CORRECCIONES
Oops as usual i made a big mistaka in my drunken reportage from Thursday evening. The Peres Projects, Berlin opening was for Asian Punk Boy aka Terrence Koh. For some reason i thought "Slava" Mogutin was performing, but actually Terrence Koh was performing a lovely ritualistic butoh cocaine freebasing whirly burly boy-boy show featuring some very tiny, almost pre-dimunitive, but muscular and washboard ab-eled art players. it was a virtual art world cornacopia with a heavy accent on the copia with everyone who is anyone grifting the art world in attendance. Nice seeing british Fred and his moula posse. That Fred knows how to bank coin. Also little Dean Shashima and Melena of Los Super Elegantes among the dazzling hoite poloi. Congrats to sweet Javier and the beautiful, luscious Andrea for pulling off such a major tour de force and exciting partycus that Berlin really needs.
My escort for the evening Sasha of Heartcore Records and the Cheap Collective made oggle at all the booty pies and later Shasha and i had a nite cap at Barbie Deinhoff where a sweet little Olympia Washington boy dj´s an eccletic mix of tunes.

NAZIS RAUS: AUS DEN KOPTEN
My screenings at the Arsenal-Sony Center was incredible. Fantastic, enthusiastic cute crowd. The movies, looked amazing on the big big silver screen. A few glitches but nothing major. Koen Claerhaut the sizzling young Belgian couturier designed a de-constructed gown for me that was luxuriant, sophisticated and beguiling. Everyone loved the dress and it fit me to a proverbial Ta-Tina!!! Susanne, the star of Bruce la bruce´s raspberry reich beat my face so that i looked as pretty as she is. Ruth who edited my berlin stories after 4 years of sitting in a can, did a masterful job. Ruth works with laurie anderson, and is such a major major talent, it was great having her represent at the screening along with the rest of the cheap crew including Daniela who played piano while Wo Ist Manfred? screened.
Kitty Diggens and my daughter Michele Hell Carr of the Velvet Hammer are both in town and will be performing with me at the closing night party of the festival, Poker im Osten, which will be my last performance here in berlin, tomorrow-sunday. Monday is the national holiday of reunification so the city will most likely be sleeping.
Special thanks to Stephanie, Oishi and the gang at the Arsenal for inviting me, and taking me out to a late nite dinner afterwards and for the lovely wine reception. They treated me like a goddess. The celebs in attendance were Wilheim and Annetta, Berlin´s number one art couple, jurgen bruning, the producer of bruce la bruce´s movies, franke potente, and a bunch of famous journalists,cultural & art critics.

AUSSTELLUNG SHARPIES
2nite is the opening of the peres projects gallery in berlin. cute little javier told me he was going to have an annex to his la gallery in germany, but i would have never guessed that it would open so soon. Yuroslav Mogutin, the hot russian artist and star of Bruce la Bruce´s Skin Flick aka Gang of Four Skins, will be doing a super love sexy performance at the opening. i can´t wait to go, it should be a major event and should show these germans how to get down and party and not stand around looking glum and depressed, which is what i´ve been seeing a lot. Things have certainly changed since i last was here in berlin for a long time back in 2001. i guess globalization is to blame for the lack of sexy energy in the streets, highways and byways.
One thing i have to say is there are some ill looks and hairdo´s worn by these Germans. Their techno, rave damage is just atrocious. That love parade look is way too tired. yuk. the other day at a bar i saw this boy with an ill palm springs orange tan, curly mullet and acid wash, and i don´t think he was trying to be ironic. the poor thing was actually going for a sexy cum hither look, but was only pulling off cum dither or cum phylis diller.----yikes! the gay world in berlin is super gay. its like they took everything gay in the states, put it in a blender and tripled it to the fourth extreme times 177,000. its sooo gay its really depressing. i can´t even find anything amusing about it for a good old fashioned vaginal davis chuckle. if i move here i will definately have to create my own scene, and i believe they are ripe for it. well haven´t i always had to create my own scene no matter where i´ve been?
Got an email from some guy named Jared who says he is the new owner of the Funeral Parlour, and that he is interested in my doing Bricktops there. If things couldn´t get more by love bizarre. i also noticed that Lenny Young of Lenny and Squiggy fame, the former owner, also sent me an email, but of course i erased it without reading what it said. What a strange development this is. This Jared is supposed to be the manager of Jones and Bar Marmont. Is he running the new space for Sean McPhearson? What exactly is going on here. Are they going to change the place into a yuppie palace? This Jared guy says its going to stay funky, buy funky does he mean like the good luck bar? is that his standard of funky cold medina? If anyone out there in cyberland has any thoughts on the subject please email me. i´m trying to check emails everyday at the internet cafe while here in berlin. for some strange reason, aol won´t come up on my friends computers because their machines are too old, so i´m forced to go to a cafe and spend euros. oh welpsis. i finally found a new cafe around the corner from my apartment that i like and its pretty cheap.

hopefully today i will go with Sasha to see Slava´s Wigger show at the Deschler Galerie. Slave put on this show of his photography and the drawings of some very young kid named Brian Kenny. i also have to meet with ruth, the film editor to see if she was able to finish editing my berlin stories experimental shorts that i made four years ago. i´m hoping to premiere all of these made in berlin movies at my screening at the arsenal Friday, so please tell all your intercontinental balistic pals. At the closing party of the poker im osten festival i´ll premiere my new band The Ruth Fischers, which is bound to blow Franz Ferdinand out of the water.

COMMUNISTA MOUTH
Had a blast at the Hau 2, where Cheap was dj-ing. Hung out most of the evening with the pretty girl who programs The Arsenal, where i will be having my screening on friday. She just got back from vacation in new york and toronto. she and i both don´t care for babies, pets, cooking and cars, but not necessarily in that order.
Tuesday Sasha took me to dinner on the Casting Allee which he calls the trendy street, and that is a good name for it. After supper it was drinks at the Morgenrot, a vegan cafe, bar and kollektiv, with macrobiotic cocktails-----i kid you not. the tired barmaid was smoking a joint and it took forever for her to make our pina coladas, but when we eventually got them, they were delicious. Sasha is so sweet. He is mixed Bosnian, Croatian, Serbian and Montenegrian. Wow! how is that for a pedigree.

BERLIN MARATHONIA
o my, the berlin marathon re-routed my tram line on the premiere day for it happened to me, making the lady late for make-up and hair. The premiere was a smash hit. it all came together bringing me fond memories of cheap jewelry 5 years ago. The hard part was doing 3 shows in a row. the piece is only 20 minutes, but the energy it takes to generate my performance really leaves me drained. it happened to me leaves the audience a bit disoriented. it was hard to read the crowd for the first two performances, we are coming at them so strong and relentless. The moving stage is fantastic, but it took a while to get use to performing on it. Special kudos go to make-up and hair designer Andreas, who works for Thierry Mugler and does a lot of the Paris shows. Andreas and his assistant Steffi gave us that tight look that put this piece over the top. when you look that good, you really dont have to do anything else. the set design and lighting by cecile and fred rocked. Who knows maybe this piece will be resurrected somewhere else, there has already been some sniffing around by Tokyo, Sidney, Oz and Montreal. The after party at the Hau 2 was a delight as well. I premiered my VD as VB installation and the kids looked so good as living, breathing statues. Kisses to the beautiful Lisa Marie, handsome Jurgen, delicious NaNa and sweet & cuddly Andrea who helped me so much 5 years ago at the Podevil and Praeter. Also shouts to DJ Ipek of Salon Oriental, and the incredible Rhythm Kings. Also got to meet the sexy and tasty Barbara Panther, the 1st daughter of the Black Panthers. She is a goddesa. I got so drunk at the after party hanging out with cutie pie Ruth, Annetta, Wilheim and making out with Sasha from Heartcore Records. That boy is an insatiable flirt. I´ve known him since he was 16, now he´s going to grad school.
Treated myself to a nice message therapy session. boy did i need it. feel very relaxed and spiritualista. Got to see all the hunky berlin marathon runners. Were they running away from my all too needy love?