Wednesday, July 23, 2008

THE FIRMAMENTS LOSS
Sad news to report in the passing of Berlin based internationally adored star Gunther Trube, a giant in the deaf activist community, and drag poet muse to Karl Lagerfeld. This legend will be greatly missed. I only met her a few times but she certainly stood out with her warmth, grace and open spirit.

Monday, July 21, 2008

ICH HASSE MODE
Went to UDK graduate presentations, the art school that my NYU intern Marc Arthur has been attending as an exchange student. What an event with lots of activity buzzing the Kleistpark satellite campus. Wasnt able to find where Marc´s performance and film was going to be shown at first, and accidentally discovered Guillame´s lovely film in a basement alcove. Guillame is the cute french projectionist who works at the Arsenal´s Kino 2, and has been a big part of Rising Stars, Falling Stars lately. He goes to the school and is a scruffy Gallic charmer. Also was surprised to see Uli of Forum Expanded. Uli is the ultimate piece of eye candy and is one of my favorite people in Berlin. Wasnt surprised to see Isabel Spengler, as she teaches at UDK. Marc´s presentation featured a Lisa Suckdog look-a-like doing a combative performance that seemed pure Lisa in her early 90s heyday. It was wonderful also to see Marc´s completed film “Letters From a Ruined Dream” where i play a cameo as Morpheus in Ovid´s Metamorphosis, opposite the new art wunderkind DeRohan Chabot who is dreamy in the piece. The boy cant be photographed badly, he looks simply ravishing from any angle. Also chit chatted with Marc´s pretty cinematographer Kim. Had to leave the opening, which was getting quite packed to meet with Travis Jeppeson and Mario at the club Search & Destroy. They had a new toy, i mean friend with them, that they met in Roma named Boris, and i also got to meet Mario´s 15 year old lover from Spain Octavio. Mario had popped the poor kids cherry a few weeks back, at some club, and now that the boy doesnt have a hymen anymore he is ripe and ready to travel that road of Berlin´s newest passed- around-Patty. I have been to Search & Destroy once before or maybe i was at London Calling--- oh it doesnt matter none of these clubs are that interesting, just filled with a bunch of weenagers happy to be anywhere, but there were lots of tourists from all over the world, so it was a little more lively then usual, and i wound up getting into a million conversations. One beautiful humpy dork of a Bavarian boy, who is an aspiring comic named Florian Spieler really caught my eye. He´s a bit on the short side, but has an outgoing personality, and winning smile that held my attention in a big fat tittied way. He has already done the comedy circuit in the states from Hollywood to Colorado, and i could see him really going places. One of his jokes went something like this: i knew Barack Obama when he was still called Cassius Clay. Speaking of Mr. Obama he will be in Berlin this coming week on his way back from the middle east. I wonder if he will sing some of his greatest hits from the early and mid 90s.
Also at the club was Baby Brian, the former concubine of directors Bryan Singer and Gus Van Sant. He was being his regular disorderly self, and had me laughing out loud telling me of his sexual exploits as a high priced juvenile callboy. This is one major hoot of a teenage prostitute, and has shared the bouncing bed with more politicos and entertainment moguls then any hooker this side of Mary Magdelene. In fact he is the new milineums Magdelene. On my way out of the club at 3am i ran into Tim Blue´s lover, David the famed Jamaican concert pianist. David told me that he is moving to Prague. He´s lived in Berlin for more then 20 years, so i have to give him credit for picking up and making roots in some other enchanted garden. David and i are the same age, and it takes a lot for us old gals to purge and start over again somewhere else. I still cant believe i left LA and moved to Europa. It all seems like a dream that i cant somehow wake up from.
I really hate drunks. Walking home some fugly man with bad teeth approached me looking for a hot top to penetrate his sphincter. If he wasnt so drunk he would have noticed that i don´t exactly give off a hot top vibe, but his desperality got the better of him. I left him high wide and fugger, shaking his head and wondering what bunch of beads had hit him over his natty head.
Was invited to the Vivienne Westwood Anglomania show as part of Berlin´s Fashion Week. Poor Berlin still has long way to go in the fashion department. What makes Berlin great is that it is a city that is very much seperate from the rest of the world on many fronts. With Fashion Week that uniqueness is encumbered by a sense of trying too hard, and what a shame. Just relax Berlina and be yourself, salty warts and all, you are not Paris, Milan or New York and never will be which is a good thing. But what really got my goad is that people were bringing their children, including new bornes to the fashion show. Get a friggen baby sitter! Sitting above me was Tan Bihn Nguyen, the divine makeup artiste and my Cheap Blacky scene stealing co-star with his bearded and bubbly friend who works with the New York based designer Kai Kühne. I also ran into Gabriel Von Loebel, the minister of information with the Viennese art kollective Gelitin, who was with his very attractive lady friend Sasha. Most of the crowd was dull.
People in Berlin either dress ultra conservative in a boring way or wild in an icky Love Parade fashion. The same goes way with sex, they either only want to fist you or cuddle and nothing in between. I was seated in the first row next to Kim Cattrall, who is now an a-list star due to the phenomenal success of that awful Sex and the City feature film. Kim and i go way back to 1995 when i co-starred with her in the movie Live Nude Girls, one of my few mainstream films. The movie wasnt that good, but the character Kim played forshadowed her role as Samantha in Sex in the City. Canuckian Ms. Cattrall is a good time Sally of the first magnitude, I am happy that she is getting lots of attention after years of being a Hollywood workhorse. Remember she started her career as a sexy ingenue in the original Porky´s. Ms Cattrall surprised me that she could speak fluent German, which was delighting the massive whordes of photographers surrounding us, and Ms. Westwood who sat on the other side of Kim. Before the photog anslaught Ms. Westwood asked me about my cousin Carla of the pioneering LA punk band The Controllers. Carla Duplantier lived in London and was in the band Jimmy The Hoover, she also modeled for Vivienne Westwood. Across the runway from us sat a smug looking Rupert Everett handsome despite the sour expression on his face. Maybe that look was directed at me because he had read what i wrote about him in Butt Magazine. The best thing about a Vivienne Westwood show is Vivienne Westwood, who is the best model of her own designs. She looked divine, much better then the clunky horsefaced mannequins who trotted down the gangplank. Someone needs to teach these girls how to walk in high heels. Even the one boy in the show, a John Wayne is big leggy blondine looked like he wanted to be somewhere else.