Monday, September 26, 2011

ICH BIN PULVEREIT
The local Berlin elections ended recently-and the gay burgermeister Klaus Wolvereit has been reelected to another term as mayor. Herr Wolvereit reminds me of Mayor Ed Koch of New York City. Both are big fagulas who love to self promote. One of the oddest coalitions in Germany is the prankster Piraten Party. They are similar to the Cacophony Society in the states except that they actually have a voice in the political forum thanks to the good old grumpy teutonic spirit. Here in Germany it can sometimes pay to be a malcontent. The squeaky wheel will get that oil rag stuffed down its throat if you are loud and persistent enough.
LA based Washington DC born artist Lily Simonsen came by the Cheese Endique Trifecta to visit the Vagimule doll. I first met pretty Miss Lilly when she was just 16 and a huge Beck fan. This was back in the late 90s when I performed as part of the Al &Beck Hansen Playing With Matches exhibition in New York. Now at age 30 Ms. Simonsen is an internationally recognized painter who depicts the creatures who reside in the murky depths of oceanic nature. We had a nice girlish time together drinking white wine spritzers and nibbling on nosh. She told me all about her working for Burning Man this year. My friend Hector Martinez is another person I know who makes the pilgrimage to the Nevada desert hippy dippy playa every year.
Isn´t Rev Al Ridenauer who is married to comedienne Margaret Cho one of the founders of Burning Man? If I want to burn something in effigy I will screen the 1970s cult classic Wicker Man dressed in my best Britt Eckland drag.
Last week I was surprised by Jeffreyland Hilbert who used his GPS navigation application on his smart phone to find my Cheese Endique Trifecta studio. Jeffrey is one of the most generous people I know and treated his Vagimule doll to lunch at the Indian restaurant Moghul on Akazienm Strassse. Jeffrey´s younger brother Kurt was hanging out with his hot young Italian trick. Jeffrey caught a summer cold and decided to take it easy for one night while vacationing in Berlin. He knew he would be partying up a storm in Munich for Octoberfest. Sunday I had a meeting with Daniel Hendrickson and Marc Siegel and then we went to eat at Moghul and were served by the unhappiest waiter in all of Berlin, a tiny little pud of guy with a bubble butt and a dark cloud of a personality.
Wednesday Jeffrey returned to Berlin from Munich and we met at the Holocaust Memorial. We also checked out the Paragraph 175 installation box in the Tiergarten, then Jeffrey took me to luncheon at this high tech boite on Unter des Linden called Holyfields where I ordered the healthy version of fish&chips while Jeff munched on the Eternal Spring tagliatelle. Holyfields accepts credit cards just a little FYI to all you Berlin visitors stymied to find someplace that takes the plastic. Then we walked the miracle mile to the Sieggesaule and got all touristy climbing the top of the golden lady of the panoramic views. On the observation deck Jeff told me something a bit disturbing----namely that Matt Gracie was dead having committed suicide several years ago. Matt Gracie was a dapper bon vivant, and a true sweetheart that was part of the heritage scene of vintage clothing and furniture habitués of LA. He came to Los Angeles many moons ago from Ohio and was close girlfriends with Laurie Pike, my old editor from Glue Magazine. Matt had been lovers with Arnold McCollough the successful session and back up singer to James Taylor and Phil Collins. At one point they had a beautiful house on Mulholland Drive that Matt had meticulously art directed.
Received an unexpected email from “Shooter” my nickname for actor Brad Pitt. Even his wife Angelina Jolie has started calling him by this moniker. It stems from the time he was a high price call boy working the Hollywood circuit and got a reputation for shooting volumeous amounts of semen-sometimes spurting all the way up to the ceiling.
Well get this: Mr. Pitt has optioned the rights to a newly discovered lost book by noir writer James M. Cain author of Mildred Pierce, Double Indemnity and The Postman Always Rings Twice. The original manuscript for this book called The Cocktail Waitress had been missing since Cain´s death in 1979, so now Pitts production company wants to make a movie of it and for some strange reason he thinks I should play the lead role. I told him it was a very bad idea, and that the perfect person to play the part was Jennifer Aniston. So I doubt If I will be hearing again from him any time soon. Well at least not until he & Angie need a über reality check from being outofit movie shtars.
On Jeffrey Hilbert´s last evening in Berlin he invited me over to his hotel room for room service. We had a grand time pigging out and watching mindless cable TV. The BBC had a fascinating interview with British director Ken Loach who really gave it to the silly twee TV presenter. Right on Mr. Loach!
Jeffrey was staying at the Marriott Potsdamer Platz which is hidden behind the Ritz Carleton. Its such a cute hotel and the room was downright lovely with a California King sized bed which brought to mind memories of blue movie great Mike Branson. When I was leaving Jeffrey´s hotel I witnessed a strange occurance outside the Ritz Carleton, a car pulls up with several fugly looking pasty faced men escorting several beautiful scared looking tween age blondine boys. This was a little after midnight. Were these men procurers for his holiness the Pope-Pabst Benedict, bringing him fresh sweet meats to devour or take back with him to his lockdown in the Vatican? Creepy.
I missed the press screening at the Delphi of Almodovar´s new film La Piel Que Habito in German Die Haut in der ich Wohne and in English The Skin I Live In. This film marks the return of Antonio Banderas to the Almodovar knitting factory. I´m sure Antonio is glad to be away from Melanie Griffith. Also in the film is Marisa Paredes and Elena Anaya.
I don´t feel so bad that I missed seeing the latest Almodovar film because at Rising Stars Falling Stars screening Saturday of the Swedish film The Norrtull Girl Gang 1923 directed by Per Lindberg one of the other stars of The Skin I Live In--- Jan Cornet with galpal paid a visit to Arsenal Inst für film und video kunst. Hunky Mr. Cornet who plays the second skin sex change victim in the film is a huge fan of the Blue Bros Tim & John(kJohnny) having just seen the duo perform in Scandinavia so he was happy to get the chance to see them accompanying this beautiful film. With the street closures because of the marathon and the tyro artist showcase at HAU (I recommended half of the young artists on the bill) the Rising Stars screening was very very intimate. Sharing a giggle at the after screening reception in the Rote Foyer: Daryl Els the vivacious young South African guest film programmer, Daniel Hendrickson the Jewish Muslim, Manuel Schubert of FilmHighlights Radio Magazine, prima ballerina Trixie Cordua, Ulrich Ziemons, the handsomest man in all Europe filling in for Arsenal Empress Stefanie Schulte Strathaus who is in New York, and Nadja Talmi of Haus of World Cultures.
O if you´re at the news stand pick up a copy of the German fashion, art & culture magazine Sleek. There is an interview with the Vagimule Doll with two flattering pics. It’s the gender issue and it also features a glossy fashion spread with Singapore artist Ming Wong and an indepth interview with Genesis Breyer P-Orridge and Glenn O´Brian of Interview Magazine fame.