I predict that Joel Gibb of the Hidden Cameras is going to be a mega star. His CD the Smell of Our own is the record of the year so-far. It could be the recording to define the new millinea. I love every song and I play them over and over again. They are now becoming my personal anthems. "Smells Like Happiness" says it all the way nothing can. Its a condemnation of "the gays" but its not shrill its plaintive,

"happy are we when we choose to wear the blindfold
and mark our own day with a parade and a song"

Joel does have a golden bone, and a golden bum. He’s exquisitely beautiful. The best things to ever come out of Canuck, I’m convinced.

Heard a sad tale about a friend whose drug abuse led him to the utter depths of the 90th floor. This queen was a popular hairdresser and was married to a dot.com magnate living in a house up in the high rolling hollywood hills, well he and his husb divorced and he slimmed down and started up on drugs and going to tired circuit parties and got a much younger beau and just became a circuit diva. He had a house in the silverlake, wound up selling it for more drugs and ended up living in his car, which I think is now broken so he’s completely homeless or couch surfing. Let this be a cautionary tale. Sometimes I wish I could be a drug addict, but I’m too much of a control queen to completely lose it in that fashion. I’m sure I can think of other ways to avoid reality, but MY reality is so REAL its SURREAL. So I think I’ll stick to legal substances like liquor.

Finally got to go to Clubb Chubb, Selene’ Luna of the Velvet Hammer Heritage Review and Alex’ Sunday afternoon beerbust tribute to jelly’s, chubbs and their chasers, otters, cubs, bears, bronto’s, mastadons, manatees, walrus’, whales, buffalo’s and bison. I had a great time. Too bad William Conrad isn’t alive to enjoy the spectacle. But that plus sized rapper/actor Heavy D. was digging the action and also Fat Joe. Are they lovers?
Alex dj’s a great selection of free style music, and it was wonderful being in a club where I’m literally the smallest bloke. There is even a nice group of substance sized women in the mix. Club Chubb which is at the Parlour Club every other Sunday from 3-7pm is the direction for nite life in the future.
Received Pansy Division’s new CD Total Entertainment. They’ve definitely gotten a lot better. The production by Chris Xefox is really textured and sparkly. Their years of being relentless and just putting it out there, has certainly paid off. The singing has really improved too. Perhaps if they continue in this direction in a few more albums they’ll have a record that be an artistic breakthrough in all directions.

One of my favorite directors of all time died, John Schlissinger. He had been ill for at least three years. His lover is the Hollywood photographer Michael Childers. Who took pics of me and Ron Athey in his latest book. I got to meet Mr. Schless at that time and it was a thrill. Mr. Schless and Mr. Childers were known for their very kinka-saurus parties of the late 70s to mid 80s. In fact Ms. Thomatha Cruise himself use to partake in some wild shenanigans in his younger hungrier days before becoming the ultimate Hollywood power critch, as well as ultra guarded with his sacred movie image.
My favs Schless flicks: Far From the Madding Crowd, Darling, Midnight Cowboy, The Day of the Locust, Sunday, Bloody Sunday and A Kind of Loving. Too bad he died with that awful Madonna/Rupert Everett film being his last. It was the movie that killed him.

Cesar Vega took me to lunch at that Luna Sol place on 6th Street across from MacArthur Park, The Park Plaza and below the Ashbury. I didn’t really want eat at Luna, because the place has a creepy hippy dippy vibe being that its v eg etarian and the dreadlocked black man that works behind the counter has such dirty fingernails, it doesn’t seem like he ever washes his hands or takes a bath. For this very reason I haven’t been to the place since around December. There was this Asian or latin girl behind the counter as well and she was not featuring me and Cesar for whatever reason. I guess she couldn’t decipher the nature of our relationship and it was too disturbing for her. I have that kind of affect on people.
My eggplant sandwich was tasty though. I love hanging with Mr. V. He is so laid back and relaxed, a very low key and low maintenance dude. Later in the evening I wound up going with Lenny the young elder bar scouting. I guess he wants to buy another cantina. We went to Primetime on Santa Monica at Western. PT use to be the gay bar Uncle Bill’s. But I don’t know if its gay now. The bartenders are all Vietnamese women, and there are hardly ever any customers. But they do have a nice parking lot in the back. Last time i was at this bar was when Prof. Jose Munoz of NYU had a birthday party.
We also checked out Hank & Frank’s where I had one of my birthday parties several years ago. The place still has that awful florescent lighting. The owner is some old black dancer who use to hang out with Sammy Davis Jr. Maybe he was one of Sammy’s lovers. Sammy did get around.

Took Cesar as my date to the screening of the Spanish musical comedy El Otro lado de la Cama (The Other Side of the Bed). The film started off really good, sortof like the Umbrellas of Cherbourg, but then it got a little tedious with the dance moves being very Twyla Tharp lite. I wish they showed lead actor Ernesto Alterio’s naked booty more. That would have been a much nicer diversion. Before the flick started we went to the Bev and Robertson Starbucks on Designer Row. Boy has this area changed since the 1970s when it was a street cruisers paradise. Academy award winning star Adrian Brody was walking past and I could have sworn he gave me the eye. He sure is one skinny minny. He looks like a Dr. Mengele victim. These young actor manchilds are worse then the bony ladies with their brittle Anna and Mia bodies and big lolipop heads.

Had an early afternoon date with a secret admirer who took me to the Sunset 5 Theatre to see the movie Camp. Ran into Adrian Brody AGAIN. He was eating outside of this restaurant on Sunset and Fairfax called The Griddle. He was with some blondine that looked like his boyfriend, and again he caught my eye and gave me a soulful nod. I hope I’m not just imagining things. Adrian Brody please stop stalking me. You have an Oscar what do you need a tranny for? After the flicker we went to Greenblatts for some bodacious bagle and Lox. Yummy! Who did i see again but Adrian Brody. He actually came up to me and introduced himself, and asked did he know me? I said no, and gave him a flier for Bricktops, wonder if he'll come? Probably not.
The Camp movie was cute. Not that deep, but some charming young performers who were very nice on the eye. Its sort of like a Fame update. They should have went more the All That Jazz route.

Lilli Marlene you are the dream. My Marlene Deitrich evening at Bricktops was brilliantina! I really had a wonderful time and it was inspiring to see so many people dressed, dressed and then dressed. My clubnite certainly ups the anti when it comes to an evening on the town. Well its the conceptualist in me, that can never be fully contained. Richard Velasco let me wear this sequined gown he designed on the bias cut. Talk about form fitting, it was like I was sewn into it and propped on stage. Just like Marlene back in the day. Dick also let me borrow some Harry Winston jewels from his collection. I felt nervous with all that ice, like I needed a bodyguard or something. I hardly ever wear jewelry in or out of drag. Our special guest performer was Lola Tawdry the great great granddaughter of Marlene Deitrich who came all the way from Berlin to sing "Falling in Love Again" She looked spectacular and really wowed the crowd. The partygoers included The delicious Poubelle Twins, Michelle Carr of the Velvet Hammer, deathrock icon David J of Bauhaus, cute and cuddly Michael Kenny, the director of Klasky Cheapo’s Ruggratts Movie, Nora of the Centimeters with actor Romain Daris of the new Kate Hudson film Le Divorce, Mexican soap opera studkin and star of the sexy foreign offering "Lucia, Lucia"--- Kuno Becker who was part of gifted NYC writer Nicole Blackman posse , and a very chubby and sweet mannered Stephen Baldwin youngest member of the famous Baldwin clan who said that seeing Mr. Uncertain sing was better than the pizza pie he had eaten at Mulberry Street Pizzaria in Bev Hills earlier in the eve, he was with some interscope Records honcho’s who didn’t quite understand the 1920s goings on and felt just a wee bit out of their elementa. I have to give special props to Don and Augusta for creating the visual spendor of a proper Marlene installation with their gorgeous array of rare posters and memorabilla plus the giveaway feather boas, garter belts with Bricktop emblazened on them and post cards. Augusta even had the gorilla outfit from the Hot VooDoo/Blue Angel number. Yowzina!!!! It was just the perfect evening. My spies will give me a fuller account of who was there later in the week, so stay tuned to this blog for more detailas, ok?
Mr. Uncertain got so drunk at Bricky's that he had to sleep over at Lord Andrew of Gould's Harper Avenue compound. In the morning Lenny the young elder treated us both to a nice breaky at Hugo's. And Mr. Uncertain had heads spinning as he came into the eatery in his dandy attire.

Andrew of Gould and I took visiting dignitary Joel Gibb of Toronto’s hot new band The Hidden Cameras to Laguna Beach. We drove the long way down Pacific Coast Highway and stopped for eats in Huntington Beach. I forgot just how beachy HB is. Lots of hot young powerfully built surfer dudes. All that swimming in the ocean depths sure produces muscle bodies that glimmer in a way that gay gym rabbits just can’t reproduce. Being in HB also reminded me how out of the loop of the mainstream world I am. I have no affinity for the beach or the so-called "Southern California Lifestyle" of surf, sun and the like . . . I am truly a creature of my own construct. Andrew and Joel also looked out of place. Andrew is British and has the whitest, milkiest skin I’ve ever seen. Joel is almost as pale and was wearing cargo shorts, wallabees, a pink shirt and a thick blue madrigal tie. I adore Canucks. They are crazed perfection in a way Americans can't even contemplate.

Thank god it was an overcast day. I cannot stand being in the sun. Once we got to Laguna Beach proper I couldn’t remember how to find the gay beach. Leave it to me to not be able to connect with "The Gays" . I hardly ever go to the beach, and when I do go its maybe twice a year if that with my production designer friend Jose Montana and since I don’t drive I hardly pay attention to landmarks, and the gay beach in Laguna is a little off the beaten path. We wound up laying down in an area near The Boom Boom Room with all these blondine families. It was icky. We made one more attempt to find the gay beach and even asked directions as the porno room across the street from the Boom Boom and their adjoining sex motel, but still couldn’t find the homo sands. Just as well, we settled on a stretch of beach that was extremely private, with the only eye candy being a lanky morose life guard. We still had a good time and driving back we ate in "J" town at the Japa diner Sahiro and saw the most gorgeous boy eating alone. The kid was certainly a treat to behold. Because of traffic I missed going to see my former LA Weekly colleague Donnell Alexander read from his new book Ghetto Celebrity at Book Soup. I’ll have to catch him the next time.
Went to writer Lisa Teasley’s birthday dinner at her lush Laurel Canyon home. I love her Panama Haiti mom Vi and sister Laura who I turned into a performer by becoming "Mack Mama" at Spicy Beef Curtains. It was great seeing Ms. Kateri Butler and her man Brendan Mullen, and Henry Peck who Ron Athey and I hardly get a chance to hang out with anymore. Of course the conversation eventually turned to talk of James Frankenstone and Joseph Louise Brooks who is Henry’s ex. I guess Frankenstone is continuing his slide into the abyss. The poor boy. I remember when he was a gawky trendy teen from Arcadia just happy to be someplace. LA and the clubworld has totally destroyed him, along with a nasty Crystal Meth addiction. I’ve had my bone of contention with him over the years mainly because he’s so cheap and as a club promoter doesn’t like paying performers, but he’s paid for his sins against me, and others three times over so I really hold no anamosity towards him. But Joseph Brooks is another story. He’s an equally stingy club promoter when it comes to paying performers and that is a pet peeve of mine, but he’s been angry at me for a few years because I called him out in print about his cheap ways and youth culture vulturism. When he was the king of LA underground clubs the true visionary behind his kingdom was his lover Henry. Joseph does have good taste in music, and he is extremely good looking---I’ll graciously give him that, and now he has a wealthy boyfriend and lives a comfortable lifestyle, while i live hand-to-mouth. Joseph even grifted his way into becoming the artistic director(i use the word artistic lightly) at the Key Club on the Sunset Strip, that use to be Gazzarri’s. But he’s still holding a grudge against me because I think he feels that I had something to do with an article in Index Mag about him getting killed. I was an editor at Index, but I didn’t have that much power. Steve La Freniere wrote the piece and enjoyed his interview with Joseph. I didn’t even bad mouth him to Steve, which I could have easily done, but I felt it wasn’t my place. Steve even asked me if he should interview Joseph and I told him that he would make a good interviewee. But Joseph tried to get me kicked off of the bill opening up for Siouxie and the Banshees and even bad mouthed me to my record company. I’m on the same label as Siouxie. Well his mechanations backfired because it made Siouxie and Budgie like me even more and I actually went over quite well performing for their crowd. Joseph would hate it if he knew that I also got a publishing deal through Universal Music. But even though he bares nothing but ill will towards me and wants me to falter, I actually don’t wish him any harm. I’m sure his own Karma will do him in without me putting him on my Madame Mau list of people that I will eventually destroy. He's a bad egg but not that bad---just annoying.
One person who is certainly on my madame Mao list is Roberta who use to be the Operations Mgr at Outfest. She purposely tried to sabotage Platinum Oasis last year by getting an inferior sound system for the event when a top of the line system for the Conga Room had already been secured, she was angry that Ron blew up at her at a last minute meeting at Eat Well. I believe it was then that she decided to get even and try and ruin Platinum Oasis. So it may take me 30 years but Roberta will not survive my wrath. I’m also upset with Shari who allowed Roberta to have so much power in the first place. From the beginning i was wary about working with an organization like Outfest. They are just too L7.

Both years Ron and I did Platinum Oasis, aspects of the event were diminished by Roberta and Shari was the enabler. Of course Shari is completely unaware that she is guilty of major wrongdoing. I think that in her subconscience Shari’s ego was a bit bruised that the two Platinum Oasis’ became the Ron Athey and Vaginal Davis show. That is why this year she basically orchestrated the event, calling it Platinum Snapmeat. Which has to be the worst title i have ever heard, and making the thrust more Cyber Punk Lesbiana. I’m glad she took over the event, because now she knows just what it takes to do live art as opposed to programming movies. From all accounts told to me the Platinum Snapmeat was pretty mediocre, but so is Outfest, thats why its best that they stick to the status quo and Ron and I will go elsewhere where our talents and creative imput is better appreciated.
Oh in that same note: My assistant emailed me this letter from one disgruntled patron of Platinum Snapmeat:

Vag all I want to say is that you were sorely missed at this year's Platinum event. To put it mildly, it SUCKED GIANT DONKEY DICK (and not in a good way).

I don't think I'm alone when I say that it was on the buzz/word of mouth of the last two Platinum events that brought the crowds into this year's SnapMeat. We were lured into going by the naive notion that this year's event would keep in the Vag Davis/Ron Athy spirit. Alas, we were misguided.

2003 Platinum was an unmitigated disaster from beginning to end. The SnapMeat concept was utterly confusing; the verbose 2-page rule book was of no help (the 3 volunteers I questioned, couldn't explain it because they weren't quite sure themselves of what was going on). The entire event was poorly organized (they ran out of booze around 11:30 and refused to give booze ticket holders our money back!) And did I mentioned it was stupefying BORING??? People wandered around looking for something to do. Few danced due to the bad NRG WeHo crap circuit music. And for the most part the installations were flat, uninteresting and lacked originality. Unlike your past events, SnapMeat had virtually no interactive aspects. Worse of all, the entire event was devoid of the sexy energy you created two years running at the Coral Sands!!!!

Not surprisingly, me and my gaggle of gays couldn't get out of there faster. We weren't alone... as we exited the Ambassador, another large crowd of exiting attendees were warning incoming to save their money and not go in! (Side note: The Ambassador Hotel's history and/or legends played no part whatsoever in this event. SnapMeat as conceptualized and executed could have taken place in just about any Ralph's Supermarket parking lot. To tease us with this beguiling landmark and not use it was just plain cruel.) Pity, a lost opportunity.

Anywhoooooo, we're all hoping that you come back and take helm of this event next year. Thanks for all you've done!


Sincerely,

Ali R.


Remember a few days ago I mentioned that a gay activist in New York didn’t appreciate my essay on Gay Marriage that was part of the LA Weekly cover package. Well said activisist Jay Blotcher sent me a little emug to reiterate his concerns. I remit it for your discerning eye:

cherished vag

remember the childhood game called telephone -- where people would whisper a
message down the line?

when it got to the last person, we found out how mangled the original
message had become? and laughed and laughed?

well -- i wanted to respond to your blog item about me

granted, it came to you through our dear glenn belverio

but it lost oodles in the translation a la "telephone"

allow me to explain what needled me about your LA Weekly essay

you were invoking the name of genet to justify your stance against marriage

well - sheesh -- let's talk apples vs oranges, eh?

genet, like most staggering geniuses and sexual obsessives, was one of the
most selfish people on earth

he treated his grand black men like sexual totems. like picasso, his many
romances had very little to do with love or consistency or kindness

so - how could marriage even be on his wavelength? it went against all he
held dear (himself, for one)

the institution of marriage requires mutual respect and gentility and a
downsized ego to make it work

it would NEVER work for him nor for picasso nor for any other number of
renegades

not because they were above it -- but because they could not focus long
enough to care about another person deeply enough

(or because they were too interested in where their next piece of cock/pussy
was coming from)

you pointed out, as well, that marriage would not work for the peripatetic
vag and her voracious sexual appetite

well, sweetie-pie -- as you may not know: marriage is really not about
sex... nor monogamy, officially

marriage is an arrangement that can exist outside of a sexual vibe

or exist hand in hand with a lot of sex on the outside

but so few marriages maintain sex

in your essay, you belittle marriage as a bougie construct

but when you consider the legal benefits -- it is not something to dismiss
with a sneer

and when all is said and done, even if you accuse gay men of little
imagination if they want to marry -- why spit on the whole concept just to
pump your own self-worth? or labruce's?

i just thought your column was more glib than edifying -- more dismissive
than constructive

one can certainly argue that all licenses and legal matters should be
consigned to the dustheap

in fact, so did the Gay Liberation Front in NYC and LA in the 70s

but you know what? -- they self-destructed, alas

and what rose in their stead were gay groups aimed at working within the
system for inclusion

i will be the first to tell you hat i am dismayed by the capitalistic,
conservative bent of most (middle- and upper-middle) class gays these days

ugh - gays in the military. gay merchandising. gay moneymakers

but marriage is chiefly about love - and perhaps a measure of financial
security and certainly legal rights

it is simply too easy to sneer at it; the matter is far more compelling

thanks for hearing me out

jay blotcher
former activist queen
now happily ensconced in high falls, new york
with my husband, brook garrett
(officially married oct 2000 in VT)


Had a glorious dinner at Richard Velasco’s lovely compound on Hayworth Street in West Hollywood. Dick lives in a beautiful 20’s deco apartment that is beyond compare. I’ve known Mr. V. forever. He use to do the display production design for Fiorucci’s in Bev Hills and also Maxfield’s where he created his legend. He is also an incredible stylist, make-up, hair and costume designer. There is nothing he can’t do. We had a wonderful time reminiscing about 25 years of LA history. He even has a cute little dog named Moses. I’m going to have Dickie do some installations at Bricktop’s. the world needs to rediscover his genius.

what a week i've had. been somewhat irritable because of all the miami beach like humidity. i hope its not like this the whole summer. Little Jewban from Havana Javier Peres of Peres Projects gallery took me to din at Musso and Franks. We had a wonderful time, though the air conditioner in the bar area is weak. I was sweating up a storm. The only good thing about all the humidity is that its good for my skin. I'm looking quite lovely these days. Javier's gallery is really getting a lot of ink and is being talked about as one gallery the represents the hottest art boys. Its about time someone came along and infused some new young energy on the tepid art scene in LA. I'm going to see if the Arts Editor of the LA Weekly will write something about Peres Projects.
My drink from the Musso bar was a Manhattan. It was perfect. Our waiter was a bit of a grinch, but the food was delish in that comfort way i crave so often. Sitting across from us was ugly old Alan Alda and when we were in the bar sitting next to me on the next stools were the guys from that drab band Matchbox 22. There's always someone of note at Musso. The olde Hollywood guard go there and have been going there since 1919, but then all the new kids wanting hip credibility also make it a pitstop.
Bricktops Cole Porter Titty Sucking Extravaganza went over really well. A photographer from Los Angeles Magazine came by to snap everyone's pics and people were dressed really well. I love this fetish model girl named Pandora. She's adorable looking. Shauno Leoni set up a 20s boutique with her unique designs. She is very talented and is always dressed to the T's. That snooty actress Kate Beckinsale who was really good in that movie The Last Days of Disco came to Bricky's with members of her family and Chloe Sevigny. She was wearing a pretty beaded gown and was even dancing up a storm with Mr. Uncertain. But looking even sexier and pert was Audrey Tatou from Amelie fame. She didn't stay long. I guess the LA Magazine photographer scared her, but she did hear me sing, and i was in good form. I felt really pretty. Glen Meadmore did my face and Miss Morgan of Omaha Nebraska made me this gorgeous lavender dress with intricate baubbles in a layered pattern. I overwhelmed the crowd. Miss Morgan is one talented coutourier. She use to be a model, but is now a student at Otis Parsons. i gaurantee she is going places. Her beau is very handsome as well. I'd like to strip him naked.
I got so many compliments on my singing and outfit that now my head is mongoloid sized. Also hanging out at Bricky's checking the scene out were regular Bibbe Hansen and Sean Carrillo, Richard Velasco looking very dapper in his vintage summer suit, Mark Simon and his The Boyfriend/Leave it to Jane posse, Abbie Travis looking very Ziegfeld Follies and Charlie's Angels designer Michael Schmidt, humpy latino actor Freddy Rodriguez from Six Feet Under, boyish Devon Gummersall of My So Called Life and Joel Gibb of the super hot Toronto folk/queer band The Hidden Cameras. I thought he was going to want to perform, but he was out for some art shindig at the STandard and just came to chill. Joel is so cute and adorable, lanky and lovesexy. We hit it off immediately. After Bricktops Andrew and i took him to The Tom Kat Porno Cinema, which was really doing some brisk horndog business. I've never seen it like that. And it wasn't filled with just trolls. Really cute boys. I was the only girl in the place but it didn't put a damper on their lust. Several guys complimented me as the most beautiful woman they have ever seen. The mgr said that the old queen that use to own it is gone. Thats a good sign. Maybe Ron Athey and i will get to have a Spicy Beef Curtain event held there one day. We sat in the auditorium for a while on the semen covered seats and some guys started giving Joel and speed rush blow job. He started then stopped then ran off, then came back. So LA. Andrew was attacked in the bathroom by 20 inches of jubas jubilee cock. these two black stalions with hard muscle bodies put the heavy mack daddy make on him. I was exhausted and just wanted to go get some sleep so i finally coaxed the boys out. I still didn't wind up getting to bed until almost 5am after taking off my make-up. Maybe i ate my makeup.
The next morning Lenny and I took Joel to eat breaky at Hugo's. It was filled with so many Los Ang types. Gay pretty titties and tanning salon straight actorette couples. I'm glad Joel got to see and whiff it all in. Later Ron Athey came by with Crepe Suzette and we took Joel to the I Martin bike shop where i was getting my vintage Western Flier bike repaired. There is a cute humpy dork boy that works at the bike shop who is perfect for Suzette. She needs to get down on that one. We then went to Ron's Studio and hung out a bit, then had a Thai meal at Sampoon across from the Gauntlet II and drove to Chung King Road to see Javier's latest show at Peres Projects, but got there too late. He had vamoosed. Monday Andrew will take us to Laguna Beach. that should be fun.

o i forgot to write last week that when i went to the MC Hammer Museum with Larry Bob i also got to see their permanent collection which has some impressive stuff like Van Gogh's and shit. That MC Hammer is one fine art collecting baggy pants wearing rapper/minister.
Oh and at Bricktops Creekbird performed and he is a sheer delight. He use to be in several bands that played at Sucker so i knew he'd put on a good show. He was dressed like Alan Quarterman 19th Century explorer and had on stage his valet, his butler, his mistress and his musical chimp who was packing one mighty fine erection on him. Also the Fishnet Floozies and their hot rock-a-billy fans were celebrating their birthday and boy did they bring some hot boys with them. yums. one even danced with me and he was the perfect lead. also joining in on the celebration my performance art daddykin Ron Athey with Kid Congo Powers of Gun Club and Nick Cave fame, Miss Abbie Travis looking resplendid in vintage finery, Stuart Townsend from that movie The Distinguished Gentleman's club and Willliam Lee Scott who played a sexy wigger in the film Black & White. William requested that i play Ill Wind from Cotton club and of course i did. This week the Canadian band The HIdden Cameras may make a surprise appearance. I hope so.

Larry Bob and Lord Andrew and I went to dinner at that fancy vegan restaurant on La Cienega that is called Our Daily Planet or Daily Bread or something like that. The place was chock filled with celebs ranging from the tired Hilton Sisters to Anthony and Flea of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers and Rick Rubin. Flea caught a glimpse of me and gave me a dirty look. He doesn't like me ever since i wrote in Fertile La Toyah Jackson magazine about his male hustler past when he was kept by new wave R&B Singer Gary Allen back in the early 80s. He's never forgiven me, and always gives me shade, which i promptly give right back. i've never been a big fan of their group. Always thought they were overrated, but i did like the title of one of their more recent CD's called Californication. That was clever. I'll give them that. And John Fruciante is extremely talented, he use to be really cute when he first joined the band.
After dinner we went by tired Amoeba Records. I hate that store. Its too big, though there are a lot of cute boys roaming the isles----i'll give it that. Ran into Tyrone the Baptiste aka Dave Cunningham. He is so cute and adorable. I've known him since he was 15, and i still have a mild crush on him. He's in the band the Sugerplastics that use to be on Geffen Records.
After the record store we went to Peanuts to see the tranny show starring Viva Sex. Ms. Viva i've known since 1975. She is one of the original Cosmetics, and is also one of the premiere Madonna impersonators as well as Gloria Estevan impersonator. She even toured with Gloria. I love how Viva is giving Madonna realness the way Madonna should properly visualized with a rough hewn cunty edge. One of the girls in Viva's drag review is named Delta Work and she is a hot hoot. She came on doing Anna Nicole and was pure geniustrata. I love the scene at Peanuts on Monday nights. All the tranny in their full regalia and the t ranny chasers who love them. Its one of the best and illest scenes in LA and a must to any newcomer to los ang trying to figure the town out.
The next day Larry and i ate breakfast at Swingers. Which has a large vegetarian menu. The food is actually really good there, but i can't stand the rock n roll vibe of the place and some of the people who go there and work there. But early in the morning its not bad.
Larry wanted to see the Christian Marclay exhibit at the MC Hammer Museum in Westwood. I loved the video art the best. It was so Ann Miller. We hung around UCLA so i could troll the cute frat boys. The westside is so boring---nothing ever changes. I've always wanted to give it some credit but since the 70's there is still that stale vibe. At least the weather was a lot cooler. We came back to the MC Hammer later in the evening to catch Dennis Cooper and Christopher Russell read.
I met Christopher when he brought me out to Art Center for a visiting artist last year. He's a sweet young kid and read an explosive short story. I love people who are damaged in all the right ways. I also love Christopher's hesitant persona.
He provided a nice companion to Dennis Cooper's excerpt from his new novel The Crowd Pleaser, which is definately that, and a great new direction for Mr. Cooper. He's actually writing about adults, and its so exciting and invigorating, plus funny as all hell. Dennis' reading style is also magnifique. Steady and deliberate and never shrill, he hits all the right notes and makes all the moves. I'm so glad that i was able to attend, it really was inspiring.
Larry left for San Fran on Wednesday. I sort of hijacked him to stay a few days extra since i just love his companionship. It was almost like being married. I'm very bossy, but Larry loves it. Had lunch with beautiful Ceasar Vega, who use to be a Club Sucker regular. He took me to Musso and Frank on Hollywood Blvd. Its my favorite old school eatery. The place has class class and more class. I ordered the Cesar salad with grilled chicken. Yumsickle!
Mr. Vega was looking very good. He is one hot Papi and has such a delicious casual vibe about him that makes you feel real comfortable in his presence. If i ever had a boyfriend, which i never will it would be someone like Ceasar. He has such great energy surrounding him.
He and another Club Sucker regular Dan Perreira have written a script that they want me to participate in. I'm flattered. The action takes places around me and my shenanigans at the club. I can't wait to read it. My Vaginal enfluence resonates in ways i never expect.
Before Larry Bob came down to visit i met a handsome young scandanavian man. I don't want to say too much about him, because i don't want to jinx the relationship, its all so fresh and new. I'm glad i had Larry as a distraction so i didn't get all caught up in this new person in my life and ruin it with my demanda ways. Its best to play it too cool for drool. But of course that is always very difficult for a girl like me. Stay tuned as things develop.

Was talking to my New York guru of all things, Glenn Belverio aka: Glennda Orgasm and he relayed to me that Jay Blotcher a former Man!hattan activist queen who now lives in upstate NY was livid about my gay marriage piece in the weekly. He said, "How dare she evoke Genet! In her snide essay. Genet was the most sexually selfish person that ever existed."
I guess I pushed a button someplace.

Been getting a lot of emails and calls about my Style piece on Super Post Ghetto Fab.

Larry Bob or as I like to call him Larry HobGoblin came down from San Fran to visit me. Its wonderful having him in Los Ang taking care of the doll. I am such a needy lady. We ran down La Jolla way to get some free editing time from yet another acquaintance who has promised to help me finish my Berlin movie project of two years ago. Got back in time for Larry to go catch the tail end of a Bar B Q at Dave White and Alfonso Duralde’s and also to go to Scutterfest. I had to get ready for Bricktops in awful 90 degree weather. Nothing puts me in a funk like summer heat. I was surprised that people had energy after Bar B Q-ing and fireworks displays to do the Bricky thing, but it was a cute crowd. Ebony Jett one of the sweetest queens of the new York scene who lives here now came by. I adore her. She was in the touring company of the broadway musical Rent, and let me tell you this soul sister can saaaang. Also Tommy Gear of the Screamers came by with artist Doug Gorden. Tommy is art directing a book that will have photos by his ex-lover Lyle Ashton Harris with text by Anne Deveare-Smith. Anything that Tommy touches is incredible. Tommy is one of the main reasons that Lyle is doing well in the art world.
Also met this documentary filmmaker girlie who is related to that hunky Joseph Fiennes. She told me she has a movie about South Central Los Angeles and that she did a docu on dancer Michael Clark and that he has finally kicked his heroin problem. She hinted that she wanted to do a documentarty on me, but not before i do my own. Hahaha.
LarryBob and i got togther with his friend Trebor the writer. Trebor is hilarious. I like his new all grey hair look. Its very distinguished in that Richard Gere-ish way. We all had a delish luncheon at the Krishna Temple in West LA. We had a hard time finding the damn place. I hadn't been there in ages. the food is really tasty and some of those Hari Krish boys running around in sandles are mighty yummy on the eye. Yahoo!
We also went by Beyond Baroque in Venice. Hadn't been there since the early 90s when i did a reading with Reza Abdul. The place kind of lost its cache. I think they still put on stuff, but it just had this new agey Bohdi Tree feeling about it that was kind of icky. I'm glad we left. Larry went off to Scutterfest at the Knitting Factory and of course that left me time to troll. It wasn't my night for getting nookie so i went to Miss Spotlight to have a dozen drinks to wash out my sorrows and meet up with LarryBob. We ran into the divine Richard Velasco at the spotlight and i knew he and Larry would hit it off talking about the old days of LA and San Fran underground. Not only did Richard do the windows of the famed Maxfield's store but also Fiarucci's in Beverly Hills which i think is now a bank. I remember when that building was a second run movie theatre. I've gotta stop dating myself.

Saw Terminator 3-Rise of the homemade Rage against the machines. Love love Nick Stahl. He is a juicemonger. Whats happened to poor Clair Danes. She looks olde enough to play Nick's mom. Her acting was fantastic, but how is it that she's aged so much? I guess she just has that kind of white skin that is prone to looking haggy beyond its time. The same with Kirstin Dunst who is only 21 or so but looks 37. I'm certainly no teenager myself, but on a good day i can really give a semblance of youth. I actually enjoyed the Terminator movie and President Arnold----yes give him a few years and he'll either be a Jesse Ventura-esque governor, president or fascist dictator.

Summer is really here now. I hate hot weather. Its depressing. The only good thing about it is that a lot of sexy boys are wearing less on Hollywood Blvd and that is nice to see. Went to the movies to escape the mid day heat. Saw the new Charlie's Angels sequel, and i was amused by it. Its quite the trifle though. Justin Thoroux has a great body playing a gangland Mick, i met him once through margaret Cho, she brought him as her date to Club Sucker years ago. Seeing him in the movie made me want to chow down. I also love the young ingenue Shia LeBouf who was in the film Holes. He reminds me of my old paramour Alfie Botello when he was that age. Ran into Alfie's childhood pal Travis downtown a few months back. He seems sad and forelorn. It was good seeing him. I guess Alfie is in LA a lot trying to sell screenplays. Maybe one day he'll want to connect with me again. I feel like our paths will definately cross when i least expect it. I still have great feelings for him. Not exactly love. I'll never be IN LOVE with someone, but i do have this attraction to him that will never go away. Probably he senses that and is not anxious to tread that path on any level. I don't blame him. I'm too much of a handful for anyone, even maintaining a friendship with me can be difficult as i'm extremely demanding on all accounts. I'd love to see Alfie's wife. I hear she looks just like me, but is white. Freud would have a field day with that, eh?

was reading the cover story of Spin Magazine that my friend Brendan Mullen wrote about the history of Jane’s Addiction. Pretty damn good. That Brendan has a wry way around the oral history reportage. Reading the article brought back a lot of memories of the period. I was around a lot of the incidents relayed, especially the section about Psi Com, Perry’s first band who I always felt were more interesting then Jane’s Addiction. The best thing about Jane’s was the name. I was the one who introduced Perry Farrell to Ziola Blue aka: Lisa. She was an Orange County teenager from a wealthy family who was a wild free spirit and hung out with these two other teens Mischa and Ix aka: Steffan. I don’t know what ever became of Mischa, but Ix is now living in Hawaii I believe, with another old acquaintance from long ago named Buck. Xiola was quite the beauty, but had a drug problem par viatria. When she was in rehab she would send me some of the funniest letters which I still have in storage. The last time I saw Perry was at Beck birthday party. We really didn’t have much to say to each other than, "Hi". He was always a bit of a sponge who absorbed from everyone he met. But back then he was affable if not a bit hippy dippy. By the time he was living in that house on Wilton Place with the entire band, he had some kind of sexual Svengali control over them, especially Eric Avery and Dave Novarro. Perry does have a giant thick dick, and at that time all the boys in his band got to chug a lug of it, but after a while he couldn’t manipulate them anymore with his cock. The boys were all at least 10 years younger then him and very impressionable as they were suburban and Jane’s Addiction was their first parlay into the underground scene. Dave Novarro and Stephen Perkins are still very suburban in their tastes. Thats uber obvious with Dave going out with tired Carmen Electra and all the other skinny brittle blondes before her. He’s really a butch bottom and wants a boy with a big dick like Perry but can’t admit it. Jane’s opened up for my band The Afro Sisters twice. At a theoretical party at the Park Plaza formerly the Elks Lodge and then at this BBQ party below the Detour in Silverlake. One Jane got a following and clicked Glen Meadmore opened up for them at the Scream Club and was boo'd off stage by the bratty Valley and Orange County poser weenagers. of course crazy Glen loved it.

Dadster Athey had cooked one of his superlative feasts. Talk about eating good just the way I like it. Food is much more reliable then sex. Had a hilarious chit chat with Gwen Turner the glorious star of such films as Chasing Amy and Go Fish. Gwen is certainly one of the smartest women I know and never fails in making me laugh out loud. Her male husband is professor Jose Munoz of NYU. They even had a commitment ceremony on fire island recently, and are writing a screenplay together. Gwen’s latest project is a lesbian version of Queer is Folk that stars Jennifer Beals, Pam Grier and I kidyounot Snoop Doggy Dog. Leave it to Gwen. I also did something I have never done in my life and that is: toot cocaine. Yes the original anti-drug lady actually put cocaine up her lovely nostrils. Oh whats the big deal? It actually wasn’t bad. I didn’t even do a full line of it, but I did feel something and it was pleasant. Now I’m a bona fide cocaine whore. Next on my list is ecstacy, then crack, crystal meth, pcp, ghb, and heroin. I’ve sure waited late in life to experiment with drugs. But hey, I’m a late bloomer. I was a little afraid it would give me a heart attack but both Ron who is AA and Rage(his next door neighbor) swore to me that I wouldn’t go into cardiac arrest. I certainly did feel a rush, but it leaves the system pretty fast and I actually got a really good night sleep from it. Who would have thought?
Spent the day with Fertile La Toyah Jackson at her new Pasadena compound. She is a high falutin homeowner with a lovely two bedroom house over near the RoseBowl Swap Meet. Im so proud of my lady Fertile. Gawd. I’m the only one who is broken down living in tired tiny flats with nothing I can call my own. I’d sure love to own a home, but unless I marry Prince William I don’t see that happening anytime soon. Edith invited me and Fertile to dinner at her pretty hilltop Glassell Park estate. Her 3 year old daughter Eva is really cute, looks just like Edith’s handsome Aryan husband Steve who use to be in the band The Vandals. Steve is one hot big dicked German. Ya Volt! He has a son from a previous relationship who is 16 and is also a hunk. You know you’re old when all your friends either own houses or have children who are almost grown. We watched a bootleg copy of that new movie by Danny Boyle "28 Days Later" Really scary. I hope I don’t run into any zombies, or if I do I don’t want them to munch on my brains, just my titties. Hahahahahaha!!!!
Went by Frank Rodriguez and Jeffreyland Hilbert's new design firm Famous. Its really cute right next door to the Gauntlet II. Frank left the security of a job with Sony Pictures to be a partner in Jeffrey’s firm. I’m proud of him for taking such a big risk and finally leaving the corporate world behind. Honey child let me tell you, working for "the Man" gets you nowhere fast. Its best to be an entrepreneur and do it all for yourself. Amen.

Something strange was definately in the air last night. People were acting very bizarre. Talked to Maxmillian(Ron Athey's Swiss/German beau) this morning. He works at the Gold Coast Saloon on Santa Monica Blvd and he said that everyone coming into the pub last night from 8pm to closing at 2am was a freak-n-weirdo. At Bricktops after 12:30 there was this odd group of people who were celebrating a birthday. I did a happy b-day announcement for them to make them feel special, but then they took it one step further and were trying to hijack the stage and put on their own show. Talk about being a little presumpteous. Of course i had to do some ghetto chick to check. And earlier in the eve that friend of cute tiny latin Jorge, brought these really loud girls from Miami or some such place, one was asking the bar tender to give her free drinks. What was that all about?
Jorge's friend last week was throwing glasses across the room. I've never seen him so drunk and out of it. He's a heavy drinker but usually holds it a lot better. He and Jorge were regular's at my old club Sucker at the Garage. They would hag this insane south bay character named Jed who was always putting on tired clubs at the Garage with no name bands. Jed was somewhat goodlooking back then in a dirty surfer/skater kind of way, but he was forever bugging me to help him attract an audience. He 'd play the old i'm somewhat attracted to you game, and would even whip out his rather plump penis to try to hook me in to his web. That would have worked on me maybe 20 years ago. Lately Jed has gained ALot of weight and just looks like a scraggly middle aged white man. He tried talking to me at the first Bricktops, but i just rolled my eyes. He's come to Brickys a few other times since January when we went weekly. I think he sells drugs, i use to see him hanging around my old Koreatown neighborhood with some pretty dodgy characters and he looked like he was up to no good. In fact during one Bricktops when Leave it to Jane performed he was heckling me. I don't mind people heckling but he would try to hide in the crowd when others were hushing him. If you're going to heckle at least own up to it. He hasn't been around lately and Jorge even says that he's "No Good" so i hope he stays buried somewhere under a rock in San Pedro or Torrance.
This week at Bricky's Weba Garretson performed as part of a record and video preview with her musical group Eastside Sinfionetta. Weba has a wonderful singing voice and is one of LA's premiere Kurt Weill interpreters. The crowd this week was older and more sophisticated. Bibbe Hansen and Sean Carrillo were looking very elegant and stately, every inch the bohemian royals that they are. Also Abby Travis came by wearing a sexteel vintage dom outfit. Her companion was one of the sons of the group Los Lobos, who is in the nutty chicanismo punk band Los Villains. Fog aka Andrew Broder was making some serious moves on Lady Charity's cute blondine boyfriend Dax. It was Dax's last time at Bricktops, he's going to be living in New York for a while before starting school in the fall at Berkeley. I'm going to miss him Alot. He's adorably sweet with big juicy tight titties. Next week is Charities last in LA. She's going to be doing some soul searching and traveling around the world. Charity is the Parlour's Mgr Andrew Gould's wife, but they have a very very open modern relationship. Andrew has a boyfriend and several other female and transgendered spouses. Andrew is English with a penis that is very long and thick, so he needs a lot sexual attention from many genders to satisfy is genormous sexual thirts. I was eyeing cute young actor trent ford who comes from the super rich car manufacturing family. I love heirs to a fortune. Was introduced to director Danny Boyle who was at Bricky's with the stars of his latest film, the name of which i forget, but the picture is about Zombies or something like that. I'm just glad he brought pretty cillian murphy and manly christopher eccleston with him to the club. I've heard that Mr. Boyle's new movie will make up for that awful one he did with Leonardo DiCap. While i was singing a 20s version of the GoGo's, "This Town" Cillian Murphy sang along in an animated fashion. Too bad he left right after my show, i wanted to try and get him to sit on my face.

Received tons of phone calls and emails concerning my essay on Gay Marriage that is part of the cover package of the LA Bleekly. Funny what stories of mine capture people's fancy. Oh I'm still getting proposals, emugs and phone calls from a lot of people thinking that me and Ron are doing Platinum Oasis this year for Outfest. I'm sooooo embarrased that everyone thinks that Platinum Snapmeat is our creation. Well those who really know the quality of our work know that we could never come up with something so purile, but everyday now Its getting scarier and scarier. Oh welpsis what can i do.

A day should have 72 hours in it not 24. My life is moving at candlelabra speed. Have a million writing assignment deadlines including an essay on Gay Marriage and a Ghetto Fabulous Style piece for Ms. LA Bleekly. And i also have to get my UR Chicago column out, and I'm doing something for Vogue and GQ with Lily Braindrop nee Burana. Lily is all mainstream these days working for GQ, Spin, Elle and Esquire. She has left the zine world far behind. Her Magazine back then, Taste of Latex was really cool.

Talked to my fashion guru Glenn Belverio, who is the global editrix of the world. Glenn not only was the New York Editor of Dutch, but also writes for Marie Clair, Hong Kong's WestEast and Conde Nast Traveler. He also put me in contact with Mr. Style who works for P. Diddy aka Puff Daddy's clothing line Sean Jean and Everlast. His real name is Gregory something or other.

Was supposed to go to Vansterdam to finally edit my movie La Petite Tonkinese that i filmed two years ago in Berlin. A friend of mine who works for a post production house will give me some free editing time. My Canadian gallery is paying for the travel because they want first dibs on the flick. Well my pal had to cancel at the last minute because he got some major paying job, but hopefully it will work out during the summer weeks to follow. I've waited this long.

So glad i was available to go see Le Tigre at the MusicBox/Henry Fonda Theatre in Hollywood. The girls opened up for Yo Le Tengo. I left before Yo Le Tengo went on. They are dull live. This band from Australia was also on the bill. Talk about three different audiences that did not go together. Of course Le Tigre stole the show with their snappy music and tight visual packagina. The first band, The Clean were boring Aussie's who were ugly as all getout. I brought David Pendleton from The Boyfriend and Kent William Albin, who use to be the Minister of Information with Fischerspooner. Kent is a very sweet kid, and the night before came to Bricktops, which was literally on fire with a performance by Mr. Tin Pan Alley, Richard Halperin. Belinda Carlisle also came to Bricktops and was dancing around and acting all lesbianica like she use to do back in the old punk days at the Whisky a-go-go with Alice Bag. I haven't seen Belinda in ages and we had a nice little kissy kissy reunion. Belinda also got to be frisky with Jane Cantillon and Bibbe Hansen. Dancing up a storm to some music brought by Brad Kay who accompanied Mr. Halperin on piano and sang a ditty with Mr. UnCertain was fashionkalada Anna Piaggi, Alex De Betak and lovesexy Olivier Theyskens, who showed me his nice plump dick in the DJ booth.
This morning i met with Lady Bunny for breakfast at the Summerfield Suites in Weho. She was brought out to perform at Gay Pride on Sunday. Eating breakfast right next to us was free style dance artist suprema Shannon of "Let the Mujsic Play" fame and Janice Robinson and Thea Austin who i'm not familiar with but are big names. Lady Bun Bun told me some gossip about this black tranny who use to be a meatpacking district whore who struck paydirt when she got a rich husband in the form of a Mr. Steinglatz . This Steinglatz is a wealthy Israeli art dealer who was involved in some heinous scandal involving whording Picassos. Well he likes big tranny cock so much that he married this queen and made her his black bertha rich jewish princess bride, and at the height of their relationship they kept mansions in Tel Aviv and Paris and the tranny would wear hifalutin designer clothes mixed with cheap stuff that had stains all over it. They are now divorced, but she still works for one of his business concerns, and puts on these giant parties in some elegant space in Paris and flies out girlfriends like Lady Bunny, Girlina and Amanda LePore as visual stimuli. It all sounds just too sick, but that is the world of my lady B. Last week she even went to Margaret Cho's wedding to Rev' Al from the Cacophony Society. Rev Al also is one of the original gangsters responsible for the tired Burning Man Festival.

Got invited to the Justin Timberlake show by Mr. Timber himself. Who would have ever believed that he was a fan of mine? That boy is filled with surprise and is soooooo cute and put on an incredible show. He wasn’t hogging the spotlight either, which surprised me. He made his back-up band and dancers a major part of the show like an ensemble piece. A very smart move on his part, i might add. There was a wonderous whimsy afloat, all out passion and joy, with no showboating which in a production this mainstream is completely unbelievable. Justin is a kid who definitely is going to grow as a solo artist, at the moment his music is limited but what he showed at this concert makes me feel that he will definitely start writing songs down the line that will have more substance. Maybe I’m just giddy because I got special treatment from such a young darling child. At the after party he even sought me out and flirted, and was affectionate and touchy, but not in a creepy way, he really seemed sincere, and believe you me, I didn’t just fall off that turnip truck and would have felt immediately if he was just going out of his way because he felt it was important to court me to gain underground counterculture credibility, but then again is that soooo bad? His embracing something thats outside of his corporate realm should definitely be applauded. Maybe I’m a crazy troll and a fool, but I did kind of feel a little tranny chasing vibe from him. The boy DID sleep with Janet Jackson, and she’s become such a drag queen that being with me is just a few steps away, eh? *****Oh I should also note that his publicist was not exactly featuring my ghetto realness self, but I just laughed it off. Poor Christina Aguilera. She has a great voice, but is too unfocused. Talk about histrionics. Overkill, overkill, overkill. I do give her props for ridding herself of the blonde bombshell look and she has noticeably gained some well needed curves, which added a resonance to her voice, but she needs to take a few lessons from Justin and in general just tone everything way down all the way to chinatown. I still like Christina more then Britany.
Got a hot emug from Marcu Siegel who is living and loving in Germany with his hot actress girlfriend Susanne Sacche who is the star of Bruce La Bruce’s latest opus Rasberry Reicht which is set in the 70s and is about the Bader/Meinhoff terrorist gang. Marcu is a true libertine. He has a juicy buttery sexylina of a girlfriend and also a studly booty bandit boyfriend named Daniela Romana, who is such the tale tale stud that after he plows his tricks they have to go to the doctor and get their asses sewn back up. Now thats virile. Marcu's missive includes an update on some of the people in Berlin I met when I was stationed there doing a performances for 5 months. I’ll just let you read it in his own sweet words:

I am so lame for not responding sooner to your mail which brought me joy and bonerus erectus. But this past week and a half was very crazy. You see, Susanne's twins celebrated their tenth birthday on one day and then had separate parties on two other days. With the helping out of the lovely single parent S., I was also a bit busy. So
other pleasures fell by the wayside as they say...

Great news that the Fierce Fest will bring you back next Spring. We'd totally love to be a part of it. It would be great. I think the spring will be a good time for us all, so we should be able to do it then. Let me know how things develop and we could chat about it all.

Daniela and S. are meeting regularly to plan our next CHEAP projects. They want to apply for money to fund us, so that we could be independent of all these pesky institutions here. Maybe we could work out something, somehow together here or there as well. With one of the grants, you've got to be all international, so maybe we could get
money to fly our sorry asses to LA or your racehorse ass here. We'll see.

There's so much gossip, and so little time. I'll give you a juicy bit though: So, the thing is Christina, you know from Cheap Jewelry, Susanne's old best friend and everything. She's continued shedding her skin, so that there's only a slimy Eve-y residue remaining. She's all submissive and devoted to that fucked up liberal sorry tired
playwright-director René Pollesch, who has for the past six months come out somewhat sheepishly about the fact that he's got a hustler boyfriend. René's put Gordon, the h.b., into his tired plays this year--the last one starred Volker--all of which talk about his guilt feelings about "buying love, buying true feelings, are they still
real? etc." Pathetic. Anyway, René told Christina that he gave Gordon a job as an actor so that he'd stop hustling. Better a kept actor then a kept whore, I guess. René's so fucked up about sex. Christina told Susanne the other day that René finally broke up with Gordon, because G. was totally unreasonable. He wanted René to buy him a
sportscar. Sounds pretty reasonable to me. Anyway, Christina's totally all judgmental about Susanne's CHEAP club underground success and about her letting herself get deliciously plowed by the well-hung Daniel (not Daniela) in Bruce's new film. Christina tries to think it's all cool and everything, but she can't deal. And Susanne doesn't
really think it's cool or not cool; it just is, you know. Anway, Achmed (you remember him, the sexy fucked up Yemeni-East German boy who Daniela used to fuck) was on a gay chat line the other day and connected with a guy. They got together, jerked off, and were talking. It turns out the guy is a Hustler who was an Actor--"for the
last six months" he said. Achmed said, "you're not with René Pollesch are you?" The guy was like "No, not anymore. I mean, he was like all into loving me and feelings and shit and I just wanted to become famous, rich, and have a sportscar. So I ditched him." Pretty good, huh!

ok. i'll try to send more in the next days...we all send you much gossipy love
marcu

I’m so glad I’m an international black woman with friends on every corner of the earth.

The other day I went down to the Slauson Super Mall in Funkytown to do this style piece for the LA Weekly. I had a great time with my editor Kateri Butler and her rock n roll photog and the photog’s assistant and the assistants assistant. It was a fun day but I forgot just how ghetto the ghetto can be. The security guards weren’t featuring me, and neither were some of the Korean shopkeepers. Koreans are so suspicious sometimes. One lady even said, "Are you coping my designs?" PLEASE. Why would anyone copy a bad knockoff?. I wanted to stay for the entire shoot, but I had an appointment at my studio with an arts bigwig visiting from Europa, who is interested in having me as a guest curator or do some performance/installation event. I’m sure Kateri gave them shiftless Negroes and Korks hell, what they don’t realize is having an article in the Weekly will help their tired businesses, and honey that area needs all the help it can get. Being in funkytown reminded me why I don’t want to live back in the hood. The romanticsm behind it is more interesting then the reality.

My meeting with the arts programmer went well. I was smart to take the bus on Slauson to the Blue line and then the blue line to the red line to my MacArthur Park Studio. I don’t want to talk about the meeting because it might jinx things.

Had dinner with Hector and his lover Erikla at their tiny house in Silverlake on Maltman. Hector cooked a mighty fine meal. I also did my laundry and gave Hector a reading list of classic novels he should pick up. I love how he enjoys improving that Chicano mind of his. I took his copy of Against the Grain (A Rebours) by J. K. Huysmans. He’s not ready for that yet.

Hector and I went to Chico’s in Montebello to see the sexy strip show. My favorite dancer Obregon was up on top of the pool table working it. He has the most wonderful smooth skin, and now that he’s gained some poundage, his booty is even bigger and his whole titty cavity just juts out at you in 3D. Wow. I gave the boy my entire paycheck in tips. He remembered me from Spicy Beef Curtains and was very loving and sweet. There sure were a bunch of amazing papi thugs on the crowded dance floor. Chico’s is my favorite gay bar in all of greater Los Ang.

Worked all morning on my Gay Marriage article for the Weekly. I had to send it off by noon. Luckily it came together nicely. Hope my editor Laurie likes it. Got together with Ron Athey and Crepe Suzette for lunch. We were suppposed to eat at café des artiste, but one of their pipes burst and the place got flooded. I love seeing my favorite Brazilian hostess all frantic. She’s a gem. We wound up eating at Hamburger Hamlet on Hollywood Blvd across the street from the Chinese Theatre. I love the food there, but it sometimes gets a little too touristy, we sat in the bar area and was able to enjoy some privacy, thank god.

Ran into Lawrence Elbert at the tired sauna. Lawrence was my producer/cinematographer and editor for several of my experimental film projects. When I met him he was an eager beaver Cal Arts student and was going out with one of his professors Matias Viegner who had invited me as a visiting artist. Lawrence was a fan of my work and offered his services. Like most students he didn’t have any good ideas, but wanted to get some experience under his belt, and a lot of my projects are very high profile. At the time Lawrence seemed seemed ambitious but not a careerist in that Eve Harrington sortof way that I detest in people. Being I was without resources, the fact that he had at his disposal equipment from Cal Arts made a candy coated light bulb go off in my head. Since he was a conservative looking and somewhat attractive and muscular, I didn’t think that we shared the same aesthetic. His looks were very deceiving. He was a lot cooler and "with it" then I would have imagined. Talk about pre-conceived notions. Most gay boy film students are so clueless. But Lawrence knew his excrement. I saw some of his work which at that time consisted of a few really good documentaries on the rent boy and porn scene and his thesis feature Days of Pentacost which was a remake of Faster Pussycat, Kill, Kill, Kill and starred showboating supremas Alexis Arquette, Marcus Keilland Nazario and the truly talented acting chopsis of Melena de la Moja: aka Mario Gardner. Who is now dead. Lawrence met a lot of performance art people via his internship at LACE gallery.
Days of Pentacost was beautiful to look at, but a remake of Fasterpussycat? You can't improve on that. Tura Satana IS a female drag queen. So although his original ideas weren’t completely my cup of cocoa, I was impressed with his talents as a cinematographer and editor. In these areas he is absolutely brilliant.

I knew that he could give my work a slicker sheen. At the time I was working with Ricky Castro doing the Fertile La Toyah Jackson video magazine. And Ricky’s camera work left a lot to be desired. Ricky is a genius and extremely talented, but his execution was sloppy and ragged and I wanted to progress and keep the good ideas flowing but make things look a little bit more pristine. Well I connected Ricky and Lawrence, and I though the ultimate test would be to see if Lawrence could handle Ricky who is, how shall I put it? A bit abrasive. Yes thats one way to say it. Well they actually got along, and Lawrence wasn’t flakey like most youngish gays. He had a decent work ethic, which was surprising because as its important to point out, he was good looking with a nice body and usually those kind of boys don’t really need to work hard, because there is alway some man there who will support them.

Well Lawrence and I continued to make magic together for several years producing the films "Designy Living, VooDoo Williamson, and cultiminating in our masterpiece "The White To Be Angry" We actually got along quite well, even though I had to fight a bit during the editing with him. His Texas conventionality would sometimes get the better of him, sometimes in an edit I would insist on something be cut a certain way and he would go on about filmmaking rules that of course mean absolutely nothing to me, but usually he would say "oh I can’t believe it actually does work like that" so it was a nice give or take. But of course working with a black drag diva can take its toll on anyone. Me and Ricky eventually parted ways and so it was inevitable that me and Lawrence would as well. I guess certain people are only meant to be in your life for a short period of time, then you move on. I take that certain gene from my mother where keeping our individuality is more paramount then maintaining certain friendships or romantic relationships. When my mother was over someone they ceased to exist, whether it was a relative or close friend. She was the ultimate loner. And i guess in many ways i'm the same way. Of course i'm much more social then my mother was, and much more demanding on friends and acquaintances. When my mother dropped you, there was no anamosity she just wasn't interested in your company any more and that was that. I'm a little bit more grand, but its been so long since i talked with Lawrence that i can't remember why i was upset with him in the first place. I think he felt slighted by me or something like that, and then i must have gotten all haughty and thought, "How Dare he----I am the all powerful Doll" I also ran into one of Kembra Pfhaler's New York friends later in the evening. God it was girlfriend night. Not a good sign.
It was surprising running into Lawrence. We’ve never bumped into each other anyplace in the last 4-5 years or so. He looks good with a little bit of extra weight. I think he was able to hold at bay his white middleclassism in light of his hedonism. I really feel that he has a great movie to make stored deep deep in some dank recesss. I’m sure he won’t be able to figure that out for quite some time though which is sad.

Had breaky with Professor Jennifer Doyle at Madame Matisse in Silverlake. We had a good time. It will be the last time we will get to hang out because she has a conference in Spain where she is making a presentation replacing Emelia Jones, then after that she vacations in the South of France. Her mothers good friend owns a home there. I hope La Doyle gets lots of hot young french penii. She deserves it. We also ran into cute Skot of the band 400 Blows. Now he is a delightful boy who is a true bohemian. Not one of these psuedo boho’s that run rampant in downtown, Silverlakey and Echo Park. This kid is the real deal. When I interviewed his band at my old Koreatown compound for the LA Weekly, I took pics of them butt naked and Skot had no qualms bearing it all. I love it when boys have enough good sense to do what Ms. Davis tells them to.

Bricktops was zany, with an appearance by the unpredictable group He Who Cannot Be Named from Zurich, Switzerland via Luzanne. They had the audience rolling around on the floor with laughter. Of course Mr. Uncertain was his usual frolicsome self, enchanting both the males and females in the house with his precious supply of youthful beauty.
A gaggle of well dressed flappers who work for Women’s Wear Daily were having a grand ole time dancing and whooping it up. I took a lot pictures of these fun loving gals. Party planner to the stars Bryan Rabin stopped by and was looking very sexy and trim. He introduced me and performance artist Ron Athey to Robert DeNiro’s young and extremely handsome mulatto son Raphael DeNiro. Wowza! The boy is a bootypie!
Film costume designer "Crepe" Suzette Mathelson(Blue Crush, Crazy/Beautiful) also dropped in wearing a gorgeous french designed hat and an ultra unique ring by this Israeli jewelry designer. The ring looked like a silver and crystal brass knuckle. She also brought along her cute little doggie "Fendi" Baguette and actor Josh Lucas(Sweet Home Alabama) and his girly friend Thora Birch. I loved Thora in Ghost World.
The next day I went to the IFP Los Angeles Film Festival’s Great Nickelodean Show at the Directors Guild with "Crepe" Suzette. I thought Outfest was an ill festival, well this IFP takes the pie’s cake. LA use to have a brilliant film festival called Film-Ex back in the late 70s and early 80s. Going to IFP really confirmed my hatetred of icky industry types. What is that saying i have: lined pieces of white paper from a three rung notebook. The
Nickelodean Show was incredible, of course it was sparsely attended. No one in LA knows when anything is really good, they are such sheep.
It was an utter delight to see such rare films as Le Scarab d’or(The Golden Beetle) from 1907 and Le Voyage dans la lune from 1905. And get a live vaudeville show thrown into the bargain.
After the movie we went to visit Suzette's production designer friend Franco who she’s known since they were children living in South Afrika. He is Peruvian and Greek, and reminds me of my production designer friend Jose Montana who is mixed with Bolivian and Swedish and designed the rock video for REM’s "Losing My Religion" Jose works more on big budgeted car commercials these days. Suz and I also had din din at that pizza place in Laurel Canyon that use to be Coyote’. The food was delish. We then went by where Lady Bunny was staying at Loretta Hogg’s leased house near Hancock Park. Loretta use to be part of the club kid society of New York in the late 80s and early 90s. The scene that the movie Party Monster regales, now she works for The Courtney as in Courtney Love.
Of course I didn’t check my phone messages and Lady Bun Bun cancelled the desert party, which was fine and dandy as I already had quite a long day of it. Used Suz’s cell phone to call Bun, and she wanted to get together in the morn for breaky, since she is leaving in the afternoon. Something tells me that I won’t be able to wake-up for an early breakfast, but Lady will be back in town for Gay Snide where she is performing at the tired festival in WeHovial, so I’m sure we’ll espy each other.
Spent Sunday being very lazy. Bricktops takes its toll on me, and with all the running around on Saturday with the "Crepe" I really didn’t have much re-cuperation time. Spent early Sunday evening at my sister Teresa Ray’s in Hollywood. My poor crazy hermana is becoming like my mother. She spent so much time as her caretaker in her final years that now that my mother is dead, my sister doesn’t have a purpose in her life, so she’s mirrored my mother and has taken on all her eccentricities. In other familial news: My nephew Mark Taylor got laid off from his job at USC and only his wife is working full time. With all those very young children that he has, I don’t know how they are surviving on just one small salary. Teresa says he has cooked up some zany scheme where he’s going to be selling cheaply made clothes from the orient. Yeah and I’m moving into a beachfront house in St. Petersburg, Russia. My poor niece Terri Lynn and her no account husband are still living with her mother and my other sister in the Park LaBrea Towers. My sisters can barely afford the $1400 a month rent, but with my niece her husband, and all her children also living there, they are
all surely to be kicked out soon, and now is not the climate to be without a place to live. My other nephew Brian Keith is still in the army stationed in South Korea. He tried to get out of the armed forces, but they are not letting him go. He’s been in the army now for 8 unbelievable years. I told him not to sign up, but he couldn’t find any other work and of course he’s sired a million children that he can’t afford to take care of. I’m so glad I’m not a breeder. Having a need to follow societies dictates in marrying and procreating awfull children is so brainless why do so many people fall into the trap?
Overslept so i didn't get an early start on work at my office/studio. I'm way behind on a million deadlines. At my studio today my neighbor, this older black gentleman who is a photographer showed me his loft space which is huge on the west wing of the 8th floor. He has several suites joined together and he lives in the place, and has been living here in this building which was built in 1917 since 1986. His rent most be really really cheap. He’s a really nice man. My LA Weekly colleague Ben Ehrenreich, son of the famous feminist writer Barbara Ehrenreich has an office on the 9th floor. There is also some loud rock n roll band that rehearses on the 9th floor.
On the first five floors are what i call botanica abortion clinics. On the ground floor is a pharmacia where this really cute latin boy with nice skin and dark spiky hair works. This kid is in his early 20s and really beyond gorgeous. Across the hall from me is a girl i hardly see who is some graphic designer and next to her is a clothing design team of mother and gay black son. Next to them is some communista revolutionary Bader/Meinhoff group who may be secret terrorists, or at least thats the feeling i get from them. One of these days I'll come to work and my entire building will be surrounded by police helicopters and yellow tape.
I guess to sum it up my studio/office is in quite the happening building. Of course anywhere Vaginal Davis migrates becomes the new hot place. Remember what happened to Korea town? I turned it out so well, that i got outpriced and vanquished.

When i was in England doing Visions, Bruce LaBruce and i got into the subject of actor Barry Brown. He was a young actor from the early 1970s who appeared in a lot of TV shows of that era like Marcus Welby MD, Rhoda, Gunsmoke and also some movies like Robert Benton's amazing ironic western "Bad Company" that also starred Jeff Bridges and the Peter Bogdanovich bomb of Henry James' "Daisy Miller" starring Cybil Shephard. Of course La Bruce and i both loved Daisy Miller.
But getting back to Barry Brown. I was vaguely connected to him via the punk scene of the late 1970s. He was a friend and sometime fuck buddy of my Brazilian pal Wagner Vieira who is now dead from Mrs. AIDS. I remember in 1978 that Wagner was very distraught when Barry Brown killed himself in the bar/restaurant The Frog Pond on Hyperion in Silverlake. From what i remember he shot himself, but Bruce La Bruce seemed to be under the impression that he hung himself from the rafters, and when his boyfriend the owner opened the place up discovered his gruesome remains. La Bruce says that he killed himself because his homo relationship was souring or some such nonsense. Its been over 20 years, so i can't remember why he took his life. I'm sure Wagner told me, but since i didn't know him that well it didn't resonate. He was very cute though, in that late 70s speed freak sort of way. I didn't see any of his movies until a year or so before he died when they came on late night on TV. That same year my sister Teresa's best friend Luigi died in a tragic accident at the Ambassador Hotel. That place sure is haunted. Poor little Luigi was this shy skinny blonde girl from Manhattan Beach who lived at New Hampshire and Olympic and worked on Wilshire Blvd at Farmers Insurance. In those days Wilshire Blvd was the Insurance Capital of the West. Luigi was only about 25 two years younger then Barry Brown when he killed himself. Every morning before work. Luigi would swim at the giant Olympic sized pool at the Ambassador Hotel Health Club. There were these lights above the pool and i guess one of them fell into the water and electrocuted her. Someone else was in the pool, but on the other end, so they were not affected. I had even applied for a summer job at the Ambassador working for the health club in the Tennis Dept. Luckily i never got a call back.
A few years later in the early 80s the owner of the Melrose Avenue store Fire hung himself in the window. People just thought it was a twisted window display. The store had very new wave clothes and was just a block up from Retail Slut where i worked. It wasn't into late in the afternoon that someone realized it was the actual body of the owner, who ended his life because he found out he had the Mrs. AIDS. Those kinds of suicides were the norm during that period of time.

I had some time to kill and although i was wanting to see another movie, I wound up seeing the Matrix Re-Loaded if that's what its called. These computer generated films look like they are the bad cartoon equivalent to the Roadrunner series. I guess co-director Larry Wachowski is so pussy whipped by Mistress Ilsa Strix that his concentration got blown away or maybe its all the female hormones he's taking. Mistress Ilsa aka: Dizney aka: Karen Winslow is the sexy dom that
I use to work with in her private dungeon in Los Feliz, sandwiched between Lily Tomlin and the Danny DeVito/Rhea Pearlman compounds. I loved working with Mistress Ilsa, she's one sharp tack. A lot of dom's these days seem more like ho's with a whip, but Mistress IL was the real deal and a very credible lady. I remember Ms. Wachowski as a highbrow client, but it would have never dawned on me that their relationship would have progressed into something beyond the professional. Also since Mistress IL was in a committed relationship with her FTM husband Master Jake Miller. Who I've known for umpteenth years, even during the days he was a successful Olympic athlete and model named Laura. Well i guess he decided to sell the story of their breakup to the National Enquirer. I guess I'd be pissed too, if the one i loved left me for a uber wealthy, but kinky film director.

But getting back to reviewing the Matrix film. The only good scene was when Keanu Reeves heart fisted his butch top girlfriend Carrie Moss. And what with poor Lawrence Fishbourne. Besides his
gigantic pores that look like meteor craters on the big ToddAO screen he has 88 chins and a brontosaurus neck. I remember when he use to be doorman of Contemporary Space in Hollywood, Janet Cunningham's after hours art gallery, back in the early 80s.

Took Hector to Big Fat D. . . Mario Lopez' thursday nite party at Fubar. Hector wanted to celebrate closing a big deal with his new company.Honestly i wanted to go to Chico's of Montebello and see the hot latin male strippers, but they don't do their stuff on thursday nights so Fubar became plan 2. BFD has a slightly older crowd then Mario's Saturday party Hot Dog at the Parlour Club. Mario was looking hunky and fit as ever with those amazing gleaming nuclear white teeth of his. The boy is a mega beauty in every sense of the imagination. No wonder Jackie Beat is so enamored of him. I'd give him my last paycheck and go hungry just to be able to stick my nose up his cootchie.

Caught a glimmer of Alexis Arquette. He must be preparing for a new movie role, because he was un-recognizeable as he was fluffing boys for their big plow the melon contest that was taking place later in the evening. We didn't stay for the hijinks that would undoubtedly ensue, even though there were some very handsome men afloat. Hector's white boy meter was on overload. He
could barely contain his busty lusty. Ran into hot couple St'Eve Hall and Glen, Brian Rabin looking very sleek and figure skater trim, sporting a summer blonde doo. Also it was great seeing Richard Velasco, who looks amazing. I've known Ms. Velasco since the late 70s. She use to do the windows at Maxfields and is one hell of a creative lady and LA legendina. I've seen pictures of her in the late 60s and early 70s and she was one of the most amazing beauties that ever existed during her flaming youth.
I don't know why, but we then went to the Wet Undewear Contest at the Gauntlet II. Let me just say that was a big mistake. A somewhat muscular Asian or Latin looking man starting flirting with me, but he was such a mess---either drugs, drinking, low self esteem damage-----or a combination thereof-----that i had to run away from him. Yowza!

Received over 20 emails from fans in Birmingham, England and London thanking me for "Visions of Excess" the endurance performance event I co-curated with Ron Athey for the Fierce Festival. A lot of these people said they cried during Ron’s performance piece "The Solar Anus" Ron was shaking like he was epileptic as he rammed the giant dildos connected to his high heels up his asstrovar. The highly charged music that goes with the piece really illicits a vibro response from an audience. It was the perfect way to end the performance section of the festivities that evening though the party out of bounds portion raged on until the sun shone brightly.

Its now official, Ron and I are being invited back to England to scout locations for a UK Tour. Wow. I’m really excited.

Bricktops Friday was full of surprises. The first came in the form of Pat Loud of the famous Loud family and her husband. For those of you too young to remember. The Loud Family which included gay son Lance, were part of TV history in the early 70s when they were followed by a documentary crew for PBS. The series is the procurser to todays reality TV shows, albeit a much smarter variant. Lance Loud was a a dear friend of mine and died a few years ago. He and his mother would throw some of the most marvelous dinner parties you could imagine at their small house on Fountain Avenue. The attendees were some of the smartest, most creative and enfluential people of all the 14 continents of the southwestern world. Before Lance died he brought his estranged parents back together and it was incredible having them at my soiree. They came to see Kristian Hoffman perform. Kristian and Lance formed the great band The Mumps, which was one of NYC’s first punk bands and one of my all-time favorite bands. Kristian told me that Pat saw the original Bricktop perform in New York right before she died, and Mrs. Loud who was looking quite stunning told me that I remind her of Bricktop, because Bricktop had swollen legs and wore little tiny slippers, and I was wearing little tiny ballet slippers before changing into heels for the show. I even had a swollen knee.
How’s that for a hot tidbit? Kristian put on a dynamic performance as is his usual standard, he is a great showman. It was also fantastic seeing Joe Berardi of the Fibonnaci’s on percussion. The evening began with another surprise, a visit from Tom and Aldo from Budapest, Hungary who played some lovely atmosphere music on guitar and mandolin. Mr. UnCertain was also in top form and I did a 20s version of The Nymphs "Sad and Damned". I’ve always loved that song and was quite close to Inger Lorre during her modeling days when she first formed the band with Bobby Belltower who lived in the famous Karnak Apt building with me back in the 80s----gosh those were fun times. I partied hearty at the Karnak which was built in the 20s by Paramount Pictures to house their young ingenues. Paramount built several Egyptian themed apartments in the area. The Karnak was the best kept and I lived there for 1 year and 9 months along with my Afro Sister,"Pop That Cherry" Jefferson before some carpetbagger bought the building and paid us all to move so he could gentrify it. Don’t let me get started about being gentrified out of a building.
It was also great seeing Bryan Rabin who has become the #1 party planner to the stars and studios, and Richard Velasco wearing quite the dapper outfit. The other celebutantes making the Bricktops scene:
Charlie’s Angels designer Michael Schmidt dressed like a sexy Public Enemy #1, "Jailbait" Velasquez of Cholita fame, the most important woman on the planet Bibbe Hansen with young Chicano hubby and filmmaker Sean Carillo, big fat tittied actress Jennifer Connelly(A Beautiful Mind) who requested a Lilian Roth tune, and that hunky sizzle of an actor Jeremy Sisto who I wouldn’t mind spending a few days scarfing out his ripe bunghole. Oh and the last surprise was seeing my former LA Weekly colleage Ben Adair who is now working for NPR. I adore cute bubble butted Ben and it was nice meeting his girlfriend and their posse. I hope they make Bricktops their regular hang. Oh and don’t let me forget the Zurich, Switzerland brigade of Babs, Cyril, Kara Hunger & Company.

I’ve gotten a lost of requests to see my Bricktops playlist, so here is a partial of that said listina:

"Bilbao" Weba Garretson and the Eastside Sinfionetta
"Avalon" Al Jolsen
"Papa De Da Da" Vernel Bagneres from "One Mo Time"
"Waltz For Stella" The Acres
"Clap Hands Here Comes Charlie" Ben Vereen from "Funny Lady Soundtrack"
"Yonder Over There" Glen Meadmore, from his album "Hot Horny and Born Again"
"Matinee Idol" Rufus Wainwright
"How Far Away Are the Stars?" Victor Banana
"Can’t Help Loving That Man" Helen Morgan original Broadway cast album of "Showboat"
"The Hate Song" Abby Travis
"Single Girl, Married Girl" Pleasure Box from the Carter Family Tribute Album
"Nobody" Bert Williams
"Mountain Greenery" Janet Klein and her Parlour Boys
"Leave it to Jane" Leave It To Jane Soundtrack
"The Laughing Policeman" Charles Penrose with Orchestra From Childrens Songs of the 20s
"I Love Louisa" Fred Astaire
"La Petite Tonkinese" Josephine Baker
"Small Apart" Nora Keyes

i am so absentminded. i forgot to mention that when my plane landed at London's Heathrow Airport it was greeted by a squadron of police. The only explaination the captain gave us was that an incident happened on board.
The other evening i was treated to a superbulous dinner at Capanile on LaBrea Avenue by Dr. Jennifer Doyle of UC Riverside. Dr. Doyle is such a sweet and great lady. I had never dined at the restaurant before and i must say that the service was impeccable. The hostess and waiters doted on us, and we definately did not look as well kept as the other westside diners who are their regular toasted butter. I was surprised that they didn't look down upon us, and later in the evening a few other funky looking people showed up for dinner and were also given good service. I ordered the asparagus soup and the porterhouse steak and we shared the most exquisite bottle of wine, plus a fantagled dessert. Our waiter was a tall square jawed actor type who under normal circumstances would be all squishy and precious, but i couldn't help but like him even though at first i didn't want to. The real beauty of the place was a latin line cook with full suck-u-lent lips that both me and Dr. D. were lusting over. On our way out we even told the nice hostess that he was the beauty prize of the place and needed a spotlight on him.
Today i had lunch with Jose Montana who is a production designer and art director for big budgeted commercials. He rode his bike down from Echo Park and we walked over to 1st and Vigil to eat at Picholine which is one of my favorite places in LA. The cute tall gangly guy was working the counter. It was so marvelous eating there and we even had some chocolate for desert. The desert chef was the most delightful older french man. He was very charming and a bit sexy as well. I gather he is a bit of a dinge queen as he made a point of saying that he loved the "dark" chocolate. I even bought a box of chocolates for Daddy Athey, since he has such the sweet tooth.
It was nice getting together with Jose. I haven't seen him since that time we booth went to 1001 Arabian Nights the hybrid Latin Oddysey, and Gay Middleeastern Nite at Rudolpho's Cantina on Fletcher and Riverside in Silverlake. I dragged lord andrew and Lenny the young elder there last saturday. The Belly dance Review is amazing. But they play too much circuit party music in trying to be something for everyone. Its not someplace i'll go every month since it does cost $15 with a buffet, but every now and then its fun to see a lot of people and be around a scene where i don't know anyone. I fell in love with middleeastern pop music when Marcu and Daniela took me to Salon Oriental in Berlin.

Back from Birmingham. What a success. Our event was denounced by a conservative member of Parliament who said that Ron and I need to seek medical attention for our depravity. You can’t buy that kind of press. We really took Missy mother england by storma. Birmy is an odd little town. I like it better than london, well London is really tired now. Oh did I say that? Yes I’ve officially proclaimed London tired. It was so bizarre to work on Visions of Excess for so long and have it be this idea on paper then have it officially materialize. The best thing was at the technical meeting at the hotel bar when all of the artist converged together. The regular business people and gay pride guests were spooked. It certainly was lovely having Judy Labruce, who premiered a clip from his new movie Rasberry Reich, which is going to put him in line for one day receiving a Mrs. Oscar. Plus one of my best girlfriends in all the world, Glenn Belverio aka Glennda Orgasm who was my celebrity guest DJ,and Kembra from the Voluptuous Horror of Karen Black, who is always pure perfection. And of course they all are giant talents who really made the festivities shine.

Also Slava, the Russian art star and his cute modern dancer Dutch beau Raoul, whose dance company is doing a residency in Cardiff. All the Velvet Hammer Girls: Michelle Hell, Hope and Selene really sparkled!!!!! The Birmy rock crowd were hypnotized by the bewitching sensuality of the Velvets. It seems like England is going through a retro grunge look that isn’t very appealing.
I think the Velvet Hammer girls all had major ms. Gorgeous crushes on sexy Slovenian artist Davide Grassi whose colonoscopy video installation was a huge hit. Marrisa Carnesky did a take on Blue of Noon as a nasty fortune telling tattoed naked lady in a glass cage. I can't wait to see her perform at UCLA's Royce Hall.

Irish lovely Kira O’Reilly did a very intimate one-on-one installation involving a glass of sherry and blood, while her spirited mother Liz warmed everyone’s heart with her showboating. Lee Adams aka: Sexmutant gave it his all as a human vase with a bouquet of flowers stuck up his asstrovar. He even wound up passing out in the name of art. What a fantastic trooper he is!!!!

Udo Kier showed everyone just why he is an international film star and dogma darling with his impersonation of Bataille. Only Udo would want to do an installation based on Bataille’s fued with Jean Paul Sartre and Genet. It was really a coup to have him take part in the event considering he was very busy filming a movie and also making an elegant appearance at the Canne Film Festival with Lars Von Trier and Nicole Kidman.
Everything about Visions was nearly perfect. Such a contrast with working with the tired Outfest film festival. Oh did i call them tired? Aren’t I mean? Lets just put it this way, "Some of us aren’t able"
I was really impressed with the Birmingham Noir kids who did a take on Literature and Evil
and worked diligently as a collective. Ann Marie Pope of Fierce Earth organized them all and thank god for her. No one rocks like Ms. Ann Marie.

Right before the opening of Visions, me and Daddy and Davide and the Velvets went to the Catapult Club at this pub called The Jug of Ale to see one of the cute Birmy Noir boys, Greg
perform with his new band Palomar.He use to have this band called Baxter that was really hot, but they broke up.One of the other Baxter boys, Steve who is also the most adorable sex pud with a fresh face and tight little body was performing with his new combo The Vests. I really enjoyed both bands, and I haven’t liked seeing rock music in a long, long time. The Vests are similar to The Streets who are this critically acclaimed English rap band. Of course the Vests are the real deal, and the lead singer is hysterically funny and they have these two muslim girl go-go dancers wearing school uniforms that makes it even iller. Steve is the drummer and boy can he pound the skins. He is also a little bit of a ginger head and I used him in my Fair to Midland Concubine installation. He was very uninhibited. Shall I say more? No I shant.

We even got some celebrities to attend Visions, namely Ms. Lady Victoria Posh Spice and her handsome cornrow headed hubby David Beckham, who broke his thumb playing
soccer in South Afrika.

Gillian Anderson of X Files fame who was in town for some Zembla magazine launch but got bored of that and decided to check out Visions as well. She got down with Steve, my hornriffic concubine.
I’m just too scared of that Missy Gillian. The girl really knows how to let loose. My co-host Dell, who does this sweet little act called Penii Origami, tied his big Willis in a knot and he and Gill went to town up in Bruce La Bruce’s Trial of Gille de Rais installation.

On Tuesday morning that gemstone, Lady Anna drove me to the Gatwick Aeroport for my long trip back home. Can’t wait till Anna comes visiting LA in July. She is such a fun girl and we instantly became best girlfriends.

Thank god I didn’t have to suffer in a cramped seat next to some crying designer baby on my flight back to Los Ang. I had lots of legg room and plenty of boy eye candy in short shorts to oogle.

Of course there is no rest for the wickedly impaired. I had to get back in the swing of things immediately all jet lag or no jetlag. Rehearsed with Mr. Uncertain for Bricktops and decided to sing a modern Negro Spiritual that I wrote called "Tyrone the Baptiste". Mr. Un was also doing an original song. We work so well together and are always on the same page. Lord Andrew told me that last week while I was away in England that Troy Garity, the sexy actor son of Jane Fonda and Tom Hayden came by and made all the girls swoon. I wish I had a TV so I could see Troy in that cable movie where he plays a soldier who gets killed for having a tranny girlfriend.

Back at Bricktops and it feels good to be home. I really do get an appreciation of Los Ang when I have my gigs elsewhere. It seems like everyone missed and appreciated me. The crowd was loud and boisterous and everyone seemed to be having a good olde fashion time. Some cute young kids came who could really do the fox trot. I loved watching them dance. Mr. Un was in high form. He has really developed into a top rate talent. I wasn’t bad either and I didn’t get too drunk. How's that for professionalism. I even went into a bit of a rap between songs about how that tired casting person for the Will and Grace show wanted me to audition to play the genre stretching part of a sassy black drag queen. I don’t even own a TV so, why would I want to be on some god awful gay situation comedy?

Celebutants this week at Bricktops: Bull dagger pop star Pink, Chris Martin of the band Coldplay with his lady friend, my good girlfriend Gwyneth. Also the surfer/rocker Jack Johnson who is mighty fine and even complimented me on my singing. He said I exude such strength and emotion when I sing. All I could think about was that he was either high or drunk, because I’m not much of a songbird. Hahahahahaha, but I’d sure like to take a swigger on his peterfication.

Sunday Afternoon-I got so many emails from people asking for the text for one of my Bricktop shows that I’ve decided to include it here along with the English translation. Enjoy.

Dios de Gritos

Porque me renuncias
Porque me renuncias
Pinche Mayate feya desgraciada!
Eres una qualqiera, un pedaso de excremente.
Como te atravese cojer a otros dioses en me precencia
Veras mi poder y te are un grano de sal
Y tu nieto el mister quien sabe que! El maricon de los maricones!
Que busqa su mochila de vergas.
Pero por que me molesto con una puta, una puta estupida
Con su apeste tan fatale que me llegar asta el cielo.

Why have you forsaken me?
Why have you forsaken me?
you tired ugly black thing
you whore
what a filthy putrid piece of excrement you are
how dare you lie down with other gods and worship them before me
I should strike you down and turn you into a pillar of salt
you and that little faggot grandson of yours whatever his name is,
he is a faggots faggot and needs a new bag of dicks

why do I even bother with you
whore, whore
stupid fucking idiotic whore
you smell so bad that the stench
reaches me all the way up here in the heavens

here in birmingham england. Yazoo!!! the fierce festival has put me and daddy at the holiday inn in the city ctr. My flight was wonderful. plenty of legg room on the plane and lovely juicy young beautiful boys to troll. Went disco dollying on my first night and picked up a hot blonde twink with a bubble butt and bigg titties. pretty nelly but very sexy in that english walk of several flights of stairs to get to flat way. I plowed the living daylights out of him all night long. In the morning i gave him an extra plow just because i was feeling so mack mama. now he is my new young husband. In the morning my young boy had to go to his designer for his gay pride out fit. that was a bit tired, but alas he's only 19 years old so what can i expect.
oh i fogot to mention that Skot Armstrong had told me about a movie called Jesus Christ Vampyre Hunter, filmed entirely on location in Ottawa or Ottywood as its called by those in the know. I got to see this film also flick called The Happiness of Kata Kuris which is a japanese horror musical directed by Tahishi Miike who directed a film that is very well known called Audition.
Glenn Belverio aka: Glennda Orgasm arrived yesterday and we're having a hoot of a time. The rest of the Visions artists get here today. Its going to be wonderous. Oh and i ran into this 16 year old tennis star from spain named Rafael Nadal who is a fan of mine. Boy is this kid a beaut. Wait till he grows up, he will be breaking a lot of young ladies hearts.