailed into Tegel Aeroport. The nice pursor on the plane asked a smallish woman sitting in an exit row if she would change with me so I had a nice comfy ride for the short pitstop to Holland. One of the trolley dolly’s was very personable good time Sally who took a major liking to me.
In Amsterdam I got to board the plane quickly and everything was looking very Bernadette Cooper. I didn’t get an exit row, but I had two empty seats which would make my trip to LA very comfortable. In fact the plane wasn’t so crowded and there were plenty of empty seats. But of course everything went wrong when they announced that something is wrong with the plane and we have to get off and board another one at a different gate delaying the trip for 3 hours. That’s a first for me. At least we didn’t have to sit on the tarmac for ages like in New York.
Because of the delay I loose my empty seats, but I did get a nice seat mate in a Korean mother who was very bubbly and talkative. Hector Martinez picks me up at the aeroport and its warm and lovely in Los Ang. I check into the Standard Hotel Downtown and my room is fantastic with a great Rear Window view of the loft apartment building The Pegasus where there are lots of hunks taking showers or showing off taunt pectorals in their windows like redlight district hookers. Hector took me to eat at Phillipe’s French Dip and I scarfed down a lamb sandwich and split pea soup that was out of this world.
In the morning Hector and I had breakfast at the Pantry after his workout at Gold’s Gym Downtown. LA keeps getting more and more expensive, and I’m sad to report that its infected The Pantry. But I shouldn’t complain because the Pantry is still cheaper then most places in LA, but the prices have gone up considerably which is a dirty shame.
My pretty & sweet young latino assistant from Inglewood, Daniel picks me up for our big walk-through at the Bullocks Wilshire Friday morning. I am completely jet lagged and excrement for brains. Our tour guide John comes with his own seven sisters type back up singer. John is quite officious and reminds me a little of the golden era Hollywood character actors Franklyn Panborn and Edward Everett Horton.
So great seeing my spiritual art sister Emi Fontana the creative director of public art agency West of Rome and her right hand gal Caren who is one of the world's most organized women. Their crew includes assistant Maria, and lovely Cathy Garcia of Daddy Magazine and hip architects Ravi & Frank.
I have many lovely memories of shopping at the Bullock’s Wilshire in the 70s and 80s including the wonderful going away party for me back in the early 80s at the Bullock’s tea room for my first big performances in New York City. John of the South Western Law School who manages the building also showed us the Dean’s offices and patio garden with luscious views of the Lafayette Park Wilshire corridor.
After the walkthrough Emi took us to Langer’s Deli in MacArthur Park for some yummy pastrami sandwiches. Later at the Standard hotel my hot British husband Andrew Gould came by with snacks and we got re-acqainted. It was marvelous spending time with hunky Andrew who is writing for the Guardian Newspaper as well as working for National Public Radio.
Saturday I had a long conversation with Glen Meadmore who told me he saw the famous homeless rollerskating queen of Beverly Hills who is an LA fixture since the 1970s His look these days is a bearded clam, a black hoody and spandex pantalettes. This famed LA character usually haunts Sunset Blvd in Beverly Hills near the famous park where George Michael was caught in the urinals or he’d be skating down Robertson Blvd near Burton Way.
Hector Martinez was sweet in taking me shopping on Hollywood Blvd to Miss Ellen’s wigstore, then we met with the fantastic Ms. Michele Mills of World of Wonder and Entertainment Tonight and we ate Mexican food at this cute little trendy place on Hollywood Blvd that made the most delish peach/mango Margarita’s. Later I met Emi on the rooftop of the Standard for drinks. I was going to go to some openings with her, but my stomach was acting up and I was starting to suffer from the flying patooties mixed with jet lag so it was best to stay in my nice comfy hotel room. Was paid a visit from my old cronies Dora of Ventura and Mark “Clitoris Turner” Maxwell and their posse who were just at the Music Center’s Ahmanson Theatre to see the Broadway musical Fela! Our other old pal from the 80s Boofy St. Marie designed the costumes for this play. It was sweet to re-connect with some familiar faces.
Sunday morning I had breakfast at House of Pies with my sister Teresita and my niece Terri Lynn Taylor who is so obese she makes Precious from the movie look like a size -0. Hadn’t seen my niece in almost 8 years. She has 4 or 5 children and her husband has been in jail for several months. It was nice connecting with relatives, though they all seem to have a very dark cloud hovering over them. My sister is a hoarder, and she just was released from the hospital and I am afraid she doesn’t have the drive for life. My close relatives are all dropping like flies. Its very sad.
Later that evening Marlou DeLuna and her husband Hal Marines took me to dinner at Taix on Sunset Blvd in Echo Park. I ordered the split pea soup, a Ceaser Salad and Muscles with Pommes Frites and drank two very strong vodka Gimlets. The waiters overheard us talking about my birthday and they surprised me with a chocolate mousse and sang Happy Birthday to me and the entire restaurant joined in. It was very embarrassing. And it takes a lot to embarrass me. After dinner Marlou & Hal dropped me off at Jeffreyland Hilbert’s house around the corner on LeMoyne Avenue and Jeffrey and I caught up on every little thing while he made some very potent cocktails in his usual style. Jeffrey's business with my former Club Sucker partner Frank Rodriguez Custom Kreative is branching out from advertising with the film and entertainment industry into making labels, and designs with non entertainment corporate clients and also doing design and creative directing of bars and restaurants. They have designed a new bar in downtown LA on 2nd & Broadway called The Pony Lounge that has an equestrian theme and they have also done the ads for a new film that is in dramatic competition at Sundance Film Festival called Middle of Nowhere directed by Ava Duvernay and features musical supervision by one of my other good friends Ms. Morgan Rhodes.
Something tells me we are going to be hearing a lot about Custom Kreative and Jeffreyland Hilbert. I adore me some Jeffreyland. He is fantasticals.
Monday Daniel brought me some snacks and more art supplies to work on my artist book and his friend Louis took us to Chinatown for some dimsum. We were going to the Police Academy Coffee Shop in Chavez Ravene but since it was Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. day the place was closed. I was very sorry about that as I was looking forward to oogling some cute police recruits and then walk the Elysian Park parths to check out the infamous gay cruising that happens there. Daniel’s muscular friend Louis is a hairdresser/realtor by trade and is very vivacious and sweet. Had a nice time with the boys. Later Andrew Gould came by my hotel with some tacos from a stand in Highland Park. The grub was delicious and we cleaned out a bottle of white wine on top of that.