WIN &
IMPRESSUM
Did I forget to tell you that
I saw a screening of the Jon M. Cho film Crazy Hung Asians that stars
rapper/comic Awkwafina, the heiress apparent to Margaret Cho?
The film would have been more
interesting if the sexy male actors were shown dry humping and doing the puppy
chow on each other. There is certainly a
need for all-Asian starring Hollywood films.
While this programmer was colourful and fast paced, it was also a bit
twee. Hearing Grace Chang on the soundtrack
was certainly a high point along with a very attractive cast.
*
A little excerpt from Mary
Magdelene a novel by Vaginal Davis:
Nellent Forbrush, “Nelly” for
short was all up in Dinah Shore arms about the French Lieutenant’s wo-Man
chomping on her bit n apple. He was 34
years old and very tall breathing life back into her with his CPR style suck phace. The only thing she didn’t like about him was
that he vaped. She wanted to taste the
natural Frenchy flavours and Gallic odours and not his nicotine confectory.
Nelly also happened upon a giant
North Eastern Italiano. A competitive
swimmer with a perfect streamlined moderne body beautiful and peterfication
like a filled Cream soda bottle. He was
all mushroom headed wonder with massive gonads floating to the surface Run
Silent, Run Deep freaky styly. Nelly won
him over with her detached throat nodgules, that were bringing him to the point
of whoregasm before she decreased pressure and deflated him with one soulful
slurry. Miss Nelly wasn’t fully aware of
her hidden talents or skillz. All her life
she took scant notice of hearthy charms and wool worth on the open
marketa.
The Italian hare could have
easily impregnated any other girl, but fortunately for our heroine nothing
could ever be planted in her barren womba.
The next day Ms. Forbrush
traipsed in passions plurry with a thyroid eyed Ugandan hunchback with Plessy
vs Ferguson liver lips. He was passing
through Prussia on his way to a wedding in Brussels Belgium. He was fun and fancy free making her feel
desired, but it was a pillowlipped
Columbian Cartel solicitor with a receding hairline who really gave her the
girlish gnut she was craving. He dragged
her around the bedroom lifting her up high in the air and thumping her hard onto
the floor.
His crotch was in her face,
his feet were stomping on her. She was
wrapped around his torso, he was strumming her with Eddie Van Halen licks. One of her legs he put over the dresser and
the other down by the kitchen sink. His
kisses were carnivorous chomps drawing blood.
He looked so harmless. She
didn’t expect a man of his dimunitive stature to be so strong and tank like.
Between the biceps on his
toes, and the rest of his ironclad musculature she fared pretty much like an
Ostrich feather lost in his Mighty Joe Young arms.
*
Contemporary Vinegar
Syndrome’s Borscht Belt Modalities evening at the Prinzessinnengarten am
Moritzplatz was a sterling success. The
screening of Jumping Nite at the Garden of Eden by Michal Goldman 1988 and
Granpa Sam 2001 left the publicum in a joyous summer nite mood.
Jewish Muzlim Daniel Hendrickson
was the overseer of our Nebesh Off, and made the delish pickles that everyone
was munching on. In the audience were
some very beautiful Nebeshy boys which bolstered our musical soundtrack
provided by The Glorious Barry Sisters.
Arsenal Empress Stefanie
Schulte Strathaus welcomed everyone with open arms, and the Arsenal membership
drive was certainly increased a thousand fold.
Our guardian at the gate the
lovely Salome Gersch was the perfect first person that everyone sees at the
kasse. Salome will be leaving Arsenal at
the end of the month to continue her studies in France and write her Masters
thesis.
So happy we have the Red
Baron Gerrit Woltemath Gottfried von Cramm as our sexy patrician Production
Coordinator. Gerrit takes care of every
little thing for us brilliantly with his wonderful attention to detail.
The Prinzessinen Garten staff
of Werner & Dennis, Mixologists Vivi & Ine at the bar also contributed
greatly to the standout evening. Arsenal’s senior projectionist Bodo Pagels did
a marvelous job with the 16mm projecting of Jumpin’ Night, a print that hasn´t
been screened in over 26 years.
The celebutants in
attendance:
teen star Aaron Hilmer (Das
schönste Mädchen der Welt), Michaela (Ela) Wünsch of BBooks Kollektiv, Markus
Ruff of Arsenal Leiter Archive außer sich, Uli Ziemons of Forum Expanded,
Mariam Frick of Panorama Section of the Berlinale, Anke Hahn of Deutche
Kinemathek, Natalie Knoll of Berlinale Forum, Popo Fan the juicy and stylish Chinese
filmmaker, activist and critic with DJane Bianca Kruk and sound designer Manuela Schinina, tall, hunky Luca Jacob Borkowsky head of Piranha
Film/Womex Films, Monilola Ilupeju the beautiful Nigerian recent NYU grad who
was the top student of my ex student artist Jonathan Berger, Kreuzberg local
Senol Senturk, makeup and hair god Christian Fritzenwanker, Katharina Bischoff
the Original Sin Production Coordinator, Discoteca Flaming Star’s Cristina
& Wolfgang with their hot Madrid posse including Cristina’s radiant Biology
professor best friend, hot young queer student Charlotte Peters of FU, Piero
Bellomo, Claire Molloy Assistant Curator at Martin Gropius Bau, and former
Goethe Universitaet curatorial studies student, sweet Verena Kittel of Liste
Art Fair Basel, art schtars Wu Tsang & Boychild, installation artist Raphaela Vogel,
Deutsche Welle and Bloomberg News
journalista Michael Scaturro, Joel Gibb the baby diaper of Canada’s Hidden
Cameras, Fearless Leader of CHEAP
Susanne Sachsse with film historian Marc Siegel aka: Marcuse
Siegelstein, who is also in the film Granpa Sam which is a loving tribute to
his famed photographer grandfather Sam Siegel, Linda Winkler of silent green,
artists Clarissa Thieme and Nicolas Pittarides visiting from London, Magda
Magdy, Stephan Ahrens of Zeughauskino, Michelle Ty and Johanna Rothe, Clarisse
Mehring, David Schöler and actress Diane Kruger.
The Day before I was the
DJane for the Christeene Concert at Berghain.
Christeene has become a huge superschtar in a very short time. Her Cajun party rap mix performance style blends
nicely with moments of timely introspection.
My mothers family are from Louisiana so I am quite familiar with the
nuance of the Christeene persona, and its brilliantine! She is both slick and polished, and not slick
or polished, and that’s what makes things flow so effortlessly on stage. Christeene is a post modern teene idol and
has been collaborating with photographer and video artist Matt Lambert and the
very cute Simon Kaiser.
I also adore her Bob
Fosse/Twyla Tharp back up dancers who are extroidinarily sexxxxy with boundless
psychic TV energy.
Opening up for Christeene was
the divine Michele Lamy the muse and lifepartner of designer Rick Owens. Michele has been making new music with her
daughter Scarlette Rouge and will be performing at the next Frieze Art Fair in
London. Michele’s performance at
Berghain was spellbinding. Joining her
on stage was Boychild and the two played off of each other to perfection. Michele is in her 70s but is so youthful, so
vibrant that she is the epitome of the ageless wonder. Michele reminded me that I’ve known her since
1979 when she had the West Hollywood store Too Soon To Know on Santa Monica
Blvd.
Wasn’t expecting to see Rick Owens at Berghain, but he came from Paris and
it was quite joyous to reunite with him and the high fashion comrades he
brought with him. I haven’t seen Rick since
last year in Paris when I modeled for his new collection, the photos of which
became part of his big retrospective Subhuman Inhuman Superhuman at the
Triennale di Milano.
In the audience at Berghain
was actor Neil Patrick Harris dancing wildly, Shaggy haired artist Jonathan
Meese, International DJane Honey Dijon, Richard Gabriel and girlfriend Lillian,
with muscular medical student roommate Hermann, Daniel Hendrickson & Piero
Bellomo, makeup artiste Akira Knightly with French fashion pals, and super
model Max, scholar Marcuse Siegelstein with gorgeous diva Susanne Sachsse of
CHEAP, Zeitkratzer percussionist Maurice De Martin, artist Tanja Schwarz,
Wolfgang from Discoteca Flaming Star and sizzling Madrid gang of 4our, Felix
Knoke of Der Spiegel, Liz Rosenfeld & Sam Icklow, beauty artists Wu Tsang and Elly Clarke, and sexy
young Frankfurt curator Jose’ Segebre.
Special thanks to Berghains
amazing chef who created the most scrumptious dinner for us and Krischan
Makswitat & Grinni Stangner who were so lovely in accommodating the
Vagimule doll.
Literary Figurine: To whoever is out there in the world wide web
firmament. Ms. Davis would love to get
her hands on a copy of the book One Drop:
A True Story of Family, Race, and Secrets by Bliss Broyard.