Friday, March 08, 2013

LOVING GERALD BUTLER’S TESTICLES

The old Vagimule doll is in a New York group show at Allegra La Viola Gallery curated by Risa and Benjamin the cute kids from Invisible Exports Gallery.  The show just got reviewed in The New York Times.  See below:
I am delighted to let you know that Holland Cotter gave a lovely review to Risa and Benjamin's fantastic show. This is the link: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/08/arts/design/i-killed-my-father-i-ate-human-flesh-i-quiver-with-joy-an-obsession-with-pier-paolo-pasolini.html?_r=0 It will be in today's paper. Thank you all for participating, it has been a pleasure and I look forward to the next weeks of the show!
Best,

Allegra

Allegra LaViola Gallery
179 East Broadway
New York, NY 10002
T: 917.463.3901
www.allegralaviola.com
http://twitter.com/AllegraLaViola
www.notaboutart.com

ON VIEW:
I Killed My Father, I Ate Human Flesh, I Quiver With Joy: An Obsession With Pier Paolo Pasolini.
Curated by INVISIBLE-EXPORTS
Opening Friday, February 22: 6-8PM

February 22 - March 23, 2013

GALLERY HOURS:
Weds-Sat 12-6
Sun 1-6
and by appointment

I will also be in a show in Portland Oregon of all places home of the famous Blue Bros: Tim & kJohnny and Gus Van Sant.

VAGINAL DAVIS AND PHILADELPHIA WIREMAN
May 3 - June 1, 2013
Adams and Ollman
811 East Burnside #213
Portland, Oregon 97214
www.adamsandollman.com

My ex student Marc Arthur has a fab new production that is opening next month in New York.  He needs help with production costs so please donate to his Kickstarted campaign.
After a year of planning and development, I’m thrilled to announce that Mascot will be presented this April at the Martha Graham Dance School in the West Village. This grand ballroom space, which is the former home of Merce Cunningham’s dance studio, matches our goals for the piece perfectly. Rehearsals there (see picture below) have been amazing and there is no doubt that working in the footsteps of such a rich lineage of experimentation has influenced Mascot in exciting ways. Tickets will go on sale in a few weeks.

Save the dates:
Friday April 12th, 8:30pm
Saturday April 13th, 8pm
Sunday April 14th, 8pm

As the project takes shape, we need your help now more than ever. The benefit auction in November at Patrick McMullen’s photo studio has been a huge help but does not cover all of our expenses and production costs. Professor Pickles will tell you more on our kickstarter page that we just launched today!

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/mascot/mascot

Thursday, March 07, 2013

KOENNEN, WAS KEINER KANN

Sad to hear that Valerie Harper of Rhoda and Mary Tyler Moore fame has three months left to live as she is dying of some form of brain cancer.  As a child in the 1970s I adored Ms. Harper as the urban Jewish character Rhoda Morgenstern along with Julie Kavner who played her sister Nancy Walker as her mother and Lorenzo Music as Carleton the Doorman.  Lorenzo Music's daughter Roz Music is an old pal of mine from the LA underground scene working as a make-up and hair stylist.
  

Being a havanagila queen I had a huge crush on David Groh who played Rhoda’s boyfriend Joe on the series that ran on CBS from 1974-1978.  My 19 year old geometry tutor from UCLA looked like a young version of Mr. Groh with his broad shoulders,hairy chest and even hair on his sexy big manly feet.  This hot Jewish nerdy tutor of mine encouraged me to apply  to a program where inner city youth work on a Kibbutz in Israel for a school year.  I won a spot, but my mother prevented me from making the trip as she thought it was too dangerous to be in Israel for nine months.  Of course my main reason for wanting to go was to be with my sexy tutor, meet other Jewish nebishy hunks and spicy Israeli soldiers.  Obviously I have been deluded from an early age.

My father is a German/Mexican Jew as his father and uncle were German Protestants who married beautiful German Jewesses from intellectual/art families and escaped Germany around the time the Nazi’s came to power.  By marrying Jewish women they became estranged with their wealthy industrialist  family.  My grandfather and his brother first moved to Argentina in the 1930s then settled in Mexico City where my father was born and was part of the large Jewish community there.  My father’s German relatives after World War II fled to South America and Mexico to escape punishment for war crimes.  My grandfather actually reported some of his own relatives to the tribunal.  My father met my mother who was working as a domestic for his wealthy Jewish  relatives.  My father was 20 and my mother was 46 when they met.  Nine months later i was the rip heard round the world.  My parents were never married so yes i am what is known as a bastard or love child.  More like sex child as my mother wasn't interested in a relationship with a man after having been married for over 20 years to my sisters father.

When I moved to Berlin in 2006 some of my German relatives contacted me after reading about me in the German press during the Berlinale. These distant Prussian relatives had known about me for some time and live in a Wannsee villa and also have a residence in Dahlem.  I met with them once when i first moved here.  They are nice, but dull as toast. Its odd having people related to me by blood who look very similar but are of a different race.
The Love Camel aka: Andrea Novarin gave me a bunch of wonderful films for Christmas.  Love Camel is quite the cine chick felille.  Here is just a partial list of the movies he gifted:  Paul Bartel’s Secret Cinema, Naughty Nurse, Eating Raoul, Russ Meyer’s Up, Black Snake, Supervixens, Beneath the Valley of the Supervixens, A Star is Born  1937 with Janet Gaynor and Fredric March, Harold and Maude, Black Moon with JoeDellesandro, How to Stuff a Wilde Bikini with Annette, Frankie Avalon and Dwayne Hickman, Jimmy Stewart in Harvey, Our Man Flint, Shock Treatment with Alain Delon and Annie Giradot, The Big Heat with Gloria Graham, The Choirboys with Perry King, the wonderful Japanese films The Flesh is Hot (Pigs & Battleships/Buta to Gunkan) and The Yellow Hankerchief, Tiger Bay with Anna May Wong and the punk documentaries X-The Unheard Music, American Hardcore and Z-Channel about the progressive cable channel executive who I knew from UCLA who killed his wife and himself.
Several years ago their was a rumour floating about that I was having an affair with the President of Venezuela Hugo Chavez.  The gossip began because he was a fan of my work which was introduced to him by filmmakers Oliver Stone and actor Sean Penn.  Of course I never met the man, but it still sadnened me that he died of cancer the other day.  My mother Mary Magdelene Duplantier died of cancer in 2000, my sister Gloria Jean in 2006 and my oldest sister Gracie Lee in 2011.

Wednesday, March 06, 2013

UNREGELMAESSIGE STREIFEN SOLLEN DAS DIGITALE ZEITALTER SYMBOLISIEREN

Talk about wackyness. Google offered me a full-time job of director of their Phrasiology Dept. Have you ever heard of anything so insane? Like I would want to work for a giant corporate institution. Can we say yuk yuk? How did they even get my name and contact information? I swear the lamestream is trying to co-opt at every turn. Google must be really desperate if they want to employ a black woman like me. The last time I was in the running for a corporate job was in the early 2000s from the Ford Foundation, and before that I was recommended by Nancy Barton who now works for NYU and I actually went on an interview in 1994 for the archival department at Paramount Pictures.

Paramount was impressed that I could identify unknown stars under contract to them from the 1920s. I felt like they were going to offer me the position, but when I met the big, big boss at a second interview, he was a twee queen I could tell wasn’t exactly featuring my negroid free spiritedness. The sweet girl who I did the first interview with even called to apologize for her boss being such a prickly pill. It was all just as well as not getting that job led to my doing Club Sucker for five years every Sunday in Silverlake at The Garage. So when one door slams shut another one opens. Would I have really wanted to be a wage slave at Paramount?

Tuesday, March 05, 2013

ICH TIER DU MENSCH


Had a wonderful late supper at Pho Viet on Akasien Strasse with that hunky intellectual love god Christian Weber and his sweet friend Jan who just moved into the Insel as in Rote. Juicy Christian gave his Vagimule doll belated birthday presents that included some homecooked Swabian cookies from his mother and a copy of the Woody Harrelson starrer The Walker directed by Paul Schrader featuring German star Moritz Bleibtreu, Lauren Bacall, Lilly Tomlin, Ned Beatty and Kirsten Scott Thomas. I had always wanted to see this film, so leave it to Christian to rember that fact and deliver me a copy. Harrelson plays a gay confidant to the powerful women of Washington DC and his performance is so lowkey that’s its almost non existent. The best part of the movie is Ms Bacall. Golden era Hollywood stars really know how to milk the screen tit.

My Skandanavian Muslim convert Daniel Hendrickson is back in Berlin from his holiday in Miami and Key West with his parents, older brother and sister in law. He was happy to escape the dreary dank Berlin winter for the warmth and sun of dull Florida. Daniel and his hot boyfriend Piero Bellomo took me to a post birthday breakfast at my new favourite haunt Mokalola on Lebener Strasse. Mokalola is taking the place of East London-God Save Brit Food in my heart. I’ve also introduced the place to Manuel Schubert of Filmhighlights Magazine. Daniel and Piero brought me some lovely birthday presents. They are so thoughtful when it comes to their ancient V-mule.

For those of you who are fans of Aztec Warrior my LA pal with the active imagination that sends me semi regular dispatches or emug postcards from the dredge. Below is his latest:


Sweet Negra,

It's late in my neck of the woods, I'm watching Aljezeera and having a Scotch on the Rocks.
I had a very good day today.  It was productive.
I also had a surprise visit today from a young man I met while out and about on the Playa at Burning Man last year.  I was on my bike with my camera alone, doing my thing.  I pulled over for a draft beer at some camp.  Sitting there having a beer was this young man named Carlos.  You know I'm a Snow Queen, but this little Messican hottie caught my attention.  He immediately started chatting me up about my Tattoos.  I told him, his Tattoo needed to be covered, it was FRESH and Red.  He said, u think so, I said, yes, isn't it burning you.  He said, yes, I said, put a t-shirt on.  U can fuck up your work, it was across his chest.  The guy serving beer chimed in and said, I was gonna say the same thing, but I don't have any tatts, so I just kept my mouth quiet.  We drank our beers, and had a second beer.  He was from Sacramento.  I then see someone I want to photograph and I make my exit.  He follows and joins me on my quest for a photo.  I took the picture, which came out terrible, but he came along wearing a t-shirt and looking like a dork in a sarong.
 
We rode our bikes for a bit, and stopped at a sculpture, he had pot, he smoked, I ate Jelly Bellys.  He joined me with my candy.  We were alone in the art structure and in the shade.  He was chatting 100 miles an hour.  His sarong was all over the place. I saw that he had a boner, we both saw it, he laughed and said, I was thinking of my GF.  I then laugh, and now we both are cracking up because he's stoned and boned up.  I paid no mind to the GF statement.  He covered his dick but he was seeping through the thin fabric.  I put my hand on his dick and he shot a big load and then freaked out about the cum on his sarong.  I stood up, took my underwear off, and wiped his crotch and leg.  He just stood there.  I grabbed his dick and pulled on his balls.  He was frozen and still very hard.

I put my chonies back  on and grabbed my camera and said, how about some pics.  He said No.  He did not like being photographed. We looked at some of the pics I had already taken, but he still said No about getting his pic.  So, I said, I need to head back to camp, I didn't want to miss my meal.  He said, cool, blah blah blah.  He then said, where in L.A. do you live.  When he heard Silverlake, he went on and on about trying to make his way to L.A. and to live in Silverlake.  I gave him one of my stickers with my email and name.
 
Well, he tells me that he kept my sticker. He  Had a great First Burning  Man, went back home and broke up with his GF.  He then talked to his best friend about having Gay tendencies.  His Best friend then gossips the news to Carlos's brother, that lead to his parents finding out and he was kicked out the house.  He is 24 and just finished his degree.  He got into a physical fight with his best friend, his brother also got physical with him for being a fag, and his Mom had to support his dad, and was deeply upset. 
So the kid, packs his shit and comes to L.A.  He lived with a friends cousin in the Valley.  He landed a job as a Personal Assistant to a Rich Black lady and now lives in Silverlake in a converted garage with a dog.  He is a really cute young man with a Delicious ASS!
 
So, he had my sticker and did not want to send me an email until he was settled.  The email came in today.  He reminded me about the beer and afternoon.  He said, I am done for the day, can I stop by ur place.  I said, yes. 15 min later he was at my door.  He had regular black hair in a cool 40's style flip haircut.  At BM, his hair was green.  He walked in and was crazy over my BM photography on the walls.  He hugged me and then said, let's finish what we started.  I didn't know we had started anything.  It was just a short connection, I did not share the connection with anybody once I was back at camp. In seconds he was naked, on his knees sucking me.  I was hard very quickly and then the boy was all crazy, I wanted to get fucked.  So I fucked him.  I popped his cherry.  We had the uncomfortable Ass Hole Opening process.  Once it was good to go, it took him a while, we had a good sweaty time.  There is nothing like a 24 yr old almost hairless Boy AssHole.  Fuck!  It wasn't an aggressive fuck as he was figuring things out.  I let him do what he thought he should be doing.  After a while, I told him, Alright, I'm taking over.  He said, what do i do, I said nothing, just be Quiet. I don't like hearing, Oh, fuck Me,Oh it feels.... That doesn't work for me.  Fucking is Animalistic.  Animals don't talk, they grunt.  He says, ok, and is quiet and grunting/moaning, it was funny,  I pinned him down,  I moved his hands away from his dick and I did what I needed to do. He came, I jacked off and unloaded on his hole.
 
The whole thing was very hot.  He is a pretty Latin boy.  He has a smoking Ass.  He did not ask a single question about my household, or any of the pics around the house, Nothing.  He said, I remember u told me that the most bothersome thing about L.A. is everyone having to know how you know this person, or how this set up works.  He says, I am understanding that, now that I'm in L.A.
He dressed up and he shared with me the above drama after BM.  He saw that I still had a hard on, he said, Do you want to fuck me again, I said, yes, I want your ass sideways on the bed.  He jumped back on the bed, and I fucked him again.  He came first again. 
The party ended when his phone started ringing and it was the  Black woman who needed him to handle something ASAP.  This woman apparently runs around with Oprah, and some other big shot Black ladies.
 
Tonight I have an email from him, asking if he can stop by in the morning.  I said, Yes.
So there you have it.
 
WARRIOR