THE ERASURE OF MEMORY
Of course summer is raging, and i'm sticky hot and uncomfortable. Mr. Uncertain bid Bricktops a hearty farewell with a striking performance assisted and conceived by La Poubelle Twins. The did a reverse strip from Hip Hop Summer School Sessioneers to Rooftop at the Wintergarden. Creekbird was our featured performer and he put on a marvelous show with his pals. That Creek sure has a nice white body.
Lots of celebutants in the audience. The lovely and ultra talented Claudia Gonson of the Magnetic Fields in town with the entire group performing at the Wilshire Ebell Theatre. The MFs are the first pop group to ever perform at the famed Hancock Park theatre. Their show was resplendid. Stephin was having problems with his ear, but seemed to be in a congenial mood and was very playfull on stage and with the audience in between admonishing them. Claudia and Stephin were in fine voice and i'm in love with their guitar and cello player. Ms. Gonson's escort to Bricktops was Steve Gregoropolus.
It was also a delight to have the great legend Penny Arcade in the audience, Penny reconnected with the gorgeous sophisticate and jewelry designer Hilary Bean, who came with Doug Gorden and Tommy Gear of the Screamers. Duncan of the Acres stopped by along with Michael Lucid, The Ditty Bops, Bibbe Hansen,choreographer Jean Spinosa, David J, Dr. Jose Munoz, Shari Frilot of Sundance Film Festival, Kirsten of Outfest and actress Lori Petty(Tank Girl)with her painfully unattractive girlfriend.

My sweet power publicist friend John Vlautin brought songwriter Desmond Child, producer Davitt Sigerson and mogul Hooman Majd. Of course there were tons of other celebrities but these are the ones that made themselves known to me. The guy that usually gives me the celebrity report on who was at the club hasn't emailed me a lick of gossip and its Monday, maybe he's out of town.

Saturday i went to the DGA for the panel discusion on The Death of Queer Art. With the legendary literary figurine John Rechy, Eve Oishi, Shari Frilot, Dr. Munoz and Judy LaBruce. "Twee" Stephen was the moderator and was really being a control queen with it. I guess he's becoming more aggressive. Judy and i along with Mike Wilde went to get a bite at Greenblatts, then i hung out at Sunset Five cruising beauties and waited at the DGA for Anderson Cooper. Ran into Ricky Castro and Miss Lauren Nurse Pain. Great seeing Miss Lauren. She is one of our famed beauties. Ricky was surprisingly being light and airy, and not his usual darktrodden self.

***

Had a power breaky with Doug Gorden at Cafe Figaro that was enchanting. Then i helped him with his revolutionary war furniture that he's selling to Butterfields. Had a power lunch at PDC with cute bubble butt academe Rob Sumners who has the photographer beau with a 12 inch and counting penis. Lovely time.

CAPO DI TUTTI I CAPI
Loving the Outfest Standard Hotel Breaky panels. Yesterday featured agents, managers and entertainment lawyers and today it was Women in Film, which started off very awkwardly, but then turned into the best of the panel discussions. Yep it rocked.

Was formally introduced to Rodney Evans the director of Bros. to Bros. He seems like quite a nice chap, and told me he has even been to Bricktops.

Last night saw the film Sugar, based on Bruce La Bruce's short stories from JD's. Director John Palmer is a theatre queen responsible for introducing to the world a young Keanu Reeves, back when he was little more then a Toronto hustler. Sugar really captured the BLAB stories, and the costumes and art direction were incredible, the behind the scenes people really had their excrement together in a way that you never see in American movies dealing with contemporary stories and Brendan Fehr is the new Rodney Harvey, but needs to be seen and not heard. Like most actors he isn't very articulate and that became evident during the Q&A.

Wednesday i saw Wild Side by Sebastien Lifshitz. I wish i was that lucky tranny involved in a hot buttery threegy with a smoldering Rusky and a tight chested Algerian boy. Yummy. Walk on Water from Israeli director Eytan Fox was also brilliantina. It was wonderful seeing Berlin on the silver screen in all its dreary beauty plus a cameo by drag queen Biggy Von Blonde.

Ran into qute "Twee" Michael Dykes at the soiree in the Atrium of the DGA. He's replaced his young humpy Brazilian sex pod for an Argentinian. Get it Twee. He also told me that Bill Silva is going to buy some property in Buenos Aires.

DAS FENSTER ZUM FLUR
Went to Outfest screening of "Harry & Max" which is based on the incesteous brotherly relationship of pop stars Nick and Aaron Carter. Love the cute leads, plus Michele Phillips and the always amazing Rain Phoenix. Too bad the story kindof fell apart at the end.

Stephen Fry's "Bright Young Things" is an adaptation of Evelyn Waugh's "Vile Bodies" and this should have been the opening night movie. What a joyous romp. Ran into sexy Shannon Kelly and his famous beau Pat McGuinn(son of Roger McGuinn of The Byrds) Rode autobus home with cute sassafras film critic Ernest Hardy.

Tuesday morn went to Standard Hotel Breaky. Was a joy talking to Cooper of Sundance Film Festival. I'll always remember his Allan Carr Caftan Room at the first Platypus. He made really strong vodka martinis. Cooper tells me that gorgeous Trevor is married and is the director of the Las Vegas Film Festival. A film festival in Vegas? Trevor should have married me.

The Bros. to Bros film was wonderful. I loved the portrayal of Langston Hughes, Zora Neal Hurston and the rest of the Harlem Renaissance Niggeratis. The after party in the atrium boasted some good ole soul foodd-friend chickenetta and collard greenbacks. Yummy


Saw "The Graffitti Artist" The two skater boi's really plahyed a number on me. The director certainly captured that mileau.

Wed breaky at the Standard. The panel discussion was all about TV. Very illuminating. Michael Lucid of the Pretty Things was on hand and also legendary Penny Arcade.

A'BOUT DE SOUFFLE
Tired gay Village for screening of Pretty Things starring Michael Lucid and DeManda of the Ditty Bops. Of course i arrived late, as Hollywood Blvd was going through one of its regular shutdowns because of a premiere at the Chinese Theatre for the new Hilary Duff film. My autobus was crawling down the blvd so i got off and walked to le Village. Funny didn't see the Ninja black ghetto dagger security force on hand. Amazing seeing Pretty Things with a large appreciative audience. Walked down to LaBrea to the olde Gorden Theatre which is now The Showcase to see Noah's Arc. The "folks" are all in full force and they make the screening hop. Poor lil "Twee" was introducing with that squeeky voice of his---he is so cute, and still very Harvard commons. Noah's Arc is a TV pilot that is written and directed by the same black man who also directed the awful PUNKS. I was expecting the worse but was pleasantly surprised. Of course the audience was the real show, talking back to the screen and drowning out dialogue it was like the reincarnation of The World Theatre on Hollywood Blvd back in 1978. Remember those days? The gay peckerwoods didn't know what to make of it all, the black and blatino scene that this show draws from is a world so removed from them. Its definately representing. They need to keep the focus gritty and not try to include every representative of black culture which would be pointless and twitty. In all i certainly found it a refreshing twist to the usual Outfest snoratia. As i said before leave it to the folks.

And one more thing: what a yummy cast juba jeliciousness. Two sleek D'Angelo coffee leads, a sassy sway back queen, a lusty spookapino and even a humpster blue eyed octaroon thrown in for good measure. Coulo

Summer in all its betty manifestations is finally upon us. june gloom has dissipated and well, i'd better get use to my sufferette

***

Hector and Erikla hosted me and Meesh of the Epiladies a nice counry Mexicali breakfast at their Maltman Hill Estate. Nice catching up on the can with my girls.

Dr. Munoz and his co curator Kevin picked me up from the studio to make our Platinum screening at Redcat. The films were a marvel. Just a sweet and whimsical program. of course i got mega drunk and disorderly in a Van Vechtan way and was mistreated all my Fanias. Shari of Sundance hosted an impromptu after party on SanBorne and we kleeked away in libation till 3am. Shracks!

VANESTRI

Went to the opening party of Outfest at the Orpheum. My was i surprised by how organized it was. There was plenty of food, easy to get to, and the bar wasn't a mess either, no long tedious lines. I was able to righteously get my drink on. They really got their act together, i was expecting the jagerworst.

The opening nite movie D.E.B.S. was cute and fluffy with lots of attractive kids in it. I especially love that model Devon Aoki, she was so bad in her acting that she came across as good. Miss Kirsten, the head programmer looked amazing in her debutante ball gown. I sat with Crepe Suzette, Cynthia and her friends in the box seats in the balcony. Had a nice drunken time, almost connected with a juicy ginger. Too bad I'm not a sexual predator.

LAST TANGO IN FERRIS
Marlon Brando died age 80. Boy was he able to fill out a toga in Julius Ceasar(1953)and a torn T-shirt, Streetcar Named Desire (1951) I even liked his singing and dancing in Guys&Dolls(1955) His best movies are One Eyed Jacks,(1961) and Burn (1969). And yes he was amazing in that Johnny Depp film the name of which i can't remember, something with DeMarco in the title, oh and he seemed to be having a good time in The Score with that tired, hauty Edward Norton.

Went to see the musical "DeLovely" about Cole Porter. The 1940s biopic starring Cary Grant as Porter is better, not much better but still. . . A more fitting name for this picture is "DeLame" Hollywood just can't make musicals anymore. And don't tell me about Chicago. It was cute, but not that good. Poor Ashley Judd, braving through it the best she can. The 40s version of the Porter tale was gayer then this sad flick. I was laughing out loud at Kevin Kline and his ballet dancer Russian lover and that gay bar was more like the current location of Numbers.

***

My hunky latin lover Cesar brought me a wonderful storage unit on wheels and some office chairs for my studio. I feel all shiny and new, thank you darling Cesar.

HAPPY PEOPLE OF THE WORLD

Wednesday Hector and Erikla cooked a fantasticle din din then took me to the Last Remaining Seats/Cinematheqa screening of Delores Del Rio in "La Otra" at the downtown movie palace, The Orpheum. Some dullard politicos made some speeches, but a highlight of the eve was a performance by Mulholland Drive diva Rebekeh Del Rio, stunning in white summer fox fur.

Friday at Bricktops the rampage was on with a delightful performance by Mark Simon and his Boyfriend troupe. They completely dazzled via the Carl Van Vechten buffet flat theme. Mike Bolger of Los Super Elegantes fame accompanied them on accordian and baby tuba.

It was wonderous seeing Heather and the Toxic Titties Collective en masse, plus Jean Spinosa, William Blakish poet Remy Matin and his wilde charleston strutting filmmaker bud Zebediah, who i've been mistakenly naming Jedediah, Dr. Larin, the handsome proper butch who was flirting away in the DJ booth with Bernice Bobs-Her-Hair,cute baby dyke Madeline, visiting filmmaking royal Olivier Hascout, actor Paddy Considine (In America) and Boyd Rice and his Death in June brigade.

Hung out the other day with Glen Meadmore. He took me to see the film "Father and Son" by Russian director Alexander Sokurov who also made the film "Russian Ark" which i loved. This pic tells the story of a hot father and son incestous couple played by Andrey Schetinin and Aleskey Neymyshev. The movie is one of the most romantic films i've ever seen. When this juicy pair aren't plowing, they stare intensely into each others eyes picking at their sex laden molecules. When the blondine son joins the army his buddies even want to get in on the action that he's receiving from dad. His jealous best friend and next door neighbor wants to move in for a buttery threegy with triple dicking---Who can blame him?

***

Qtrpounder Christine Pelisek of the LA Weekly, took me to a power bitch lunch at the Hollywood Roosevelt. They've redone the place and made it all piss eleganza.

Bricktops was a Cecil B. DeMille Extravaganza with Abby Travis performing accompanied by Kristian Hoffman. Abby looked divine as "Madame Satan". She always puts on a masterful show. The Abby Travis fanclub included french actors Je're'mie Elkaim(La' Cause d'un garcon)with Arielle Dombasle the wife of philosopher king Bernard-Henry Levy. Is Arielle having an affair with young Mr. Elkaim? Hmmmmm. Designer Michael Schmidt who made Abby's jeweled mask, Don Spiro and Augusta, Miss Morgan Olsen,celebrity photographer Kevin Abosch, lean sex machine Mario Diaz, the gay club kingpin and goth legendina David J.

Also in attendance Mr. Bruce "Judy" LaBruce who was on a stopover heading to Australia to show "Raspberry Reich" he'll be back in Los Ang for the movie's premire at Outfest, and the after party will be at Bricky's on July 16th. Judy was holding court with Javier Peres of the smoldering Peres Projects Gallery, dj Glen Masculine with beau St'Eve "Harrington" Hall. Dykon Gwen Turner with new black lady love Yolanda Lawrence of TV's "Line of Fire" I was involved with a little bit of smooching in the DJ booth with that fine English actor Ioan Gruffudd who is in that lame new Jerry Brockheimer playstation retelling of "King Arthur" I'm such the anglophile.

earlier in the week Daddy Athey cooked a feast for me and Judy LaBruce at his silverlake compound. I love it when Papa makes me a meal.

Saturday i escaped for a holiday retreat to Laguna Beach with one of my sweet young admirers, Jason North. Had a wondeful time. It felt incredible to get away from it all and do nothing during the holiday weekend. Ran into a former date of mine who now works up North for George Lucas.

***

Hosted the UnHappy Hour with a fine array of readers that included Keith Niles(Undergroundvoices.com) Sierra Sky of the zine Constallation, Brenda Martinez (Toe Dancing and Frenzied Circles) The featured readers were Alvin Orloff from San Francisco, who founded the art collective The PopStitutes and has two fantastic books out "Gutterboy" and "I Married an Earthling" and spoken word diva Jennifer Blowdryer of the White Trash Debutantes and Persiflage literary journal. Jennifer and Alvin are old pros, who really know how to command the stage. I'll never forget Alvin's giant penis one night at Tehoma sex club back in the early 90s. I was wanking him and didn't realize i was committing incest with a good girlfriend. Lady Bunny was also there that night, thank god i didn't accidentally doodle with her, too.
Jennifer performed as part of the Six Sex Weeks in Hamburg, Germany in 1996, with her Smut Fest show. I had a week run during that festival with my "intimacy and Tommorrow, subtitle: stupidity, today" piece.

That Ms. Blowdryer is the only one who can get away with picking a thread on stage for a good 5 minutes or spreading lip stick on a microphone then applying it to her lips, when she belts out a song in the grand tradition. Wowzina!

earlier in the day had a power bitch lunch with Cesar Vega. I just may do this short film called "Beyond Lovely" written by Cesar's friend Hilary Goldberg. I hate film scripts, but this one had me laughing out loud.

LES RIVIE'RES POUPRES

Saw the new Wayan Bros. comedy "White Chicks" found it actually a bit subversive, though i doubt if that was the filmmakers intent. "White Chicks" isn't brilliant like Tom Green's "freddy Gets fingered" but there were some cute elements of physical Harry Langdonesque comic manuevers that made me chuckle slightly. The two leads are attractive young men who could one day develop into top notch talent, but they have a long way to go at present.

What fascinated me was the so black he's blue pro-footballer "snow" queen---whose antics obviously are rooted in same sex desire for white men.
this "snow" queen drinks a spiked cocktail and mimicks the shirtless circuit boy 'meth' speaker hugging and flag twirling set in one vignette only to awaken in the arms of a beady eyed blondine surfer villain.

the overall tone of the movie is erratic in that grievous manner so prevalent in mainstream product, but the elder Wayan Bros.-- Keenan Ivory, the director, must be acknowledge for revealing so openly and without guile his homo panic and homo laced misogony in the treatment of the female black leads. His boldness in this regard is utterly disturbing.

I've never seen any of Wayan's other releases, but now i'm curious if this is a re-occuring thread in his talking piture ouvre. And to think i just wanted to see a hollywood guilty pleasure matinee.

***

Marcu' Siegel my Cheap Jewelry regie' from Berlin came to Los Ang for a sweet visit. David Pendleton of UCLA's Film and TV archive hosted a gala cocktail party for Marcu', that was a silverlake smashina. Lots of charming academes and uber intellects on hand for a raucaus Monday eve.

i filmed the second part of my Technova video in Valencia with Cyril and Jimothy overseeing the production. I really adore Jimothy. he's a spritely ginger headed boy who grew up on the wrong side of the Illinois train tracks. He's my working class hero, with the best energy surrounding him.

The boys later dropped me off at Dave Harrow's compound in the Solano Canyon section of Chavis Ravine next to Dodger Stadium. Cyril lives up the hill, and Jimothy down the sreet from Dave. There are a bunch of American and Euro artists living in the canyon, so its become this tasty boho enclave.

I laid down some lyrics on some new tracts that Dave composed in his new studio that was built by the same guy who created Prince's home recording palace in Minneapolis. The Technova album "Electrosexual" is supposed to be released in this country in August. Who knows if that will actually happen or not. The record is already out in Europe.

I'm such a control queen that its difficult for me to get excited about a project that i only contribute lyrics to. I need to create the melody as well, and sing the words not speak them. I know i'm not a singer, but that doesn't really matter. I have an original voice and with proper tweaking in the studio it can be made to sound incredible.

Dave is a talented musician and arranger, so if i came up with melodies and he re-worked them using his technical wizardry we could actually have a collab that has a little bit more meat and grind to it. oh welp, its not like I really want a career in music as a pop star, that would be lame.

In all honesty i hate performing, i'd rather be behind the scenes, nurturing and discovering new young talent, and perhaps writing material for up-and-coming youngsters.

ERDGEIST

June 11th Larry Bob came down to LA to perform with his combo Larry, Hall and Jack at Bricktops. They looked amazing wearing cute matching college seaters and knickers. Just adorable. The theme was Lorenz Hart and their group features Jack Curtis on vocals and Hall Hall playing trombone. I wish Larry could have spent more time down in Los Ang just hanging out with la diva, but he had other committments.

One of my old time pals the poet Tim Donnelly who lives in Berkeley, came to see Larry's group. Tim brought his baby brother.

Saw that English movie The Mother where this granny bopper starts to get it on with her daughters young lover. I loved the scene when the hunky younger man starts getting all hustler mean on her, and she's just cowering right next to his giant peterfication. Boy did that pull a cord. Us gals will go to whatever lengths to be able to chug on a nice full lug.

The Ditty Bops and Michael Lucid came by the studio for a visit. So great having them all. I just love mentoring young talents. Did a guest performance at Largo with the Ditty Bops on Thursday June 17th. Hadn't been to Largo since the mid 90s. I use to be a fixture on that stage, but the place kind of became this industry hub and i stopped hanging out east of Western so we lost touch, but the owner Flannagan and the sound guy both remembered me so it was a nice reunion.

June 18th and another Bay area visitor to Bricktops. This time song stylist and storyteller Jill Tracy. Jill is a great talent and captivated the audience with her moody pieces. I loved her quiet, sophisticated presence, so unlike other San Francisco performers who sometimes come across as shrill. Jill has an English husband who i found very sexy in a Daniel Craig kind of way.

The celebutants in the house included Samuel Frenchs Mark Simon, UCLA'S film and TV archive programmer David Pendleton, Marcu Siegel visiting all the way from east Berlin, director Roland Joffe and his wife, Mean Mommy of the Cheap Beer Club, Steak of Steakhause Productions, the beautiful Pigpen Myers Rifkin, poet Remy Matin, choreographer cutie Jean Spinosa and filmmaker Jedidiah. Bibbe Hansen and Sean Carrillo came by with Jake Gyllenhaul and Kirsten Dunst. I was so glad to meet Jake. I adore him. His sister Maggie has been coming to Bricktops a lot, but i was wondering when Jake would show up. Thank you Bibbe for bringing to me the boy of my dreams.

I started filming some videos for my new Technova project with Cyril and Jim. We had a lovely time romping through the subway system, kutting up in Hancock Park and in my studio. We're going to film some more on Tuesday and Wednesday in Valencia. Can't wait.

Lenny and Andrew of the Parlour club took me to dinner at Tantra in Silverlake. This trendy Indian restaurant use to be the Olio Theatre where i had great successes with The Afro Sisters back in the 80s. Was really weird being in that space as it is now. The food at Tantra was surprisingly good and so was the ambiance. I was expecting it to be really icky the way Silverlake is starting to become, but i was taken aback.

SLAVEN CREVE

I've been a very naughty girl of late and haven't been writing down all my missadventures for all the fans in my fandom. I've been ever so fraught with a bunch of power bitch meetings with all these people pitching me projects that they want me to be involved in. Every day i get 10 more emugs and phone calls. I'm not going to go into any detail, because its just all too too much.

Bricktops has been very juicy of late. The Ditty Bops finished up their residency with a big bang theory performance where they turned the place inside out as an underwater grotto. What an enchanting evening. I had a blast flirting with all the cutie butt pies and dimple danggers. The Bops are destined for hugeness.

The parade of admirers included Laura Michelchynshyn, head of Showcase Television in Canada and Jeremy Padeswa the director of HBO's Carnival also Cyril Kuhn who co-directed my erotic silent film "Wo Ist Manfred" and his pretty artist wife Karen Lofgren plus some of the C-Level art collective, Javier Peres of Peres Projects Gallery and those bubbly humpy dork Herbst Twins. The Bricktops regulars were in full force: Bibbe Hansen and Sean Carrillo, Shauna Leone, Don Spiro and Augusta.

Last Friday was our Gershwin Rhapsody in Blue nite, helping me DJ was special guest spinmeister Audre Beardsley of Clapton Pond and performances by Mr. Uncertains jazz band Uncertain which features Austin Texas on bass, Sid Arthur on guitar and hunky beauty boy Kenneth Thunder on drums. Bibbe brought adorable Jack Dishell the guitarist with NYC's Moldy Peaches and Sundance head programmer Shari Frilot came with Thomas Allen Harris the filmmaker and academic brother of Lyle Ashton Harris.
Madame Bricktops sang a song about not liking little men with little hands and little feet and also did a cover of the Franz Ferdinand song, "Jacqueline" embarrasing the boys of the band who were trying to drink some pints in peace. They seemed to like Bricktops version of their song which was one damn alcoholican rendition. The boys from Franz Ferdinand got into a little bit of a shouting match with muscular pro-beach volleyball players Jason Ring and George Roumain, who were a little stymied by the well dressed crowd. Word to Jason and George-----flip flops and shorts should only be worn at the beach fellas.

The Lady Ms. Davis saw a bunch of movies, the Yves St. Laurent documentaries, Saved, The Day Before and After Tomorrow and Harry Potter. The fashion docs were the best. Not even cute Jake Gyllenhaul could redeem the disaster flick, that wasn't Armagedony enuf and while Alfonso Cuaron does infuse the Potter film with a bit more edge, it still comes off a little flat.

my English husband Andrew of Gould's wife Charity Hope Valentine is back in Los Angeles. I've missed her, its great having her back in the gritty.

YAMINA BACHIR-CHOUIKH RACHIDA
The week that went. Robert Coddington the sound designer with H-Gun of Chicago who now lives here in LA came by the studio for a long visit and luncheon break. We had a lovely time reminscing about the old fun days in the Blindy Citi, yes Chieta was a town that was very good to me whenever i came through on tour in the 90s.

Mar'Lou De Luna and her hubby Hal Marinas took me to a radu din din at Cafe Du Village in Larchmont. I always have a phun time with them. I've known Marlou since the 4th grade when she was fresh off the boat from the philipines. Now she is a success lawyer working for the State of Cali and has a giant house in the La Canada/Flintridge Hills.

Professor Jennifer Doyle had a bon voyage party at her Silverlake compound. Nice little gathering. She cooked some amazing vittles and mixed wine spritzers that were very refreshing. She's off for Montepelier, France and won't be back to August. I'm going to miss that sweet smile and jewel of a personality.

Visited with my hot Aztecan Cesar Vega at his office at the old CFI Complex in the middle of Hollywood Proper. He took me to lunch at this industry hang called Grub. The food was fantastic and the owner a colorfull character with lots of charm and spunk. Later in the evening i had a movie nite with Andrew of Gould. We saw the latest segment of Pretty Things that dimunitive Michael and Amanda of the Ditty Bops produce. Its hilarious. I love the last vignette with a trendy Asian girl called "Fashion Victim" These kids are talended!

Had a power lunch at the Pacific Dining Car with Joel Lipman, The VP of Development and Rick Scott, the President of Autonomy a design firm in Hollywood that is branching out into production. They want to do a TV show with me where I can do anything i want. Little do they know what that would entail.

JEUX D'ENFANTS

My new sexy caucasion husband is celebrity photographer Kevin Abosch. I wonder where we're going to go on our honeymoon? Capri? St. Moritz? I'm so thankful to the Ditty Bops for introducing me to the perfect man.

The Ditty Bops performed at Bricktops as part of their May residency, to the delicious theme: "They're Wearing Them Higher in Hawaii" Amanda, Abby and their gang of sweet talented boys are the most amazing act that Los Angeles has ever seen or will see. I'm so fortunate that I get to showcase them at my little speakeasy. Soon they are going to be HUGE stars.

Lots of dignataries came out to pay homage to The Bops: Cute Gallic actor, Guillaume Canet of the new film "Love Me If You Dare" and his Belgian director Yann Samuel, who is very ugly. Mr. Samuel was putting the mack daddy moves on me, but i wasn't ready to receive them.
It was great hanging out with rock legend Rebecca Tucker Sevrin of Fright Wig fame and her good time sally girlfriend, also the dynamic Donita Sparks of L7 who came by with songbird Abbie Travis and Miss Exotic World Kitten DeVille,joined by a bevy of Bollywood Follies Beauties. I also got to chittle chat with archivist/videographer Robert Coddington and writer Joel, experimental filmmaker Thomas Gabela, Steak of Steakhause Productions and the great and glorious vision of true loveliness Miss Mink Stole, looking young and chic.

ST SOFIA

Forgot to write down that director Darren Stein of Jawbreaker fame took me to a delicious lunch at that cute greek restaurant at Normandie and Pico in what use to be LA's Greek district. Remember the Greeks invented homosexuality back in 1437. Darren is a very good looking Princess of Judea. Darren is going to be directing a gay romantic comedy written by my old pal Craig Chessler.
It was nice being able to hang out with Darren and have a sweet conversation outside of a crowded niteclub or party atmosphere.

PLUMKIN PARK

Cute New York Times photographer Jamie Rector took my picture riding my bike on Hollywood Blvd near my apartment. I hope they use the shots of me under the Music Box Theatre Marquee which read something like: Hollywood's Most Talented Women Awards what a hoot that would be.

Met with style editor Guy Trebay of the New York Times at Andrew of Gould's compound. Andrew cooked some snax and a bunch of the cute kids came by for a little pre-Bricky boozecanning. I adore that Markie Mag and his Suburbia Stable of bubble butt boys. He brought along some fine specimens: Matt, Jovin and Spense. Spense is going to be my bathtub gin baby-sweet. Immanuel Martin de la Felaise is back from Japan and is wearing an authentic dough boy uniform from the war to end all wars. He also has his 20s typewriter, chair and table where he will do the installation "Letters from an Unknown Soldier" Our special musical guests will be Robbie D and Squeeky Blonde aka: Tony performing a selection from their Telekensis show.

Cuddly crowd came to the club this friday including that sultry mulatto son of Edgar Bronfman Jr. named Ben Brewer who kept staring at me like he didn't believe i existed. Well i do Blanche, i do. This Brewer kid looks like a younger version of Lenny Kravitz. He has this band called The Exit that have been getting a lot of notice. I noticed his cute piece of snow bandmate named Jeff DaRosa. I'd like to munch on his darosa. The lovely designer of my 20s frocks Miss Morgan Olsen came by with her pretty beau. Its going to be fun having her hanging out at the club now that she's graduated from Otis Parson.

Saturday i spend with Immanuel. Was supposed to take Guy Trebay on a Ms Davis style bike tour, buts its way too hot for that. Sunday Guy comes by the studio and we have a lovely chat that goes on for hours, but seems like minutes. Is always a pleasure being around a great mind.

Tuesday in Belgium and Jeffreyland Hilbert takes me shopping for a new desk for the studio. That Jeffreyland he always comes to my lady rescue. I'm so delighted to report that my studio has a radiant fresh new look. Its a wonder what a new piece of furniture can do. I am one happy clam.

GOJIRA

Saw that little movie masterpiece The Mudge Boy starring an amazing Emile Hirsch and juicemonger Thomas Guiry. Wow! The swelling desire between these two lads is exhilerating, and when its unleased in the brutal, giddy abandon of forcefull sodomy, whew. . .its all in the eyes and the two young actors sure have appealing hairy eyeballs.

The only sour note is that i had to take the autobus all the way to tired West LA to see this film.

FIERY SPORTS SIP

Now i know nothing about sports, but i have some sports insiders who feed me items and in my formal column a ways back i wrote how Shaq O'Neill of the Lakers was down low-ding his snow boyfriends and how one of his former teammates, a cornfed hunkydorfus named Mark Masden was traded after their affair ended, well I'm hearing that Mr. Controversial himself Koby "I speak fluent Italian" Bryant could not have raped that girl in Colorado. Yes he actually had consentual sex with her just to appease the basketball groupie so she wouldn't badmouth him as being gayish when he initially turned her down and she made that strident implication. It seems lil cutie pie Koby has been way on the down-how-low-can-you-go seeing Sacramento Kings rising star Peja Stojakovic, and before Peja he was with a Russian teammate who was so crushed by their amouris breakis that he wanted to return to the Ukraine.

Now thats gossipal twuths with a capital "WEE".

LE TENTAZIONI DEL DOTTOR ANTONIO

Had my smoldering date with Frankfurt lothario Marcuse. He met me at my studio and the boys headlights knocked me out. Before i knew it i was on the floor convulsing like Glenda Jackson in the Ken Russell film "The Music Lovers" Our connection is unbelievable.

I took him to eat at the Kitchen, and both of us were starving. Thats the natural effect from high toned macking. What a beauty he is, and i can't believe he's fargone on "the doll". Lucky for me i met him before he became 'passed around patty'. He's only been in Los Angeles since January, lives in Westwood with his twin brother who is a professor at UCLA. Ah Spring.

Monday Morn had breakfast at Patty Powers spacious flat in Echo Parqay.
Patty made pancakes, veggie sausages, korkler eggs and fruit salad. Just perfect. I'm going to have Patty workshop her new monologues at Bricky's in July. It will be billed as "Five Minute Fireside Chats with Patty Powers, channeling the restless voice of Alice B. Toklas if Gertrude Stein had let her talk.

Talked to the gorgeous costume designer Crepe Suzette Mathelson who is back from filming the movie "Friday Night Lights in west Texas. The flick stars Billy Bob Thorten and Tim McGraw and is directed by Peter Berg. Its a high school football movie and also features beautiful young male ingenues: Jay Hernandez, and Garrett Hedlund.

PROVA D'ORCHESTRA

Received my weekly emug from the well connected industry insider who comes to Bricktops every week and then sends me a recap of who came that was famous. He usually sends the missive Friday nite when he gets home at 2:30am, but i didn't get it this week until Sunday morn at my studio.

I usually didn't recognize any of these people myself, since i'm hosting, DJ-ing and performing, i'm a little pre-occupied most Fridays.

Here's the list: actor Marc Ruffalo and wife Sunrise Coigney, Saffron Burrows, Patrick Fugit and Tony Leung Chiu-Wai. The first name i recognize from several recent films, i wish i had noticed him. He's really good looking in a dark and smoldering way. Loved when he danced in his underwear with Kirstin Dunst in the Jim Carrey movie "Spotless Mind" The other three i've never heard of. So thats that.

Saturday my good pal Anderson Cooper took me to the movies to see "The Saddest Song in the World" starring Isabella Rosellini, Marie deMeideros(Henry et June) and Mark McKinney(Kids in the Hall). What an amazing film, set in 1930s Winnipeg----Glen Meadmore country. I'm not going to tell you anything about it other then you must see it.

We ran into documetary film god Morgan Neville and his lovely wife Nettie of the fantastic country band, The Acres. Morgan is so patrician looking and handsome, with thick hands and feet, a WASP dreamboat---he must come from one of America's leading families of priveledge and commerce. You don't see superior genetics like that every day, let me tell you Sally!

Also ran into Iranian photog Pej and his sexy lover Paul Sibrizi of Famous Designs.

Anderson took me to eat at that cute Japanese restaurant we always go to in Little Tokyo.

Sunday morn ritual of getting the LA Times at the Cahuenga Newstand that is run by Diz E. McNally, the legendary LA personality and MC, who I've known for over 20 years. She is one of the cities most treasured originals with her multi-colored nailz and unique high pitched squeels.

LA VOCE DELLA LUNA

Professor Jennifer Doyle aka Pirate Jenny from Montepelier took me to eat dinner at Alegria, a cute latin restaurant in a mini-mall in Silver Lake near Millie’s. I hadn’t eaten at the place in years. There was a bit of a trendy crowd, and they’ve even hired some trendy people to work as waiting staff.
Incredible dinner, and the people in the dining room didn’t get on my nerves for a change. A bunch of really cute boys---low key and no tired cell phone queens thank gawd.

Professor Doyle wrote this great chapter in her new book about my performance as Vanessa Beecroft. Can’t wait till it comes out and the world gets to see it.

Went to Taylor’s Steakhouse in Koreatown to birthday soiree for writer Steven Mikulan of the LA Weekly. Steven is one of the smartest men in this Los Ang town, and his wife Sandra Ross is one of the sharpest ladies, not to mention she’s stunningly attractive. They are one of my top favorite couples. Got to hang out with the lovely madame fashion editrix Kateri Butler and the dynamic acting sensation and NEA Four member John Fleck, who looks sooo young and has the body of a teenage boy. I can’t believe he’s 53 years old.

Had to leave party early to meet Little Papa, Frank Rodriguez to go to Chico’s in Montebello. I’m writing a little article for this French fashion mag about Chico’s "Cockfight" male stripper nite, that features some hunky homeboy burlesque babes. My fav Chico’s boy Obregon wasn’t on duty, but there was this other one, who was short, stocky and looked like he was fresh out of the penitentiary-----yummy! Frank and I also needed to do some social studies work in preparing for our limo lap dancing club Knob Ill.

Hector made me a delicious dinner on Thursday, we were running a little behind schedule as I also had to do laundry. Wanted to go see Mr. Uncertain and Glen Meadmore’s Hot Horny and Born Again Cuntry band play at Zen Sushi, but we couldn’t make it.

Friday and Bricktops F.W. Marnau Nite. So many people ---the joint was packed. We screened Marnau’s "Faust" those images are amazing floating in the dark. The Ditty Bops theme was ‘Circus Maximus" and they pulled out all the stops. Those Ditty Bop girls are a wondermint. I love all their pals too, like their handsome staff photog who is a fiery Silver Fox beauty in the Richard Gere mode. Something tells me he is packing a nefarious cruel club----the kind that can open clams. This other young boy who was part of the performance, looked like a male ingenue of the highest order. He had taunt, tight little perky titties, I didn’t feel much of an ass though. And you know me, I am a major ass fienda from the olde school. I’ve got to have my fat bottom boys--they make the rockin world go round.

Nice to see regulars like photographer Don Spiro, who gave me some hot nudie pix of Louise Brooks for our upcoming Brooksie celebration on May 21st. Plus the poet Remy, who will be going to grad school in the bay area. He’s one of our best young 20s dancers. I’m going to miss his energy. Socialite Jean Spinosa also came by to trip the light fantastico. I chatted with film programmer extroidinaire Shannon Kelly, death rock legend David J. and this cute English actor Hugh Darcy who is in that movie "Ella Enchanted." I know there were some other celebs afoot, my spy who always tells me who is who, hasn’t emailed me his report yet. I never recognize anyone usually.

Oh I met this sexy Germany boy name Marcuse, I’m hoping to see him tomorrow for some good lovin’ and turtle dovin’ Keep your fallopian tubes crossed.

HOB GOBLIN

Here is a little letter from dear Lawrence Roberts, my most faithful of faithful followers and the mastermind behind my webpage and main archivist of all things Vaginal Davis, lore and mythology. He is vacationing in the east, as we like to say.

Hi Madame Doktor --

I am finally at a cyber cafe catching up on computer stuff,
and I will put up the May and June Bricktops calendars.

Here's what I've been up to.

The first two nights I spent in New York staying with Dickie Dworkin.(The famous feminists son)
The first night we went out to piano bars on Christopher Street --
the new yorkers singing made me wonder if San Franciscans still know
how to have fun. The next night I went to the Queercore Blitz shows --
this is a series of concerts on east coast cities, mostly lesbian bands,
with one band of three boys called the Dead Betties --
http://www.thedeadbetties.com/photos.html
Donna Dresch's new band Davies Vs. Dresch was also quite good,
and I like Gina Young with her political lyrics and varied musical
styles.

Then I took a bus to Washington DC (there were two eastern european girls
who were annoying the bus driver -- a big nelly black guy who had my
sympathy.) I'm staying with my college friend Juli and her husband John
and their red-headed three year old son -- they used to live in Reno, and
I haven't seen them since they moved and their son was born. They have
lesbian neighbors with a kid the same age and there's another lesbian
couple nearby -- Juli borrowed one couple's car to pick me up and the
other couple lets her use their computer -- very friendly.

Saturday night I went to Bob Mould's club night Blowoff (Bob was out sick
though -- hopefully he will be better before the marriage benefit concert
on the 28th in New York City). Sunday I went to the pro-choice march --
huge crowd -- they're estimating over a million. The queer contingient,
if there was one, wasn't very visible. Saw some radical cheerleaders and
so on. That night was the DC round of the Queercore Blitz show.

Today I spent the day at the Library of Congress (beautifully restored
recently) and got sheet music and played it on a Steinway Grand in a
soundproof room. Then I went to the Corcoran and looked at quilts, which
reminded me of a Karen Finley piece about how even quilts were found to be
obscene art because they had menstrual blood and semen stains on them.
(The Corcoran's the one that took down a Mapelthorpe show)

I went to Lambda Rising, which is much better stocked than A Different
Lite in SF, and got a book of comics about gay black men, a German lesbian
comic book in English , and a German magazine with pictures of Turkish bears.
One of them is even wearing a fez. This is stuff I've never seen in SF.

Tomorrow I plan on going to the Smithsonian, maybe even their archive
room, then head to New York on Wednesday.

Larry

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT IN AZBAKISTAN

Well the profile of yours truly came out today in Mz. LA Times. I can't believe it, I'm actually being recognized in my city of birth. That rarely happens. I love the piece it is very artfully written by Hilary McGreggor who spent a lot of time with me trying to delve into my nonsensical life. Hilary was actually the third writer who attempted to get me down in print at the Times. Janet Duckworth, the editor of the Calendar section also did an incredible job. The first approached me over a year ago, and now to see it is unbelievable. There was a time that the LA Times refused to print my name, it wasn't till after i was profiled in the New York Times that they relunctantly gave in. Well if you live long enough, people can't ignore you anymore.

I've already gotten a million emails and phone calls, Even though i'm self absorbed, i really don't like being recognized by strangers on the street, unless that stranger is cute and wants to have sex with me.

GORTH SHORE

Was shopping for birthday gifts for Andrew of Gould, and I notice that Academy Award winning actor Adrian Brody is stalking me AGAIN. Doesn’t he ever get tired of being a pest? My word, the man is cute, but he’s way too skinny and fragile for big boned lady me. Plus he has thin lips, and I only can kiss someone with full pouty lips like that young ingenue Michael Pitt from the Bertolucci film "The Dreamers"

Adrian even followed me into the tired Bank of America off of LaBrea and Melrose. I swear I’m getting a restraining order. I finally lost him when I ducked into the Chinese Theatre on Hollywood Blvd to see that teen flick "Mean Girls" I was a mean girl in high school, even though I was a freak, I was very popular, but by default, because I didn’t care that I was popular, and I made a point of befriending the most outcast of outcasts and re-making them into prized, guilded swans.

The movie Mean Girls wasn’t really mean enough. Lindsay Lohan is a likeable young lass, like me she has a full bosum. That poor Chabert girl, one of the co-stars, on certain angles she looks 45. All the boy actors were non-descript, though one caught my eye in a scene where he displayed lots of potatoey white breaded flesh.

CELINE FRION

My little jazz age party Bricktops, was effervecent. The theme was "Theda Bara" and one of my olde school girlfriends Europa performed her belly dancing majique. Miss Bricky also sang a song about Kobe Bryant and his Laker Medallion plus "No Thank You Please", from her twisted archive.
· I was really surprised to see Thom York of Radiohead. I guess he’s in town to play the Coachella Music Festival. He didn’t look like he was well, but sure drank a lot. He was with that brooding Brit actor Jonathan Rhys-Meyers(Velvet Goldmine) Maybe they’re gay lovers? Eek thats repugnant.
It was great seeing dycon Gwen Turner with her handsome new date, plus the gorgeous documentary filmmaker Augusta, who is always fetching. Miss Excotic World, the Regina of burlesque, Kitten DeVille put in a little appearance--she is vaudville royalty at its best plus that adorable gamine of a designing clotheshorse, Shauna Leone, and Joel Peter Witkin muse, The Goddess Bunny.

Thom actually came up to me in the DJ booth and said he loved my new Technova single "I Could Have Sex" that I collaborated on with Dave Harrow. I’ve been getting lots of emails from England, I guess the song is being played heavily on the mainstream radio stations there. The Album, "Electrosexual" doesn’t drops in a few weeks. I wonder how the single will be received in this country. Oh I’m sure it will be ignored like all my other musical projects. Lets face it, I wasn’t meant to be a pop star, certainly not at this ripe old age.

DUNCA DAVILLE

Heat wave, heat wave----the mortal enemy of all drag queens. The unseasonably cool spring has given way to summer death valley rays. Not good.
Bricktops was still a smash, with the warm temperatures. Anna Bells of the Fishnet Floozy's did a solo turn that was deliriously lovesexy. So many cute new kids at the club. Met a sweet black sister girlfriend visiting from Seattle---lovely lady with a vivacious and warm personality. Also saw a handsome brotherman, dancing the Charleston and This Mess-around---yummy.

An odd assortment of celebs came by ranging from supermodel Jenny Shimizu, cute boi writer Dave Eggers, British literary heavyweight Martin Amis, punkette Brody Dalle of the Distillers, plus Stella Schnabel with Paz de la Huerta. I just can't explain it so i wont. Regulars and semi-regulars included the delightful creative couple Don Spiro and filmaker Augusta!, juicy Shauna Leone, Dapper Dan, DJ Prickle, Ming Ma with cute new beau, singer Devendra Banhrt and Ed Simons of the Chemica Bros. (Are they a couple now? Sure were acting like one.

CILANTRO DEGUILE

Received this lovely emug from Tony Arena, aka: Anonymous Boy, the talent behind the sexy comic novels:

Hey Dr. Davis,

This is Anonymous Boy, writing to you in hopes that kind Gleeson will forward my email to you since I either do not have, or I cannot locate your current email address. Long time no see nor hear from. Hope you are doing well. I examine your blog regularly so I always feel like we're in touch...although it hit me today that we aren't really, since I'm only in touch with what YOU'RE up to and you have no idea what I'm doing or if I even am alive. Well I do live! Me and my honey Ron are doing fine although Ron is still unemployed due to the aftermath of the World Trade Center catastrophe. As you may recall, he worked at the building across the street and was under the 2nd Tower when those "Holy" warriors slammed their hijacked airline into it. Yes, it was years ago, but seems like yesterday to us New Yorkers who had to witness that flaming monstrosity with our naked eyes. There is a club in the vacinity of the fromer World Trade Center called The Knitting Factory and Ron and I went to see the incredible english punk band The Fall there recently. (The Fall are the last band from the class of English punk 1977 who are still standing...never broke up...never went on hiatus...never sold out...always continued to release records.) Anyway I was speaking to the guitarist Ben, whose been with them the last four or five years and he said to me The Fall will always come to NY because they respect the strength we showed after 9/11. In comparisan...when a little bomb went off in their home city of Manchester some years back-people were unable to function for a year. But NYC just picked itself up and went back to work. I thanked him and told him we respected The Fall's bravery, because The Fall were one of the only touring bands who had the balls come to NYC immediatley after the disaster and we never forgot that. They were the first band we saw after 9/11, and they came here with the ruins still being carted off and the fire department still trying to put out the flames. Every other touring band cancelled their NYC tour dates in fear! But not the Fall. Speaking of bravery...singer Mark E. Smith broke his leg and hip shortly before going on this current USA tour. Even though the doctors told him not to get on the plane, he came anyway and sang from the seated position and was helped on and off stage my his crutches and a stage hand. Now there's dedication for ya! So my point of this long missive is that Mark E. Smith of The Fall came across the sea with a broken leg and hip to perform for New Yorkers. If he can do that for us I have to ask when are YOU going to return? Our bleak city is bleaker without your "satanic grin."

Do you remember when you performed at Don Hill's and pulled down my underwear to put my genital organ on display for the crowd? This is something no other performer has dared to do before. Not even Mark E. Smith. See? You also have bravery. Therefore you must return here. Please do so soon.

In case you are wondering what I've been up to, Ron and I still do our public access TV show with our stuffed Polar Bear named Snuffles. Also, I still draw Anonymous Boy drawings and have my own monthly "Anonymous Boy" column in Maximum Rocknroll magazine where I mouth off about whatever the fuck I feel like. In addition, I've done a comic book story for the new edition of BoyTrouble for David Kelly and Robert Kirby.
http://www.davidkellystudio.com/bt.html It's a cute little story about gay punk boys in longing, as per usual. What else have I been up to? I recently bought a DVD of the movie "Suburbia" about your home town LA punk scene. I hadn't seen this film since it was in the theaters and I was a teenager about the same age as the kids in the movie. Watching that flick again revealed to me how terrible it actually is, something that must have gotten past my teen-boy eyes at the time. But perhaps you have some sort of strange affection for this atrocious movie so I'll refrain from attacking it further. But who knows? After all, how can any movie be considered even remotley "good" if it does not contain at least one cameo appearance by Dr. Davis herself?

I have a band now, but we do not have a name. All day long I come up with names for my band but I fail at choosing a good one. The Out To Lunch? Veal Bumpkin? The Grunts? Spinach Pie? Jean & Joan and a Who Knows Who? All terrible names. All the good names for bands have already been used up by you. Perhaps my little band is destined to be forever nameless. For this I blame you. Well anyway you are probably asking yourself what prompted the bizarre Mr. Anonymous Boy to write to your holiness? Well I'll tell you. I saw on your website that you went out dining with one "Anderson Cooper" and I wanted to know if this so-called "Anderson Cooper" was the same silver-haired fox on CNN. I'd heard rumors that Mr. Cooper was a homosexual od some sort and if that is true it only makes sense that he should be dining with you because what self-respecting homosexual can keep his sweaty mits off of you? Not me that's for sure. Oh V.D. you're so impressive. You know all the stars...largley because your a star yourself. I'm sure it's all you can do to fend off the Eve Harringtons climbing out to the woodwork. "Eve Evil. Little Miss Evil." "Ah Eve! The golden girl. The girl on the moon. Life has been good to Eve...." but I digress.

I've been a theater queen of late. I saw Larry Kramer's gay play The Normal Heart recently and was devestated. Last night I saw Caroline Or Change and was bowled over. There were several parts in that musical for you miss thang...all of them Jewish. Not I'm kidding...but it was fucking amazing and very different. I wish you lived here and we could go to all sorts of Broadway shows together. Some of them are so brilliant they leave you on the floor sobbing. Taboo was not among them. Boy George and Rosie O'Donnell must loathe all homosexuals to bring such a wretched mess to our shores. Who want's to see a show where all characters have nothing to do except indulge their obsession with getting fame and narcotics? Well, actually that makes it sound more interesting than it was.

Oh, I've gone on too long. I'll wite again some other day.

Bye

Tony Anonymous Boy

SKINTRAL WAYTION

Been seeing a lot of films lately, I don't know why, I've just been in that kind of mood. Went to Ms. Sunset Five, the Laemmle House and watched "Young Adam" with Tilda Swinton and my boy, Ewan McGreggor. Any chance i can see Ewan's magnify peter i jump on, but its always better looking in the fleshy flesh, and i'm so fortunate that i did get to see his member in person, though it wasn't erect.
Guess who lurks the lavatories of the Sunset 5? Yes, you got it, that nutty ginger headed dorkus Mike White of "Chuck and Buck" and "School of Rock" fame. I adore Mike, he is an unabashed, shameless hornpig. One minute he's at the stalls, the next he's on his cell pretending to be talking to someone, at the threshhold of the loo. Oh Calcutta!
I also saw that porn ingenue Matthew Rush, the Falcon Exclusive and star of yet another "Making Porn" Ronnie Larson theatre revival. Matthew is one funny looking pinhead of a mulatto blue movie star. There's something about his face and body that is just so offkilter. Matt was eating at the famous piss elegant restaurant, The French Market Place. I was there interviewing the Ditty Bops for the LA Weekly. The girls rode their cute mountain bikes to the interview---just darling. I'm so glad the DittyBops new record is getting a lot of airplay on KCRW.
Speaking of cruising, i had a high time lighthousing all the hunks entering the CRUNCH gym. Boy was i giving them hairy eyeballs---some of those bodies are unbelievable. Of course you can tell that there isn't much else going on with some of those young men. And they are so completely aware that they are being watched.

Also saw this Mexican film called "A Thousand Clouds of Peace . . ." the title is taken from the last line of a poem by the great Passolini. The movie is very poetic, filmed in stark high contrast black and white, in a non linear fashion. Manohla Dargis gave the flick a high score in her LA Times Review, and i can see why she liked it. The movie is bleak, and the films piquant little star has such an expressive face.
I also saw two mainstream films. "Ella Enchanted" which stars the the very likeable ingenue Anne Hathaway and a pretty Brit named Hugh Darcy. It was fluffy and light and i was somewhat flavouring that, though the picture could have been directed better. yes i saw "Hell Boy" with Selma Blair. Its my guilty pleasure, what can i say?

What a week. Went to see Lisa Teasley read from her new novel "Dive" at Borders Books in Hollywood. She looked so majestic and in such command. i'm so proud of my little baby award winning author niecey. She was meant to conquer and she's doing just that.

Went to the American Cinemateque to see Augusta's movie docu on the Velvet Hammer. Its delish. Really sparkling on all accounts. The other movie Broad Daylight didn't do it for me, so i walked out. I wanted to stay and see the live performances by Kitten DeVille, Bobby Pinz and Anna Bells, but i was just too exhausted.

SALOWOWENTEN COURT

Last Wed went to dinner with Edith Head, Fertile and his lovely fiance Yadi, to that cute East Indian Vegetarian restaurant on Sunset and Normandie. We were headed to Real Food Daily on LaCienega, but we were all so starved that we decided to go someplace closer. Had a marvy time, and the food was delicious. Love Fertile's fiance. She is sooooo good for him, and quite the vivacious young lady. Miss Edith was also in high spirits and kept me laughing out loud. I'm so proud of Edith. She's taken the break-up of her marriage to Steve of the Vandals, well. The girl doesn't waste any time. She's found herself a place for her and daughter Eva to live, and is managing to keep an amicable relationship with her ex. Bravo.

Andy Hunter of Mean Magazine gave me an assignment to interview Farnsworth Bentley. I love the man's name so i agreed, though i know absolutely nothing about him.

We were supposed to do the interview over the phone at a certain time, but Mr. Bentley's publicist didn't call to make the connect. I waited for a half an hour before she did call saying that Mr. Bentley was in a meeting and would be running late. That meeting took even longer and i was growing impatient with the whole matter, and called my editor to see what was underfoot. The publicist finally connected us and the interview went smoothly, though there were many annoying interruptions. Mr. Bentley was pleasant enough, though i don't think we could ever be best friends. I have to give him credit for grifting his way into a career as a bon vivant. As long as he doesn't take himself too seriously, and stays away from the booze and the pills, he could have some longevity. Something tells me that won't be the case.

Had an emergency power bitch meeting with my Platinum Oasis Crew. I guess the owner of the Flex Compound doesn't want to let us use the space for our art event. The recent bathhouse stink that is going down is making him want to keep a low profile, like that will help his cause. Homo's never know what is good for them. The Flex is perfect, but we also have plan B, Q and T, but if none of them work out we will just not do it this year, which is fine with me since i have enough on my silver laden plate.

Bricktops on Friday was a veritible hoot. Rebecca Lynn really shined singing a bunch of nifty numbers with a cute combo backing her up. I especially loved her rendition of "I'm a Dreamer, Aren't We All?". Lots of cute kids running about. Every week there are new people checking Bricktops out.

I was in a flurry because Andrew of Gould was on vacation in England, and i'm lost without my pretty Brit. Luckily Cesar Vega helped me. Cesar is a gem.

Mr. Uncertain took the nite off so it was the perfect opportunity for Bricktop to go into rehab. Buster Beaute' the star of Hustler White came by to be guest DJ and host and did a knockout burlesque routine stripping down to his candyapples. The pretty babies seemed to enjoy it.

Fantastic seeing Gwyn Kahn and beau at the club. Gwyn's grandfather is tin pan alley songwriter Gus Kahn. Miss Augusta looked divine. Her Velvet Hammer docu will be shown Wednesday at the American Cinemateque at the Egyptian Theatre. I still haven't seen the film, so i'm anxious to catch a peek.
Dance scholar Jens of East Berlin, came by also. Jens is such a sweetheart. He teaches at a college outside of London. DJ Pirate Jenny seemed to be surrounded in cute young men, and i have a crush on the bubbly butt boy who is a member of Heather Casssil's Toxic Tittie Collective. Gregori Derangere the star of the new movie Bon Voyage was also flirting with me in my boy drag look. He's much handsomer and younger looking in person then in the movie, and his female co-star Virginia Ledoyan is stunning. They stayed till after my show along with the director of Bon Voyage whose name i can't remember.

DARKIE VICTORIOUS

Took handsome little Papa, Frank Rodriguez out to eat at Zero One in the building that use to be the Mongolian BBQ shack, that is on the corner next to the Coral Sands Shopping Sex Center and Grocery Museum. I wanted to go the Korean BBQ on 8th Street but Frankie pie had already been there with his hot boyfriend P's, visiting Montana clan.

I was immediately put off by the hostess who wouldn't let us sit at this window table. She said it was reserved, but no one came to sit there during the course of our meal, which in the case of what i ordered was horrible. I hate asian fusion food. The trendy decor also turned my stomach and although he was somewhat cute, the DJ spinning for the diners was playing awful music, and he seemed like he was wearing a buttplug. The cute boy waiters were all very nice, and i shouldn't have been so bitchy to them just because the ugly hostess was being cunty. I should have spoken up and told the boys my concerns, but i figure the place won't even last two months, so why bother.

FIVE FINGER FERN

My birthday was in February and I'm still milking it in April.
My darling Anderson Cooper took me to dinner in J-Town and then to REDCAT at the Dizney Hall to see Peach Blossom Fan, the Chinese Opera that Stephin Merritt of the Magnetic Fields, wrote the music and lyrics too. We were having so much fun at supper that we lost track of the time, so we missed a couple of minutes of the piece which was beautifully staged and mounted. One of my amazing Platinum Oasis installation artists Michael Casselli (of the burning electricity room) handled the technical direction.

The cast was mostly made up of wide-eyed, bushy tailed Cal Arts Theatre students, and recent grads, which was a little sad, as most of them have no stage presence or oomph to carry off something of this nature---the exception being the pintsize ganymede baby dyke looking boy, who perfectly showboated as the Emperor Fu Norton. The lead actress was a black girl who looked like a tranny, she had a pleasant singing voice, but I felt couldn’t hold the precise movements together and came off a tad flat. Her male suitor fared much better, his lankyness and asphalt hair collick making him the perfect dashing young poet lauryette.

The older equity waver actors really did it for me. Nothing can compare to having a little gravel and texture. especially the settled aged women---the over-the-top black lady who played the Plum Pimp Mama and the knockout dagger Mar'Lou Rosato as the Provincial Governer/Prime Minister.

Stephin Merritt outdid himself with the music and lyrics, the rhymes where delicious in true Merritt fashion. I’m sure he was groaning at some of the rendering by the Cal Arts kids who are too mainstream theatre queeny in their approach to fully do justice to Stephin’s ill musical vision.

I’d sure love to see a Merritt/Ang Lee musical moving picture collaboration. That would be granada!

LILLY ST. CYR

Went to the Velvet Hammer’s sparkling presentation of Illuminata at the new Avalon Theatre formerly the Hollywood Palace. Just an amazing spectacle of bountiful bouliciousness. My young goddaughter Michele Carr is a masterful directrice and producer. I’m so proud of her achievements, and to think she started off as one of my discoveries when I made her a Dominette in Pedro Muriel and Esther way back in the early 90s. She’s come along way and has carved her own special niche in the heritage burlesque scene and is destined to conquer, conquer, conquer.

Oh Bricktops, you always amaze me, and with the Ditty Bops performing you can’t go wrong. I’ve been waiting forever to have the girls back and they never disapoint. LA hasn’t seen this much youthful beauty and talent in many years. There is no stopping this group from rising to the high ranks. Their new CD is flawless, and soon everyone will be dripping in the envy and magique that is The D Bops. There aren’t enough words to express my admiration for this group, and the boys in the band-Yowza, the piano man---masculine perfection, a barrel chested cross between silent screen stars George O’Brian and Gilbert Roland---ladies he will make you scream with shrill delight! and the stand up bass player, I was won over immediately with his tousseled hair good lucks and husky, young Gary Cooper aw shucks demeanor. I wonder what his bung hole tastes like? Oh and the group’s photographer what a red hot silver foxxxxxx!!! He got my cooze all wet and hanging, and his publicity photo of Abby and Amanda shimmers.

So many hot celebutantes came out this week a nice mixture of mainstream and underground starinas just the best recipe for a club nite. Pre-Rafaelite lovely, Melissa Auf Der Maur with Josh Homme(Queen of Stone Age) and Brant Bjork. The delish female husband of Stephin Merritt and singer with the Magnetic Fields, Claudia Gonson. New York elite The Dueling Bankheads, Ebony Jett (who now lives in LA). Ron & Russell Mael of Sparks, hotel hunkina Andre’ Belaz with new honey Uma Thurman (looking ravishing now that she dumped that loserick husband of hers Ethan Hawke. The legends legends of LA club royalty Richard Velasco, Tra La La, Henry Peck and Fertile La Toyah Jackson with fiance. Fertile is getting married on May 29th. Bricktops regulars Dan, Monica and Princess Isabella, Mulholland Drive beauty Rebecca Del Rio, and social celebrity Jean Spinosa who brought a gaggle of infamous Bay Area luminaries including Jenna of the late, great literary and arts magazine Flatter with Christine of the Bernal Heights Coven.

I sang a brand new song about Hitler that went like this:

Oh Adolf Hitler
Hitler, Adolf
You’re alive and well tra la la
living it up in Argentina

Oh Mister Hitler, Adolf Hitler baby
they saved your brain, and penii
ooh la la
you’re having lots of sex in
Argentina

Oh Hitler juicy Adolf
you still rule the world
and the Whitehouse
Tar Ta
and you do it so well
from Buenos Aires
Argen-tina

Oh and I got a million emugs wanting to know the lyrics to the new song I sang the other week called Chicken and Waffles. Well here they are for your perusal:

Chicken and Waffles
waffles and chicken
lickity splits
and don’t forgets me
some Harmony grits

Chicken and waffles
waffles and chickens
buttermilk biscuits
I’d love to munch on your
literal Harmony grits

PERPETUAL WAR FOR PERPETUAL PEACE

Just received this great emug from the handsomest man on the planet, writer Mark Simpson, who is responsible for coining the term 'Metrosexual'. We've been friends now for a few years and he has the sharpest mind in all of Christendom. I share with you what he wrote plus the email i wrote him so that there is a little context.

Voila:

Devastating glamourpuss sexkitten
Not only are you terrifyingly pretty you're also frighteningly psychic - i was in the US recently (and met up with a friend/fan of yours, Peter McQuaid)
In the course of my visit i did indeed end up wedged between a couple of paratroopers and ended up ravishing the rump of one of them (the married one).
Though in hindsight I wonder if I wasn't actually the one being ravished - or at least my 'uncut English cock' they kept going on about
but that's straight paratroopers for you.
By the way, I'm writing up the story for Salon so I'll forward you it when it airs - the proceedings were also filmed, but I've yet to summon the courage to sign the model release.
Because of nerves (you may not believe this, but I'm not a natural exhibitionist) I was only able to summon a semi-erection - and with two very friendly young members of america's elite forces on hand to help, what could my excuse be?
Alas, my itinerary didn't take me to southern california, but I'm hoping to make that journey later this year - and then we will be re-united - perhaps I might be able to write about your event for some mag.
Very sorry you haven't had your copy of ST MOZ, but it seems no one has - the publisher's distributor in the us is the same criminally incompetent outfit that distributed THE QUEEN IS DEAD - i've threatened them with all kinds of wrath if they don't get you a copy asap.
When do you leave for East Berlin? I've never visited East Germany or Eastern Europe, even though I have a degree in Eastern European history. The GDR was my favourite Iron Curtain country. I hear that East German boys are so much more aryan than the West German boys.
I think it must be all that mass rapes by the Red Army at the end of the war. The slavs always looked more like the Nazi propaganda heroes than the Nazis.
Mx

----- Original Message -----
From Ms. Davis
marksimpson.com
Sent: Monday, April 05, 2004 8:19 PM
Subject: Re: ST MOZ


darling handsome masculine perfection: i sit here in my humble studio looking out my window at downtown los angeles, thinking of you, and the young hornacious rumps that you've most likely been devasting lately.

Oh those fortunate military youth---seminal depositories, fated to be mandraked by the biggest and the best. Years from now when they look back on your pillaging of their succulent innards, they will sigh heavy in kind.

I've just been involved in the regular doldrums, trying my best to create art in an artless world. Looking forward to finally leaving the U.S. of A for the former GDR, East Berlin. I had a marvelous time their in 2001 spending six glorious months performing and hopping off to other cities for shows and getting the chance to meet you in the fleshy flesh. There is no inspiration in this Los Ang town, so i must leave for better green dolphin streets.

My roaring 20s club Bricktops is going strong. Having a blast putting it on every week, but its tiresome at the same time.

Haven't gotten the St. Moz book yet. Does you publ have my current mailing address?

Vaginal Davis Jr.
Cheese Endique Trifecta
P.O. Box 741-278
Hancock Park, CA 90004-9278
USA

When will you be visiting the colonies? In July Ron and I may be putting together another Platinum Oasis art event, this time in a bathhouse----yummy. Of course everyone will wind up having lots of sex, except me. The storina of my life.

i remain your devoted and loving loyal servant
keeper of the flame and sacred cult of Mark Simpson, the demi-god.


Vagimula

THUD

I've been on the program lately. It feels good not to drink. Professor Doyle took me to dinner at the new Rowena restaurant Blair. Superb food, and service. I wanted a glass of wine with dinner, but i resisted the temptation. The chef use to be at The Water Grill, and he is really sexy, so is the latino sous chef. Lots of people we knew also eating. Dr. D's cute gallic friend with this girl who owns a gallery in Chinatown on North Broadway and also the mulatto director of the movie Drumline was eating with one of the Outfest board of directors, a lovely black lady who is a major studio executrix.

had a joyous meeting with Steven Vowels the mgr of the Flex Compound. He seems to be congenial about our having an art event on the premises. If it happens it will be a historic occasion.

Bricktops was pure genius. Anna Biller a sweet Cal Arts girl performed as Miss Pettyflowers with a male companion. They sang a trib to Gertrude Lawrence that involved music from the 1900s to the 1960's. Great costumes that Anna makes herself.

The Heatherette fashion collective came by with a bunch of pals along with tranny oddity Amanda LePore. Sudanese model Alek Wek stopped in with directors Antoine Fuquo and the Michael Gondry who directed the latest Jim Carey flick. Lots of people dressed to the 9ines. Just the way i like it at Bricky's.

COME BACK LITTLE BATHSHEBA

When i saw those images in the newspaper, i thought it was some charcoaled pinata that those men were beating with a shoe. Then i read the article attached. Horrific. The countdown to Armegeddon is just beginning. Mind you the other night i received a vision about a giant earthquake that will happen in Los Angeles in the next month. There isn't going to be any way you can prepare for this one.

MR BLANDINGS

Books I must read: ""Too Much Flesh and Jabez", "White on Black on White" and
"A Starbright Lie" all by Coleman Dowell.

Went to see "The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind". Best performances by Jim Carrey ever. I usually hate him and his mugging, that is in the Robin Williams school of needing too much attention, but this time out, he was really subdued, and he reminded me of the same Jim Carrey I use to know back in the 80s when he went out with my friend Kelly Stallings, and was shy and retiring. Kate Winslet is super amazing in the film and Mark Ruffalo just makes me want to scream and bite him, he’s so damn sexy with those lips and that thick full hair, plus he has a bubble butt and may I say that Kirsten Dunst is a very good young actress, but she sure is haggy for such a young girl. By the time she’s 30 she will look 50, which only adds to her charm.

Oh I forgot to relay that I saw Lypsinka at the Stammer Buffet. I guess she was trying to work a butch look. I hope it paid off for her.

FARFLUNG

Hosted Far Fetched event for the Foundation for Art Resources (Far) Saturday. The event took place at this 1920s warehouse space that is below the 4100 Bar (formerly the Detour) The first time I performed at this space was almost 20 years ago for this party put on by Mickey Petralia and the Power Tools gang. My performance group The Afro Sisters were the headliners and opening up for us was Jane’s Addiction. It was the second time they opened for me. One of their first gigs was at a Theoretical Party at the Park Plaza Hotel in MacArthur Park, and I was the headliner for that too. The sound was really murky. My Bricktops performance wasn’t really suited to the space. The FAR gang did a good job cleaning the place up. The building is used for rock video and movie filming and is owned by the same people who rent out the Antonio Moreno Silverlake mansion.

Mr. Uncertain wasn’t featuring the whole thing. He’s such a snob. Well to be honest, I felt like I was turning into that drag queen hostess Momma, with doing a raffle. What next bingo?

Drank way too much. Got home and hurled up all over myself before making it to the toilet. Disgusting.

The next day i felt miserable. Ate at the Last Cap b4 the 101. Unseasonably warm, hate it. Slept all day till early evening, then went to Mrs. Stammer for the sunday buffet. Lots of fugmos. Played it aloof and one Garden Grover asked if he could give me a massage. He said the magick word, and proceeded to get the Dolls proverbial gnut. Took Metro back to Hollywood, ate some pizza and called it a night. Too bad i have to wake up early.

Was taken to dinner last week for my birthelday by the great Karol DeGraffenreid and her handsome Scandanavian husband Kejhl Johansen to Musso & Frank. We had a delightful time, laughing the night away. Lots of olde time stars like Tony Curtis were eating next to us, plus some bland rock n rollers from groups that I don’t even know, but everyone else seemed to recognize them. Kejhl use to be in the old art punk band The Urinals. He still does music, but his day job is a lawyer with the LA District Attorney’s office. I really have a varied group of friends.

Had a breaky get-to-gether with Meesh of the Epiladies at the Brite Spot in Echo Park. They are under new management. I hate change, but maybe its for the best. They redesigned the mens restroom so now you don’t have to be a fidget to use it. I also got together with Jeffreyland Hilbert UK and Miss Morgan of Rhodes. We had a hoot of a girlfriend friendly time. Jeffreyland may be from Idaho, but he is blacker then me and Morgan combined.

Bricktops Enrico Caruso Nite was a smash hit. Alex Garcia of Club Chubb performed singing two arias, and he is mega talented. He didn’t even use a microphone, but he projected so well, no one had a hard time hearing him. Just brilliant. Ruben Studard watch out, there’s a new teddy bear in town, with a cock ring. Lots of cute kids and new faces. My big dicked ginger headed boy came into the DJ booth to give me a whiff of all that stuffed in his pantaloons. Wowza!!!!! Semi regular Tim Armstrong of Rancid and his nicely dressed posse showed up along with Sammy Naceri the French/Arab star of the film "La Mentale". Bibbe Hansen and Sean Carrillo were also looking splendid, as well as Don & Augusta, Albert of Watts, Jean Spinosa, Marky M and his cute boy brigade, Norman Ghoulsen of the Acres, Richard "Al Jolsen" Halperin, and a scantily clad Maggie Gyllenhaal. I love you Mag, but I wish you’d bring your brother Jake to the club. I’d like to suck on him.

PASSAGE TO MARSEILLE

Bricktops is so unpredictable. I never know what to expect every Friday. Had a wonderful night---the theme was completely goofball---- a Saint Patrick’s Day Fellatio Party. Whatever that means. I guess it was wishful thinking on my part that all the men would just start pulling out their penises. Shannon Kelley who use to be a main programmer with Outfest was the special guest. He played cello and sang beautifully some Irish songs and shanty’s. It was joyous. I created an original ditty that went like this:

"Pull a train on me,
come on you can do it.
the giddy abandon of the gang bang is just a rite of passage
young men have to go through, so
you have my permission to pull a train on me."

You could have heard a pin drop during that number.

I don’t understand it, but a ton of famous people were at the club. One of my favorite French actresses Isabelle Adjani(Queen Margo/The Story of Adele H) looked incredible. I couldn’t tell if she has had plastic surgery. She must have---the woman looks really young, and she's at least 50 by now.

Yuguslav tennis star Svetozar Marinkovic who use to be married to Mike Tyson’s ex, Robin Givens came with Swiss Tennis pro Roger Federer who is really young, sexy and hot hot hot!!!! I wonder if the two Europeans are fudgepacking each other.

Alex Kapranos of the Scottish band Franz Ferdinand, was really taking quite a lsuper duper liking to Mr. Uncertain, so was one of my favorite underrated actors Matthew Lillard(Scooby Doo), aussie hunkina Heath Ledger, Mark Ruffalo, Josh Schwartz, the producer or write of some TV show called Orange County and Gonzaga college basketball cutie Cory Violette rounded out the crazed mix of partygoers. There was even this strange model/actor couple who came to the DJ booth asking if the music i was playing was all that would be heard all night. They obviously stumbled into the club unaware of the theme, but they stayed till closing which i didn't expect.

THE WEEK THAT BLURRED

Due to my silly sickness the last week or so is very hesitant. This is all that i could remember:

Doug Gordon took me and Tommy Gear of the Screamers to a nice dinner at this designy Pho noodle house in Silverlake. Doug gave me very sweet birthday presents that i adore. Tommy gave me preview of the new book he has designed for Lyle Ashton Harris. Its quite beautiful. I need to get busy and work on my book.

Had breaky with Lady Bunny and Ebony Jett at House of Pies. I was feeling lousy. First time i've eaten at HOP since Mary Magdalene's death. Felt strange. Bunny is in town DJing for some MACY event at the BEv Center. Crazy as ever. She wrote a song for Lady Miss Kier that George Clinton has also added some vocals and riffs. Wow

Andreas returns from San Francisco. He's staying with me at my little apartment. Not much room.

Debbie King and Tim's band Maw & Paw perform at Bricktops for our William Butler Yates night. Nice crowd, cute kids in the band. Debbie is a hot star, i just love her!!!!! My sickness put me in the worse mood and of course I did the worse performance ever, my singing really sucked.

Did formal yard sale. Lots of people came out. Everyone thinks i'm leaving in a week or so. I'll still be here for some time, one can't change countries in a second.

Had to send Andreas packing. Not enough room for two people when one is sick with a cold. Thank god Daddy took him in. Poor Andreas isn't exactly connecting with the mensis here in Los Ang. Wish i could be a better host, but i'm not feeling well.

Friday at Bricktops its a salute to Valaida Snow with a marvelous performance by My Barbarian. Malik wrote a brand new musical score. All three of the kids in high spirits with great singing and choreography. Lovely crowd of cuties.

Sexy Roddy Bottom of Imperial Teen came by, Don Bolles of the Germs and Lukas Haas who plays Don in the movie about the Germs. Bibbe Hansen looking gorgeous with new hairstyle. Great seeing newlyweds Tulsa Kinney and Charlie Rappelye.

I'm not feeling well, but i rise to the occasion and belt out a little ditty about the Passion of the Christ that goes like this:

The Passion
the passion of the Jesus p. christ child
Its not a sin
for me to not be featuring
Mel Gibson

GIRTHDAY PARTY

My formal girth celebration with Frank Rodriguez of Club Sucker was held this year at MJ’s on Hyperion(formerly Woody’s) We wanted to have a dance party and the newly redesigned homo moderne club made it convenient for us. Bar manager Tom Walker was very gracious and courteous, so was his staff. The high tech equipment took a while to get use to, as I’m not technically oriented, but once I started the first round of spinning, I didn’t want to leave the booth.

Guest DJ’s included Sit n Spin/Trade legend Jeffreyland Hilbert-UK, Monkey Bone, Glenn Masculine, and Sexnation Matt. We premiered new films by Ste’Eve Harrington Hall and Lil Papa’s Triatheletes, Wrestling Champs and Showering Jocks Montages. Yummy.

Tons of celebutants partook in the proclitities: Entertainment 2Nite producer extroidinaire, and legendary punk beauty Jane Cantillon, Meesh and Selene Luna of the Epiladies, director Darren Stein(Jawbreaker), Heather Cassils and her high holy Toxic Titties Collective, Daniel Bruhl of "Good Bye, Lenin!", Nuyorican poet Willie Perdomo, fighting promoter Raul Garzon with his handsome Tijuana boxing champ Erik Morales, Silverlake socialite Rage Brenna, Ron Athey, Electroclash godfather Dave Harrow of Technova fame, writer Lisa Teasley, make-up artist to the stars Jeff Judd, filmmaker Laura Nix, Rob Zebrecky and Arthur editor Jay Badcock, LA Weeklytes Steven Mikulan and the lovely Sandra Ross, derma tex guru Eddie Gilmore, Sony Pictures Exec Michael "Twee" Dykes, Stuart Townsend (without Charlize) designers, Marky Magdaleno, and Morgan Olsen, Lyor Cohen, the former chief execuive of Island Def Jam now with Edgar Bronfman’s Warner Music Group, Kent William Albin with some writers from Fashion Daily, Visionaire and Women’s Wear Daily, Marvina Jones, writer and independent curator David Cotner, Professor Jennifer Doyle, F2M film editor Billy Rich(Black Hawk Down) and Mrs. Michael Glass of Amok Books fame.

KINGS CROSSING

Had to get up early to start my yard sale in front of Daddy Athey’s garage at his Silverlake compound. All my collectibles that have been in storage for 2 years and are finally within my ladylike grasp. I’m trying to sell as much as I can to finance my moving to East Berlin. Amazingly with no fanfare I sold quite a lot. Had to end the sale early because my Italian pal Andreas was arriving at my studio from London at around 3:30. Of course the subway and busses are not running on schedule because of the damn Acadamy Awards. I hate the Oscars. I haven’t watched it since 1983 or 84. Its so dull, how can anyone in their right mind stand viewing it. People I know who’ve been to the ceremony said that its even more boring in person. If I’m ever nominated I promise I won’t attend.

Took my guest for a bit of sight seeing on Hollywood Blvd. He was disapointed at the tacky clothing stores and lack of glamour. I don’t blame him. We ate some pizza and then had some drinks at the Spotlight Pub. The hustlers were hideous except for one very young, but very womanly boy whore, who would have been attractive if he didn’t gesture so much or talk. He really ruined it when he started lipsynching to Shania.

We ended the evening at the tired sauna. I warned Andreas that it would be mostly speed freaks in a tweaky frenzy. Surprise, surprise I actually got way laid by this giant handsome visiting Brit with a huge willis, giant muscles and thyroid eyes. Poor A. didn’t find his prince Harming, though as we were leaving we did see this little blondine dork, wearing glasses with an amazing body. Of course whenever I have sexel I need to eat immediately, so I had a late nite snack at Popeyes, which was filled with nutters homeless waifs, sociopaths, skitsofrenics, and the icky bridge and tunnel kids that go to all those lame Hollywood clubs.

Woke up early to resume the yard sale. Nice having A helping me. Daddy Athey took him to catch his bus to San Fran where he’ll be till Thursday then back with "The Doll". Made some good sales and had a power bitch meeting with Kirsten of Outfest. Seems like they want us back, after the disaster of Platinum Snapmeat. Kirsten has brought together a great new crew including Moj who is a delight----Very organized and cute.

SO THIS IS LOVE?

Was the theme for Bricktops as we saluted high C susie Grace Moore. Julianna Snapper the musicalogist and intermedia Opera diva, sang to perfection, looking ravishing at the same time. Her accompanyist Linda Kernahan added a gentle, delicate touch in her piano playing that gave the proceedings an ethereal quality. Ms. Snapper and Ron Athey are collaborating on a new piece that will premiere in England called the "Judas Cradle" based on, of all things, the Inquisition. One movement in the new piece is titled, "That Disassociated Feeling" Pure geniustata.

Making the pilgramage to Bricky’s to shower praises on Heather Cassils and her Toxic Titties posse, Rage, Sean Griffin, Dame Darcy, Gwen Kahn, Toby McGuire, Sofia and Roman Coppola, Ron Athey and his butch realness Swiss beau Maxmillian, Miss Morgan Olsen who made Ms. Davis’ stunning gown, Tre Cool(Green Day) Tim Armstrong (Rancid), The Herbst Twins,. Europa, Meesh of the Epiladies, Kent William Albin, Shauna Leone, Sylvia Rhone CEO of Elektra Entertainment (without her gal pal Missy Elliot) and John Fruciante of the Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Bricktop sang a new ditty that went like this:

Bricktops, Brickbottoms
tops, bottoms
sloppy bottoms, mud slides

it takes its toll
one never knows what
will come out of an olde bung hole

BABY THE RAIN MUST FALL

And boy did it last night going to this tired party for Fashion Wire Daily at this new ugly bar/restaurant called Bliss that is anything but. The only reason i went was that my New York pal Kent who use to be the minister of informacion with Fischerspooner was connected, but i didn't see him anywhere, and me and my companion Christine Pelisek of the LA Weekly were appalled at the FUGLY crowd, bad music and overall tepidness of the scene. And a party without FREE FOOD is no party. The licquor sponsor Extreme, well lets just say i hope this company goes under, and Bliss will most likely be closed in less then a month as well.

WHAT WE DO IS SECRET

Thats the name of the bio pic of Darby Crash and the Germs. Shane West is going to play Darby. Thats a good choice. He's young and cute and does resemble him in way. Though i think they should use Shia LeBouf. Shane is a little too old now. Bijou Phillips as Lorna Doom is fantastic casting. This is a secret, so please don't tell anyone, but i tricked with Shane a few years ago when he was coming from that 24 hour gym on Beverly Blvd near LaCienega. I don't remember the name of the gym but its connected to where Malie Finn has her casting offices. Shane is quite the dinge queen, and i put on a masculine ghetto thug act, since that was obviously what he was in the mood for. Lets just say this. He wasn't shy. And i have his underwear as a momento.

One of my good girlfriends is getting a divorce. She is handling it extremely well, I'm proud of her and love her dearly. Another one of my girlyfriends, the famous Fertile LaToyah Jackson is getting married. And no she isn't preggers. Fertile's day job is an elementary school teacher. She just bought a house in a beautiful section of Pasadena, and now is getting hitched. I'm so proud of her. She's finally grown up into a responsible and committed young woman.

Hector, the Scandanavian Mexican cooked me a delicious birthday dinner last night. I'm really working my birthday so that it will last a year. My formal party is this Thursday. I hope it doesn't rain on my Streisand parade.

KISS THEM FOR ME

Getting an avalanche of emails about the erotic short "Wo ist Manfred" i made with Swiss uber hunk Cyril Kuhn for Bricktops. All i can say is, "its about time someone put humour back in the bedroom where it belongs!"

ONTARIO CONTRARIO


This email just sent to me from Joel Gibb of Canada's brilliant musical group, The Hidden Cameras. Joel is also in the latest issue of BUTT magazine

vag, hey there nice to hear from you. what you been up
to? I have been finishing up a new record called
mississauga goddam and am going to scandanavia next
week, i can't wait for the men.....
summer sounds like a possibility, sex motel yes, hook
me up babe
Joel

INVITATION TO THE DANCE

Dinner with Daddy, Yuroslav "Slava" Mogutin and his modern dance lover Raul Dumas at the Bitchen in Silverlake. Of course I arrived way too early and went next door to the KnackBar for a dwink. Bo the sweet burly bartender, was feeding me stiffies entreveneously. Daddy found me sloshed and dragged me to supper. Everyones brothers uncle was eating at the Bitch on this night. Sitting next to us was Lord Andrew of Gould and his lover Lenny, the young Elder. In the next room was Juan Fernandez, his boywife, Tad Coughenour and some visiting dagger royalty. Then Glen Meadmore pops in with his tranny girlfriend Nekko followed by Professor Doyle and her Frenchman Laurent. It continued like this the entire evening. After eating we popped back into the bar to hear Mrs. Michael Glass DJ his soul classixxxxx. Of course Slava and Raul turned all the male heads. That cha-cha designer Jose of Exit One fame has a new mail order child bride. Where does he find them? Of course Jose's young boy prize wanted my visiting Europeans who were eager sanctioned for dragging him back to their hotel in Venice.

CHAVEZ RAVINE

Went to Cyril’s Solano Canyon studio to finish the editing on "Wo ist Manfred" our little erotica project for Bricktops. Cyril is a genius. He made the film look just like a silent era blue movie. I can’t wait to premiere it on Friday.

FVLANTIN FURIA

My beautiful English husband Lord Andrew, gave me some wonderful birthday presents and cooked me an incredible vegetarian meal that consisted of a carrot & corriander soup that was pure deleaven!

Later in the eve "Firecracker! Bill Haines Nite" at Bricktops was over the proverbial top! Mark Simon and London’s premiere big peniled singing group The Younger DeGenerates[Severin Behnin, Robert Durham, Bill Gorin Chris Khurt, David Penddleton, Stephan Schilling, Nigel Teixeira and Sara Schilling.] tore up! Their performance was so political and humorous and the singing was electric.

What a lovely crowd of kids. Its good to see people wearing fancy outfits. I hate jeans, T-shirts and trainers. My opening song expressed my fashion philosophy:

"What shall I wear to Bricktops?
My Frankie B Low Rise Jeans and a chain wallet
or a velvet gown or Tuxedo"

Lots of luminaries in the audience. British "It" girls Lady Victory Hervey and Tara Palmer-Tomkinson, who hate each other. Luckily the club is big enought that they didn’t have to rub shoulders. Also the delightful Henry Peck, who is one of the originators of LA style clubs and is also a dynamite DJ and hair burner. Guin Turner popped in and was actually looking very sober. Kirsten Schafer the head programmer with Outfest, just came back from The Berlin Festival and was in high spirits, regaling me with stories of her Deutchland adventures. It was also good to see Rudy Bleu of Scutter Mag, artist Albert Cuellar who is always dressed to the 9’s. Albert is an urban pioneer. He has lived in a house in Watts since 1986. He bought it then for only $25,000. Not many Hollywood hipsters can claim that they live in Watts. Cathy Opie is the only other caucasion artist that I know of who lives south of the Santa Monica Freeway. Osseus Labyrinth use to live in South Central but they moved to Echo Park recently. It was also fantastic seeing Mrs. Michael Glass, of Amok Books fame, songstress Abby Travis who told me that the Viper Room isn’t owned by Johnny Depp anymore and that she got stiffed by the new owners after doing a recent show. Looking juicy was Vera Duffy of the Velvet Hammer, Ginger Goldmine, choreographer Jean Spinosa who just moved here from San Francisco and is charming all of café society, Don Bolles of the Germs, Animal Charm, MOCA maven Karen Lofgren, Jamie Luner(Melrose Place) first lady of harsh, Lydia Lunch, Shia La Beouf(Holes) Michael Pitt (The Dreamers) Richard Velasco, designers Zac Posen, Proenza Schouler, Dutch modern dance god Raul Dumas and his boyfriend the beautiful Russian Rimbaud, Yuroslav Mogutin (Gang of Foreskins). Swiss experimental filmmaker Cyril Kuhn created a beautiful erotic pastiche called "Wo ist Manfred" featuring Ms. Bricktop and the movie delighted the audience to no end.

MEMBER OF THE FIFTH ESTATE

This little emug from my New York based fashion guru:

GLOBAL VILLAGER: Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the airport, Glenn Belverio - aka "Global Editor" - will be jetting off to Italy in two weeks, Associated Press has learned today. The globe-trotting trollop has been invited to visit a German village tucked away somewhere in the Italian Alps, near Turino. "I'll never forget the month I spent there researching goat leather for our Italian hiking boots", J. Peterman of J.Peterman catalogue, Belverio's employer, recounted fondly when he heard his prized copywriter was flying the coop. "Despite Glenn's problems with opium addiction and his anti-social behavior toward cake parties, his writing skills make him a valuable asset to the company. We hope he comes back soon."

"Glenn's Italian-American heritage and Teutonic intellect make him a natural for covering the German scene in Italy", spit-fire feminist Camille Paglia commented. "He'll take the Alps by storm."

After repeated calls to Belverio's cubicle, we finally reached the elusive writer for comment. "The Italians really know how to throw a press junket!" Belverio shouted over the cacophony of clicking typewriters. "After two weeks of Burger King and pizza, I'm looking forward to some sauerbraten ravioli and Black Forest tiramisu. Now, I have to get back to my copy....we're on deadline for a section on men's twill pants. I've called it 'Triumph of the Twill'."

LIFE REGAINED

Frances Partridge of the Bloomsbury Group died in London at age 103. The Bloomsbury Group was one of the wackiest of the famed literary sets during the 20s. The members consisted of Virginia Woolf, Lytton Strachey, Dora Carrington, Ralph Partridge and EM Foster. They were all held together by spit, aesthetics, sex and suicide.
My literary set is called The Doomsbury group and consists of Ron Athey, Lisa Teasley, Kembra Pfhaler, Glenn Belverio, and Bruce La Bruce. I hope that at the end of this century I’m still around to be the diarist for my Gritish partners in grime.

Anderson Cooper was my Valentines Date on Saturday. We aren’t really lovers, its just that since we both were Miss Lonelyhearts on the day of questione, Mr. Cooper decided he would romance me with all the trimmings. Luckily we weren’t the only samesex couple at the lovely fancy Korean BBQ moderne diner on Olympic at Western. It took forever to get a table, but it was well worth the wait. The new generation of Korean boys, sure are hunky and masculine. I was wanting me some of that rice, rice baby. My only complaint is that the lighting needs to be dimmer, especially around the bar area. It was nice and dark in the large patio section.

After supper we shared a bottle of vino and watched Rueben Mamoulian’s brilliant "Applause" starring Helen Morgan,(an early Valentine gift to me from the sweet boys of the Science Holiday Art Collective).at Anderson’s penthouse suite at the Ravenswood, the apartment on Rossmore in Hancock Park that was owned by Mae West. We also wanted to watch the "Lost Films of Science Holiday, but it was almost 1am, and neither of us could keep our eyes open.