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Wednesday, March 16, 2022

schmutziger, lustvoller Euro-Ho-Schmutzhändler

schmutziger, lustvoller Euro-Ho-Schmutzhändler

Talk about Out of the Past starring Robert Mitchum, Kirk Douglas and Jane Greer I got an unexpected phone call from someone I haven´t spoken to in over two decades. Normally I never answer my phone when its a telephone number that doesn´t come with a name attached, but for some reason I decided to pick up the line. I´m not a very spontaneous person though it may appear to be that I am, because of my performance work. I don´t talk to that many people on the mobile phone as most these days prefer texting, but I do have a few friends that are regular phone pals and you can count them on one ungloved sequin hand.

So imagine my chagrin when the person on the other end of the phone is the famed television actress and pop culture icon Heather Locklear. Heather and I started college together at UCLA, I won`t tell you the year, I´ll just say it was a very long time ago. I also worked for ten years at UCLA´s Placement and Career Planning Center where Heather`s father Bill Locklear was the center director, so he was my boss. Heather would alway drop by the Placement Center when she was on campus filming segments of her nightime TV soap opera Melrose Place. They would always film in the Sculpture Garden which was the opposite end of campus from the Placement Center. Heather would come by to say hi to her father and sometimes I would run into her and we`d chittle chat. Heather was always a good time Sally who loved to laugh and party and just have an all around fanciful time. Back during our university days we´d go dancing with a big group to tired Dillons Disco in Westwood Village or go to Hollywood to Seven Seas where Dayle Gloria was the DJane or Osco`s on Monday Night when Rodney on the ROQ would DJ. Osco`s was where they filmed the Donna Summer disco movie Thank God It´s Friday. We´d also go to the Rainbow Room and The Roxy on the Sunset Strip and The Oddyssy at Beverly Blvd and LaCienega, its sister location Phases in the Valley, Flipper`s Roller Disco, Gino´s II at Santa Monica Blvd and Vine Street and the Sugar Shack in North Hollywood which changed its name to something I don`t remember now. There was also a disco in Santa Monica that we frequented that was trendy for a moment, and an underground hangout near the beach that had the nutty name of The Mirror-Go-Round. I think we also went once or twice to this Black club called The Bit-n-Apple that was on Wilshire Blvd near San Vicente in an office tower. This particular club was frequented by this flashy group of Black men that were part of the 280Z Club because they all drove this sporty Datsun automobile and would hang out at Fatburgers on San Vicente Blvd & Burton Way. One of the girls in our group was this wild white girl named Judy Brooks who only dated Black men. Judy drove a cute MG convertible and was so much fun to be around. We had worked together back when I was in high school at Equifax in Santa Monica and was already a junior at UCLA when I started there. Judy was a Jewish princess who lived in Cheviot Hills with her parents, and she had an older brother who had dark curly hair and such a hot muscular body. I was totally in love with her hot brother, but I was invisible to him. Judy´s brother looked just like the actor Steven Guttenberg in the movie The Chicken Chronicles. By the way Steven Guttenberg was also a student at UCLA while I was there as well, and he would zip about campus in the the most revealing Dolphin shorts where you could see perfectly his impeccable circumcision. The actor Tim Robbins was also a student at UCLA who was in my playwriting class that was taught by Oscar Saul, who adapted A Streetcar Named Desire to the screen. Mr. Saul was such a nice man who ate breakfast every morning at this Googie style diner that was on Wilshire and Westwood Blvd.

But getting back to Heather Locklear. I asked her how did she get my mobile phone number? She said she got it from a friend we both knew who worked in casting, who was close with the late great DJ Henry Peck. This person didn´t have my telephone number but only had to make one call to get it.

Heather and I talked for an hour. I guess she was feeling nostalgic about her past. I didnt know the poor girl had been going through such a rough time. I told her she needs to get out of Southern California and Hollywood. She agreed but I doubt she will. She texted me a photo from when we all use to go out in these huge group of friends from school. I won´t share the photo as I look horrible in it. Heather and I are the same age and her daughter Ava Sambora that she had with guitarist Richie Sambora is now 27 years old. It makes me feel ancient. Heather´s father Bill Locklear looks just like Heather with the same kind eyes. He was the nicest boss I have ever had. I hated when he retired because that kind of signaled that my days were numbered working at UCLA. A group of co-workers who had always resented my autonomy conspired to get rid of me. At one point they made a complaint that I wore bedroom slippers to work. How absurd is that? Let´s face it I was just too weird to work at that University and I´m surprised I lasted as long as I did.

The heydey of Osco`s Disco.

The Locklear Family-Diane, Heather and Bill