Latest News | Biography | Filmography | Performances and Exhibitions | Discography | Bibliography | Zineography | Press | Links | Photos | Merchandise and Contacts

Thursday, June 13, 2019



Überall Erhältlich

The Vagimule doll had a very bad bicycleta accident where she lost her equilibrium and vaunted straight into a light pole in Gleisdreieck Park. She fell off the bike, wounded and in shock bleeding at the knee and feeling like she had broken her shoulder and ribs. Some Good Samaritans called an ambulance and she was rushed off to the Evangelische Elizabet Hospital with a very good looking well built blondine EMT boy tending to her.

At the emergency room X-rays revealed she didn’t break any bones but was still bloodied, bruised and in considerable, pain so it doesn’t seem like our lady will be doing very much of anything for a while.

In a hobbled state a few weeks later The Doll met with Zach Schönheit for luncheon at Academie Der Kunst at Hansaplatz.

Zach was one of her beautiful young NYU students who collaborated with her and Fearless Leader of CHEAP Kolektiv Susanne Sachsse on The Magic Flute, An Opera in Six Steps back in 2015. Now Zach is in a masters program in Brussels and doing and looking very good.

A little later Uli Ziemons also took the Vagimule to lunch where she provided the handsome German heartthrob with much needed feminine companionship as his lady love was busy working on an art project in Athens, Greece. Before meeting with Uli Ms. Davis’ wonderful Arab masseur and healer Ameen brought her some special crèmes and ointments from Poland for ailing knee joints and swollen feet. Aging certainly isn’t for sissies.

The Love Camel aka: Andrea Novarin came through Berlin to take Ms. D. on holiday in Palermo, Sicily to help in her healing process. Before leaving on vacation the two were invited to dinner at the glorious new Stalin Strasse compound of Christoph Bovermann and his hot young lover J.P. Horstmann. Christoph was one of Ms. Davis’ brilliant students from Geissen Universitaet where she taught a seminar in 2014. Christoph is a skilled chef and hostess with the mostess on his Berkin bag sized balls.

In Palermo Love Camel and The Doll stayed at the gorgeous villa of Camel’s aristocratic cousin Nicoleta Polo Lanza Tomasi, The Duchess of Palma di Montechiaro. It was certainly splendid to inhabit a giant palazzo with humungous ceilings and marble floors. La diva Davis is very rough on her surroundings and wound up breaking the toilet seat with her giant Bertha butt in the cavernous bathroom. The famed Duchess is as generous as she is celebrated.

The La Ms. Davis was so happy she didn’t have to be “ON” for anyone in Italy, and simply enjoyed eating non stop at some fantastic boites like Pasticceria Cappelo on Via Nicolo Garzilli, Rosanero Ventisettiembre on Via XXSettembre, Mo Avast on Via Isidorolo Lumia, Primi Piatti and the working class restaurant Al Magnum where they were tended to by a beefy Sicilian ginger. The weather in Palermo was perfect at 70 degrees Fahrenheit. It didn’t start to get hot until it was time to leave the island. Returning back to Berlin during an uncomfortable heat wave.

Ms. Davis and Love Camel did check out the environ of the Queer Sicilia Festival. They didn’t go to any movies but hung out at one of the impromptu bars during Aperitivo where they ran into feminist DJ sensation Bianca Kruk looking very lovesexy and rapper sex god Mykki Blanco who relayed to Ms. D. that he wrote to her via post when he was a mere child of 15 and she wrote back giving him encouragement that helped spur the international career he now enjoys. Mykki was on the jury of the film festival in Palermo.

Sad to relay the news of the recent passings of black artist extroidinaire Joe Overstreet, actor Patrick Macnee of the 60s TV series The Avengers and the actress Sylvia Miles. Ms. Davis has always said that a trip to New York wasn´t really anything without a celebrity sighting of Miss Sylvia Miles on the streets of downtown Manhattan. She will be missed.

So many people have written asking for another preview of Vaginal Davis´ upcoming novel Mary Magdelene that because she has been so remiss in posting her blog she will make it up to her subscribers with this little tidbit:

Blister was looking and feeling good. Just like Bernadette Cooper of the R&B group Klymaxx. Certainly diva’s need love too and Blister was going to get his full share at the Sunday afternoon private Long Beach Sexall Party he was anxious to attend.

Blister was 32 years old and would be one of the youngest of the attendees as the average age of the men was about 50 with some having Dad bods. Blister would get a lot of attention with his tight,lean frame and voluptuous asstrovar. The last month he was at the party everyone was fighting over him, and the most well endowed and fit of the daddies he allowed to pummel him in an Equity Sling. Talk about greedy, after each man would ejaculate into his anuska he would slyly murmer with a finger in his mouth, “Next”.

Giving each new conquest a full heaping of Bambi eyed innocence acting as if he had no idea how he wound up in this situation with his feet in stirrups as a line of 15 men waited patiently for their turn to mount him.

Leticia Corral, Dinah Bides, Elva Navarez and Lisa Montelegre were the unabashed queens of Berendo Jr. High School. I was completely surprised when Lisa was able to hold her own in a fight in which she was challenged by my downstairs neighbor Juanita “Nitabug” Aikins. Juanita’s mother Helen Aikins use to run insurance scams and one of her fake names was Yolanda Carter. I started calling my mother by that name and was shocked when she would play along. I usually always called my mother Mommy even though at age five she asked me to call her by her first name Mary. Somehow I could never get the hang of calling her by her Christian name, but Yolanda was something different. I liked the name Yolanda and so did my mother. My mother was so very formal always calling me Ms. Davis, but I was equally prissy in calling her Yolanda Carter, Yolanda Carter. My sisters never questioned it though Uncle Trash, my lesbian uncle thought it was disrespectful.

After Lisa and Juanita’s fight they became good friends securing each other’s respect. I certainly didn’t want to be on the bad side of two of the school’s toughest girl leaders, but I didn’t like the way they treated poor Lucy Swink. Besides her unfortunate surname Lucy was half Japanese and White and for some strange reason got a bad reputation. How does one get a bad reputation? In elementary school the girl was Gladys Gonzales. Gladys’ only crime was developing pendulous breasts in the 5th grade. I did see her holding hands once with Eric Knightbridge, who looked like Marlon Jackson of The Jackson Five and going back behind her apartment building on Harvard with Eric where I assume they were doing “the pussy”. But what was doing “the pussy”? Basically a boy would just rub up on a girl fully clothed and kiss on the mouth. Was that really enough to get one a reputation? And what about Lucy Swink? Juanita and Lisa ganged up on her telling her to keep her legs closed. Since I was the Rona Barret of Berendo Jr. High I told both girls that Lucy doesn´t need to keep her legs closed as long as Juanita was opening hers for Michael Ermitage and Lisa was doing things with Raymundo Romano on the steps of the 1st Baptist Church on Dewey Street. That shut them up and Lucy was forever grateful to me for coming to her rescue. In 1976 Lucy, Linda Wong who was my first dag crush and I snuck into the Starwood in West Hollywood to see Vicki Sue Robinson perform.

On the car radio was an NPR report of how one retired New York City police officer of the pre Stonewall era felt remorse for the bad treatment he perpetrated upon homosexuals during that era.

“I am truly sorry for what I did to all those faggots back then” said Sgt Mauricio Caputo of the 12th Precinct.

“I use to rough ‘em up and make a lot of them suck my d**k. Now I realize I was wrong, and I was takin’ advantage of the situation. I musta got sucked off at least five or six times a day back then, and hey man, that just wasn’t right and I apologize.”

Blister was feeling a bit peckish so he pulled into the drivethru of a Taco Bell and ordered two been burritos. He had finished them by the time he pulled up to the party house. It was 6pm and the event had been going on since 4.

As the new arrival all the men immediately coalesced around him. He walked in clad only in shredded Daisy Dukes and flip flops. Almost like being in a mosh pit he was lifted in the air and placed on a velveteen love seat where one man was doing the puppy chow on his scrotum and another on his wank, while two others were nursing at his taunt pectorals as if he could produce mothers milk. It was all getting a little bit too much overstimulation when an Alpha he had never seen at this party before swooped in on him. The dude was about 45 years old with a buzz cut looking like a tall Jason Statham. He lifted Blister up and took all 5’ 8’’ of him directly to the sling where he promptly started performing sloppy analingus on him making loud slurpy and slushy sounds which galvanized the attentions of everyone at the party. A crowd started to gather but kept a respectful distance not wanting to break the harmony of the moment. Blister loved being the focus of everyones attention and was trying to give downtrodden eyes and fake being somewhat humbled by the experience. Blister’s penis was fully erect way past his belly button. Blister was fully aware that he was the beauty prize. Suddenly it felt like there were a thousands mouths devouring him. Everyone had divided his body up into sections like Cousin Sebastian in Suddenly Last Summer. The man who started it all was using his velvet mouth to slowly give him sweet loving soul kisses. Three men were giving each of his feet a thorough tongue bath. For a dimunitive man Blister wore a size 13 shoe.

All this seemed to go on for hours but it was probably more like 25 minutes when the man who had staked his claim put his penis in Blister`s mouth and this move was pure enchantment. Usually Blister wasn’t so enamored of penises of such unheralded girth and length. But everything about this man felt right. Blister knew what would be the outcome, namely the perfect sex scene that everyone would be talking about for months or even years.

The man entered in him easily enough his sphincter ring fully relaxed from so many hungry mouths coveting him before. Blister was surprised at the speed of his thrusting hoping that he would go slow and make it last a long time, but if it was going to be wham Alabam style he was alright with it. Everyone else seemed to be in on it as well. The loud slapping sound of testicles bouncing off of rump was heightening the tension in the room. When the man removed his penis from the anal cavity to survey his accomplishments and gain the admiration of those gathered is when Blister heard a vooshing sound and a plop as Linda Blairish projectile spray began to emanate from him with the appropriate smells to match. The two perfect bean Burritos that he had eaten earlier that he was sure would not be digested till the next day made an impromptu appearance abruptly ending the gathering.