QUEEN DER WOCHE
So wonderous to be in Europa during the pagan holiday celebrations, and working with the lovely and talented Cheap kollective de Berlin. Its official. I've signed my contracts with Theare an der Parkue where i will have steady employ for a year with the Cheap production of Max und Moritz.
Cheap's minister of disinformation Marcu Siegel has been programming at the Arsenal Film Forum with delicious and strikingly successful results. His underground film series began with a boomba retro spectacle of the German guru of subterranean cinema Wilhelm Hein. You Killed the Underground or the Real Meaning of Kunst Bleibt . . .Bleibt. Wilhelm and his art photog girlfriend Annette Frick are the ultimate joys to be around. They are smart, sexy and super knowledgeable about EVERYTHING.
The Arsenal is like my second home in Berlina, nice crowds came out to see Electrocute Your Stars with hilarious George Kuchar, Bird, Bath and Beyond with his brother Mike Kuchar, Chumlum von Ron Rice and Ken Jacobs Little Stabs of Happiness featuring all the downtown new york cineastezzara superstars Jack Smith, Mario Montez, and the usual gang of flickfits. I've also fallen madly in love again with Curt McDowell and his bubblicious butt, and brilliant performance in The Devils Cleavage.
Hot greek studkin supreme, Vassily Bourikas presented a special screening at a reconstituted church, of Tomothy Carey's mad opus The World's Greatest Sinner. This movie was filmed in and around late 50's Pasadena, and made me a little homesick for LA, but only a smidgeon, believe you meesis, i really don't miss lady LA one bit, just Salvadoran pupusas and my sweet friends.
Bros Timothy Blue has cooked me some fancy gourmet meals at his comfy, zen style flat, and treated me to alcoholika night at Frankenstein 5000 bar in Kruetzburg where we ran into production designer Fred Pommerhn, who is working on an edgy new version of Frank Kafka's The Metamorphis for children. Bros Daniela Romana hosted a fantastic Chanukah Latka din din that included his saucy Southern baptist take of Nig Nog. All the Cheapies were at the Chanukah din including Marcu and gorgeous fearless leader of Cheap Suzi Su, who will host one of her big supper parties on Christmas day which i'm really looking forward to.
I'm once again staying at the Johanes Hotel, a tiny boutique establishment near the Hebbel theatre, which includes a subcontinental breakfast of continentinal proportions.
Rehearsals have been going well. I've even written two brand new songs The Love Camel, which sounds very Raw Power mixed with L7, and a funky ditty called The Shakiest Gun In the West. So nice working on music again with Mickey One Halves and Ibadette of The Super 700. They played some of their latest stuff for me and i was really impressed. The Super 700 are poised for mega stardom . I have to write about them for Zoo magazine.
THE
. . .From the Counsel of Inter-Continental Balistic Principalities
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Sunday, December 24, 2006
Friday, December 08, 2006
!NO CONTABAN CON MI ASTUCIA!
Be careful who you flirt with. James Murdock the dorkiest of Rupert Murdock’s sons is now stalking me. He is bonafide cookoo for cocoa tranny girl cocke. I am a notorious Anglophile, and I usually can’t resist the peaches and cream complexion of empire boys, but I find Jimmy-Z a tad creepy, and whenever I’ve been around him my red flags fly at full mast. Perhaps I should accept his overtures, a lady can’t have too many wealthy admirers.
Second thought, I’d make a lousy kept woman. Men of power and priveledge just aren’t that interesting to me. They are such dullards.
On a joyeous note, my black sister niecyela, the gorgeous Lisa Teasley, famous young novelist, whose latest tome Heat Signature is garnering lots of literary buzz, treated me to a delightful luncheon at the legendary eatery Phillipe’s. Lisa also wrote a BBC TV film set in a high school that will air in the states next year, and just completed a book tour of the country. Lady T regaled me with hilarious tales of her adventures in the deep south. At Phillipes we both had the scrumpteous split pea soup and the house chablis, and was asked by A-list movie star Leonardo DiCaprio who shared our table, accompanied by bodyguards, if we had tried the famed pickled eggs in beet juice. Leo was looking very ruggedly handsome, and I didn’t notice him until he spoke to us, I was so engaged in animated conversation with Lisa. Something tells me he wasn’t use to going someplace where there were no paparazzi waiting for him, and at 2:30 it was past the lunch rush, so the place was pretty empty, just the way I like it. No one else in the working class restaurant recognized him, and if you’re a major star, not being recognized and fussed over can be pretty daunting to a super huge id. Lisa didn’t recognize him, and I never mentioned to her who he was after our exchange, which was very pleasant. Even his bodyguards looked a little concerned, like how could we not know who had deem speak to us. The last time I saw Mr. DiCaprio was back in 1994 when he played with his band, the name of which I can’t remember at my sunday afternoon punk rock beer bust Club Sucker, and before that in the early 1990’s he use to hang out at the Amok Bookstore in Los Feliz Village. He lived on Ambrose Street with his mother, right next door to writer Dennis Cooper, who he had a brief homoliterary fling with after Dennis’s former lover Mark Ewert flew the chickenhawk coop. I lived down from them on Finley and Hillhurst next to the restaurant Farfella. See what you learn from Vaginal Davis, all the darkest secrets of Smallywood.
Be careful who you flirt with. James Murdock the dorkiest of Rupert Murdock’s sons is now stalking me. He is bonafide cookoo for cocoa tranny girl cocke. I am a notorious Anglophile, and I usually can’t resist the peaches and cream complexion of empire boys, but I find Jimmy-Z a tad creepy, and whenever I’ve been around him my red flags fly at full mast. Perhaps I should accept his overtures, a lady can’t have too many wealthy admirers.
Second thought, I’d make a lousy kept woman. Men of power and priveledge just aren’t that interesting to me. They are such dullards.
On a joyeous note, my black sister niecyela, the gorgeous Lisa Teasley, famous young novelist, whose latest tome Heat Signature is garnering lots of literary buzz, treated me to a delightful luncheon at the legendary eatery Phillipe’s. Lisa also wrote a BBC TV film set in a high school that will air in the states next year, and just completed a book tour of the country. Lady T regaled me with hilarious tales of her adventures in the deep south. At Phillipes we both had the scrumpteous split pea soup and the house chablis, and was asked by A-list movie star Leonardo DiCaprio who shared our table, accompanied by bodyguards, if we had tried the famed pickled eggs in beet juice. Leo was looking very ruggedly handsome, and I didn’t notice him until he spoke to us, I was so engaged in animated conversation with Lisa. Something tells me he wasn’t use to going someplace where there were no paparazzi waiting for him, and at 2:30 it was past the lunch rush, so the place was pretty empty, just the way I like it. No one else in the working class restaurant recognized him, and if you’re a major star, not being recognized and fussed over can be pretty daunting to a super huge id. Lisa didn’t recognize him, and I never mentioned to her who he was after our exchange, which was very pleasant. Even his bodyguards looked a little concerned, like how could we not know who had deem speak to us. The last time I saw Mr. DiCaprio was back in 1994 when he played with his band, the name of which I can’t remember at my sunday afternoon punk rock beer bust Club Sucker, and before that in the early 1990’s he use to hang out at the Amok Bookstore in Los Feliz Village. He lived on Ambrose Street with his mother, right next door to writer Dennis Cooper, who he had a brief homoliterary fling with after Dennis’s former lover Mark Ewert flew the chickenhawk coop. I lived down from them on Finley and Hillhurst next to the restaurant Farfella. See what you learn from Vaginal Davis, all the darkest secrets of Smallywood.
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
UNE CERTAINE IDE'E DE LA LIBERTE'
Was interviewed by a well known international fashion magazine, and i was shocked when the writer wanted gossip about the owners of the Parlour Club where i use to do my weekly party Bricktops. Not wanting to go into all the sordid details of the severance of our working relationship i simply related to them this:
when i am finished with a person it is forever. I do not think this is necessarily a good way to be. But i endow the people i like with certain beauties and excitement, and when they make me sore all the inspiration dies out of the friendship.
Was interviewed by a well known international fashion magazine, and i was shocked when the writer wanted gossip about the owners of the Parlour Club where i use to do my weekly party Bricktops. Not wanting to go into all the sordid details of the severance of our working relationship i simply related to them this:
when i am finished with a person it is forever. I do not think this is necessarily a good way to be. But i endow the people i like with certain beauties and excitement, and when they make me sore all the inspiration dies out of the friendship.
Friday, December 01, 2006
FEAR OF ZINE FAILURE
Finally I got a chance to see the Hidden Cameras live. Of course they were sensational. I’ve known leader Joel Gibb, for several years, but I still wasn’t prepared for his focused, masculine stage ardour. The Canadian band who are the first Canucks ever signed to Rough Trade Records are the darlings of the music critics, and if you haven’t seen them or heard their music, I urge you to do so immediately. Also at the HC show, Lance the DJ and musician with the musical combo The Raymakers. Lance use to work at Difficult Light Bookstore and Amoeba Records, and was looking lovesexy and Stoakley Carmichaely. Lance use to be lovers with Gus Van Sant’s ex beau and assistant D.J. from Amsterdam. I’ve heard that D.J. has become super Hollywood yogi/Bohdi Tree/fake spiritualista, which is typical when Europeans become successful horror industry queens.
Finally I got a chance to see the Hidden Cameras live. Of course they were sensational. I’ve known leader Joel Gibb, for several years, but I still wasn’t prepared for his focused, masculine stage ardour. The Canadian band who are the first Canucks ever signed to Rough Trade Records are the darlings of the music critics, and if you haven’t seen them or heard their music, I urge you to do so immediately. Also at the HC show, Lance the DJ and musician with the musical combo The Raymakers. Lance use to work at Difficult Light Bookstore and Amoeba Records, and was looking lovesexy and Stoakley Carmichaely. Lance use to be lovers with Gus Van Sant’s ex beau and assistant D.J. from Amsterdam. I’ve heard that D.J. has become super Hollywood yogi/Bohdi Tree/fake spiritualista, which is typical when Europeans become successful horror industry queens.
Friday, November 17, 2006
EINFUHLEN
Ran into hunkasaurus G.S. the Tom of Finland peterbuilt Nicklelodean director of Britney Spear’s kid sister show, who told me about his battle with ampheta-vegi-vitamins. I’d love to be addicted to Crystal Ann Methamfeta-cheese or Sextacy, GBHPTQL, keta-alpine or woofies. Can you imagine someone as naturally insane as I am on illegal drugs? The only drug I’ve actually tried has been rogaine. Which I adored. I also would love to experiment with being the heroine of my own romance novel, and Whitney From Huston’s Whack. Mr. GS was good friends with John Boskovitch, the Boskovitch Farms heir who died of an overdose recently. John was best known as the director of Sandra Bernhard’s Without You I’m Nothing, and for his 80s artwork. John also taught at Otis Parsons and Art Center, and I was a regular visiting artist to his classes. He was a dear man, who sincerely supported my work, but was also troubled. Thank god I wasn’t born into wealth and priveledge. Its tough being poor and living in the gutter, but having money actually makes things harder for you not easier.
I also spied recently Mr. Eric Dane, who plays Dr. McSteamy on the hit ABC TV show Grey’s Anatomy. I’ve seen the show a few times when I’m staying in hotels. I'm one of those creatures without TV, so I don’t get to keep up on the latest boobic tube phenomenas. It seems to me that Grey’s is a remake of the ABC-TV show Gideon’s Crossing which starred Andre’ Brauwer(?spelling). Mr. Dane was a regular on that series as well, and I guested on that program back in 2000 playing a tranny nurse during a Christmas episode. The humpy Mr. Dane was really flirtatious with me. I’m always surprised when mainstream stars even know who I am. Eric Dane in person is even sexier then he appears on the small screen. Eric Dane is married to former Sassy Magazine perenial cover girl Rebecca Gayheart, which is a little disturbing since Ms. Gayheart ran over and killed a little Mexican boy off of Franklin Avenue a few years ago. When I appeared on Gideon’s Crossing I’ll never forget that the series stars Mr. Breauwer, Ruben Blades, Timothy Bottoms and a cute east Asian actor were very sweet and welcoming. But some of the female co-stars weren’t exactly featuring me. They took issue that the hair, make-up and behind the scenes folk treated the doll like a huge star, primping and fussing over her.
***
Saw the latest 007 movie Casino Royale starring blonde bubble butt Daniel Craig and luscious Eva Green. All I can say is that I’ve never been interested in this high profile film series until now. I hate action films, but this one was intelligently paced and beautifully executed, and the torture scene with Mr. Craig is beyond homosexy.
***
This item just reported to me from hot singer Brian Grillo of Extra Fancy fame, Mike Webber the legend behind the infamous South Bay punk band The Nip Drivers just died. Mike was a complete sweetheart, who’ve I’ve known forever. He was a regular at Club Sucker and the Nip Drivers even re-united for one glorious raucaus Sunday at my former punk rock beer bust.
Mr. Mike will be missed by one and all as a queer punk pioneer and a lovely man.
Ran into hunkasaurus G.S. the Tom of Finland peterbuilt Nicklelodean director of Britney Spear’s kid sister show, who told me about his battle with ampheta-vegi-vitamins. I’d love to be addicted to Crystal Ann Methamfeta-cheese or Sextacy, GBHPTQL, keta-alpine or woofies. Can you imagine someone as naturally insane as I am on illegal drugs? The only drug I’ve actually tried has been rogaine. Which I adored. I also would love to experiment with being the heroine of my own romance novel, and Whitney From Huston’s Whack. Mr. GS was good friends with John Boskovitch, the Boskovitch Farms heir who died of an overdose recently. John was best known as the director of Sandra Bernhard’s Without You I’m Nothing, and for his 80s artwork. John also taught at Otis Parsons and Art Center, and I was a regular visiting artist to his classes. He was a dear man, who sincerely supported my work, but was also troubled. Thank god I wasn’t born into wealth and priveledge. Its tough being poor and living in the gutter, but having money actually makes things harder for you not easier.
I also spied recently Mr. Eric Dane, who plays Dr. McSteamy on the hit ABC TV show Grey’s Anatomy. I’ve seen the show a few times when I’m staying in hotels. I'm one of those creatures without TV, so I don’t get to keep up on the latest boobic tube phenomenas. It seems to me that Grey’s is a remake of the ABC-TV show Gideon’s Crossing which starred Andre’ Brauwer(?spelling). Mr. Dane was a regular on that series as well, and I guested on that program back in 2000 playing a tranny nurse during a Christmas episode. The humpy Mr. Dane was really flirtatious with me. I’m always surprised when mainstream stars even know who I am. Eric Dane in person is even sexier then he appears on the small screen. Eric Dane is married to former Sassy Magazine perenial cover girl Rebecca Gayheart, which is a little disturbing since Ms. Gayheart ran over and killed a little Mexican boy off of Franklin Avenue a few years ago. When I appeared on Gideon’s Crossing I’ll never forget that the series stars Mr. Breauwer, Ruben Blades, Timothy Bottoms and a cute east Asian actor were very sweet and welcoming. But some of the female co-stars weren’t exactly featuring me. They took issue that the hair, make-up and behind the scenes folk treated the doll like a huge star, primping and fussing over her.
***
Saw the latest 007 movie Casino Royale starring blonde bubble butt Daniel Craig and luscious Eva Green. All I can say is that I’ve never been interested in this high profile film series until now. I hate action films, but this one was intelligently paced and beautifully executed, and the torture scene with Mr. Craig is beyond homosexy.
***
This item just reported to me from hot singer Brian Grillo of Extra Fancy fame, Mike Webber the legend behind the infamous South Bay punk band The Nip Drivers just died. Mike was a complete sweetheart, who’ve I’ve known forever. He was a regular at Club Sucker and the Nip Drivers even re-united for one glorious raucaus Sunday at my former punk rock beer bust.
Mr. Mike will be missed by one and all as a queer punk pioneer and a lovely man.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
MEATY MEAT SIGNATURE
This sweet little note from my good friend and NYC guru, Billy Miller of the Manhattan Journal of Unnatural Acts:
U R THE Crenshaw Rose (or the Sunset Rose, or the....),
maybe i'm some kind of Detroit or Jersey City weed?
am still in ye olde Projects with an ongoing mice(s) infestation (have made a glue-trap Berlin Wall around certain areas). been in a couple group shows lately and working on a new STH and an arts publication.
planning a trip soon to Toronto too as the Canadian Gay and Lesbian Archives there turns out to have the largest collection of early STHs i've found yet, and they are gonna let me scan all of the issues that i don't have so we can include 'em on the website (which is still proceeding at a snail's pace, but nearing completion...more about that later).have gone on a couple car trips lately. it's an ART overkill lately in the NYC area...this whole art thing is so out of control here now that there is some opening or event or whatever EVERY freaking day of the the freaking week and it's TIRING me the FREAK OUT...i want to support my friends and peeps i admire, but this is just TOO MUCH. NYC is turning into a mall for rich people and upscale shopping and all these rich kid artists are providing them with luxury products for thier fancy abodes. am running out now to meet my new friend Justin Yockel (orginally of Orange County CA)..we're going to a -what else- art event and then a fancy party at a fancy arty rich person's loft space with a fancy arty DJ and performers. here's a url for Justin's website/mag: http://www.scrubmagazine.com/ will write more later.
ALL my LUV!
***
Toronto I adore you. Its been a while since our last time together, but you are still a shiny Norma Shearer of the North. Invited by TAAFI(Toronto Alternative Art Fair International) which took place at the Drake and Gladstone Hotels. I was put up at the Gladstone on the appropriately named West Queen Street. The Gladstone was built in 1889 and my lovely Easy Rider room was designed by artist Andrew Harwood who along with Will Munro of Vaseline fame created this event that features 25 exhibitors and 35 invitational artists. TAAFI is the more underground fun version of the larger Toronto International Art Fair that goes on at the same time, but is too poovah. The world gentrification movement has really taken hold in Toronto. Its not the same city I remember coming to in the 80s during the old punk period of boozecans and what not. There are still some crusty looking people on the streets, and the great thing I love about Canadians is that they are completely CRAZY. Less arrogant then Americans with a great self-depricating sense of humour.
I performed at the Melody Bar inside the Gladstone Hotel along with local queens Keith Cole and Donnarama with DJ’s Luis Jacob and Will Munro. I decided to do a tiny excerpt from my larger piece Orifice Descending, and although it came out very sloppy,--- I didn’t get a proper sound check as the bar was always packed with people in it. Toronto is such a good time Charlie town, that professionalism really didn’t matter. Everyone was drunk and just happy to be anyplace, and I’m not the biggest proponent of slick work, so all was fine and dandy. The young kids who turned out were jubilant, and also there were some academics who have been studying my work who grilled me with a million questions. Ms. Margot Keith the make-up artist to the stars beat me an incredible face, so I looked juicy, wearing my tight fitting Rick Owens ensemble. I played hostess afterwards at Will Munro’s Beaver Café, holding court and drinking so many Vodka Gimlets that I’m surprised I didn’t black out.
The next day I was kidnapped by wonderful Paddy Aldrich of A Walk on the Wild Side, the specialty boutique and art center that has hosted everyone from Willem Dafoe to the Lady John Travolta who is in Toronto chowing down on young Portuegese pinga while filming the movie version of the broadway musical Hairspray. Paddy is a delight and we had a riotious time together laughing and carrying on. One of Miss Paddy’s top roster of drag stars Gartina, cooked a scrumpteous down home meal of ribs and honey garlic chicken which really warms this girls hungry heart. Can’t wait till Miss Gartina opens up her own café----it will be amazing! Paddy also loaded me down with items from her boutique, a cute bob wig, some 1920s style tap shoes, cuban heel and fishnet stockings, oh and some new double D ba-knockers.
I was opperating under such a whirlwind, that I didn’t get to check out much of the art, but I did spend some time in Allyson Mitchell’s fantastic Vagina Dentata in Late Capitalism installation where I also hung with the incredible Druid Wiccan Sorceress collective of M.L.A.(Montecore Liberation Army)
Also had dinner with Judy LaBruce and his cute young bear chasing pal who works on the Canadian TV show Restaurant Make-Over. Was flown to Toronto on US Airways who lost my luggage. Only the second time this has happened to me. Thank god they found my bag with outfit in time for the show. Thanks and kissy kisses to cuddly Ms. Andrew Hardwood, Sholem Krishtalka, Will Munro, soundman Chipper GoLightly, beefcake "And Justice For All", and the gracious, welcoming staff of the Gladstone Hotel, especially all the young kids who work the front desk who took such great loving care of this diva suprema.
This sweet little note from my good friend and NYC guru, Billy Miller of the Manhattan Journal of Unnatural Acts:
U R THE Crenshaw Rose (or the Sunset Rose, or the....),
maybe i'm some kind of Detroit or Jersey City weed?
am still in ye olde Projects with an ongoing mice(s) infestation (have made a glue-trap Berlin Wall around certain areas). been in a couple group shows lately and working on a new STH and an arts publication.
planning a trip soon to Toronto too as the Canadian Gay and Lesbian Archives there turns out to have the largest collection of early STHs i've found yet, and they are gonna let me scan all of the issues that i don't have so we can include 'em on the website (which is still proceeding at a snail's pace, but nearing completion...more about that later).have gone on a couple car trips lately. it's an ART overkill lately in the NYC area...this whole art thing is so out of control here now that there is some opening or event or whatever EVERY freaking day of the the freaking week and it's TIRING me the FREAK OUT...i want to support my friends and peeps i admire, but this is just TOO MUCH. NYC is turning into a mall for rich people and upscale shopping and all these rich kid artists are providing them with luxury products for thier fancy abodes. am running out now to meet my new friend Justin Yockel (orginally of Orange County CA)..we're going to a -what else- art event and then a fancy party at a fancy arty rich person's loft space with a fancy arty DJ and performers. here's a url for Justin's website/mag: http://www.scrubmagazine.com/ will write more later.
ALL my LUV!
***
Toronto I adore you. Its been a while since our last time together, but you are still a shiny Norma Shearer of the North. Invited by TAAFI(Toronto Alternative Art Fair International) which took place at the Drake and Gladstone Hotels. I was put up at the Gladstone on the appropriately named West Queen Street. The Gladstone was built in 1889 and my lovely Easy Rider room was designed by artist Andrew Harwood who along with Will Munro of Vaseline fame created this event that features 25 exhibitors and 35 invitational artists. TAAFI is the more underground fun version of the larger Toronto International Art Fair that goes on at the same time, but is too poovah. The world gentrification movement has really taken hold in Toronto. Its not the same city I remember coming to in the 80s during the old punk period of boozecans and what not. There are still some crusty looking people on the streets, and the great thing I love about Canadians is that they are completely CRAZY. Less arrogant then Americans with a great self-depricating sense of humour.
I performed at the Melody Bar inside the Gladstone Hotel along with local queens Keith Cole and Donnarama with DJ’s Luis Jacob and Will Munro. I decided to do a tiny excerpt from my larger piece Orifice Descending, and although it came out very sloppy,--- I didn’t get a proper sound check as the bar was always packed with people in it. Toronto is such a good time Charlie town, that professionalism really didn’t matter. Everyone was drunk and just happy to be anyplace, and I’m not the biggest proponent of slick work, so all was fine and dandy. The young kids who turned out were jubilant, and also there were some academics who have been studying my work who grilled me with a million questions. Ms. Margot Keith the make-up artist to the stars beat me an incredible face, so I looked juicy, wearing my tight fitting Rick Owens ensemble. I played hostess afterwards at Will Munro’s Beaver Café, holding court and drinking so many Vodka Gimlets that I’m surprised I didn’t black out.
The next day I was kidnapped by wonderful Paddy Aldrich of A Walk on the Wild Side, the specialty boutique and art center that has hosted everyone from Willem Dafoe to the Lady John Travolta who is in Toronto chowing down on young Portuegese pinga while filming the movie version of the broadway musical Hairspray. Paddy is a delight and we had a riotious time together laughing and carrying on. One of Miss Paddy’s top roster of drag stars Gartina, cooked a scrumpteous down home meal of ribs and honey garlic chicken which really warms this girls hungry heart. Can’t wait till Miss Gartina opens up her own café----it will be amazing! Paddy also loaded me down with items from her boutique, a cute bob wig, some 1920s style tap shoes, cuban heel and fishnet stockings, oh and some new double D ba-knockers.
I was opperating under such a whirlwind, that I didn’t get to check out much of the art, but I did spend some time in Allyson Mitchell’s fantastic Vagina Dentata in Late Capitalism installation where I also hung with the incredible Druid Wiccan Sorceress collective of M.L.A.(Montecore Liberation Army)
Also had dinner with Judy LaBruce and his cute young bear chasing pal who works on the Canadian TV show Restaurant Make-Over. Was flown to Toronto on US Airways who lost my luggage. Only the second time this has happened to me. Thank god they found my bag with outfit in time for the show. Thanks and kissy kisses to cuddly Ms. Andrew Hardwood, Sholem Krishtalka, Will Munro, soundman Chipper GoLightly, beefcake "And Justice For All", and the gracious, welcoming staff of the Gladstone Hotel, especially all the young kids who work the front desk who took such great loving care of this diva suprema.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
WHERE CRENSHAW ROSES BLOOM
As an elderly lady i'm surprised by the males of the species who have been chasing me lately. The minute you don't care about men, thats when they are suddenly all over you. My new Berlin honey is a dorky scientist, who deals with human and animal viruses. I'm also seeing a muscular, wealthy, Korean financial analyst, who has a really large penis, which totally contradicts the stereotype of Asian men. And if that isn't enough action, actors Sergi Lo'pez, Eric Mabius and David Sutcliffe want to hit my racehorse arse. The one boy who really has completely left me enchanted is the musician Piers Faccini, but i think its best to play the proberbial open field so that is why i doodled with David Katzenberg, the son of mogul Jeffrey Katzenberg. I'm not that stoked about David, but i love it when a boy is all horndoggy for me, and will committ suicide unless he gets some.
As an elderly lady i'm surprised by the males of the species who have been chasing me lately. The minute you don't care about men, thats when they are suddenly all over you. My new Berlin honey is a dorky scientist, who deals with human and animal viruses. I'm also seeing a muscular, wealthy, Korean financial analyst, who has a really large penis, which totally contradicts the stereotype of Asian men. And if that isn't enough action, actors Sergi Lo'pez, Eric Mabius and David Sutcliffe want to hit my racehorse arse. The one boy who really has completely left me enchanted is the musician Piers Faccini, but i think its best to play the proberbial open field so that is why i doodled with David Katzenberg, the son of mogul Jeffrey Katzenberg. I'm not that stoked about David, but i love it when a boy is all horndoggy for me, and will committ suicide unless he gets some.
Thursday, November 02, 2006
JE VOUDRAIS
Our third village Judenberg has a nice large hautplotz(town square) We spend two nights in nearby Wollmerdorf at the guest house of Frau Ebner, who asks immediately upon seeing me and Sister Suzi, "Who do these women belong to?" Brother Marcu calmly explained that we belong to Jesus Christo which seemed to put the elderly lady at ease. At breakfast Frau Eb was curious as to what tribe I belonged to, so I told her I was from the ubangi lipped hottentot tribe and sang for her I-commazeemba zeemba zia, the zulu warrior chief. Next door to the guesthouse was a sawmill which made me a little uneasy in that Texas Chainsaw/Twin Peaks manner.
The fireman Commandant Karl Pichler had a gorgeous young full lipped, tiny waisted Lt under his homosexy leadership . All the firemen really got into our performance, and stayed long after filling the ark with water. They even interacted lovingly with the Bros/Sister Cheapies and the townsfolk, who were so thankful to have us in their village, when their young people have abandoned them for the great big city. All the Turkish folks responded excitedly to the photos of handsome Turk film matinee idol Yilmaz Guney, that decorated our vehicle. We’ve really made this piece resonate.
I wasn’t aware that the governor of California Mr. Arnold Schwarzenegger is from the Austrian Steiermark. One of the areas sporting venues was named after him, but they changed it after he executed gangbanger Tookie Williams, and the governatrix was so offended he gave back his Graz city ring.
Our most spirited crowd was Grosse St. Florian, named after the patron saint of firemen. The village was so tiny there was no town square, so we performed our ritual in the fire department parking lot. It seemed like the entire town was there watching us, and some festival bigwigs from Graz also stopped by.
St. Salicia was so intoxicated by grace, that she wasn’t aware that her new flock of followers had trailed her as she walked in a trance through town, and had gathered outside her hotel chanting, "Salicia! Salicia! This was all captured on film by national Germany, Austria and Switzerland TV, and also the periodical Kleine Zeitung.
After all that the last performance in the town of Furstenfeld, near the Hungarian border where there was a Romany massacre, was a little anti-climatic. On the way to Furstenfeld we passed the quaint village of Bad Gams, which should have been some kind of omen. The last performance wasn’t awful. In fact it was one of our best. Instead of baptizing sister Suzi, this time Bros Timothy and Marcu took the plunge in the icy cold spring waters. The audience just looked at us blankly. The only one who got into the mood was our Chinese lunch waiter, a dead ringer for Hong Kong pop music king Edmund Leung.
For our second presentation at the campshow grounds back in Graz, we decided to present a gorgeous tableaux vivant, which hypnotized the audience.
After the presentation our second Wo Ist Party DJ event at the kuntsler center was delicious. So many cute university kids and celebs like the Russian Klitschko boxing twins, heiress Andrea Herberstein, banker Helmut Elsner who has the hots for my racehorse ass, and Courtney Love’s 20 year old trinket boy,Jamie Burke partied with us. I don’t think the partygoers realized a lot of the music I play when I’m behind the wheels of steel are special versions of songs never released, given to me by the various artists who are personal friends of mine.
I didn’t get to see much of the festival offerings as I was kept so busy preparing, performing or recuperating from my shows. I did get to check out the homomodern designy Forum Stadtpark. The No Space is Innocent exhibition featured Eytan Heller’s amazing video Love Sum Game an akshunist Tennis match in Abu Dis(East Jerusalem) between an Israeli and Palestinian over the Seperation Wall, and Michael Glum’s hilarious The Three Failures, an electric hot open air bag lecturina representing the failures of every man made political system via the cities Riga, Malmo and Manhattana.
The festival headquarters first floor girls Miss Eva Huber, Edda Krammer and Anja Herman took Cheap out to experience the joys of a bushenshenke, treating us to the divine experience of sturm, chestnuts and farm fresh food at Kleindeast Kleinst in Gundersdorf and also at the mountaintop Bockmoar. Anja’s beautiful dorky beau Patrik did the driving and we all sang kingdom songs on the long trek through winding roads.
Miss Eva still retains her punk rock spirit. She was known in her day for hosting big gay parties in her tiny hamleta and for scandalizing her conservative Catholic neighbors. I knew there was something about Eva i liked immediately, and that is she is a punkette. Eva has a beautiful teenage daughter and Miss Edda also has two lovely blonde children. Spending time with these gracious fun loving goodtime gals was the best way to end my long stay in Graz.
***
Returning to Berlin I met with Kiki Montparnesse, the main assistant to Jurgen Bruning. Kiki helped me prepare for my International Porn Film Festival lecture/workshop. Kiki is so knowledgeable and easygoing. A pure joy to work with. Later that evening I saw one of Cazzo’s porn featurettes. Cazzo is a Berlin based porn company. The owner of Cazzo, not exactly the happiest looking of male campers, seems to hire boys that are similar looking to himself; tall, lanky and big peniled. Daniela Romana and I also went to see a lecture by the gorgeous French theorist Maxim Cervulle on the post colonial pornography of Beur Boys, Citi Beur and the films of Jean Daniel Cadinot. Maxim is my newest crush. He and his boyfriend may come back to Berlin for our big Art Silvester party. Maxim also came to my soldout workshop/lecture. Ali Janka, and Gabriel of the art group Gelatin, brought a huge posse to support doll, and later took me to dinner. Actor Daniel Bruhl brought his beau Jurgen Vogel who stars with him in a new German movie, tennis great Boris Becker, who is a big dinge queen, was also in the audience, and tried to hook up with me afterwards, but i ignored him. I think Mr. Becker is married and i don't do married men. Experimental film guru Wilhelm Hein and his artist photog galpal Annette Frick really enjoyed the gonzo black gay and straight porn i showed, and lots of boys came up to me with raging hardons. Berlin film festival curator Nanna Heidenreich wrote this about my workshop: "outrageously impressed by Porno Adorno. Ms. Davis is just SO fucking amazing with film, scholarly and sophisticated, a walking encyclopedia -yes, but its especially the way in which she 'reads' film,how she looks at the cinematic... Dr. Vaginal Davis puts adoration back into Adorno!"
Thank you Miss Nanna for the kind words.
After dinner I went to the birthday celebration of tranny legend Zazie De Paris, one of the girlfriends of Jayne County during her early 80s stay in Berlin. Zazie knows everyone and her guest list included the gay major of Berlin, who goes to the opening of a bag of potato chips. Udo Walz, the famous Berlin hairdresser of Chancellor Angela Merkel, Otto Sander, one of Germany’s most famous actors who starred in Wm Wender’s Wings of Desire, John Hayes, the muse of Charles Ludlam and Peter Hujar, make-up artist Andreas Bernhardt, Wieland Speck and Mabel of the Panorama Section of the Berlin Film Festival and Kaz Wushek, attendant of Theatre an der Park Aue, Marguerita Von Bruck and her husband the famed actor Martin Wuttke of the Berliner Ensemble.
***
Fearless Leader Gal Sharkey Suzi of Cheap cooked one of her super superlative meals in honor of Tim and Kjohnny Blue’s visiting mother and step father from Portland, Oregon. It was their first trip to Europe and it was wonderful seeing two middleaged people excited like small children. The step father was a priest with the Catholic Church for over 25 years, and he left the church to marry the beautiful woman he loved, and to help her raise 11 children. Tim and Kjohnny’s mom is one hell of a hot vixen. Her first husband, the father of Tim and Kjohn was a handsome, strapping fireman and goodtime Charlie with a huge peterfication. He died in his prime due to a hospitals mis-diagnosis of a virus he had contracted. From that tragedy spawned a great, and beguiling love story on par with The Thornbirds.
Can you imagine a young mother with a huge brood of kids, left suddenly all alone, but her parish priest secretly in love with her for years, just waiting quietly in the background. And in her hour of needs he really steps up to the plate, as they say in cliché TV chat shows. Well they are a wonderful and warm couple, and it was inspiring meeting the people who raised my wonderful big dicked Blue Bros.
***
Went to Theater An Der Park Aue to see Tim Blue and Steffan perform in the Cheap production of Dr. Seuss’ ABC’s. Children’s Theater in Germania has become a fertile nesting ground for adventureous work. I will be working on a Cheap adaptation of the fabled children’s tale of Max Und Morris in March. I will play the sexy widow, and for the last half a year have been brainstorming with Cheap on the concept. Instead of a Butthead and Beavis like re-telling, which is the obvious way to go, I steered Cheap into making Max Und Morris into a Pachuca styled girl gang and musical review.
The Cheap production of Dr. Seuss, was their first at ParkAue, which is the largest and most prestigious Childrens theater in all of El Europal. In stead of a traditional presentation, Cheap came up with a brilliant interactive series of installations which really engages the children and teachers. Leading the kids are Tim and Steffan, who is one of the theaters stock company actors. Cheap has to use the stock company but can also bring in guests. Tim is such a natural with the children. He is a grown man who has retained his innocense and wonder completely, and the children respond to that----he’s just like them.
Tim and Steffan look great together and have developed a nice Seussian patter. I loved how mean Steffan was to the teacher’s. Watching Steffan, I kept thinking of the Brazilian children TV star XuXa, the petite blonde former softcore porn actress who use to be married to soccer legend Pele. Like XuXa, Steffan can’t hide behind acting technique his utter contempt for children.
***
Lunch meeting with Amelie of Hamburg’s Kognagle with Cheap in crowded trendy Mitte café. Amelie is excited about our Cheap 5 year plan where we hope to create a new arts festival, and start a Cheap School to discover the new generation of Cheapies. Amelie is also going to present the Cheap 2007 performance homage to Fassbinder’s Whitey which now has the working title of "Whitey . . .Sortof" Later in the U-bahn I marvel at how Germany is the land of ill hairdos. When Germans are ugly, they are really really UGLY!
Later in the evening Cheap met up with Bruce "Judy" LaBruce and writer Bruce Benderson for dinner, then afterwards Judy and I accompanied Mr. Benderson on a rent boy pub tour. We wound up spending most of the night at Basco’s, one of Berlin’s premiere establishments of funding exchange for affection and company. One elderly john all in white, makes the rounds of the bars with two young men dressed in matching white suits, like they are his back-up singers. I wonder if they keep the suits on in bed. Only in Berlina kids.
***
Tim of Cheap hosted a Sunday afternoon Margarita Party in my honor. He and his younger brother Kjohnny mixed the sensational drinks, and cooked some red beans with rice-----yummy. The star studded soiree featured all the Cheapies, fearless leader Suzi looking resplendid and sexy in a hot black cocktail number, Daniela Romana and beau Piero of La Colleczione de Piero, Marcu Siegel, photog Annette Frick with legendary filmmaker beau Wilheim Hein, who got into a heated discussion with director Ella Troyano(Latin Boys Go To Hell) about Jack Smith. Ella came to the party with Kiki Monterpernesse and Jurgen Bruning, known mainly as the producer of Bruce La Bruce’s movies, but is also a director in his own right. Jurgen just started his own gay porno company called Wurst Films. Also attending was Gabriel of Geliten, Greek movie director and stud puppy Vassily Bourikas with his superstar blondine soccer playing pal Eidur Gudjohnsen, Israeli art star Assaf Hockman, videomaker Christian Wassnab, famed Germanic writer Daniel Kehlmann(Measuring the World) Ms. LaBruce with actors Rachel Weiss and Garrett Hedlund.
Our third village Judenberg has a nice large hautplotz(town square) We spend two nights in nearby Wollmerdorf at the guest house of Frau Ebner, who asks immediately upon seeing me and Sister Suzi, "Who do these women belong to?" Brother Marcu calmly explained that we belong to Jesus Christo which seemed to put the elderly lady at ease. At breakfast Frau Eb was curious as to what tribe I belonged to, so I told her I was from the ubangi lipped hottentot tribe and sang for her I-commazeemba zeemba zia, the zulu warrior chief. Next door to the guesthouse was a sawmill which made me a little uneasy in that Texas Chainsaw/Twin Peaks manner.
The fireman Commandant Karl Pichler had a gorgeous young full lipped, tiny waisted Lt under his homosexy leadership . All the firemen really got into our performance, and stayed long after filling the ark with water. They even interacted lovingly with the Bros/Sister Cheapies and the townsfolk, who were so thankful to have us in their village, when their young people have abandoned them for the great big city. All the Turkish folks responded excitedly to the photos of handsome Turk film matinee idol Yilmaz Guney, that decorated our vehicle. We’ve really made this piece resonate.
I wasn’t aware that the governor of California Mr. Arnold Schwarzenegger is from the Austrian Steiermark. One of the areas sporting venues was named after him, but they changed it after he executed gangbanger Tookie Williams, and the governatrix was so offended he gave back his Graz city ring.
Our most spirited crowd was Grosse St. Florian, named after the patron saint of firemen. The village was so tiny there was no town square, so we performed our ritual in the fire department parking lot. It seemed like the entire town was there watching us, and some festival bigwigs from Graz also stopped by.
St. Salicia was so intoxicated by grace, that she wasn’t aware that her new flock of followers had trailed her as she walked in a trance through town, and had gathered outside her hotel chanting, "Salicia! Salicia! This was all captured on film by national Germany, Austria and Switzerland TV, and also the periodical Kleine Zeitung.
After all that the last performance in the town of Furstenfeld, near the Hungarian border where there was a Romany massacre, was a little anti-climatic. On the way to Furstenfeld we passed the quaint village of Bad Gams, which should have been some kind of omen. The last performance wasn’t awful. In fact it was one of our best. Instead of baptizing sister Suzi, this time Bros Timothy and Marcu took the plunge in the icy cold spring waters. The audience just looked at us blankly. The only one who got into the mood was our Chinese lunch waiter, a dead ringer for Hong Kong pop music king Edmund Leung.
For our second presentation at the campshow grounds back in Graz, we decided to present a gorgeous tableaux vivant, which hypnotized the audience.
After the presentation our second Wo Ist Party DJ event at the kuntsler center was delicious. So many cute university kids and celebs like the Russian Klitschko boxing twins, heiress Andrea Herberstein, banker Helmut Elsner who has the hots for my racehorse ass, and Courtney Love’s 20 year old trinket boy,Jamie Burke partied with us. I don’t think the partygoers realized a lot of the music I play when I’m behind the wheels of steel are special versions of songs never released, given to me by the various artists who are personal friends of mine.
I didn’t get to see much of the festival offerings as I was kept so busy preparing, performing or recuperating from my shows. I did get to check out the homomodern designy Forum Stadtpark. The No Space is Innocent exhibition featured Eytan Heller’s amazing video Love Sum Game an akshunist Tennis match in Abu Dis(East Jerusalem) between an Israeli and Palestinian over the Seperation Wall, and Michael Glum’s hilarious The Three Failures, an electric hot open air bag lecturina representing the failures of every man made political system via the cities Riga, Malmo and Manhattana.
The festival headquarters first floor girls Miss Eva Huber, Edda Krammer and Anja Herman took Cheap out to experience the joys of a bushenshenke, treating us to the divine experience of sturm, chestnuts and farm fresh food at Kleindeast Kleinst in Gundersdorf and also at the mountaintop Bockmoar. Anja’s beautiful dorky beau Patrik did the driving and we all sang kingdom songs on the long trek through winding roads.
Miss Eva still retains her punk rock spirit. She was known in her day for hosting big gay parties in her tiny hamleta and for scandalizing her conservative Catholic neighbors. I knew there was something about Eva i liked immediately, and that is she is a punkette. Eva has a beautiful teenage daughter and Miss Edda also has two lovely blonde children. Spending time with these gracious fun loving goodtime gals was the best way to end my long stay in Graz.
***
Returning to Berlin I met with Kiki Montparnesse, the main assistant to Jurgen Bruning. Kiki helped me prepare for my International Porn Film Festival lecture/workshop. Kiki is so knowledgeable and easygoing. A pure joy to work with. Later that evening I saw one of Cazzo’s porn featurettes. Cazzo is a Berlin based porn company. The owner of Cazzo, not exactly the happiest looking of male campers, seems to hire boys that are similar looking to himself; tall, lanky and big peniled. Daniela Romana and I also went to see a lecture by the gorgeous French theorist Maxim Cervulle on the post colonial pornography of Beur Boys, Citi Beur and the films of Jean Daniel Cadinot. Maxim is my newest crush. He and his boyfriend may come back to Berlin for our big Art Silvester party. Maxim also came to my soldout workshop/lecture. Ali Janka, and Gabriel of the art group Gelatin, brought a huge posse to support doll, and later took me to dinner. Actor Daniel Bruhl brought his beau Jurgen Vogel who stars with him in a new German movie, tennis great Boris Becker, who is a big dinge queen, was also in the audience, and tried to hook up with me afterwards, but i ignored him. I think Mr. Becker is married and i don't do married men. Experimental film guru Wilhelm Hein and his artist photog galpal Annette Frick really enjoyed the gonzo black gay and straight porn i showed, and lots of boys came up to me with raging hardons. Berlin film festival curator Nanna Heidenreich wrote this about my workshop: "outrageously impressed by Porno Adorno. Ms. Davis is just SO fucking amazing with film, scholarly and sophisticated, a walking encyclopedia -yes, but its especially the way in which she 'reads' film,how she looks at the cinematic... Dr. Vaginal Davis puts adoration back into Adorno!"
Thank you Miss Nanna for the kind words.
After dinner I went to the birthday celebration of tranny legend Zazie De Paris, one of the girlfriends of Jayne County during her early 80s stay in Berlin. Zazie knows everyone and her guest list included the gay major of Berlin, who goes to the opening of a bag of potato chips. Udo Walz, the famous Berlin hairdresser of Chancellor Angela Merkel, Otto Sander, one of Germany’s most famous actors who starred in Wm Wender’s Wings of Desire, John Hayes, the muse of Charles Ludlam and Peter Hujar, make-up artist Andreas Bernhardt, Wieland Speck and Mabel of the Panorama Section of the Berlin Film Festival and Kaz Wushek, attendant of Theatre an der Park Aue, Marguerita Von Bruck and her husband the famed actor Martin Wuttke of the Berliner Ensemble.
***
Fearless Leader Gal Sharkey Suzi of Cheap cooked one of her super superlative meals in honor of Tim and Kjohnny Blue’s visiting mother and step father from Portland, Oregon. It was their first trip to Europe and it was wonderful seeing two middleaged people excited like small children. The step father was a priest with the Catholic Church for over 25 years, and he left the church to marry the beautiful woman he loved, and to help her raise 11 children. Tim and Kjohnny’s mom is one hell of a hot vixen. Her first husband, the father of Tim and Kjohn was a handsome, strapping fireman and goodtime Charlie with a huge peterfication. He died in his prime due to a hospitals mis-diagnosis of a virus he had contracted. From that tragedy spawned a great, and beguiling love story on par with The Thornbirds.
Can you imagine a young mother with a huge brood of kids, left suddenly all alone, but her parish priest secretly in love with her for years, just waiting quietly in the background. And in her hour of needs he really steps up to the plate, as they say in cliché TV chat shows. Well they are a wonderful and warm couple, and it was inspiring meeting the people who raised my wonderful big dicked Blue Bros.
***
Went to Theater An Der Park Aue to see Tim Blue and Steffan perform in the Cheap production of Dr. Seuss’ ABC’s. Children’s Theater in Germania has become a fertile nesting ground for adventureous work. I will be working on a Cheap adaptation of the fabled children’s tale of Max Und Morris in March. I will play the sexy widow, and for the last half a year have been brainstorming with Cheap on the concept. Instead of a Butthead and Beavis like re-telling, which is the obvious way to go, I steered Cheap into making Max Und Morris into a Pachuca styled girl gang and musical review.
The Cheap production of Dr. Seuss, was their first at ParkAue, which is the largest and most prestigious Childrens theater in all of El Europal. In stead of a traditional presentation, Cheap came up with a brilliant interactive series of installations which really engages the children and teachers. Leading the kids are Tim and Steffan, who is one of the theaters stock company actors. Cheap has to use the stock company but can also bring in guests. Tim is such a natural with the children. He is a grown man who has retained his innocense and wonder completely, and the children respond to that----he’s just like them.
Tim and Steffan look great together and have developed a nice Seussian patter. I loved how mean Steffan was to the teacher’s. Watching Steffan, I kept thinking of the Brazilian children TV star XuXa, the petite blonde former softcore porn actress who use to be married to soccer legend Pele. Like XuXa, Steffan can’t hide behind acting technique his utter contempt for children.
***
Lunch meeting with Amelie of Hamburg’s Kognagle with Cheap in crowded trendy Mitte café. Amelie is excited about our Cheap 5 year plan where we hope to create a new arts festival, and start a Cheap School to discover the new generation of Cheapies. Amelie is also going to present the Cheap 2007 performance homage to Fassbinder’s Whitey which now has the working title of "Whitey . . .Sortof" Later in the U-bahn I marvel at how Germany is the land of ill hairdos. When Germans are ugly, they are really really UGLY!
Later in the evening Cheap met up with Bruce "Judy" LaBruce and writer Bruce Benderson for dinner, then afterwards Judy and I accompanied Mr. Benderson on a rent boy pub tour. We wound up spending most of the night at Basco’s, one of Berlin’s premiere establishments of funding exchange for affection and company. One elderly john all in white, makes the rounds of the bars with two young men dressed in matching white suits, like they are his back-up singers. I wonder if they keep the suits on in bed. Only in Berlina kids.
***
Tim of Cheap hosted a Sunday afternoon Margarita Party in my honor. He and his younger brother Kjohnny mixed the sensational drinks, and cooked some red beans with rice-----yummy. The star studded soiree featured all the Cheapies, fearless leader Suzi looking resplendid and sexy in a hot black cocktail number, Daniela Romana and beau Piero of La Colleczione de Piero, Marcu Siegel, photog Annette Frick with legendary filmmaker beau Wilheim Hein, who got into a heated discussion with director Ella Troyano(Latin Boys Go To Hell) about Jack Smith. Ella came to the party with Kiki Monterpernesse and Jurgen Bruning, known mainly as the producer of Bruce La Bruce’s movies, but is also a director in his own right. Jurgen just started his own gay porno company called Wurst Films. Also attending was Gabriel of Geliten, Greek movie director and stud puppy Vassily Bourikas with his superstar blondine soccer playing pal Eidur Gudjohnsen, Israeli art star Assaf Hockman, videomaker Christian Wassnab, famed Germanic writer Daniel Kehlmann(Measuring the World) Ms. LaBruce with actors Rachel Weiss and Garrett Hedlund.
Monday, October 23, 2006
HART! HERZLICH!GEIL!
Of course we got lost on our way to our first town of Murzzuschlag. On the autoban i kept marveling at the engineering wonder of miles long tunnels right through the mountain rotundra. I hate long car rides, i thought the little villages would be closer to Graz, like going from Hollywood to Glendale. Me and fearless leader Suzi of Cheap both get car sick really easily. Brother Marcu Matayasu is a safe driver, but he´s an artist and film theorist, not a transporter, it would have been better if we had a crew, and driver, so that our focus would be solely on the performance action, and not technical set-up.
Murzzuschlag is gorgeous, so south of sound of musicland. The townsfolk are very helpful and friendly despite a depressed economy. Bros. Marcu and Bros Timothy Testes came to Graz a few days ahead of the rest of the gang and did some research on the villages. Graz local Edith, one of the festival programmers, was essential in providing them with a plethora of information.
My theocratic ministry school education was the perfect training ground for our pitch tent revival and for preaching on the highways and byways.
Frau Grunder, the lovely and gracious hippy rock chick propreitress of the Guest House Panorama Blick where we stayed two nights, loved what we did, and said it reminded her of the actions she took part in the 1960s. She even brought her grandchildren.
The fireman boss Brandat Rudolf Schober of Murzzuschlag was rugged and manly, and i wanted to service him with zeal, zest and abandon. He was concerned with our safety, and didn´t think our ark was constructed properly with the correct stabilizers.
Saint Salicia and her rhubarb colored matron hair really has an effect on everyone she meets. A big toothy smile, charm and sincere friendliness goes a long way. All the Cheapies are equally disarming. Bros Tim with his beautiful chrytaline azul eyes, Sister Suzi and her melodious voice, Bros Daniel and his square jawwed masculinity ,and Bros Marcu with that professorial manner, jewish wit and unique pronunciation of German words that the Austrians find so delightful.
***
We decided to get an early start for the second town, the holy city of Mariazell, where the Pope will be visiting soon. On our pilgrams path we pass a house designed by the Austrian Goudy, Hundert Wasser. Entering the hallowed city limits nutbush we are stopped by two policemen who won´t allow us to continue with the metal ark which they deem as much too large for our small compact car. This is something that the firemen of Murzzuschlagg also warned us about. My initial instincts were correct, and i should have said something earlier. We spend a few hours in the mountain rain waiting for someone from the festival to rescue us. Of course our visit to Mariazell is cancelled and we return to Graz. I make it clear that we won´t return back to the field unless the ark is given a full inspection from the Graz police and fire departments.
Steiermark campshow senior assistant, the voluptouos Anna, was wonderful in taking care of my demands in ensuring our safety with the road trips. Anna deserves a big fat raise in salary for putting up with my diva moodyness and fits of negro rage.
On our day off we hang out with rambunctious Polish curator, Adama Budak of the Graz Kunsthause. This museum is in the shape of the Mrs. AIDS virus. Adam loads us with a gaggle of Situationist giftbags, and introduces us to a young humpy Macedonian artist, and attractive British lady musicologist, and her collaborator, plus making sure that we are toasty and drunk off our guords. Its also nice to hang with Hanna Hurtzig of Black Market fame and Amelia of Hamburg´s Kognagle.
The Cheap boys make a brilliantine presentation at the campshow using slides, and a bidding war ensued upon auctioning off some holy water from the ark. It was granada to escape the art world for awhile and go to some tired Graz Gay bars like Gangbang in the Neu Kölln of Graz, the red light district tiny gay lounge Bareback Dirty Rainbow Flag, the twinky dance palace Starpussygrazer, and the cruisebar ManCunt where i was appropriately manhandled in the mazelike darkroom by a large peniled Austrian warhorse. Its so strange in Austria how Heidi Klum is used on almost every advert. Don´t they have any other spokesmodels?
Cheap´s DJ Nancy, and I spinned music for the Festivalzentrum, one evening. We mixed the audience up so that it wouldn´t be just tired kunstlers, who don´t know how to have fun. For once in the Festivalzentrum people danced, flirted and had a good time without acting like icky Mitte queens. Cute Anja brought her young college student boo Patrik, who is adorable and filled with hot bubbly spunk, and an infectious laugh. Met Sony, the wealthy wife of famous Austrian writer Wolfgang Bauer, known for his famous Anti 1968 text from the far left. Miss Sony reminded me of Rachel "DBD" Rosenthal, except she doesn´t carry around with her a pet rat. I loved Sony´s anti-authoritarian spirit. She was breaking glasses, bleeding, throwing shoes, dancing wildly like in her own private mosh pit, and just having a great time in a world that is uniquely her own.
Was introduced to a leggy Austrian calendar model named Tanja Dickbauer who asked me about the Gogol Bordello song i spinned. Flirted with this boy named Julian Khol, who i latter found out is a male model. I wanted him to sit down on my raw face. Re-connected with juicy Miss Sabine of Geliten who i hadn´t seen since Bregenz back in March-April. Enjoyed gossiping with the statuesque beauty of Berlin´s HAU, lady Katherine.
The political climate in Austria is a bit volatile with their right wing parties promelgating quite openly, which is a bit of a shock. Austria seems to breed extremist who range from fascist to wayout artists like Herman Nietz and the Vienna Akshunists. O madame Austria. Somehow you are my kind of ill country.
Of course we got lost on our way to our first town of Murzzuschlag. On the autoban i kept marveling at the engineering wonder of miles long tunnels right through the mountain rotundra. I hate long car rides, i thought the little villages would be closer to Graz, like going from Hollywood to Glendale. Me and fearless leader Suzi of Cheap both get car sick really easily. Brother Marcu Matayasu is a safe driver, but he´s an artist and film theorist, not a transporter, it would have been better if we had a crew, and driver, so that our focus would be solely on the performance action, and not technical set-up.
Murzzuschlag is gorgeous, so south of sound of musicland. The townsfolk are very helpful and friendly despite a depressed economy. Bros. Marcu and Bros Timothy Testes came to Graz a few days ahead of the rest of the gang and did some research on the villages. Graz local Edith, one of the festival programmers, was essential in providing them with a plethora of information.
My theocratic ministry school education was the perfect training ground for our pitch tent revival and for preaching on the highways and byways.
Frau Grunder, the lovely and gracious hippy rock chick propreitress of the Guest House Panorama Blick where we stayed two nights, loved what we did, and said it reminded her of the actions she took part in the 1960s. She even brought her grandchildren.
The fireman boss Brandat Rudolf Schober of Murzzuschlag was rugged and manly, and i wanted to service him with zeal, zest and abandon. He was concerned with our safety, and didn´t think our ark was constructed properly with the correct stabilizers.
Saint Salicia and her rhubarb colored matron hair really has an effect on everyone she meets. A big toothy smile, charm and sincere friendliness goes a long way. All the Cheapies are equally disarming. Bros Tim with his beautiful chrytaline azul eyes, Sister Suzi and her melodious voice, Bros Daniel and his square jawwed masculinity ,and Bros Marcu with that professorial manner, jewish wit and unique pronunciation of German words that the Austrians find so delightful.
***
We decided to get an early start for the second town, the holy city of Mariazell, where the Pope will be visiting soon. On our pilgrams path we pass a house designed by the Austrian Goudy, Hundert Wasser. Entering the hallowed city limits nutbush we are stopped by two policemen who won´t allow us to continue with the metal ark which they deem as much too large for our small compact car. This is something that the firemen of Murzzuschlagg also warned us about. My initial instincts were correct, and i should have said something earlier. We spend a few hours in the mountain rain waiting for someone from the festival to rescue us. Of course our visit to Mariazell is cancelled and we return to Graz. I make it clear that we won´t return back to the field unless the ark is given a full inspection from the Graz police and fire departments.
Steiermark campshow senior assistant, the voluptouos Anna, was wonderful in taking care of my demands in ensuring our safety with the road trips. Anna deserves a big fat raise in salary for putting up with my diva moodyness and fits of negro rage.
On our day off we hang out with rambunctious Polish curator, Adama Budak of the Graz Kunsthause. This museum is in the shape of the Mrs. AIDS virus. Adam loads us with a gaggle of Situationist giftbags, and introduces us to a young humpy Macedonian artist, and attractive British lady musicologist, and her collaborator, plus making sure that we are toasty and drunk off our guords. Its also nice to hang with Hanna Hurtzig of Black Market fame and Amelia of Hamburg´s Kognagle.
The Cheap boys make a brilliantine presentation at the campshow using slides, and a bidding war ensued upon auctioning off some holy water from the ark. It was granada to escape the art world for awhile and go to some tired Graz Gay bars like Gangbang in the Neu Kölln of Graz, the red light district tiny gay lounge Bareback Dirty Rainbow Flag, the twinky dance palace Starpussygrazer, and the cruisebar ManCunt where i was appropriately manhandled in the mazelike darkroom by a large peniled Austrian warhorse. Its so strange in Austria how Heidi Klum is used on almost every advert. Don´t they have any other spokesmodels?
Cheap´s DJ Nancy, and I spinned music for the Festivalzentrum, one evening. We mixed the audience up so that it wouldn´t be just tired kunstlers, who don´t know how to have fun. For once in the Festivalzentrum people danced, flirted and had a good time without acting like icky Mitte queens. Cute Anja brought her young college student boo Patrik, who is adorable and filled with hot bubbly spunk, and an infectious laugh. Met Sony, the wealthy wife of famous Austrian writer Wolfgang Bauer, known for his famous Anti 1968 text from the far left. Miss Sony reminded me of Rachel "DBD" Rosenthal, except she doesn´t carry around with her a pet rat. I loved Sony´s anti-authoritarian spirit. She was breaking glasses, bleeding, throwing shoes, dancing wildly like in her own private mosh pit, and just having a great time in a world that is uniquely her own.
Was introduced to a leggy Austrian calendar model named Tanja Dickbauer who asked me about the Gogol Bordello song i spinned. Flirted with this boy named Julian Khol, who i latter found out is a male model. I wanted him to sit down on my raw face. Re-connected with juicy Miss Sabine of Geliten who i hadn´t seen since Bregenz back in March-April. Enjoyed gossiping with the statuesque beauty of Berlin´s HAU, lady Katherine.
The political climate in Austria is a bit volatile with their right wing parties promelgating quite openly, which is a bit of a shock. Austria seems to breed extremist who range from fascist to wayout artists like Herman Nietz and the Vienna Akshunists. O madame Austria. Somehow you are my kind of ill country.
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
SCHLUSS MIT DER ANSTANDIGEN VERSION DER WELT
At last, the first in a series of Graz, Austria reports. There will also be some articles and essays appearing in various arts magazines and newspapers, of course the texts will feature a slightly different emphasis, depending on the particular periodical or publication.
Graz is an exceedingly lovely city with a population of about 300,000. Its not far from Wien(Vienna) the old world capital of culture and art. On one of my days off i actually got to be all tourista and mount the 260 famed Schlossberg Steps, and was in awe of the view of this stunning 800 year old city.
Adored the Steirischer Herbst Festival staff, they were all so helpful and accomodating. The serene Sabine Achleitner, project manager and educational coordinator, has been with the festival for over 10 years, and is a font of valued information. Her husband was a leading Graz artist, and they both worked with many legends. The other pretty ladies of the first floor offices also helped to make my three week stay enjoyable. Special kisses and a million thanks to Miss Eva Huber, Edda Krammer, Anja Herman, and Christine Sbaschnigg. I should also mention Richard Schweitzer, the financial director of the festival, who was so encouraging, and festival director Veronika who is very stylish, and looks like a cross between Sophia Loren and Anna Magnani.
The S.H. officina is located in a former palast, that once belonged to a promiscuous duke. The building takes up half a city block in the old towne section, built in 1630, and features hand painted wallpaper that remains intact. Someone from the original family still occupies one of the suites, as well as a right wing Nationalistic Austrian version of the John Birch Society, which is a little creepy.
About 300 years ago a princess in an elaborate ball gown tripped on the main staircase, falling to her death. I´d love to turn that into a performance piece.
***
Kollective Cheap, and I are part of the Camp Show Styria. From what i can gather, camping in the countryside is a popular past time here. I am not a nature girl, but a glamour girl, so camping holds no fascination for me. The basic premise behind this part of the festival is that 5 groups go out to the small hamlets outside of Graz, to partake in some sort of aktionist contact with the people.
Bringing art to the people is a bit of a bougie conceit, very middleclass, that makes me groan. In America its a big thing, because arts organizations can always get funding for it. Since the 1980s its rarely worked, especially in France where they built all those fancy theatres and homo modern art museums in the boondocks that only busloads of Parisians in fur coats go to. The people they built them for can neither afford to go or desire to go to places that aren´t exactly welcoming.
One of the five art groups in the Camp Show that really interacts with the townspeople in an admirable way is Theater Bahnhof, who are based in Graz. Their camper they used as a casting couch for their production of Steinbeck´s Grapes of Wrath, which had real resonance in that the countryfolk resemble Amerikkka´s Oakies with faces that Fellini would love to buy. I really liked chatting with the leader of Theater Bahnhoff who is this grizzled, good time Gary kind of man, who drinks a lot,just like me.
Plan B, (Sophia,Dan & Missy Baby Ruby Begonia) an endearing British trio, based in Berlin, drove a camper castle inviting people to high tea, and made a series of striking short films from their journeys. One of the sponsors on their transport was from a right wing automobile club, which kept some people from tea time. It would have been nice if someone had been warned them ahead of time about this little fact.
Sweet Doris Dziersk of Germany and her companion the cuddly local intern Johannes Sbaschnigg fashioned their trailer as a traveling greenhouse. Bejamiin Foerster-Baldenius, also of Germany, who is an intermedia architect, and the mastermind of Berlin´s biggest summertime art project The Mountain, from last year, turned his camper into a blow-up planetarium.
A dimunitive, muscular man named Helmut Springer and his lookalike wife built for Cheap Kollective a giant metal ark of the covenant. We were the only ones of the five artist groups that didn´t have a traditional tricked out cammper shell. The original design i was informed of was that the trailer would unfold into a baptismal pool with a stage and ramp. The new designed seemed a little awkward. We had mapped out our strategy in a particular way and the ark didn´t fit with that. I´m tall and it was impossible to stand and look directly into the metal ark. We all decided to be flexible, and work with what was given us.
I was bringing out of retirement my famed persona of the Right Reverend Most High Saint Salicia Tate of the Congregation of Endor. The Cheap Kollective would become her accompany of Comrade Brother/Sisters. A self proclaimed beatified Negro saint would be something that the Austrians would have never experienced.
We figured that a lot of the variables of our akshun would have to be worked out in the field. The local firemen of each town, would be somewhat of a collaborator, but all our contact with them would be as a cold call, which doesn´t qualify to me as a proper collaboration. They were aware of us in advance, but that was about it. They didn´t need to know everything about our project but if one Cheap Kollective member had been able to come out a few weeks in advance as a location scout to make contact with the locals, and the fireman, and get a lay of the land it would have made our piece much better, but now i realize that our aktions weren´t really considered as the important part of the Camp Show Styria project, only the Graz based "Camp Show" was deemed, the actual "Art", which was somewhat insulting. That old "curator/concept as artist" thingy that rears its ugly head in the states and in some circles in Europe, became quite apparent here. Not to be all paranoid, but my red flag alert went off.
Miss "Heike-Heiku" Heiko Pfost-ers Olde Fashion, the dramaturgy/allergy acting here as curatortrix, reminded me of dozens of Amerikan style theatre-queens. Indeed its a universal type of gay man as brittle-blond-woman-careerist. I predict a brilliant future for easy target Heike, in his new 30 year post in Berlin. I´m sure with that sterling, notary public personality, little Miss Heike will transform the o so creative Mitte arts district into the proud new home of flora dora campshow thrills, and crisp strategic air command ballroom dancing eventas. Yippy yi yi!!!!!
"Club Med Real Madrid" of Berlin along with the gallant lady Miss Heike came up with the camp show, and the book report presentations that each group had to make after being in the field. I had been told in advance that Club Real were part of that Berlin based Hetero kitch scene. I felt an instant rapport with Tomas and George of Club Real. George is handsome, sexy and charming. He and Tomas are nice and very low key. Marianne and the small boned Kristof are the groups showboaters. They would make great German TV presenters for an early morning chat show or late nite info-mercial. During the third week of the campshow Marianne retreated to an Austrian version of the Betty Ford Clinic for nervous exhaustion i think. She did have a difficult job hosting 5 days a week, with the scrutiny of a brutal local press. I wish i could have joined her at the Betty Ford Clinic or at least Austrian´s Hazeldine. I didn´t realize driving out in the country so
often would be as taxing as it became.
Next Up: What actually happened in the field, and all about being stopped by the Austrian Police Enforcers
At last, the first in a series of Graz, Austria reports. There will also be some articles and essays appearing in various arts magazines and newspapers, of course the texts will feature a slightly different emphasis, depending on the particular periodical or publication.
Graz is an exceedingly lovely city with a population of about 300,000. Its not far from Wien(Vienna) the old world capital of culture and art. On one of my days off i actually got to be all tourista and mount the 260 famed Schlossberg Steps, and was in awe of the view of this stunning 800 year old city.
Adored the Steirischer Herbst Festival staff, they were all so helpful and accomodating. The serene Sabine Achleitner, project manager and educational coordinator, has been with the festival for over 10 years, and is a font of valued information. Her husband was a leading Graz artist, and they both worked with many legends. The other pretty ladies of the first floor offices also helped to make my three week stay enjoyable. Special kisses and a million thanks to Miss Eva Huber, Edda Krammer, Anja Herman, and Christine Sbaschnigg. I should also mention Richard Schweitzer, the financial director of the festival, who was so encouraging, and festival director Veronika who is very stylish, and looks like a cross between Sophia Loren and Anna Magnani.
The S.H. officina is located in a former palast, that once belonged to a promiscuous duke. The building takes up half a city block in the old towne section, built in 1630, and features hand painted wallpaper that remains intact. Someone from the original family still occupies one of the suites, as well as a right wing Nationalistic Austrian version of the John Birch Society, which is a little creepy.
About 300 years ago a princess in an elaborate ball gown tripped on the main staircase, falling to her death. I´d love to turn that into a performance piece.
***
Kollective Cheap, and I are part of the Camp Show Styria. From what i can gather, camping in the countryside is a popular past time here. I am not a nature girl, but a glamour girl, so camping holds no fascination for me. The basic premise behind this part of the festival is that 5 groups go out to the small hamlets outside of Graz, to partake in some sort of aktionist contact with the people.
Bringing art to the people is a bit of a bougie conceit, very middleclass, that makes me groan. In America its a big thing, because arts organizations can always get funding for it. Since the 1980s its rarely worked, especially in France where they built all those fancy theatres and homo modern art museums in the boondocks that only busloads of Parisians in fur coats go to. The people they built them for can neither afford to go or desire to go to places that aren´t exactly welcoming.
One of the five art groups in the Camp Show that really interacts with the townspeople in an admirable way is Theater Bahnhof, who are based in Graz. Their camper they used as a casting couch for their production of Steinbeck´s Grapes of Wrath, which had real resonance in that the countryfolk resemble Amerikkka´s Oakies with faces that Fellini would love to buy. I really liked chatting with the leader of Theater Bahnhoff who is this grizzled, good time Gary kind of man, who drinks a lot,just like me.
Plan B, (Sophia,Dan & Missy Baby Ruby Begonia) an endearing British trio, based in Berlin, drove a camper castle inviting people to high tea, and made a series of striking short films from their journeys. One of the sponsors on their transport was from a right wing automobile club, which kept some people from tea time. It would have been nice if someone had been warned them ahead of time about this little fact.
Sweet Doris Dziersk of Germany and her companion the cuddly local intern Johannes Sbaschnigg fashioned their trailer as a traveling greenhouse. Bejamiin Foerster-Baldenius, also of Germany, who is an intermedia architect, and the mastermind of Berlin´s biggest summertime art project The Mountain, from last year, turned his camper into a blow-up planetarium.
A dimunitive, muscular man named Helmut Springer and his lookalike wife built for Cheap Kollective a giant metal ark of the covenant. We were the only ones of the five artist groups that didn´t have a traditional tricked out cammper shell. The original design i was informed of was that the trailer would unfold into a baptismal pool with a stage and ramp. The new designed seemed a little awkward. We had mapped out our strategy in a particular way and the ark didn´t fit with that. I´m tall and it was impossible to stand and look directly into the metal ark. We all decided to be flexible, and work with what was given us.
I was bringing out of retirement my famed persona of the Right Reverend Most High Saint Salicia Tate of the Congregation of Endor. The Cheap Kollective would become her accompany of Comrade Brother/Sisters. A self proclaimed beatified Negro saint would be something that the Austrians would have never experienced.
We figured that a lot of the variables of our akshun would have to be worked out in the field. The local firemen of each town, would be somewhat of a collaborator, but all our contact with them would be as a cold call, which doesn´t qualify to me as a proper collaboration. They were aware of us in advance, but that was about it. They didn´t need to know everything about our project but if one Cheap Kollective member had been able to come out a few weeks in advance as a location scout to make contact with the locals, and the fireman, and get a lay of the land it would have made our piece much better, but now i realize that our aktions weren´t really considered as the important part of the Camp Show Styria project, only the Graz based "Camp Show" was deemed, the actual "Art", which was somewhat insulting. That old "curator/concept as artist" thingy that rears its ugly head in the states and in some circles in Europe, became quite apparent here. Not to be all paranoid, but my red flag alert went off.
Miss "Heike-Heiku" Heiko Pfost-ers Olde Fashion, the dramaturgy/allergy acting here as curatortrix, reminded me of dozens of Amerikan style theatre-queens. Indeed its a universal type of gay man as brittle-blond-woman-careerist. I predict a brilliant future for easy target Heike, in his new 30 year post in Berlin. I´m sure with that sterling, notary public personality, little Miss Heike will transform the o so creative Mitte arts district into the proud new home of flora dora campshow thrills, and crisp strategic air command ballroom dancing eventas. Yippy yi yi!!!!!
"Club Med Real Madrid" of Berlin along with the gallant lady Miss Heike came up with the camp show, and the book report presentations that each group had to make after being in the field. I had been told in advance that Club Real were part of that Berlin based Hetero kitch scene. I felt an instant rapport with Tomas and George of Club Real. George is handsome, sexy and charming. He and Tomas are nice and very low key. Marianne and the small boned Kristof are the groups showboaters. They would make great German TV presenters for an early morning chat show or late nite info-mercial. During the third week of the campshow Marianne retreated to an Austrian version of the Betty Ford Clinic for nervous exhaustion i think. She did have a difficult job hosting 5 days a week, with the scrutiny of a brutal local press. I wish i could have joined her at the Betty Ford Clinic or at least Austrian´s Hazeldine. I didn´t realize driving out in the country so
often would be as taxing as it became.
Next Up: What actually happened in the field, and all about being stopped by the Austrian Police Enforcers
Thursday, October 05, 2006
DIE KUNST MACHST DU
Just returned from the second trek out into the Steiermark of Austria. What an adventure. I won´t go into details at this time, but what i will relay, that while in the boutique town of Murau the American pop starlet Justin Timberlake, who was filming a new music video, was staying in the same hotel that we were using as a dressing room. With my bad sense of direction i accidently on purpose walked into his suite to use the facilities, and got to see the new king of pop in complete dishabille. Let me tell you it was quite a thrill, Herr Timberlake is blessed with 25 centimeters of perfect man endowment. It is no wonder he was able to have his way with notorious size prinzessin Janet Jackson. I was impressed that there is much more to him then a sexy back.
Just returned from the second trek out into the Steiermark of Austria. What an adventure. I won´t go into details at this time, but what i will relay, that while in the boutique town of Murau the American pop starlet Justin Timberlake, who was filming a new music video, was staying in the same hotel that we were using as a dressing room. With my bad sense of direction i accidently on purpose walked into his suite to use the facilities, and got to see the new king of pop in complete dishabille. Let me tell you it was quite a thrill, Herr Timberlake is blessed with 25 centimeters of perfect man endowment. It is no wonder he was able to have his way with notorious size prinzessin Janet Jackson. I was impressed that there is much more to him then a sexy back.
Friday, September 29, 2006
VOULEZ-VOUS FOUCAULT?
Thank you to all who have been emailing me wanting info on my exploits here in Graz at the Steirischer Herbst Festival. Its been a whirlwind let me tell you, and its amazing how things get out all over the world about whats been happening to me. The rumour mill is rampant. One arts editor in Stockholm heard that i was arrested by right wing extremists. And i promise a complete report in this very blog, plus the articles i committed to write on all my shenanigans for those magazines and papers that desire things told as only a true Prinzessin von Ho!hernzollern can give you. I am kept extremely busy with this particular Cheap Kollective project, plus i also have writing work that i have to finish for my agent with the upcoming book proposal. 1,000,000 apologees for the short replies to emugs, but i get over 30 a day and the festival headqtrs is a bit of a treck from my artist residence, and with my bad sense of direction i can´t find it alone, so i have to wait for a brother Cheap member to escort me. A lady with a large ass like mine should never wander a city of virile men alone.
Thank you to all who have been emailing me wanting info on my exploits here in Graz at the Steirischer Herbst Festival. Its been a whirlwind let me tell you, and its amazing how things get out all over the world about whats been happening to me. The rumour mill is rampant. One arts editor in Stockholm heard that i was arrested by right wing extremists. And i promise a complete report in this very blog, plus the articles i committed to write on all my shenanigans for those magazines and papers that desire things told as only a true Prinzessin von Ho!hernzollern can give you. I am kept extremely busy with this particular Cheap Kollective project, plus i also have writing work that i have to finish for my agent with the upcoming book proposal. 1,000,000 apologees for the short replies to emugs, but i get over 30 a day and the festival headqtrs is a bit of a treck from my artist residence, and with my bad sense of direction i can´t find it alone, so i have to wait for a brother Cheap member to escort me. A lady with a large ass like mine should never wander a city of virile men alone.
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
VERHALTEN IM BRANDFALL
Just came back from the first stop in the lush Austrian countryside. The people of the tiny town of Murzzuschlag were so nice to us. checked emails before i left, and someone sent me a note that the owners of the funeral parlour lenny and squiggy and some icky woman are opening soon a place called T on Fairfax. i know that my supporters won´t be patronizing this establishment. More on my Austrian tent tour with St. Salicia and her Bruder/Sfesters when i have more time.
Just came back from the first stop in the lush Austrian countryside. The people of the tiny town of Murzzuschlag were so nice to us. checked emails before i left, and someone sent me a note that the owners of the funeral parlour lenny and squiggy and some icky woman are opening soon a place called T on Fairfax. i know that my supporters won´t be patronizing this establishment. More on my Austrian tent tour with St. Salicia and her Bruder/Sfesters when i have more time.
Friday, September 22, 2006
LUST GARDEN
Dinner with Joel Gibb of the Hidden Cameras and his sweet vacationining Canuck posse. Drinks at Barbie Dienoff met Rob Roth and the Big Ass Art Project Group of New York.
My Judean prince Assaf is now a member of that company who are premiering a new piece in Berlin and Paris. Mr. Roth use to promote Click + Drag with Jackie 60s Johnny Dynell and Chi Chi Valente. Joel Gibb has a nice new German beau who is an architect.
Also ran into Violetta, the androgen student who came to my lecture early in the year at the Free University.
***
Bumped into Marc Ashenbrenner at the Alex. Marc is part of the international crew of Geliten. Tried calling him later but the numbers did not work or perhaps i dialed wrong. Wound up at Frankenstein 5000 with Daniela Romana and was recognized by young abstract painter Matt Connors who just moved to Berlin from New York. Matt went to college with Amra Brooks and is friends with art photog Ryan McGinley. He bought me many fancy bottled beers and we talked till 4am without going into the backroom.
Met with Jurgen Bruning at the gorgeous Bonjour Tristesse Delux Gallery on Karl Marx Allee in Fredrickshein. My Porno Adorno workshop will be held on Oct 21st at the Kant Kino in Charlotenberg from 8pm-10pm
***
Arrive in beautiful Graz Austria for the Steirischer Festival. Warmly greeted by the patrician festival director Veronica Kaup wearing an elegant Comme Des Garscon dress. The other staffers prepared a welcome brunch. Met Haiko, curator of the camp show, Anna his assistant. Rehearsed with Marianna, George and Tomas of Club Real, the wonderful Sabina, one of the main coordinators along with Johannes, Plan B´s Sophia, Dan and baby Ruby utterly delightful. Great to see Benny again, the architect who designed the Mountain Project in Berlin and his sexy girlfriend Hanna. Everything seems to be moving along well, and i´m engaged and excited about touring the small religious towns presenting St. Salicia Tate to the people. Can´t wait to try some of the Sturm, a fresh wine---the first of the year.
Went to opening party at the Helmut List Halle Event Hall and met our first set of fans----Eve and the Festival secretarial and administrative assistant klan. Today i am writing this very blog from the Festival headquarters in the former Palast of the Duke of Graz. How is that for hifallutin
Dinner with Joel Gibb of the Hidden Cameras and his sweet vacationining Canuck posse. Drinks at Barbie Dienoff met Rob Roth and the Big Ass Art Project Group of New York.
My Judean prince Assaf is now a member of that company who are premiering a new piece in Berlin and Paris. Mr. Roth use to promote Click + Drag with Jackie 60s Johnny Dynell and Chi Chi Valente. Joel Gibb has a nice new German beau who is an architect.
Also ran into Violetta, the androgen student who came to my lecture early in the year at the Free University.
***
Bumped into Marc Ashenbrenner at the Alex. Marc is part of the international crew of Geliten. Tried calling him later but the numbers did not work or perhaps i dialed wrong. Wound up at Frankenstein 5000 with Daniela Romana and was recognized by young abstract painter Matt Connors who just moved to Berlin from New York. Matt went to college with Amra Brooks and is friends with art photog Ryan McGinley. He bought me many fancy bottled beers and we talked till 4am without going into the backroom.
Met with Jurgen Bruning at the gorgeous Bonjour Tristesse Delux Gallery on Karl Marx Allee in Fredrickshein. My Porno Adorno workshop will be held on Oct 21st at the Kant Kino in Charlotenberg from 8pm-10pm
***
Arrive in beautiful Graz Austria for the Steirischer Festival. Warmly greeted by the patrician festival director Veronica Kaup wearing an elegant Comme Des Garscon dress. The other staffers prepared a welcome brunch. Met Haiko, curator of the camp show, Anna his assistant. Rehearsed with Marianna, George and Tomas of Club Real, the wonderful Sabina, one of the main coordinators along with Johannes, Plan B´s Sophia, Dan and baby Ruby utterly delightful. Great to see Benny again, the architect who designed the Mountain Project in Berlin and his sexy girlfriend Hanna. Everything seems to be moving along well, and i´m engaged and excited about touring the small religious towns presenting St. Salicia Tate to the people. Can´t wait to try some of the Sturm, a fresh wine---the first of the year.
Went to opening party at the Helmut List Halle Event Hall and met our first set of fans----Eve and the Festival secretarial and administrative assistant klan. Today i am writing this very blog from the Festival headquarters in the former Palast of the Duke of Graz. How is that for hifallutin
Thursday, September 14, 2006
SOTADIC ZONE
So glad to be back home in the fatherland. The weather is gorgeous. Daniela of kollective Cheap moved to the hottest area in the city---Neukölln, and i am sharing his lovely flat on Flughaven Straße. From the balcony we can cruise the humpiest Turkish and Arab bubble butt boys. We like fishing from our high vantage point. Will be in Berlin for a week rehearsing our new piece, "Nobody Is Gonna Stop Me On My Path To Glory". Then its off to Graz, Austria where our performance will unfold like a gospel pitch tent revival, as we preach the highways and bi-ways of the little towns and villages outside of Graz. For this piece, we are engaging the local communities by working with the hot hunky regional firemen. Hope i get some robust puddy pie.
Invited to a fantastic dinner by the gracious first couple of avant garde art, Wilheim Hein and Annette Frick. Annette is a marvelous photographer, and was just awarded a grande prize for one of her latest projects. All of Europe is wrapped up in the house of Annette Frick. Attending the soiree was Tim Blue of Kollective Cheap and his bubbly visiting experimental musician pals, Peter and Patty Valsami, who just moved to LA from the Bay Area. Peter is a very uber masculine, dark and lovelz Greek active jazz prodigy, originally from Montreal. I also flirted with the gorgeous Türkische pop star Muhabbet, and actor-novelist Holger Siemann who just came out with the lush new tome, "Arbeit und Streben".
So glad to be back home in the fatherland. The weather is gorgeous. Daniela of kollective Cheap moved to the hottest area in the city---Neukölln, and i am sharing his lovely flat on Flughaven Straße. From the balcony we can cruise the humpiest Turkish and Arab bubble butt boys. We like fishing from our high vantage point. Will be in Berlin for a week rehearsing our new piece, "Nobody Is Gonna Stop Me On My Path To Glory". Then its off to Graz, Austria where our performance will unfold like a gospel pitch tent revival, as we preach the highways and bi-ways of the little towns and villages outside of Graz. For this piece, we are engaging the local communities by working with the hot hunky regional firemen. Hope i get some robust puddy pie.
Invited to a fantastic dinner by the gracious first couple of avant garde art, Wilheim Hein and Annette Frick. Annette is a marvelous photographer, and was just awarded a grande prize for one of her latest projects. All of Europe is wrapped up in the house of Annette Frick. Attending the soiree was Tim Blue of Kollective Cheap and his bubbly visiting experimental musician pals, Peter and Patty Valsami, who just moved to LA from the Bay Area. Peter is a very uber masculine, dark and lovelz Greek active jazz prodigy, originally from Montreal. I also flirted with the gorgeous Türkische pop star Muhabbet, and actor-novelist Holger Siemann who just came out with the lush new tome, "Arbeit und Streben".
Friday, September 08, 2006
LUDIVINE SAGNIER
I think i have the perfect title for my new book. Here it is folks: "Present Penicative" Let me know what you think?
I'm on my way back to Europe via Berlin first, then Vienna and Graz, Austria for the steirische herbst performance art festival. Put my snail mail on hold till i get back, which will be in November. Two lovely little surprises in my p.o. box. first, the new CD by gorgeous siren Abby Travis, appropriately titled "Glitter Mouth" Abby has the perfect voice, and is blessed with a trillion talents. She is a goddess with bewitching beauty that enchants all who are fortunate enough to gaze upon her. This song collektion is a must for the connessieur of immaculate songcraft. The titles tell it all: "Now Was" "Grace" "Blythe" "La Petite Mort" "So Far Away" I'll be DJ-ing in Austria, and can't wait to add this CD to my playlist.
Also hot and sexy F2M MC, Katastrophe sent me two of his CD packs with the albums "Fault, Lies, and Faultlines" and "Let's Fuck, Then Talk About My Problems"
Brilliantine!!!!
Katastrophe headlined at Homo-a-go-go recently, and is lovers with prolific poet and novelist Michelle Tea. I feel fortunate that i was there at the beginning of Mr. Katastrophe's sterling career. He first performed at Platinum Oasis in 2001 in the wee hours around the hazmat jacuzi with Dead Lee, and the second year of Platypus scored royally with his rap humpy trannyboy hip-hip group, End of the World. I love it when my children break free from their mother's womb and conquer the world with their talents.
***
O so their publicists won't be on my case, i hate publicists!
saw the films, The Covenant, which is like a male version of the witchy movie "The Craft" but starring some very fine, young boy whore ingenues with hefty racks and rumps. What studio exec is keeping these studkins? Jeffrey Katzenberg?
The Outkast movie Idlywild looks great, with fantastic costumes and attitude. Andre'Benjamin is one smoking ubangi lipped jubas---yummy, yummy. I just wished the storyline wasn't so conventional, its almost like they were afraid to really take it to the next level, and thats a shame because it would have been incredible if they hadn't chickened out. But thats the mainstream. They get a B+ for effort.
I really enjoyed the hunky Thai star of the martial arts film The Protector. This boy is one sizzling piece of sticky rice. He needed to be naked throughout the entire film. I usually don't like action pictures, but this one was so much fun and cheezy, especially the Black Lizard dragon lady queen who plays the villain of the picture. And what about her #1 henchman who looks like a combination John Cho/ Russell Wong. Yowza. i swear these young masculine Asian Men are replacing Latinos as le exotique sexual object d'jour.
Was housesitting in Silverlake on Maltman at Hector & Erics compound. The two gay lovers went on an Atlantis Gay Cruise. Last place on earth i would want to go on vacation, but their entertainment was provided by the legendary classical guitarist Charo!!!
It was nice to be treated to delicious din dins with British aristocrat Dom Johnson, lovesexy singer and artist Brian Grillo, designer Cory Allegory, and lawyers to the stars, MarLou DeLuna and Hal Marinas.
I think i have the perfect title for my new book. Here it is folks: "Present Penicative" Let me know what you think?
I'm on my way back to Europe via Berlin first, then Vienna and Graz, Austria for the steirische herbst performance art festival. Put my snail mail on hold till i get back, which will be in November. Two lovely little surprises in my p.o. box. first, the new CD by gorgeous siren Abby Travis, appropriately titled "Glitter Mouth" Abby has the perfect voice, and is blessed with a trillion talents. She is a goddess with bewitching beauty that enchants all who are fortunate enough to gaze upon her. This song collektion is a must for the connessieur of immaculate songcraft. The titles tell it all: "Now Was" "Grace" "Blythe" "La Petite Mort" "So Far Away" I'll be DJ-ing in Austria, and can't wait to add this CD to my playlist.
Also hot and sexy F2M MC, Katastrophe sent me two of his CD packs with the albums "Fault, Lies, and Faultlines" and "Let's Fuck, Then Talk About My Problems"
Brilliantine!!!!
Katastrophe headlined at Homo-a-go-go recently, and is lovers with prolific poet and novelist Michelle Tea. I feel fortunate that i was there at the beginning of Mr. Katastrophe's sterling career. He first performed at Platinum Oasis in 2001 in the wee hours around the hazmat jacuzi with Dead Lee, and the second year of Platypus scored royally with his rap humpy trannyboy hip-hip group, End of the World. I love it when my children break free from their mother's womb and conquer the world with their talents.
***
O so their publicists won't be on my case, i hate publicists!
saw the films, The Covenant, which is like a male version of the witchy movie "The Craft" but starring some very fine, young boy whore ingenues with hefty racks and rumps. What studio exec is keeping these studkins? Jeffrey Katzenberg?
The Outkast movie Idlywild looks great, with fantastic costumes and attitude. Andre'Benjamin is one smoking ubangi lipped jubas---yummy, yummy. I just wished the storyline wasn't so conventional, its almost like they were afraid to really take it to the next level, and thats a shame because it would have been incredible if they hadn't chickened out. But thats the mainstream. They get a B+ for effort.
I really enjoyed the hunky Thai star of the martial arts film The Protector. This boy is one sizzling piece of sticky rice. He needed to be naked throughout the entire film. I usually don't like action pictures, but this one was so much fun and cheezy, especially the Black Lizard dragon lady queen who plays the villain of the picture. And what about her #1 henchman who looks like a combination John Cho/ Russell Wong. Yowza. i swear these young masculine Asian Men are replacing Latinos as le exotique sexual object d'jour.
Was housesitting in Silverlake on Maltman at Hector & Erics compound. The two gay lovers went on an Atlantis Gay Cruise. Last place on earth i would want to go on vacation, but their entertainment was provided by the legendary classical guitarist Charo!!!
It was nice to be treated to delicious din dins with British aristocrat Dom Johnson, lovesexy singer and artist Brian Grillo, designer Cory Allegory, and lawyers to the stars, MarLou DeLuna and Hal Marinas.
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
BROS BEFORE HOS
A famous,big time literary agent is interested in the memoirs of little old lady me. Of course i have to write the proposal for what i want to write so he can shop it to publishers. But the ideal of it is very exciting. I've started an outline and the tone of my memoirs is going to be a little different from other books in the genre. So far I've come up with three working titles: Pearls Before Swine, Hancock Park or Naked on my Goad. Tell me what you think of those titles or if you have a suggestion for a new one. I'm hoping to be able to connect the dots with all the various people I've come in contact with over the years, the list is endless but expect to read about Larry Wachoswski, the famed Matrix director, Flea & Anthony of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Billy Idol, Angelina Jolie, Robin Given, Brad Pitt, Eddie Murphy and John-John Kennedy Jr.just to name a few
A famous,big time literary agent is interested in the memoirs of little old lady me. Of course i have to write the proposal for what i want to write so he can shop it to publishers. But the ideal of it is very exciting. I've started an outline and the tone of my memoirs is going to be a little different from other books in the genre. So far I've come up with three working titles: Pearls Before Swine, Hancock Park or Naked on my Goad. Tell me what you think of those titles or if you have a suggestion for a new one. I'm hoping to be able to connect the dots with all the various people I've come in contact with over the years, the list is endless but expect to read about Larry Wachoswski, the famed Matrix director, Flea & Anthony of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Billy Idol, Angelina Jolie, Robin Given, Brad Pitt, Eddie Murphy and John-John Kennedy Jr.just to name a few
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
THERE BEFORE THE GRACE OF GOD GO I . . .
Sad to relay the death of Brandy Dalton of Drance fame. Poor Brandy had been on death's doorknob for many years. Brandy created the wonderful techno soundscape for my Saint Salicia Tate performance and also the music for the techno rock opera "Epiphany". Brandy also collaborated with Ron Athey and the late Robert Woods on music for many of Daddy Athey's celebrated performance pieces. I also loved the work Brandy did with the lovely and vivacious Ms. Tammie Tell Me True, an Orange County vixen with a heart and voice of spun gold. I'll always remember Ms. Tam still singing soaking wet after jumping into a pool at one performance. Brandy also did the score for many top blue movies and indie pics.
I'll always be jealous of Brandy's talent, and good natured spirit, and his ability to always attract the most yummy, fresh and sexually vibrant boys from the suburbs who were always so loyal to him. I can't remember which LA suburb Brandy was originally from, either La Mirada, Lakewood, Cerritos . . .
Robert Woods, Brandy's Drance partner died about a decade ago. Robert had a lover who also died, who was very much into cholos, and was cruising a hot vato in silverlake one night. The gangbanger called him out as a fucking fag and spit a big lugi on the ground next to him. Well Robert's lover got on his hands and knees and licked that lugi up from the ground, slurping it with relish. Well that won over the smoking kabron, and he got to suck the rust off that juicy thug's willis.
***
Gideon Ponte, a gorgeous English boy that i use to hang with here in LA in the mid-late 80s is now a top production designer for movies like Nacho Libre and The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys. When i knew him he was a fruit fly, a straight boy who hangs with fags. I sure had a major crush on him in the day.
Sad to relay the death of Brandy Dalton of Drance fame. Poor Brandy had been on death's doorknob for many years. Brandy created the wonderful techno soundscape for my Saint Salicia Tate performance and also the music for the techno rock opera "Epiphany". Brandy also collaborated with Ron Athey and the late Robert Woods on music for many of Daddy Athey's celebrated performance pieces. I also loved the work Brandy did with the lovely and vivacious Ms. Tammie Tell Me True, an Orange County vixen with a heart and voice of spun gold. I'll always remember Ms. Tam still singing soaking wet after jumping into a pool at one performance. Brandy also did the score for many top blue movies and indie pics.
I'll always be jealous of Brandy's talent, and good natured spirit, and his ability to always attract the most yummy, fresh and sexually vibrant boys from the suburbs who were always so loyal to him. I can't remember which LA suburb Brandy was originally from, either La Mirada, Lakewood, Cerritos . . .
Robert Woods, Brandy's Drance partner died about a decade ago. Robert had a lover who also died, who was very much into cholos, and was cruising a hot vato in silverlake one night. The gangbanger called him out as a fucking fag and spit a big lugi on the ground next to him. Well Robert's lover got on his hands and knees and licked that lugi up from the ground, slurping it with relish. Well that won over the smoking kabron, and he got to suck the rust off that juicy thug's willis.
***
Gideon Ponte, a gorgeous English boy that i use to hang with here in LA in the mid-late 80s is now a top production designer for movies like Nacho Libre and The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys. When i knew him he was a fruit fly, a straight boy who hangs with fags. I sure had a major crush on him in the day.
Monday, August 14, 2006
ESSAYS DE LA MUJER
Scorkel one for Quincenera directors, Granny Richard Glatzer and his slimy limey lover Washerwoman Westmoreland. Of course you can't go wrong with Echo Parkland as the backdrop of their film, and superlative performances by veterano Chalo Gonzales as the Great Uncle, juicycled fat tittied Jesse Garcia as one of the humpiest cholos i've ever wanted to chug-a-lug, and the luminous Emily Rios. Just put the camera in front of these three, and you'll have an instant hot flick.
Maybe one day someone will do a movie about the age old Silverlake/Echo Park phenomena of older white men with latino lovers who support their boyfriends entire extended clan for decades. I'm not giving you excrement here. These relationships exist and they usually start when the younger lover is in his teens. I know of one couple where the white man is now in his 70s and his beau is mid 40's, married with kids and they all live together in the same house. Does he and the mamacita trade off for conjugal Morman visitations, eh?
Scorkel one for Quincenera directors, Granny Richard Glatzer and his slimy limey lover Washerwoman Westmoreland. Of course you can't go wrong with Echo Parkland as the backdrop of their film, and superlative performances by veterano Chalo Gonzales as the Great Uncle, juicycled fat tittied Jesse Garcia as one of the humpiest cholos i've ever wanted to chug-a-lug, and the luminous Emily Rios. Just put the camera in front of these three, and you'll have an instant hot flick.
Maybe one day someone will do a movie about the age old Silverlake/Echo Park phenomena of older white men with latino lovers who support their boyfriends entire extended clan for decades. I'm not giving you excrement here. These relationships exist and they usually start when the younger lover is in his teens. I know of one couple where the white man is now in his 70s and his beau is mid 40's, married with kids and they all live together in the same house. Does he and the mamacita trade off for conjugal Morman visitations, eh?
Sunday, August 13, 2006
I DON'T WANT M-TV
Before i left for Homo A-Go-Go in Olympia my intern forwarded me this request from some new Gay cable TV network called Logo that is connected to M-TV. I don't own a TV, an i-pod,a DVD /MVP player, a walkman, a cellphone,a palm pilot, a green or blackberry. I hate all those crappy gadgets and whatnots that you see people glued to, and i'm certainly not interested in being a part of television and getting exposure from television. Can i make that any more clear people.
Forwarded Message:
Subj: Vaginal davis to host and episode of logo's music show: New Now Next
Date: 7/25/06 11:08:19 AM Pacific Daylight Time
From: sasha.anthome
To: gleebrevard
Sent from the Internet (Details) Hey-I am writing you because I, along with a small crew, am coming to Homoagogo to shoot some segments for Logo's music show NewNow Next..We are interested in coming there specifically to film portions for the show
that include interviews with some of the artists performing as well as interviews with willing attendees. AND...we would love to interview Vaginal Davis, as she has been an icon in the punk rock scene. Below you will find a short description of the show. This event is very exciting to us as it captures the essence of the
show and we believe we can offer her some great national exposure
as well as the opportunity to reach a broad queer audience.
Each episode is framed by a specific artist's interview... so in
essence she would have an entire episode of the show devoted to her
interview. We'd really love to interview Vaginal Davis while we are up
there. If she is interested in being a part of the show, please
contact myself or Courtney Powell.
Thanks,
Sasha Anthome, Producer
Courtney Powell, Producer
Before i left for Homo A-Go-Go in Olympia my intern forwarded me this request from some new Gay cable TV network called Logo that is connected to M-TV. I don't own a TV, an i-pod,a DVD /MVP player, a walkman, a cellphone,a palm pilot, a green or blackberry. I hate all those crappy gadgets and whatnots that you see people glued to, and i'm certainly not interested in being a part of television and getting exposure from television. Can i make that any more clear people.
Forwarded Message:
Subj: Vaginal davis to host and episode of logo's music show: New Now Next
Date: 7/25/06 11:08:19 AM Pacific Daylight Time
From: sasha.anthome
To: gleebrevard
Sent from the Internet (Details) Hey-I am writing you because I, along with a small crew, am coming to Homoagogo to shoot some segments for Logo's music show NewNow Next..We are interested in coming there specifically to film portions for the show
that include interviews with some of the artists performing as well as interviews with willing attendees. AND...we would love to interview Vaginal Davis, as she has been an icon in the punk rock scene. Below you will find a short description of the show. This event is very exciting to us as it captures the essence of the
show and we believe we can offer her some great national exposure
as well as the opportunity to reach a broad queer audience.
Each episode is framed by a specific artist's interview... so in
essence she would have an entire episode of the show devoted to her
interview. We'd really love to interview Vaginal Davis while we are up
there. If she is interested in being a part of the show, please
contact myself or Courtney Powell.
Thanks,
Sasha Anthome, Producer
Courtney Powell, Producer
OF THEE I DWINK
I always burn a bridge when it comes to being courted by wealthy men who can take me out of the poverty palace. A few years ago while I was in England I had a daliance with Ivor Wimborne, the Viscount of St. Ledgers. This wasn’t my first fling with a Viscount. I diddled back in the early 80s with Sir William Waldron, who owned the Melrose Avenue vintage clothing store Just William. William Waldron was one of the few British aristocrats who still had great wealth. He even owned the Lloyd Wright house in Los Feliz, and when he was bored with it sold it to David Lynch and his then wife Isabella Rossellini. William wound up marrying some black girl who took him for a bundle. Of course I warned him that she was a golddigger, but he didn’t listen and resented me for it. He is now living alone and a little loco in the mountains of Northern California with hideously overgrown finger and toe nails. See what lots of money does to people, its more of a hinderance then a help.
Now get this---Sir Wimborne, the man I let slip through my fingerettes more recently is engaged to the legendary dope addict, and party negress supreme, Grace Jones. Well if anyone deserves to be a Viscountess its Miss Grace.
***
Director Andre’ Te’chine’ emailed me a little upset that I hadn’t reviewed his new film, Le Temps qui Changent on my blog. I saw the movie in Europe, and wasn’t aware that it is now being screened in America. This movie stars powerhouses Catherine Deneuve and Gerard Dipardieu who are tantalizing. Its so nice watching mature talents gobble the screen. Set in exotic Tangiers, the film also features the remarkable Arab actress Lubna Azabal from the Palastinian film Paradise Now. If you don’t see this movie, I will kill you.
I always burn a bridge when it comes to being courted by wealthy men who can take me out of the poverty palace. A few years ago while I was in England I had a daliance with Ivor Wimborne, the Viscount of St. Ledgers. This wasn’t my first fling with a Viscount. I diddled back in the early 80s with Sir William Waldron, who owned the Melrose Avenue vintage clothing store Just William. William Waldron was one of the few British aristocrats who still had great wealth. He even owned the Lloyd Wright house in Los Feliz, and when he was bored with it sold it to David Lynch and his then wife Isabella Rossellini. William wound up marrying some black girl who took him for a bundle. Of course I warned him that she was a golddigger, but he didn’t listen and resented me for it. He is now living alone and a little loco in the mountains of Northern California with hideously overgrown finger and toe nails. See what lots of money does to people, its more of a hinderance then a help.
Now get this---Sir Wimborne, the man I let slip through my fingerettes more recently is engaged to the legendary dope addict, and party negress supreme, Grace Jones. Well if anyone deserves to be a Viscountess its Miss Grace.
***
Director Andre’ Te’chine’ emailed me a little upset that I hadn’t reviewed his new film, Le Temps qui Changent on my blog. I saw the movie in Europe, and wasn’t aware that it is now being screened in America. This movie stars powerhouses Catherine Deneuve and Gerard Dipardieu who are tantalizing. Its so nice watching mature talents gobble the screen. Set in exotic Tangiers, the film also features the remarkable Arab actress Lubna Azabal from the Palastinian film Paradise Now. If you don’t see this movie, I will kill you.
Monday, August 07, 2006
PACIFIC NORTHWESTICA MAJESTICA
Showcased a mini presentation of my underground film ouvre---"One Man Ladies"with a Glennda Orgasm nee Belverio "That Fertile Feeling","The Three Faces of Women" trilogy section "Dr Chris Teen" with Chris "Teen"Martin and Bruce LaBruce, wowing the youthful crowd, many who've only read of my exploits via their academic studies. Hosted the rock portion of Homo-A-Go-Go ala Club Sucker days of wine and gnosis. Nicely attended events, and a diverse popu of kiddies make Homo-A-Go-Go a utopian paradisio in the lovely town of Olympia Washington. Held at the gorgeou Capital Theatre, and well organized by an all-volunteer canibi staff of juicebods and thrombones----delicious each and every one of them.
John Cameron Manheim Steamroller Patrik Swayze Mitchell of Hedvig and the Angry Inch fame, previewed his new Canne Film Festival hit, "Shortbus" which is a lovely exploration of the polymorphously perverse denizens of a hallowed sexxx salon hosted by the geniustrata Justin Bond, who makes for a swelleganza screen presencia. Very attractive cast abounding in the glow of coitek carnel knowledging. Standouts being a nicely peniled young man with longish hair and milky white thrush body, his real life beau, who looks like a young version of Homocore Chicago's Mark "Ears" Freitas and a hard faced Soon Yi Previn look-a-like. A great score included a song by Canada's Hidden Cammeras.
Rode from the aeroport to my comfy Phoenix Inn digs with Mr. Mitchell, who was a pleasant and congenial companion. We're both of the same generation, and Madame Mitchell also DJ'd between band sets, and was an overall charming sprite. One of these days I'd love to take him up on the offer of a visit to his Puerto Rican retreat that he had built from scratch on the island of large uncut endowmentas.
Friday performance highlights included the Czarina of burlesque and intermedia choreography, NYC's Julie Atlas Muz, who never fails to cause gasps of delight, the expert musicianship of Englands King Cheetah, the boyganza of Mikeala's Fiend, chrystaline intity Assacre, the first lady of hip-hip Jenro, the bullet nipples and flat scratch stomachs of The Dead Betties, and the saviours of rock n roll, The Gossip featuring the divine and sexyline Beth of Hollers End. The Gossip should have the acclaim that is bestowed upon the overrated White Stripes. As a band The Gossip are explosive channelers of the best blues traditions, lurking from the muddy swamp waters. The Lady Miss Beth's voice is enchanting, with a berry tone that pays tribute to legendinas Ma Rainey and Bessie Smith, and a stage presence that brings to mind the young Alice Bag. Now I'm believing in rock n roll again.
The last night of the festival featured standout performances by poet Michelle Tea who gave me a copy of her new book, Rose of No Man's Land, which i can't wait to read, sweet country songstress Jessica Rose, Montreal's dazzling Lesbians on X who cleverly take the music of womyn's muzek pioneers Holly Near, Chris Williamson and Trent Furor and give it a modern electro flourish, Will Schwartz of Imperial Teen fame and his new dance music project Hey Willpower that caused a major sensation. Will is looking very teen spirit with his new lusty, muscular, bubblebutt power bitch body, humpy blatino rap star Dead Lee forced fed me his giant willis from the stage, and i eagerly serviced him. who could resist all that fine speciman of a man? Legend Bob Mould also performed and DJ-d the closing party which ended early due to so many after soirees, the biggest one being the train tracks Rim Party that siphon off much of the crowd. In fact my morning ride to the airport flaked on me, i guess after a night of non-stop analingus, one can't be expected to chauffer loud unruly diva queens. After waiting for 30 minutes i just called a taxi and had a surreal moment with the driver and his buddy, two of the fugliest middle aged men i've ever seen in my life. They were spiraling tweekers who talked non-stop, but couldn't drive very fast, and i almost missed my flight because of them. Oh welpsis. I still had a glorious time hanging out with so many wonderous people including major talent and hotticle Donna Dresch of Team Dresch who i love dearly, and i want to give thanks, love and kissy kisses to Miss Tara of Sex Workers, Ed and all the wonderful children of Homo A-Go-Go Directive, who attended to all my lady needs and desires.
Showcased a mini presentation of my underground film ouvre---"One Man Ladies"with a Glennda Orgasm nee Belverio "That Fertile Feeling","The Three Faces of Women" trilogy section "Dr Chris Teen" with Chris "Teen"Martin and Bruce LaBruce, wowing the youthful crowd, many who've only read of my exploits via their academic studies. Hosted the rock portion of Homo-A-Go-Go ala Club Sucker days of wine and gnosis. Nicely attended events, and a diverse popu of kiddies make Homo-A-Go-Go a utopian paradisio in the lovely town of Olympia Washington. Held at the gorgeou Capital Theatre, and well organized by an all-volunteer canibi staff of juicebods and thrombones----delicious each and every one of them.
John Cameron Manheim Steamroller Patrik Swayze Mitchell of Hedvig and the Angry Inch fame, previewed his new Canne Film Festival hit, "Shortbus" which is a lovely exploration of the polymorphously perverse denizens of a hallowed sexxx salon hosted by the geniustrata Justin Bond, who makes for a swelleganza screen presencia. Very attractive cast abounding in the glow of coitek carnel knowledging. Standouts being a nicely peniled young man with longish hair and milky white thrush body, his real life beau, who looks like a young version of Homocore Chicago's Mark "Ears" Freitas and a hard faced Soon Yi Previn look-a-like. A great score included a song by Canada's Hidden Cammeras.
Rode from the aeroport to my comfy Phoenix Inn digs with Mr. Mitchell, who was a pleasant and congenial companion. We're both of the same generation, and Madame Mitchell also DJ'd between band sets, and was an overall charming sprite. One of these days I'd love to take him up on the offer of a visit to his Puerto Rican retreat that he had built from scratch on the island of large uncut endowmentas.
Friday performance highlights included the Czarina of burlesque and intermedia choreography, NYC's Julie Atlas Muz, who never fails to cause gasps of delight, the expert musicianship of Englands King Cheetah, the boyganza of Mikeala's Fiend, chrystaline intity Assacre, the first lady of hip-hip Jenro, the bullet nipples and flat scratch stomachs of The Dead Betties, and the saviours of rock n roll, The Gossip featuring the divine and sexyline Beth of Hollers End. The Gossip should have the acclaim that is bestowed upon the overrated White Stripes. As a band The Gossip are explosive channelers of the best blues traditions, lurking from the muddy swamp waters. The Lady Miss Beth's voice is enchanting, with a berry tone that pays tribute to legendinas Ma Rainey and Bessie Smith, and a stage presence that brings to mind the young Alice Bag. Now I'm believing in rock n roll again.
The last night of the festival featured standout performances by poet Michelle Tea who gave me a copy of her new book, Rose of No Man's Land, which i can't wait to read, sweet country songstress Jessica Rose, Montreal's dazzling Lesbians on X who cleverly take the music of womyn's muzek pioneers Holly Near, Chris Williamson and Trent Furor and give it a modern electro flourish, Will Schwartz of Imperial Teen fame and his new dance music project Hey Willpower that caused a major sensation. Will is looking very teen spirit with his new lusty, muscular, bubblebutt power bitch body, humpy blatino rap star Dead Lee forced fed me his giant willis from the stage, and i eagerly serviced him. who could resist all that fine speciman of a man? Legend Bob Mould also performed and DJ-d the closing party which ended early due to so many after soirees, the biggest one being the train tracks Rim Party that siphon off much of the crowd. In fact my morning ride to the airport flaked on me, i guess after a night of non-stop analingus, one can't be expected to chauffer loud unruly diva queens. After waiting for 30 minutes i just called a taxi and had a surreal moment with the driver and his buddy, two of the fugliest middle aged men i've ever seen in my life. They were spiraling tweekers who talked non-stop, but couldn't drive very fast, and i almost missed my flight because of them. Oh welpsis. I still had a glorious time hanging out with so many wonderous people including major talent and hotticle Donna Dresch of Team Dresch who i love dearly, and i want to give thanks, love and kissy kisses to Miss Tara of Sex Workers, Ed and all the wonderful children of Homo A-Go-Go Directive, who attended to all my lady needs and desires.
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
SYNARCHIST ENEMIAS
I hate when publicists bug me about when I'm going to write about their movies. I see a lot of movies, so sometimes it takes me a while---OK? Well to be honest I had forgotten about Shadowboxer, starring Tom Cruises #2 dinge dream,Cuba Gooding Jr. and the amazing Helen Mirren who I’ve loved since she was in Roman Polanski’s brilliant screen version of MacBeth. This nutters film seems to be influenced by David Cronenberg’s A History of Violence. Its not as good as that movie, but its not a bad film either. I loved the May/Octoberfest sex scenes between Mirren and fat tittied, bubble butt Gooding Jr and the Feb/August fornicating of Gordon-Leavitt and comedienne Mo’nique, plus that full condom frontal of Stephen Dorff.
The Francoise Ozon film Time to Leave features the stunning Melvil Poupoud (who was so underused in the American film Le Divorce) and the ageless wonder that is acting royal Jeanne Moreau. The best scene is when Mr. Poupoud and his rather plithy member, mount and plow his young androgynous lover----yummy.
I hate when publicists bug me about when I'm going to write about their movies. I see a lot of movies, so sometimes it takes me a while---OK? Well to be honest I had forgotten about Shadowboxer, starring Tom Cruises #2 dinge dream,Cuba Gooding Jr. and the amazing Helen Mirren who I’ve loved since she was in Roman Polanski’s brilliant screen version of MacBeth. This nutters film seems to be influenced by David Cronenberg’s A History of Violence. Its not as good as that movie, but its not a bad film either. I loved the May/Octoberfest sex scenes between Mirren and fat tittied, bubble butt Gooding Jr and the Feb/August fornicating of Gordon-Leavitt and comedienne Mo’nique, plus that full condom frontal of Stephen Dorff.
The Francoise Ozon film Time to Leave features the stunning Melvil Poupoud (who was so underused in the American film Le Divorce) and the ageless wonder that is acting royal Jeanne Moreau. The best scene is when Mr. Poupoud and his rather plithy member, mount and plow his young androgynous lover----yummy.
Sunday, July 30, 2006
MENDACITY IN THE AIR
One of my oldest and dearest friends, and sister of the clothe Glenn Belverio has written a dazzling new tome, Confessions From the Velvet Ropes about New York’s top doorman Thomas Onorato, who use to do the door at Squeezebox at Don Hill’s a place that I performed at with frequency during the 90s. The book is rising on the New York Times best seller list, and is a wonderful summertime read. Glenn Belverio is a geniustrata writer and wit, and all his charms are reflected in this sensational book. All the tired club owners of Los Angeles need to heed what is written in Confessions. Especially these spurious types like Sam Nazarian with his partner Brett Bolthouse, that think just because they have oodles of money that makes them arbiters of taste and style. Well it doesn’t. If I read another article about this Nazarian character where it says he’s 31 years old, I’m good to vomit. The man doesn’t look a day over 50. And with the criteria of these tacky new clubs that cater to this bottle service crap of people paying gabs of money for expensive alcohol---the ultimate of tired. I guess one has to thank the ostentatiousness of the rap and hip hop scene for ushering that into play. True hip clubs as Belverio makes clear, and any one who has been to my events knows, involves selecting patrons based on their personal style, overall originality, quirky beauty, alluring ugliness, or interesting work credentials.
So go to Amazon.com and order your copy of Glenn’s book before I finish this sentence.
One of my oldest and dearest friends, and sister of the clothe Glenn Belverio has written a dazzling new tome, Confessions From the Velvet Ropes about New York’s top doorman Thomas Onorato, who use to do the door at Squeezebox at Don Hill’s a place that I performed at with frequency during the 90s. The book is rising on the New York Times best seller list, and is a wonderful summertime read. Glenn Belverio is a geniustrata writer and wit, and all his charms are reflected in this sensational book. All the tired club owners of Los Angeles need to heed what is written in Confessions. Especially these spurious types like Sam Nazarian with his partner Brett Bolthouse, that think just because they have oodles of money that makes them arbiters of taste and style. Well it doesn’t. If I read another article about this Nazarian character where it says he’s 31 years old, I’m good to vomit. The man doesn’t look a day over 50. And with the criteria of these tacky new clubs that cater to this bottle service crap of people paying gabs of money for expensive alcohol---the ultimate of tired. I guess one has to thank the ostentatiousness of the rap and hip hop scene for ushering that into play. True hip clubs as Belverio makes clear, and any one who has been to my events knows, involves selecting patrons based on their personal style, overall originality, quirky beauty, alluring ugliness, or interesting work credentials.
So go to Amazon.com and order your copy of Glenn’s book before I finish this sentence.
Saturday, July 29, 2006
CHARLOTTE RAMPLING IS ON THE LINE
Sung Yi Previn better watch out or she is going to get replaced by a much younger girl, namely Scarlette Johanssen. The Woodster as in Woody Allen is so in love with the buxom Miss Scarlette that I wouldn’t be surprised if he made the star of his new movie Scoop, his regular leading lady. Its so obvious when watching the movie that he is beyond smitten kitten. I love Mr. Allen, but he is one neurotica horndoggedy old koot if ever I saw one, and I’m really feeling for Miss Mia Farrow and her 114 Rosemarried babies.
***
The Divine Charlotte Rampling in the movie Heading South gets her lady gnut with juicy jubas jubilee Menothy Cesar. I gather the French director Laurent Cantet is a major DINGE QUEEN with all the tight bodied, bubble butted and big dicked Mandingos he fills the screen with----delicious.
***
When it comes to one of the best racks in Hollywood, I’m torn between Fantastic Four male ingenue Chris Evans and Jesse Metcalfe who gets to strut his bountiful busoms in John Tucker Must Die. I’m begging you Jesse to please do something with those overly plucked eyebrows. They are such a distraction from your chesty morgan spurlock.
***
My lady guity pleasure: Clerks II. Thank god I get invited to free screenings and I don’t have to pay for movies, but this item from that rolly polly portly pepperpot Kevin Smith is hilarious. Especially the porch monkey bit. Poor pretty Rosario Dawson who has to kiss the hideous lead actor, and I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if Mr. Smith wasn’t sucking on the sweet fat titties and munching out the hairless bunghole of super lovesexy Jason Mewes who plays Jay to his Silent Bob. Just a thought.
***
The Lady in the Water should have stayed there, or gotten advice from The Lady in the Lake. See what happens when one gets a piddling of success in Hollywoodland. They lose their natural borne mind.
***
One of my dear friends Meesh is working on the Tyra Banks America’s Top Model Show and she is on strike. Here is some info so you can support their union efforts:
Hi Guys,
For those of you who don't know, the entire writing staff at America's Next Top Model is on strike (myself included). It is the usual Norma Rae scenario....we want health insurance and other protections offered by being part of the writers guild. It's been a crazy whirlwind the last couple of weeks, and I can fill you in more later if you are interested. We started picketing on Friday, and will continut starting tomorrow. If anyone is interested in coming to hang out and add bodies to our demonstration, let me know and I will give you details. If you can't come, but will be on the west side, at least drive by and give us a honk. We are on the corner of Sepulveda and Santa Monica. Wish us luck!
Below are some info links, if you are interested.
http://wga.org/subpage_newsevents.aspx?id=1993
This is where the WGA is posting clips on the main website
http://www.realityunited.org/
This is the recently launched website for the reality organizing
campaign - we are tracking clips there as well.
Sung Yi Previn better watch out or she is going to get replaced by a much younger girl, namely Scarlette Johanssen. The Woodster as in Woody Allen is so in love with the buxom Miss Scarlette that I wouldn’t be surprised if he made the star of his new movie Scoop, his regular leading lady. Its so obvious when watching the movie that he is beyond smitten kitten. I love Mr. Allen, but he is one neurotica horndoggedy old koot if ever I saw one, and I’m really feeling for Miss Mia Farrow and her 114 Rosemarried babies.
***
The Divine Charlotte Rampling in the movie Heading South gets her lady gnut with juicy jubas jubilee Menothy Cesar. I gather the French director Laurent Cantet is a major DINGE QUEEN with all the tight bodied, bubble butted and big dicked Mandingos he fills the screen with----delicious.
***
When it comes to one of the best racks in Hollywood, I’m torn between Fantastic Four male ingenue Chris Evans and Jesse Metcalfe who gets to strut his bountiful busoms in John Tucker Must Die. I’m begging you Jesse to please do something with those overly plucked eyebrows. They are such a distraction from your chesty morgan spurlock.
***
My lady guity pleasure: Clerks II. Thank god I get invited to free screenings and I don’t have to pay for movies, but this item from that rolly polly portly pepperpot Kevin Smith is hilarious. Especially the porch monkey bit. Poor pretty Rosario Dawson who has to kiss the hideous lead actor, and I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if Mr. Smith wasn’t sucking on the sweet fat titties and munching out the hairless bunghole of super lovesexy Jason Mewes who plays Jay to his Silent Bob. Just a thought.
***
The Lady in the Water should have stayed there, or gotten advice from The Lady in the Lake. See what happens when one gets a piddling of success in Hollywoodland. They lose their natural borne mind.
***
One of my dear friends Meesh is working on the Tyra Banks America’s Top Model Show and she is on strike. Here is some info so you can support their union efforts:
Hi Guys,
For those of you who don't know, the entire writing staff at America's Next Top Model is on strike (myself included). It is the usual Norma Rae scenario....we want health insurance and other protections offered by being part of the writers guild. It's been a crazy whirlwind the last couple of weeks, and I can fill you in more later if you are interested. We started picketing on Friday, and will continut starting tomorrow. If anyone is interested in coming to hang out and add bodies to our demonstration, let me know and I will give you details. If you can't come, but will be on the west side, at least drive by and give us a honk. We are on the corner of Sepulveda and Santa Monica. Wish us luck!
Below are some info links, if you are interested.
http://wga.org/subpage_newsevents.aspx?id=1993
This is where the WGA is posting clips on the main website
http://www.realityunited.org/
This is the recently launched website for the reality organizing
campaign - we are tracking clips there as well.
CHARLOTTE RAMPLING IS ON THE LINE
Sung Yi Previn better watch out or she is going to get replaced by a much younger girl, namely Scarlette Johanssen. The Woodster as in Woody Allen is so in love with the buxom Miss Scarlette that I wouldn’t be surprised if he made the star of his new movie Scoop, his regular leading lady. Its so obvious when watching the movie that he is beyond smitten kitten. I love Mr. Allen, but he is one neurotica horndoggedy old koot if ever I saw one, and I’m really feeling for Miss Mia Farrow and her 114 Rosemarried babies.
***
The Divine Charlotte Rampling in the movie Heading South gets her lady gnut with juicy jubas jubilee Menothy Cesar. I gather the French director Laurent Cantet is a major DINGE QUEEN with all the tight bodied, bubble butted and big dicked Mandingos he fills the screen with----delicious.
***
When it comes to one of the best racks in Hollywood, I’m torn between Fantastic Four male ingenue Chris Evans and Jesse Metcalfe who gets to strut his bountiful busoms in John Tucker Must Die. I’m begging you Jesse to please do something with those overly plucked eyebrows. They are such a distraction from your chesty morganspurlock.
***
My lady guity pleasure: Clerks II. Thank god I get invited to free screenings and I don’t have to pay for movies, but this item from that rolly polly portly pepperpot Kevin Smith is hilariouk. (new word) Especially the porch monkey bit, and the two ugly leads, and poor pretty Rosario Dawson who has to kiss one of them. For gods sakes.
I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if Mr. Smith wasn’t sucking on the sweet fat titties, and munching out the hairless bunghole of super lovesexy Jason Mewes who plays Jay to his Silent Bob. Just a thought.
***
The Lady in the Water should have stayed there, or gotten advice from The Lady in the Lake. See what happens when one gets a piddling of success in Hollywoodland. They lose their natural borne mind.
***
One of my dear friends Meesh is working on the Tyra Banks America’s Top Model Show and she is on strike. Here is some info so you can support their union efforts:
Hi Guys,
For those of you who don't know, the entire writing staff at America's Next Top Model is on strike (myself included). It is the usual Norma Rae scenario....we want health insurance and other protections offered by being part of the writers guild. It's been a crazy whirlwind the last couple of weeks, and I can fill you in more later if you are interested. We started picketing on Friday, and will continut starting tomorrow. If anyone is interested in coming to hang out and add bodies to our demonstration, let me know and I will give you details. If you can't come, but will be on the west side, at least drive by and give us a honk. We are on the corner of Sepulveda and Santa Monica. Wish us luck!
Below are some info links, if you are interested.
http://wga.org/subpage_newsevents.aspx?id=1993
This is where the WGA is posting clips on the main website
http://www.realityunited.org/
This is the recently launched website for the reality organizing
campaign - we are tracking clips there as well.
Sung Yi Previn better watch out or she is going to get replaced by a much younger girl, namely Scarlette Johanssen. The Woodster as in Woody Allen is so in love with the buxom Miss Scarlette that I wouldn’t be surprised if he made the star of his new movie Scoop, his regular leading lady. Its so obvious when watching the movie that he is beyond smitten kitten. I love Mr. Allen, but he is one neurotica horndoggedy old koot if ever I saw one, and I’m really feeling for Miss Mia Farrow and her 114 Rosemarried babies.
***
The Divine Charlotte Rampling in the movie Heading South gets her lady gnut with juicy jubas jubilee Menothy Cesar. I gather the French director Laurent Cantet is a major DINGE QUEEN with all the tight bodied, bubble butted and big dicked Mandingos he fills the screen with----delicious.
***
When it comes to one of the best racks in Hollywood, I’m torn between Fantastic Four male ingenue Chris Evans and Jesse Metcalfe who gets to strut his bountiful busoms in John Tucker Must Die. I’m begging you Jesse to please do something with those overly plucked eyebrows. They are such a distraction from your chesty morganspurlock.
***
My lady guity pleasure: Clerks II. Thank god I get invited to free screenings and I don’t have to pay for movies, but this item from that rolly polly portly pepperpot Kevin Smith is hilariouk. (new word) Especially the porch monkey bit, and the two ugly leads, and poor pretty Rosario Dawson who has to kiss one of them. For gods sakes.
I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if Mr. Smith wasn’t sucking on the sweet fat titties, and munching out the hairless bunghole of super lovesexy Jason Mewes who plays Jay to his Silent Bob. Just a thought.
***
The Lady in the Water should have stayed there, or gotten advice from The Lady in the Lake. See what happens when one gets a piddling of success in Hollywoodland. They lose their natural borne mind.
***
One of my dear friends Meesh is working on the Tyra Banks America’s Top Model Show and she is on strike. Here is some info so you can support their union efforts:
Hi Guys,
For those of you who don't know, the entire writing staff at America's Next Top Model is on strike (myself included). It is the usual Norma Rae scenario....we want health insurance and other protections offered by being part of the writers guild. It's been a crazy whirlwind the last couple of weeks, and I can fill you in more later if you are interested. We started picketing on Friday, and will continut starting tomorrow. If anyone is interested in coming to hang out and add bodies to our demonstration, let me know and I will give you details. If you can't come, but will be on the west side, at least drive by and give us a honk. We are on the corner of Sepulveda and Santa Monica. Wish us luck!
Below are some info links, if you are interested.
http://wga.org/subpage_newsevents.aspx?id=1993
This is where the WGA is posting clips on the main website
http://www.realityunited.org/
This is the recently launched website for the reality organizing
campaign - we are tracking clips there as well.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
LE TEMPS QUE RESTE
One of the great things about having gone to a fancy Swiss finishing school (Le Rosey)on scholarship as a child is my connection to European aristocrats and royals. Its come in handy over the years for both me, and some of my friends who found themselves in boiling hot water abroad because of some drug related offense or whathaveyou. Luckily i was able to make one phone call and relieve the situation. Being that i was born into staunch poverty, its amazing that i can weild an arsenol when need be.
Now that I'm more or lessed based in Europe, i can't wait to party with Crown Prince Philip of Sweden aka Duke of Varmland. He is a major Ms. Gorgeous piece of Scandanavian butt cloister, and he adores me and is very flirtatious with that cruel club of his. When I'm in Graz, Austria i hope to spend time with that sultry thrombone Amedeo of Austria whose father Archduke Lorenz of Austria-Este use to be hot when he was young(thats when i first met him), but is now a bit on the trollish side.
I'd better be careful not to let lovesexy Gonzalo Miro catch me with Edwardo Cruz, the juicy pop star brother of Penelope Cruz. The two men hate each other because of an incident between me and Eugenia the Duchess of Montoro, whose mother is the Duchess of Alba who i use to hang with until she got into a knockout lesbiana sluggo with Paula Marzotto of the famed Italian fashion dynasty, and Paula's daughter Princess Beatrice Orromeo is now fooling around with studkin bullfighter Francisco Rivera who has a pretty little daughter named Cayetona whose mother is Eugenia----its all so complicated and confusing that i have trouble keeping track of it all, so i don't expect you to be able to. And did i mention that my good pal Lady Didi(Diana) Judd whose father is Visconte something or other is related to Prince Harry's girlfriend Chelsy Davy----let me end all this here and now.
I'm not known as a modern day Elsa Maxwell for nothing kids.
One of the great things about having gone to a fancy Swiss finishing school (Le Rosey)on scholarship as a child is my connection to European aristocrats and royals. Its come in handy over the years for both me, and some of my friends who found themselves in boiling hot water abroad because of some drug related offense or whathaveyou. Luckily i was able to make one phone call and relieve the situation. Being that i was born into staunch poverty, its amazing that i can weild an arsenol when need be.
Now that I'm more or lessed based in Europe, i can't wait to party with Crown Prince Philip of Sweden aka Duke of Varmland. He is a major Ms. Gorgeous piece of Scandanavian butt cloister, and he adores me and is very flirtatious with that cruel club of his. When I'm in Graz, Austria i hope to spend time with that sultry thrombone Amedeo of Austria whose father Archduke Lorenz of Austria-Este use to be hot when he was young(thats when i first met him), but is now a bit on the trollish side.
I'd better be careful not to let lovesexy Gonzalo Miro catch me with Edwardo Cruz, the juicy pop star brother of Penelope Cruz. The two men hate each other because of an incident between me and Eugenia the Duchess of Montoro, whose mother is the Duchess of Alba who i use to hang with until she got into a knockout lesbiana sluggo with Paula Marzotto of the famed Italian fashion dynasty, and Paula's daughter Princess Beatrice Orromeo is now fooling around with studkin bullfighter Francisco Rivera who has a pretty little daughter named Cayetona whose mother is Eugenia----its all so complicated and confusing that i have trouble keeping track of it all, so i don't expect you to be able to. And did i mention that my good pal Lady Didi(Diana) Judd whose father is Visconte something or other is related to Prince Harry's girlfriend Chelsy Davy----let me end all this here and now.
I'm not known as a modern day Elsa Maxwell for nothing kids.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
RAMPART REPORT
My other Rice cousin Connie Rice, just published the controversial Rampart Report about the LA Police Department's relationship with the minority community, and in it she makes the same prediction that I've constantly warned---Namely that something big is about to burst that will make the LA Riots of '65 and '92 look like an English country garden party. Yes, when civil war in the USA happens, like every other trend, it will begin in Los Angeles. Beware and take heed.
***
On a sad note another pal of mine died recently. Tracy Thielan of Action Box Records and the quirky band Tracy and the Hindenburg Ground Crew. Tracy was 43 and overdosed. His band use to perform regularly at my old Club Sucker in Silverlake, Tracy's famous friends Viggo Mortensen and Quentin Tarantino would always come to support him. Tracy was a loveable burly queen with an eye for a young boy with a pretty face and plump package. He even got to suck off Viggo once.
***
Was at a mainstream bookstore the other day and started reading Scar Tissue, by Anthony Kiedes of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers. I'm the same age as Anthony and Flea, and we ran in the same circles so a lot of their memories of the 80s and 90's are also my memories. Fertile La Toyah Jackson even went to Fairyfax High School with them along with Timothy Hutten, Michele Green of LA Law fame and Bryon Allen (nee Foulks) I was surprised that while Anthony mentions Gary Allen in the book, he doesn't go into any of he and Flea's homo escapades, which were as numerous as their hetero adventures. Gary Allen for those of you who don't remember or weren't born yet, was this big, black faggot singer who was vaguely R&B new wave---very pleated pants/shoulder pads, and more or less was the sugar daddy and pimp of Flea who did a little bit of hustling in his youth. Flea has a notoriously large schlong that many a mansis coveted. Gary was featured in the same special issue of Interview Magazine that highlighted me and my Afro Sisters in the mid 1980s. The issue with Cindy Lauper on the cover, and the last one actually supervised by Andy Warhol himself.
***
i was recently clocked for my love affair with musician John Dragonetti of the band The Submarines. Why does everyone get into my sex business? If you all must know the details, let me set the record straight. Our thingy was more a slight fling, and now John is happy to be back with his true lady love Blake Hazard who incidentally is the great grandaughter of F. Scott Fitzgerald.
***
Yes, yes and more yes. I still occasionally hook up with the basketball player Vladimir Radmanovic. I call him my tall baby vampire. He looks a lot younger then his 25 years. Go ahead say it, I'm robbing the cradle AGAIN. The poor kid looked disapointed when i didn't get excited about his new contract with The Lakers, but what do i care about Sports.
My other Rice cousin Connie Rice, just published the controversial Rampart Report about the LA Police Department's relationship with the minority community, and in it she makes the same prediction that I've constantly warned---Namely that something big is about to burst that will make the LA Riots of '65 and '92 look like an English country garden party. Yes, when civil war in the USA happens, like every other trend, it will begin in Los Angeles. Beware and take heed.
***
On a sad note another pal of mine died recently. Tracy Thielan of Action Box Records and the quirky band Tracy and the Hindenburg Ground Crew. Tracy was 43 and overdosed. His band use to perform regularly at my old Club Sucker in Silverlake, Tracy's famous friends Viggo Mortensen and Quentin Tarantino would always come to support him. Tracy was a loveable burly queen with an eye for a young boy with a pretty face and plump package. He even got to suck off Viggo once.
***
Was at a mainstream bookstore the other day and started reading Scar Tissue, by Anthony Kiedes of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers. I'm the same age as Anthony and Flea, and we ran in the same circles so a lot of their memories of the 80s and 90's are also my memories. Fertile La Toyah Jackson even went to Fairyfax High School with them along with Timothy Hutten, Michele Green of LA Law fame and Bryon Allen (nee Foulks) I was surprised that while Anthony mentions Gary Allen in the book, he doesn't go into any of he and Flea's homo escapades, which were as numerous as their hetero adventures. Gary Allen for those of you who don't remember or weren't born yet, was this big, black faggot singer who was vaguely R&B new wave---very pleated pants/shoulder pads, and more or less was the sugar daddy and pimp of Flea who did a little bit of hustling in his youth. Flea has a notoriously large schlong that many a mansis coveted. Gary was featured in the same special issue of Interview Magazine that highlighted me and my Afro Sisters in the mid 1980s. The issue with Cindy Lauper on the cover, and the last one actually supervised by Andy Warhol himself.
***
i was recently clocked for my love affair with musician John Dragonetti of the band The Submarines. Why does everyone get into my sex business? If you all must know the details, let me set the record straight. Our thingy was more a slight fling, and now John is happy to be back with his true lady love Blake Hazard who incidentally is the great grandaughter of F. Scott Fitzgerald.
***
Yes, yes and more yes. I still occasionally hook up with the basketball player Vladimir Radmanovic. I call him my tall baby vampire. He looks a lot younger then his 25 years. Go ahead say it, I'm robbing the cradle AGAIN. The poor kid looked disapointed when i didn't get excited about his new contract with The Lakers, but what do i care about Sports.
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
HIGH BARBARY
One of my favorite golden era Hollywood stars died, June Allyson. She had one of the brightest, warmest smiles in tinseltown and a sexy husky voice. She wasn’t the best singer or dancer, but made up for it with that MGM charm. I loved her in the 1947 musical Good News opposite Peter Lawford, and Best Foot Forward(1943) with Lucille Ball, Nancy Walker and Gloria deHaven who she also starred with in Two Girls and a Sailor (1944) that featured sloppy holed faggots Van Johnson and Tom Drake. She was also known for being the remake queen of the mid 50s starring in remakes of It Happened One Night and The Women. One of her best dramatic films was a little known flicker called The Shrike (1955) co-starring Jose Ferrer, which I remember seeing on TV late at night in the mid 1970s. Ms. Allyson went against type and portrayed a harpy’s harpy. She was marvelous.
One of my favorite golden era Hollywood stars died, June Allyson. She had one of the brightest, warmest smiles in tinseltown and a sexy husky voice. She wasn’t the best singer or dancer, but made up for it with that MGM charm. I loved her in the 1947 musical Good News opposite Peter Lawford, and Best Foot Forward(1943) with Lucille Ball, Nancy Walker and Gloria deHaven who she also starred with in Two Girls and a Sailor (1944) that featured sloppy holed faggots Van Johnson and Tom Drake. She was also known for being the remake queen of the mid 50s starring in remakes of It Happened One Night and The Women. One of her best dramatic films was a little known flicker called The Shrike (1955) co-starring Jose Ferrer, which I remember seeing on TV late at night in the mid 1970s. Ms. Allyson went against type and portrayed a harpy’s harpy. She was marvelous.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
3D SUP BIN
One of my pals who has great taste in films and music, sent me these reviews of the new Richard Glatzer/Wash West film. I haven't seen the movie yet, but the premise of cultural tourism doesn't exactly exite me.
From Village Voice:
Wan and cutesy, Richard Glatzer and Wash Westmoreland's QUINCEAÑERA is most
notable for making explicit the slumming subtext of many an earnest Sundance
crowd-pleaser. Shot near the directors' own Echo Park residence and focused
largely on the neighborhood's Latino community (in particular a newly out,
tough gay boy and his possibly immaculately pregnant cousin), it's less
about culture-clash affirmation than gentrifiers' guilt. DENNIS LIM
From Film Comment:
Headline: And the Winner Isn't...
Sundance awards mediocrity while the standouts go home empty-handed
By Amy Taubin
Indifferently scripted, directed, acted, shot, and edited, Quinceanera is
less a film than a calling card for a Showtime series. A well-meaning,
cartoonish, though not satirical, comedy about gentrification, sexuality,
and multicultural relationships in the Los Angeles neighborhood of Echo
Park, Quinceanera pays lip service to political issues while sidestepping
any problem that could interfere with its feel-good ambiance. Thus
everyone's favorite uncle dies conveniently in his sleep so that we are
spared the sight of him being evicted by the upwardly mobile gay couple
who've bought the house and who've also recruited his hunky nephew for
threesomes. Similarly, a pregnant 16-year-old is reconciled with her dad
after it is medically proven that she's still a virgin. Heaven forbid the
A-word should be mentioned.
One of my pals who has great taste in films and music, sent me these reviews of the new Richard Glatzer/Wash West film. I haven't seen the movie yet, but the premise of cultural tourism doesn't exactly exite me.
From Village Voice:
Wan and cutesy, Richard Glatzer and Wash Westmoreland's QUINCEAÑERA is most
notable for making explicit the slumming subtext of many an earnest Sundance
crowd-pleaser. Shot near the directors' own Echo Park residence and focused
largely on the neighborhood's Latino community (in particular a newly out,
tough gay boy and his possibly immaculately pregnant cousin), it's less
about culture-clash affirmation than gentrifiers' guilt. DENNIS LIM
From Film Comment:
Headline: And the Winner Isn't...
Sundance awards mediocrity while the standouts go home empty-handed
By Amy Taubin
Indifferently scripted, directed, acted, shot, and edited, Quinceanera is
less a film than a calling card for a Showtime series. A well-meaning,
cartoonish, though not satirical, comedy about gentrification, sexuality,
and multicultural relationships in the Los Angeles neighborhood of Echo
Park, Quinceanera pays lip service to political issues while sidestepping
any problem that could interfere with its feel-good ambiance. Thus
everyone's favorite uncle dies conveniently in his sleep so that we are
spared the sight of him being evicted by the upwardly mobile gay couple
who've bought the house and who've also recruited his hunky nephew for
threesomes. Similarly, a pregnant 16-year-old is reconciled with her dad
after it is medically proven that she's still a virgin. Heaven forbid the
A-word should be mentioned.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
A SCANNER PORTLY PEPPERPOT
My gorgeous pal, the writer and global editrix Glenn Belverio pays homage to Hindi heartthrob Hrithik Roshan on A Shaded View on Fashion:
http://dianepernet.typepad.com/diane/2006/06/while_the_rest_.html
Mr. Roshan has become the Bollywood Superman, and speaking of Super Sperm-man I guess I should mention something about the films that I’ve seen in the last few months. I’m not really a film reviewer, sure I’m sent invites to private screenings and also videotape screeners. I do have a reputation as a tastemaker, and some people take all that so seriously, which of course I don’t. But since I enjoy getting all the delicious Star Jonesian swag, I’d better return the favour and write something.
First of all Superman Returns, directed by my former f*ck buddycan Miss Bryan Singer, one sloppy bottom who always forgets to douche. All that money$ involved and the flick is dullardsville. Loved Sings "Apt Pupil"
and The Usual Suspects. I also enjoyed his Mutant flickers as pure mindless entertainment, but this installation of Superman is only exciting when Marlon Brando’s image and voice is heard, and when your best performance is from someone who is dead, your movie is in trouble. Young beauty Brandon Routh has potential and otherworldly green screen matinee idol looks. They shouldn’t have photoshopped his bulge away, it would have given the proceedings some spark.
The Devil Wears Prada is bright and breezy. After seeing this film and Prairie Home Companion I now adore Meryl Streep. I use to hate her, and Miss Hathaway should star as a young Judy Garland in a film biopic. Considering this is a movie about fashion, Pat Fields clothes are all wrong-----way too cabaret-ish.
The brilliant British girl who plays the second assistant was the only character dressed appropriately.
And my horndoggedy pal Larry Clark scores high with Wassup Rockers. The main latin boyganza Jonathan Vasquez is mighty fine, ---a nice package in those stovepipe jeans, with a sizzlean musical score of south central punk bands.
I hate comedians and though I find him somewhat of an asphalt cutie, Adam Sandler is a deeply disturbed humanoid. His starring vehicle Click attests to that. It tries to be all sentimental at the end, but that is only masking some excrement that is beyond ill, something tells me that Mr. Sandler, like most comics is on the verge of committing suicide. Someone needs to intervene.
I love chunky Jack Black and really enjoyed Nacho Libre, which obviously he stole the idea from seeing one of Michele Carr of the Velvet Hammer’s Lucha VaVoom spectacles. Now Jack Black is what Adam Sandler wishes he was, but he’ll never be.
And did I mention how much I enjoyed the sexy Korean thriller Typhoon? The lead actors are two of the yummiest Asian men. How I’d like to munch on there fresh dugouts. That brings me to Lower City from Brazil’s Sergio Machada (Madame Sata) and the beautiful bodies of Alice Braga(Sonja’s niece) smoldering jubas Lazaro Ramos and lovesexy bubble butt Wagner Moura. And I cried when Antony sang in the Leonard Cohen docu-musical I’m Your Man.
At the airport I ran into an old dinge queen trick from the early 80s. The only reason I recognized him was that he still dresses the same. The man is British, wears big red framed Sally Jessy Raphael eye glasses and matching red canvas shoes. When I met him he was in his early 30s, skinny with male pattern baldness. He looked a little bit like Keith Haring crossed with a goofy Colin Firth. I wasn’t attracted to him, but he pursued me heavily which is always a turnon for me. He was actually cheating on his boyfriend with me. His lover was the TV actor Ernest Thomas who played Raj on the ABC black sitcom What’s Happening. He was always ragging on his lover, who he supported financially, and also his lover’s mother, who lived in South Central LA. I laughed out loud when I found out that Ernest Thomas was such a snippy snow and status queen that he refused to go south of Wilshire or east of LaBrea. At the terminal my former trick was giving me the hairy eyeball, but didn’t recognize me---thank god. He actually looks almost the same, just 25 years older.
On a sad note, John-John, aka Bush Bunny committed suicide by hanging himself in Griffith Park near one of John Rechy’s baby oiled leaves. Bush Bunny was named as such for the many times he was arrested for public sex in the parks of LA and Ventura County and was a mainstay of Ventura’s Wilde Planet crowd----Dora, Boofy St. Marie, Helen Bed of Retail Slut, Mrs. Jeff Burroughs and Mark Maxwell. Bush Bunny was also apart of the Amoeba Records and Filmworks collective that also included Keith Holland and Quasi O’Shea. My favorite memory of Bush was when he fell out of a tree in West Hollywood’s Blow Job Park performing fellatio on someone. He was always a happy-go-lucky hornpig, but the hardknock quality that is LA and the gay world finally proved to be his undoing.
My gorgeous pal, the writer and global editrix Glenn Belverio pays homage to Hindi heartthrob Hrithik Roshan on A Shaded View on Fashion:
http://dianepernet.typepad.com/diane/2006/06/while_the_rest_.html
Mr. Roshan has become the Bollywood Superman, and speaking of Super Sperm-man I guess I should mention something about the films that I’ve seen in the last few months. I’m not really a film reviewer, sure I’m sent invites to private screenings and also videotape screeners. I do have a reputation as a tastemaker, and some people take all that so seriously, which of course I don’t. But since I enjoy getting all the delicious Star Jonesian swag, I’d better return the favour and write something.
First of all Superman Returns, directed by my former f*ck buddycan Miss Bryan Singer, one sloppy bottom who always forgets to douche. All that money$ involved and the flick is dullardsville. Loved Sings "Apt Pupil"
and The Usual Suspects. I also enjoyed his Mutant flickers as pure mindless entertainment, but this installation of Superman is only exciting when Marlon Brando’s image and voice is heard, and when your best performance is from someone who is dead, your movie is in trouble. Young beauty Brandon Routh has potential and otherworldly green screen matinee idol looks. They shouldn’t have photoshopped his bulge away, it would have given the proceedings some spark.
The Devil Wears Prada is bright and breezy. After seeing this film and Prairie Home Companion I now adore Meryl Streep. I use to hate her, and Miss Hathaway should star as a young Judy Garland in a film biopic. Considering this is a movie about fashion, Pat Fields clothes are all wrong-----way too cabaret-ish.
The brilliant British girl who plays the second assistant was the only character dressed appropriately.
And my horndoggedy pal Larry Clark scores high with Wassup Rockers. The main latin boyganza Jonathan Vasquez is mighty fine, ---a nice package in those stovepipe jeans, with a sizzlean musical score of south central punk bands.
I hate comedians and though I find him somewhat of an asphalt cutie, Adam Sandler is a deeply disturbed humanoid. His starring vehicle Click attests to that. It tries to be all sentimental at the end, but that is only masking some excrement that is beyond ill, something tells me that Mr. Sandler, like most comics is on the verge of committing suicide. Someone needs to intervene.
I love chunky Jack Black and really enjoyed Nacho Libre, which obviously he stole the idea from seeing one of Michele Carr of the Velvet Hammer’s Lucha VaVoom spectacles. Now Jack Black is what Adam Sandler wishes he was, but he’ll never be.
And did I mention how much I enjoyed the sexy Korean thriller Typhoon? The lead actors are two of the yummiest Asian men. How I’d like to munch on there fresh dugouts. That brings me to Lower City from Brazil’s Sergio Machada (Madame Sata) and the beautiful bodies of Alice Braga(Sonja’s niece) smoldering jubas Lazaro Ramos and lovesexy bubble butt Wagner Moura. And I cried when Antony sang in the Leonard Cohen docu-musical I’m Your Man.
At the airport I ran into an old dinge queen trick from the early 80s. The only reason I recognized him was that he still dresses the same. The man is British, wears big red framed Sally Jessy Raphael eye glasses and matching red canvas shoes. When I met him he was in his early 30s, skinny with male pattern baldness. He looked a little bit like Keith Haring crossed with a goofy Colin Firth. I wasn’t attracted to him, but he pursued me heavily which is always a turnon for me. He was actually cheating on his boyfriend with me. His lover was the TV actor Ernest Thomas who played Raj on the ABC black sitcom What’s Happening. He was always ragging on his lover, who he supported financially, and also his lover’s mother, who lived in South Central LA. I laughed out loud when I found out that Ernest Thomas was such a snippy snow and status queen that he refused to go south of Wilshire or east of LaBrea. At the terminal my former trick was giving me the hairy eyeball, but didn’t recognize me---thank god. He actually looks almost the same, just 25 years older.
On a sad note, John-John, aka Bush Bunny committed suicide by hanging himself in Griffith Park near one of John Rechy’s baby oiled leaves. Bush Bunny was named as such for the many times he was arrested for public sex in the parks of LA and Ventura County and was a mainstay of Ventura’s Wilde Planet crowd----Dora, Boofy St. Marie, Helen Bed of Retail Slut, Mrs. Jeff Burroughs and Mark Maxwell. Bush Bunny was also apart of the Amoeba Records and Filmworks collective that also included Keith Holland and Quasi O’Shea. My favorite memory of Bush was when he fell out of a tree in West Hollywood’s Blow Job Park performing fellatio on someone. He was always a happy-go-lucky hornpig, but the hardknock quality that is LA and the gay world finally proved to be his undoing.
Monday, June 26, 2006
VALSEURS
For those of you who think that my blog is complete fantasy, which seems absurd in that I write things that aren’t exactly flattering to myself, remember that truth is stranger then fiction. And yes I REALLY do get emails sent to me or my assistant for TV and movie roles. Below is a copy of one:
-----Original Message-----
From: Suzanne Broderick
Sent: Fri, 2 Jun 2006 17:01:28 -0700
Subject: Vaginal Davis
Hi,
I'm the casting director for "Breaking Up With Shannen Doherty" - a new show for the Oxygen network - and I'd like to speak with you about the possibility of Vaginal Davis appearing in a segment of our show. The show will be taped in Los Angeles on June 14. Please call me at (323) 436-0124 so I can give you more information about the show. Thanks.
Best regards,
Suzanne Broderick
***
And this email came from Canadian auteur Bruce La Bruce, who is a good friend of mine. I’ve performed in two of his films and he acted in one of mine. Some people out in cyberland don’t believe that I’m a real person, and that I’m a figment of the imagination of my webmaster Larry Bob. These internet techies did their computer finagling and traced my web page to Larry Bob’s web page. Well the reason why they are connected is that my webpage piggy backs on his. So that alone brings them to the brilliant deduction that I don’t exist.
Oh welpsis, here is Bruce’s emug:
DEAR DOCTOR DAVIS: Well you know will munro and lyn mcneil now run this cute
club the Beaver, and it would be absolutely perfect for bricktops, Ontario. But please consult with me as well so that I can try to be in town for at least part of your runs. What's new, pussy?
I struggle with life and death in this foul, fallow world.
Hey, I was thinking, what ever happened to lisa suckdog? And also, what was the name of those two hillbillies(Psychodrama) who used to pull shit out of their asses and work glory holes on stage and then chase people out of the club with handfuls of shit and down the street? They kept one of their members in a pig pen, if I recall, in the Ozarks. That was back when the world was simpler. I'm going
mondo new york from july 6 to 12. Gonna visit glenn belverio and lend immoral support for his book events. Also he and I are guess djing at Miss Shapes. Also they
are displaying J.D.s at the Visionaire gallery in a show. You should have
FLTJ there.
rick castro’s hollywood gallery Antebellum should be called Auntie Bellum?
I also have a photograph in a show at PS 1. Big whoop. One stinkin' photograph. I
loathe art. I just wrote a manifesto for the manifesto issue of C Magazine.
I'll include it below.
I'm writing the intro for the Butt book. How cum you
haven't been in Butt? Do you want me to pitch you? I think they're kind of
dragophobic. But you could do it as Buster Boote. Did you hear about Kevin
AuAviance getting hate crimed in the east village? My favourite part was
that they said he wasn't in drag, but that he was wearing something like a
feather boa and tight vinyl Daisy Dukes. If it walks like a duck in drag...
I'm so evil. But you already know that. Did you ever read the faux obituary
I wrote about Kevin AuCoin? I think I only showed it to slava. I don't know
what made me do it. It was so mean. But it's black humour, you know. I mean,
I only met him once, and he was a bit rude to me, but that's not why I did
it. I just corrupted his real obit in the ny times. His last book was called
Face Forward, and I said that it was being changed posthumously to Face
Down. Sometimes I just have a little tourette's devil in me. It's very
Sibyl. Oh well. I'll probably be dead soon too, and then people can write
nasty obits about me. Mr. LaBruce never married. Did you see my article
about the Che lawsuit in BlackBook? I reprinted it and the unedited version
on my Myspace blog (www.myspace.com/brucelabruce). Why aren't you in
myspace. All the kids are doing it. Ok delovely, I gotta dego. Keep Movin'.
Xxx blab P.s. We've got to do Ulrike's Brain on stage in Berlin and you
have to play Angela Davis in it. I've been doing research, like watching the
Brain That Wouldn't Die and They Saved Hitler's Brain and listening to They
Saved Hitler's Cock and re-watching Guerilla: The Taking of Patty Hearst and
State of Seige, which is so great and prescient. Susanne will play the head
of Ulrike Meinhoff, but Hitler's head will also make an appearance. I was
thinking of asking Daniel to help me write a libretto and make it into an
opera. Or an operetta. Or a rock opera. It would be so much funny.
***
The Purple Resistance Army (a.k.a., the PRA), and it¹s auxiliary wing,
the Purple Menace Society (PMS: women¹s division) is a united and federated
grouping of members of different races and genders and socialistic political
parties of the oppressed people of The United States of Canada and America,
who have, under homosexual and minority leadership, formed and joined The
Purple Federated Republic (PFR) and have agreed to struggle together on
behalf of all their people and races and sexes and political parties'
interests in the gaining of Freedom and Self Determination and Independence
for all faggots and others. The PRA declares revolutionary war against the
Fascist Capitalist and Largely Heterosexual Class and all its agents of
murder, oppression and exploitation. We support by force of Limp Wrists the
just struggles of all oppressed fairies for self-determination and
independence and hereby offer to all sexual liberation movements,
revolutionary workers¹ groups, and people¹s organizations our Total Aid(s)
and support for the struggle for freedom and justice for all people and
races and genders!
On behalf of all its constituents and affiliates and various sissy
sycophants, the PRA hereby identifies and extrapolates upon the following
pop cultural positions that should be followed in order to activate and
actuate the aforementioned principles in an opportunistic and propitious
fashion. Attention must be paid to the following edicts in order to gain
membership to the Purple Resistance Army. Failure to adhere to the general
principles delineated herewith may result in humiliation, teasing, taunting,
in-house gay bashing, cuckolding, cold-shouldering, and a general reading to
filth of the individual in question.
1) Never Trust Anyone Under 30. A reversal (see: Counterintuitivity) of the
old proverb from a previous generation that exhorts fellow comrades never to
trust anyone over the age of 30, this neo-axiom of the PRA is designed both
as an historical broadside against the age-ism that has become endemic to
society since the advent of the industrial revolution, and as a reminder
that, under the new world order, tender youth, a formerly fairly reliable
bellwether of rebellion, anti-authoritarianism, and non-conformist
behaviour, has long since lost its counter-cultural compass and can no
longer be trusted or relied upon to instigate or disseminate revolutionary
ideals a priori. Although it may be misinterpreted as an encouraging sign
that voter turnout in the eighteen to twenty-five year age demographic has
dwindled in the past several decades in western democracies, it is by no
means a dependable indication that the youth of today is anything less than
a vast, empty cadre of reactionary, close-minded clones who will swallow any
sort of predigested pablum that is placed in front of them, including, but
not restricted to, badly realized computer-generated images (see also: The
Aesthetic Dementia), political doublespeak, marriage (including, sadly, the
gay kind), commercial pandering, substandard reality television, corporate
hip hop, pre-fabricated celebrities, hyper-violent video games, respect of
property and copyright, and other untold forms of popular prestidigitation.
The current Œyouth revolt¹ in France, wherein young people are fighting for
the right to gain permanent job security (whilst in their twenties! See
also: Revolutionary Reactionaries) is a far cry from the events of May ¹68
in which a popular uprising of French people from diverse ethnic, cultural,
class, and age groups, including communist and anarchist factions, roused to
action by a continuing trend of western imperialist adventurism in Southeast
Asia, sought to challenge the very control of the ruling classes by
espousing ultra left wing causes, including educational and social reform
and the advocacy of sexual freedom and free love.
2) Get To Know Your Asshole. The Purple Resistance Army entreats all males,
but particularly the self-proclaimed ³heterosexuals² (also known as
³breeders², although this term may now apply occasionally to ³homosexuals²
See once again: Revolutionary Reactionaries) to get in touch with their
assholes, by any means necessary. Marcuse might have had something like this
in mind when he talked about the surplus repression imposed on its people by
an ³affluent society.² In an industrialized society which has reached a
point of abundance that is characterized by the production of ³unproductive
goods² tech gadgets, excess waste, planned obsolescence, luxury items,
excessive military build-up, etc. a certain repression over and above the
one necessary to advance culture is forced on its citizens in order to exert
a particular notion of ³normalcy² that is more aligned with conformist
social and institutional attitudes rather than ideas of individual
fulfillment. The redundant, unnecessary work upon which advanced capitalism
is predicated, characterized by a deadening or stupefying effect a kind of
zombie state when performed by the working or middle class subject, or, in
the case of the white collar workers, by a moral indifference and callous
aggressiveness results in a distraction from their own personal and sexual
needs. A person who functions normally in such a sick society is himself
sick, while it is only the ³nonadjusted² individual who can achieve a
healthy acting out against the overly strict restraints and demands of the
dominant culture. It is such a society that prevents constitutionally
bisexual men from exploring their homosexuality, and in particular, from
getting to know their assholes. Many men can spend their entire lives not
experiencing the pleasure of the anus, when it has been well documented that
it is the very location of the male G-spot and thereby invaluable for
healthy orgasmic release. Neglect of this region leads to poor prostate
health, general irritability, spiritual malaise, or worse. A carefully
placed finger or fingers up the ass of any one of a number of members of the
Bush or Harper administrations would greatly reduce expenditures on the
military and Star Wars technology, curtail the doctrine of preemptive
aggression against oil-rich, Middle East nations (most of whose leaders are
already well acquainted with their own assholes and those of their Gulf
Coast neighbours), and a whole host of other bellicose, morally
insupportable policies based on surplus repression and anal indifference.
Members of the PRA are encouraged to help any adult male over the age of
consent to explore and befriend his own asshole so that others do not have
to suffer as a consequence. Anal Liberation Now!
3) Discourse Sucks! Although it may fly in the face of conventional wisdom
concerning the predisposition of homosexuals to the appreciation of art and
artistic practice (See: Counterintuitivity), the Purple Resistance Army does
not in general support or condone artists or, in particular, art discourse,
although bullshit artists and their discourses are provisionally accepted.
The art world has become a purely reactive and reactionary institution whose
trends and tendencies are determined and circumscribed by the broader
conservative cultural forces and socio-economic policies of an exploitative
capitalist ruling class, having long since foregone its function as a
vanguard or avant-garde, or as serving a therapeutic, cathartic, or even
critical function, let alone a political or revolutionary one. Devised by a
laissez-faire haute bourgeoisie, art discourse, an Emperor dressed in what
he believes are the most au current designer clothes, gets lost in the
elaborate, solipsistic layers of his own nakedness, lording his
self-importance over an unwitting and uncomprehending public whose idea of
art is the fruit in a slot machine. Modern trends in art include escapist
folk fantasies involving psilocybin unicorns and golden-tressed maidens with
dirty feet locked in pornographic carnal embrace, a new twist on a purely
decorative seventies throwback that reinvigorates questionable commodity
fetishism. More conceptual, ³dialogic² art, including the use of readymades
or relational art practice, while less commoditizable than traditional art
objects, is nonetheless reified and marketed by the same hierarchical
economic institutions and international exhibition superstructures that
confine it to the amusement of an insider elite. As an alternative to the
art orthodoxy, the PRA promotes finger painting, free range graffiti,
tattooing (although not on pigs), home movies, ad hoc shrines or, for
conceptualists, practical jokes, pranks, hoaxes, and public nudity not
organized and sanctioned by institutionalized art stars.
4) Counterintuitivity. The Purple Resistance Army, a militant band of
insurgent sissies, must not succumb to the current cycle of cynicism and
apathy that has infiltrated and destroyed the spirit of resistance,
subversion and highly civil disobedience that was once at the very core of
the homosexual psyche. In today¹s topsy-turvy, wrong is right,
revolutionarily reactionary world, the members of the PRA must learn to use
counterintuitivity to fight its enemies. The dictates of common sense are no
longer to be trusted in this poisoned environment.
5) Death to Celebrity! Celebrity culture has become the biggest boondoggle
of the modern world, and members of the PRA must do everything in their
power to destroy it. Much of the blame for the rise of celebrity culture has
been laid at the dainty feet of Andy Warhol (peace and blessings be upon
him), whose famous phrase ³In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen
minutes² has been wildly misinterpreted as an endorsement of celebrity for
all as a kind of democratic principle in a capitalist context. His real
prediction for the future was probably more along the lines of an Orwellian
(or perhaps Kafkaesque) dystopic nightmare in which each individual in
society is forced, by means of an assembly line or factory model, into a
limited window of fame/labour precisely fifteen minutes in duration, none
more significant or important than the next, each turned out like so many
car parts and discarded when it has outworn its usefulness. This is the same
model Warhol used to produce his early movies and art work: objects
assembled by a series of poorly paid workers and manufactured in his
³Factory², mass-produced and sold in a free market economy. (Although Warhol
was, himself, an artist, celebrity, and capitalist nonpareil, the Purple
Resistance Army grants him enormous leeway for his overwhelming contribution
to hypersensitive, tortured sissyhood.) Today, the worship of celebrity has
become a kind of neurotic compulsion that turns otherwise salient and
reasonable human beings into slavering, sycophantic boobs who care more
about the excruciating minutiae of the lifestyles of the filthy rich and
unjustly famous than about their own, infinitely more authentic, everyday
lives. Celebrity itself has become a disease that mangles and maims the egos
of those who suffer it, reducing them to delusional paranoiacs who should be
at the very least, not paid very much attention to, at best, deprogrammed.
Down with Overexposure! Up with Anonymity!
6) Show Business is Politics/Politics is Show Business. Awards shows receive
their own special category of condemnation from the PRA for their smug
self-congratulatoriness and crass commercialism, propping up, as they do,
the celebrity infrastructure by lording the wealth and power of the
privileged few over the increasingly impoverished, debt-ridden anonymous
masses. There are now more award shows and presentations than there are
categories to define them, each one a cleverly contrived and predetermined
spectacle designed by the various industries who manufactures it to present
the illusion of democratic process and free market competition. The Oscars
have become the Holy Grail or golden calf of the entertainment industry,
an award conferring on its recipient both increased status and bargaining
power as commoditized icon. (Not to put too fine a point on it, but the free
gift bags handed out to celebrities at such awards are worth considerably
more than the yearly income of the average Canmerican family.) Celebrities
now campaign for major awards like seasoned (read: corrupt) politicians,
hiring teams of strategists and publicists to promote their cause, while
politicians, an increasing number of them crossing over from the
entertainment field, are styled and cosmetically sold to the public like
programmatic B-list movie stars. The PRA holds special contempt and
condemnation for George Clooney, a liberal star posturing as the rebel
dissenter. Recently accepting his Oscar, Clooney eschewed any overt
political statement while his country is bogged down in an unjust war - in
favour of professing his proud support and admiration for ³The Academy², the
ultimate Hollywood establishment organ that controls the film industry in
the elitist and cabalistic, hierarchical style of Freemasonry. Gone are the
days of the likes of Vanessa Redgrave (peace and blessings be upon her),
who, while accepting her supporting Oscar in 1977 for playing a Jewish
freedom fighter during the Nazi occupation, gave a shout out to the
Palestine Liberation Organization. Even the most overtly Œpolitical¹ stars
today remain inside players who perpetuate the corrupt, nepotistic
plutocracy that is Hollywood by not only showing up to every conceivable
promotional event, but also actively campaigning for awards and accolades.
The PRA strongly encourages homosexuals to challenge their faggoty
predilection for organizing and participating in any and all parades,
festivals, pageants, and ceremonies that support and promote corporate
enterprise. Death to the Hollywood insect who preys upon the life of the
people!
7) The Tyranny of Stylists/The Aesthetic Dementia. Modern styling has become
particularly offensive to the PRA and the PMS, especially considering that
it¹s an invisible fifth column of our tragically misguided misogynistic
homosexual brothers, from stylists to designers, who have dictated and
enforced the grotesque style imperatives that now govern the image of women
in the western world. From the unimaginative, uniform blond frosted tips and
streaks, to the blow-up sex doll collagen-injected lips and over-inflated
fake bosoms, to the grotesquely immobilized Botoxed faces and plastic
surgery disasters, a new model army of faux lap-dancers have willingly
conformed to the style of the hyper-objectified woman, thereby capitulating
to the male gaze in a way that might previously have only occurred in the
worst nightmares of Laura Mulvey. (Cruelly, the advent of high definition
media technology only serves to exaggerate and intensify the monstrosity of
these highly engineered viral vixens on television and, to a lesser degree,
in the movies.) The PRA and its affiliates always encourage personal style
and individualism over tiresome trends, particularly when those trends
encourage women to approximate the image of female porn stars and strippers
who are themselves already a distorted and hideous manifestation of the
female image as conceived by the exploitative, male-dominated adult fantasy
industry. Autonomous and/or amateur sex trade workers with personal flair
and a feminist sensibility are, of course, welcome members of the PRA.
Although there are too many to enumerate, two other areas of modern
aesthetic dementia have been singled out for formal castigation by the PRA.
Firstly, the advent of digital effects and CGI is a particular effrontery to
the delicate sensibilities of our lavender membership. Even a technology in
its infancy should not be responsible for this much garish, crude, and
meretricious imagery. The perpetrators of CGI also have the dubious
distinction of removing all the visceral stimulation and sense of adventure
from the popular media. Nothing can replace the excitement, in the glory
days of analogue, of a vacant model or actor being forced to share the same
temporal space as a man-eating feline or a predatory bird eager to pluck out
his or her eye. The manufacturing (i.e., faking) of high-risk stunts
digitally deprives the audience of its most precious form of entertainment:
the potential evisceration and/or termination of overpaid, privileged, and
totally expendable celebrities. Secondly, the PRA calls out the exhausted
kingdom of hip hop for its negative contribution to fashion and style. From
its ostentatious signifiers of ³bling² ridiculously enormous gold dollar
signs slung around slouched necks; tacky, overstated jewelry and
accessories; pimped out, gas-guzzling showboat cars to its propensity to
engage in stylistic excess, infantilism, conspicuous consumption, and rank
gangsterism, the hip hop and rap contingent has taken nouveau riche
posturing to new levels of banality. Compare this to the sleek and elegant,
militant quasi-Marxist style of Angela Davis and the Black Panthers from the
era of true black revolution and you may be inspired to burn, baby, burn
your Fiddy Cent and The Game CDs and paraphernalia. (Incidentally, no
conscientious PRA member should buy CDs, hip hop or otherwise: free
downloading from the internet not only challenges the corrupt profiteering
of monopolistic music conglomerates and the enforcement of overly strict
copyright practices, but it also reduces the use of plastic and other
non-biodegradable materials unnecessarily used in the packaging of
entertainment products. File sharing is not only true democracy in action,
but it¹s also environmentally friendly! And remember, intellectual property
is theft!
8) Club Pamela Anderson. By Club Pamela Anderson, the PRA is not referring
to an organization represented by or supporting the over-hyped star. It
means club her, like a baby seal. From her recent appearance on the Comedy
Network as the subject of a celebrity roast (with Courtney ³Doll Parts²
Love, by her side Kurt Cobain must be permanently spinning in his grave),
to her hostessing gig at the underwhelming Juno Awards, which presented
the sad spectacle of Canada¹s rad indie rockers salivating over her enormous
pair of commodities (see: Never Trust Anyone Under 30), Anderson represents
pretty much everything that is wrong with western free market capitalism.
She needs to be, if not regulated, garrotted.
9) The Charm Offensive. Counterintuitively, PRA members must always be kind,
courteous, and polite. The fact that the world is going to hell in a Kate
Spade handbag is no excuse for rudeness.
10) Down with Revolutionary Reactionaries. A relatively recent
phenomenon, the term revolutionary reactionaries refers to formerly radical
groups of disenfranchised minorities and/or oppressed peoples who are now
fighting, sometimes violently, for the right to be conservative, stable, and
inert. From the aforementioned French riots, during which so-called
socialist youths donned balaclavas and sacked the libraries of the Sorbonne
(the very site of the genesis of May ¹68!) to promote their fight for
sedentary, entrenched job security; to angry gays and lesbians struggling to
participate in marriage - a traditional social and legal institution
designed to bind and control its citizens - and to adopt family values; to
black thug rappers transforming hip hop, a previously unruly and subversive
form of spontaneous, rebellious street communication, into a corporate
enterprise characterized by good old-fashioned corruption, greed, and
internecine violence (Proof RIP!): the oppressed are doing a pretty good
job of oppressing themselves these days without the help of hegemonic
states, bureaucracies and institutions. The Purple Resistance Army urgently
implores you to Wake Up and Smell the Tear Gas!
Bruce LaBruce for the Purple Resistance Army
For those of you who think that my blog is complete fantasy, which seems absurd in that I write things that aren’t exactly flattering to myself, remember that truth is stranger then fiction. And yes I REALLY do get emails sent to me or my assistant for TV and movie roles. Below is a copy of one:
-----Original Message-----
From: Suzanne Broderick
Sent: Fri, 2 Jun 2006 17:01:28 -0700
Subject: Vaginal Davis
Hi,
I'm the casting director for "Breaking Up With Shannen Doherty" - a new show for the Oxygen network - and I'd like to speak with you about the possibility of Vaginal Davis appearing in a segment of our show. The show will be taped in Los Angeles on June 14. Please call me at (323) 436-0124 so I can give you more information about the show. Thanks.
Best regards,
Suzanne Broderick
***
And this email came from Canadian auteur Bruce La Bruce, who is a good friend of mine. I’ve performed in two of his films and he acted in one of mine. Some people out in cyberland don’t believe that I’m a real person, and that I’m a figment of the imagination of my webmaster Larry Bob. These internet techies did their computer finagling and traced my web page to Larry Bob’s web page. Well the reason why they are connected is that my webpage piggy backs on his. So that alone brings them to the brilliant deduction that I don’t exist.
Oh welpsis, here is Bruce’s emug:
DEAR DOCTOR DAVIS: Well you know will munro and lyn mcneil now run this cute
club the Beaver, and it would be absolutely perfect for bricktops, Ontario. But please consult with me as well so that I can try to be in town for at least part of your runs. What's new, pussy?
I struggle with life and death in this foul, fallow world.
Hey, I was thinking, what ever happened to lisa suckdog? And also, what was the name of those two hillbillies(Psychodrama) who used to pull shit out of their asses and work glory holes on stage and then chase people out of the club with handfuls of shit and down the street? They kept one of their members in a pig pen, if I recall, in the Ozarks. That was back when the world was simpler. I'm going
mondo new york from july 6 to 12. Gonna visit glenn belverio and lend immoral support for his book events. Also he and I are guess djing at Miss Shapes. Also they
are displaying J.D.s at the Visionaire gallery in a show. You should have
FLTJ there.
rick castro’s hollywood gallery Antebellum should be called Auntie Bellum?
I also have a photograph in a show at PS 1. Big whoop. One stinkin' photograph. I
loathe art. I just wrote a manifesto for the manifesto issue of C Magazine.
I'll include it below.
I'm writing the intro for the Butt book. How cum you
haven't been in Butt? Do you want me to pitch you? I think they're kind of
dragophobic. But you could do it as Buster Boote. Did you hear about Kevin
AuAviance getting hate crimed in the east village? My favourite part was
that they said he wasn't in drag, but that he was wearing something like a
feather boa and tight vinyl Daisy Dukes. If it walks like a duck in drag...
I'm so evil. But you already know that. Did you ever read the faux obituary
I wrote about Kevin AuCoin? I think I only showed it to slava. I don't know
what made me do it. It was so mean. But it's black humour, you know. I mean,
I only met him once, and he was a bit rude to me, but that's not why I did
it. I just corrupted his real obit in the ny times. His last book was called
Face Forward, and I said that it was being changed posthumously to Face
Down. Sometimes I just have a little tourette's devil in me. It's very
Sibyl. Oh well. I'll probably be dead soon too, and then people can write
nasty obits about me. Mr. LaBruce never married. Did you see my article
about the Che lawsuit in BlackBook? I reprinted it and the unedited version
on my Myspace blog (www.myspace.com/brucelabruce). Why aren't you in
myspace. All the kids are doing it. Ok delovely, I gotta dego. Keep Movin'.
Xxx blab P.s. We've got to do Ulrike's Brain on stage in Berlin and you
have to play Angela Davis in it. I've been doing research, like watching the
Brain That Wouldn't Die and They Saved Hitler's Brain and listening to They
Saved Hitler's Cock and re-watching Guerilla: The Taking of Patty Hearst and
State of Seige, which is so great and prescient. Susanne will play the head
of Ulrike Meinhoff, but Hitler's head will also make an appearance. I was
thinking of asking Daniel to help me write a libretto and make it into an
opera. Or an operetta. Or a rock opera. It would be so much funny.
***
The Purple Resistance Army (a.k.a., the PRA), and it¹s auxiliary wing,
the Purple Menace Society (PMS: women¹s division) is a united and federated
grouping of members of different races and genders and socialistic political
parties of the oppressed people of The United States of Canada and America,
who have, under homosexual and minority leadership, formed and joined The
Purple Federated Republic (PFR) and have agreed to struggle together on
behalf of all their people and races and sexes and political parties'
interests in the gaining of Freedom and Self Determination and Independence
for all faggots and others. The PRA declares revolutionary war against the
Fascist Capitalist and Largely Heterosexual Class and all its agents of
murder, oppression and exploitation. We support by force of Limp Wrists the
just struggles of all oppressed fairies for self-determination and
independence and hereby offer to all sexual liberation movements,
revolutionary workers¹ groups, and people¹s organizations our Total Aid(s)
and support for the struggle for freedom and justice for all people and
races and genders!
On behalf of all its constituents and affiliates and various sissy
sycophants, the PRA hereby identifies and extrapolates upon the following
pop cultural positions that should be followed in order to activate and
actuate the aforementioned principles in an opportunistic and propitious
fashion. Attention must be paid to the following edicts in order to gain
membership to the Purple Resistance Army. Failure to adhere to the general
principles delineated herewith may result in humiliation, teasing, taunting,
in-house gay bashing, cuckolding, cold-shouldering, and a general reading to
filth of the individual in question.
1) Never Trust Anyone Under 30. A reversal (see: Counterintuitivity) of the
old proverb from a previous generation that exhorts fellow comrades never to
trust anyone over the age of 30, this neo-axiom of the PRA is designed both
as an historical broadside against the age-ism that has become endemic to
society since the advent of the industrial revolution, and as a reminder
that, under the new world order, tender youth, a formerly fairly reliable
bellwether of rebellion, anti-authoritarianism, and non-conformist
behaviour, has long since lost its counter-cultural compass and can no
longer be trusted or relied upon to instigate or disseminate revolutionary
ideals a priori. Although it may be misinterpreted as an encouraging sign
that voter turnout in the eighteen to twenty-five year age demographic has
dwindled in the past several decades in western democracies, it is by no
means a dependable indication that the youth of today is anything less than
a vast, empty cadre of reactionary, close-minded clones who will swallow any
sort of predigested pablum that is placed in front of them, including, but
not restricted to, badly realized computer-generated images (see also: The
Aesthetic Dementia), political doublespeak, marriage (including, sadly, the
gay kind), commercial pandering, substandard reality television, corporate
hip hop, pre-fabricated celebrities, hyper-violent video games, respect of
property and copyright, and other untold forms of popular prestidigitation.
The current Œyouth revolt¹ in France, wherein young people are fighting for
the right to gain permanent job security (whilst in their twenties! See
also: Revolutionary Reactionaries) is a far cry from the events of May ¹68
in which a popular uprising of French people from diverse ethnic, cultural,
class, and age groups, including communist and anarchist factions, roused to
action by a continuing trend of western imperialist adventurism in Southeast
Asia, sought to challenge the very control of the ruling classes by
espousing ultra left wing causes, including educational and social reform
and the advocacy of sexual freedom and free love.
2) Get To Know Your Asshole. The Purple Resistance Army entreats all males,
but particularly the self-proclaimed ³heterosexuals² (also known as
³breeders², although this term may now apply occasionally to ³homosexuals²
See once again: Revolutionary Reactionaries) to get in touch with their
assholes, by any means necessary. Marcuse might have had something like this
in mind when he talked about the surplus repression imposed on its people by
an ³affluent society.² In an industrialized society which has reached a
point of abundance that is characterized by the production of ³unproductive
goods² tech gadgets, excess waste, planned obsolescence, luxury items,
excessive military build-up, etc. a certain repression over and above the
one necessary to advance culture is forced on its citizens in order to exert
a particular notion of ³normalcy² that is more aligned with conformist
social and institutional attitudes rather than ideas of individual
fulfillment. The redundant, unnecessary work upon which advanced capitalism
is predicated, characterized by a deadening or stupefying effect a kind of
zombie state when performed by the working or middle class subject, or, in
the case of the white collar workers, by a moral indifference and callous
aggressiveness results in a distraction from their own personal and sexual
needs. A person who functions normally in such a sick society is himself
sick, while it is only the ³nonadjusted² individual who can achieve a
healthy acting out against the overly strict restraints and demands of the
dominant culture. It is such a society that prevents constitutionally
bisexual men from exploring their homosexuality, and in particular, from
getting to know their assholes. Many men can spend their entire lives not
experiencing the pleasure of the anus, when it has been well documented that
it is the very location of the male G-spot and thereby invaluable for
healthy orgasmic release. Neglect of this region leads to poor prostate
health, general irritability, spiritual malaise, or worse. A carefully
placed finger or fingers up the ass of any one of a number of members of the
Bush or Harper administrations would greatly reduce expenditures on the
military and Star Wars technology, curtail the doctrine of preemptive
aggression against oil-rich, Middle East nations (most of whose leaders are
already well acquainted with their own assholes and those of their Gulf
Coast neighbours), and a whole host of other bellicose, morally
insupportable policies based on surplus repression and anal indifference.
Members of the PRA are encouraged to help any adult male over the age of
consent to explore and befriend his own asshole so that others do not have
to suffer as a consequence. Anal Liberation Now!
3) Discourse Sucks! Although it may fly in the face of conventional wisdom
concerning the predisposition of homosexuals to the appreciation of art and
artistic practice (See: Counterintuitivity), the Purple Resistance Army does
not in general support or condone artists or, in particular, art discourse,
although bullshit artists and their discourses are provisionally accepted.
The art world has become a purely reactive and reactionary institution whose
trends and tendencies are determined and circumscribed by the broader
conservative cultural forces and socio-economic policies of an exploitative
capitalist ruling class, having long since foregone its function as a
vanguard or avant-garde, or as serving a therapeutic, cathartic, or even
critical function, let alone a political or revolutionary one. Devised by a
laissez-faire haute bourgeoisie, art discourse, an Emperor dressed in what
he believes are the most au current designer clothes, gets lost in the
elaborate, solipsistic layers of his own nakedness, lording his
self-importance over an unwitting and uncomprehending public whose idea of
art is the fruit in a slot machine. Modern trends in art include escapist
folk fantasies involving psilocybin unicorns and golden-tressed maidens with
dirty feet locked in pornographic carnal embrace, a new twist on a purely
decorative seventies throwback that reinvigorates questionable commodity
fetishism. More conceptual, ³dialogic² art, including the use of readymades
or relational art practice, while less commoditizable than traditional art
objects, is nonetheless reified and marketed by the same hierarchical
economic institutions and international exhibition superstructures that
confine it to the amusement of an insider elite. As an alternative to the
art orthodoxy, the PRA promotes finger painting, free range graffiti,
tattooing (although not on pigs), home movies, ad hoc shrines or, for
conceptualists, practical jokes, pranks, hoaxes, and public nudity not
organized and sanctioned by institutionalized art stars.
4) Counterintuitivity. The Purple Resistance Army, a militant band of
insurgent sissies, must not succumb to the current cycle of cynicism and
apathy that has infiltrated and destroyed the spirit of resistance,
subversion and highly civil disobedience that was once at the very core of
the homosexual psyche. In today¹s topsy-turvy, wrong is right,
revolutionarily reactionary world, the members of the PRA must learn to use
counterintuitivity to fight its enemies. The dictates of common sense are no
longer to be trusted in this poisoned environment.
5) Death to Celebrity! Celebrity culture has become the biggest boondoggle
of the modern world, and members of the PRA must do everything in their
power to destroy it. Much of the blame for the rise of celebrity culture has
been laid at the dainty feet of Andy Warhol (peace and blessings be upon
him), whose famous phrase ³In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen
minutes² has been wildly misinterpreted as an endorsement of celebrity for
all as a kind of democratic principle in a capitalist context. His real
prediction for the future was probably more along the lines of an Orwellian
(or perhaps Kafkaesque) dystopic nightmare in which each individual in
society is forced, by means of an assembly line or factory model, into a
limited window of fame/labour precisely fifteen minutes in duration, none
more significant or important than the next, each turned out like so many
car parts and discarded when it has outworn its usefulness. This is the same
model Warhol used to produce his early movies and art work: objects
assembled by a series of poorly paid workers and manufactured in his
³Factory², mass-produced and sold in a free market economy. (Although Warhol
was, himself, an artist, celebrity, and capitalist nonpareil, the Purple
Resistance Army grants him enormous leeway for his overwhelming contribution
to hypersensitive, tortured sissyhood.) Today, the worship of celebrity has
become a kind of neurotic compulsion that turns otherwise salient and
reasonable human beings into slavering, sycophantic boobs who care more
about the excruciating minutiae of the lifestyles of the filthy rich and
unjustly famous than about their own, infinitely more authentic, everyday
lives. Celebrity itself has become a disease that mangles and maims the egos
of those who suffer it, reducing them to delusional paranoiacs who should be
at the very least, not paid very much attention to, at best, deprogrammed.
Down with Overexposure! Up with Anonymity!
6) Show Business is Politics/Politics is Show Business. Awards shows receive
their own special category of condemnation from the PRA for their smug
self-congratulatoriness and crass commercialism, propping up, as they do,
the celebrity infrastructure by lording the wealth and power of the
privileged few over the increasingly impoverished, debt-ridden anonymous
masses. There are now more award shows and presentations than there are
categories to define them, each one a cleverly contrived and predetermined
spectacle designed by the various industries who manufactures it to present
the illusion of democratic process and free market competition. The Oscars
have become the Holy Grail or golden calf of the entertainment industry,
an award conferring on its recipient both increased status and bargaining
power as commoditized icon. (Not to put too fine a point on it, but the free
gift bags handed out to celebrities at such awards are worth considerably
more than the yearly income of the average Canmerican family.) Celebrities
now campaign for major awards like seasoned (read: corrupt) politicians,
hiring teams of strategists and publicists to promote their cause, while
politicians, an increasing number of them crossing over from the
entertainment field, are styled and cosmetically sold to the public like
programmatic B-list movie stars. The PRA holds special contempt and
condemnation for George Clooney, a liberal star posturing as the rebel
dissenter. Recently accepting his Oscar, Clooney eschewed any overt
political statement while his country is bogged down in an unjust war - in
favour of professing his proud support and admiration for ³The Academy², the
ultimate Hollywood establishment organ that controls the film industry in
the elitist and cabalistic, hierarchical style of Freemasonry. Gone are the
days of the likes of Vanessa Redgrave (peace and blessings be upon her),
who, while accepting her supporting Oscar in 1977 for playing a Jewish
freedom fighter during the Nazi occupation, gave a shout out to the
Palestine Liberation Organization. Even the most overtly Œpolitical¹ stars
today remain inside players who perpetuate the corrupt, nepotistic
plutocracy that is Hollywood by not only showing up to every conceivable
promotional event, but also actively campaigning for awards and accolades.
The PRA strongly encourages homosexuals to challenge their faggoty
predilection for organizing and participating in any and all parades,
festivals, pageants, and ceremonies that support and promote corporate
enterprise. Death to the Hollywood insect who preys upon the life of the
people!
7) The Tyranny of Stylists/The Aesthetic Dementia. Modern styling has become
particularly offensive to the PRA and the PMS, especially considering that
it¹s an invisible fifth column of our tragically misguided misogynistic
homosexual brothers, from stylists to designers, who have dictated and
enforced the grotesque style imperatives that now govern the image of women
in the western world. From the unimaginative, uniform blond frosted tips and
streaks, to the blow-up sex doll collagen-injected lips and over-inflated
fake bosoms, to the grotesquely immobilized Botoxed faces and plastic
surgery disasters, a new model army of faux lap-dancers have willingly
conformed to the style of the hyper-objectified woman, thereby capitulating
to the male gaze in a way that might previously have only occurred in the
worst nightmares of Laura Mulvey. (Cruelly, the advent of high definition
media technology only serves to exaggerate and intensify the monstrosity of
these highly engineered viral vixens on television and, to a lesser degree,
in the movies.) The PRA and its affiliates always encourage personal style
and individualism over tiresome trends, particularly when those trends
encourage women to approximate the image of female porn stars and strippers
who are themselves already a distorted and hideous manifestation of the
female image as conceived by the exploitative, male-dominated adult fantasy
industry. Autonomous and/or amateur sex trade workers with personal flair
and a feminist sensibility are, of course, welcome members of the PRA.
Although there are too many to enumerate, two other areas of modern
aesthetic dementia have been singled out for formal castigation by the PRA.
Firstly, the advent of digital effects and CGI is a particular effrontery to
the delicate sensibilities of our lavender membership. Even a technology in
its infancy should not be responsible for this much garish, crude, and
meretricious imagery. The perpetrators of CGI also have the dubious
distinction of removing all the visceral stimulation and sense of adventure
from the popular media. Nothing can replace the excitement, in the glory
days of analogue, of a vacant model or actor being forced to share the same
temporal space as a man-eating feline or a predatory bird eager to pluck out
his or her eye. The manufacturing (i.e., faking) of high-risk stunts
digitally deprives the audience of its most precious form of entertainment:
the potential evisceration and/or termination of overpaid, privileged, and
totally expendable celebrities. Secondly, the PRA calls out the exhausted
kingdom of hip hop for its negative contribution to fashion and style. From
its ostentatious signifiers of ³bling² ridiculously enormous gold dollar
signs slung around slouched necks; tacky, overstated jewelry and
accessories; pimped out, gas-guzzling showboat cars to its propensity to
engage in stylistic excess, infantilism, conspicuous consumption, and rank
gangsterism, the hip hop and rap contingent has taken nouveau riche
posturing to new levels of banality. Compare this to the sleek and elegant,
militant quasi-Marxist style of Angela Davis and the Black Panthers from the
era of true black revolution and you may be inspired to burn, baby, burn
your Fiddy Cent and The Game CDs and paraphernalia. (Incidentally, no
conscientious PRA member should buy CDs, hip hop or otherwise: free
downloading from the internet not only challenges the corrupt profiteering
of monopolistic music conglomerates and the enforcement of overly strict
copyright practices, but it also reduces the use of plastic and other
non-biodegradable materials unnecessarily used in the packaging of
entertainment products. File sharing is not only true democracy in action,
but it¹s also environmentally friendly! And remember, intellectual property
is theft!
8) Club Pamela Anderson. By Club Pamela Anderson, the PRA is not referring
to an organization represented by or supporting the over-hyped star. It
means club her, like a baby seal. From her recent appearance on the Comedy
Network as the subject of a celebrity roast (with Courtney ³Doll Parts²
Love, by her side Kurt Cobain must be permanently spinning in his grave),
to her hostessing gig at the underwhelming Juno Awards, which presented
the sad spectacle of Canada¹s rad indie rockers salivating over her enormous
pair of commodities (see: Never Trust Anyone Under 30), Anderson represents
pretty much everything that is wrong with western free market capitalism.
She needs to be, if not regulated, garrotted.
9) The Charm Offensive. Counterintuitively, PRA members must always be kind,
courteous, and polite. The fact that the world is going to hell in a Kate
Spade handbag is no excuse for rudeness.
10) Down with Revolutionary Reactionaries. A relatively recent
phenomenon, the term revolutionary reactionaries refers to formerly radical
groups of disenfranchised minorities and/or oppressed peoples who are now
fighting, sometimes violently, for the right to be conservative, stable, and
inert. From the aforementioned French riots, during which so-called
socialist youths donned balaclavas and sacked the libraries of the Sorbonne
(the very site of the genesis of May ¹68!) to promote their fight for
sedentary, entrenched job security; to angry gays and lesbians struggling to
participate in marriage - a traditional social and legal institution
designed to bind and control its citizens - and to adopt family values; to
black thug rappers transforming hip hop, a previously unruly and subversive
form of spontaneous, rebellious street communication, into a corporate
enterprise characterized by good old-fashioned corruption, greed, and
internecine violence (Proof RIP!): the oppressed are doing a pretty good
job of oppressing themselves these days without the help of hegemonic
states, bureaucracies and institutions. The Purple Resistance Army urgently
implores you to Wake Up and Smell the Tear Gas!
Bruce LaBruce for the Purple Resistance Army