THE WEEK THAT TWAS

My gallery sent me to Vansterdam, in yet another attempt of finishing the editing process on my Berlin Stories. I filmed the material in 2001 when I was living in East Berlin for six months. I’ve been slowly putting it together when my Canadian reps fly me up. They hooked me with free editing time from this big healthy, cornfed boy, who actually does all the technical work, meaning he pushes all the buttons and does exactly what I tell him to.
I just say, "I want it to look like this, and he makes it happen." This kid is about 26 and works on boring mainstream movies and TV as his dayjob, so the chance to collaborate with a great artist on personal films is a treat for him. He doesn’t realize that he’s my eye candy treat. His radiant youth and uber masculine beauty is simply dazzling. He’s my favorite type of humpy white boy, one who doesn’t know how good looking he is. After spending such intimate time with him its difficult coming back to Los Ang. Boys here in my hometown are too self aware, and that always ruins it, at least for this little tiny lady.

Dadster took me to lunch at Café Des Artiste. Eric Estrada was sitting across from us. He looks good for a middle aged, dimunitive Mexican man. He really puts the double "D" in dimunitive. He’s got to be 4 foot nothing. LA Weekly Books Editor Debbie Vankin was also having lunch at Des Artiste. She was with a woman from Distributed Art Publishers. Deb wrote the great cover pull-out on Koreatown that the Bleekers recently released. I was one of the first people to talk and write about the gem that is K-Town, and this was way back in the 80s with my zine Fertile LaToyah Jackson. The lady from DAP gave Ron and I their latest catalogue to pick out new releases that we may want to review. I really stuffed myself at lucheon. Everytime someone treats me to a meal, I act like its going to be my last. One never knows----it just might.

Later that evening Lenny the young Elder and Andrew of Gould escorted me to the Disney Hall Redcat Theatre to see Atrid Hadad and Los Tarzanes. I’ve seen her now about four or five times, and she’s magnificent. Those ill costumes, and that incredible voice. I love how she wears these giant hoop skirts that expertly camaflouge her turnip shape. Her face and eyes are really expressive,framed with that gorgeous long black Lebanon hair.

Ron brought the great actor and living beauty legend Juan Fernandez and his dancer/beau Tad Coughenour to the show. I simply adore Juan and Tad. I’m responsible for them meeting at one of my !Cholita! shows. I can always matchmake everybody but myself.

Did my regular rehearsal for Bricktops with Mr. Uncertain. I came up with a new song for my opening and it goes like this:

Oh Pretty George Dubya Shrub
Rub a Dub Dub
The war president
His boyfriend is war

He’s Mr. Madame Death
he lives for death
so kiss him and smell that thelemic
Halle Berry-tosis Breath

Later at the studio I watched this screener I was given for Barbershop 2 starring Ice Cube, Queen Latifah, Cedric The Entertainer and Jane Fonda’s hot young son Troy Garity reprising his wigger role from the first movie. Most Hollywood sequals are dreadfull, but this one at least tried, so I have to give it some credit. I loved how they used the gentrification angle. Of course the best parts are the "dozens" antics and cutting up that is a real part of an urban Barbershop experience. My mother use to take me to those kind of Barbers to get my Quo Vadis haircut back in the 60s and 70s. I really find Ice Cube sexy for a chunky black man. I adore his moles below the right eye that form a perfect triangle.

My former Club Sucker partner, Frank Rodriguez took me to eat at this delish pupuseria on Pico and Vermont. We then checked out some dive bars around that area as a possible location for our annual birthday soiree. The bars either had bad lighting or only served beer and wine. All our friends and acquaintances are hard liquor drinkers. We stopped by Shatto 39 Lanes Bowling alley on Vermont near third to check the bar there and the lighting was just dreadful. They did have a coffeeshop connected, but the art director in me, just couldn’t get around that bad lighting. I guess we’ll settle on having the party at MJ’s (formerly Woody’s Hyperion) the redesign of the place is a bit precious, but its close by and they have a dancefloor. We’ve never had dancing at our yearly shindig.

Bricktops Friday was pussy tearing. Mr Uncertains jazz combo Uncertain have come in to their own. The addition of a stand up bass player who is Scandanavian, and is like a young Mr. Paganini just sent shivers down my timber spine. When I asked Mr. Un where he found his new band member he told me that he was at a late nite taco stand in tired West LA and there was this group of kids who were all wearing amazing outfits, which he relayed is unusual in and of itself on the Westside, [I second that emotion]so he introduced himself to them, and asked if they knew of a good bass player, and this set the crooked wheels in motion for his find.

The evenings theme was UnValentine and no one is more unValen then actress Constance Bennett. Lord Andrew of Gould found some really good pictures of her for my threshold collage. It was lovely seeing the Ditty Bops back. I want to have them perform as a residency at Bricktops. They are just sooooo good, with incredible energy. LA legendary club DJ/impressario Henry Peck came with Howie Pyro of D Generation and Danzig fame and one of the cities treasures: Tra La La aka: Mrs. AIDS Nurse Debbie Trent who brought her handsome son Colin---I remember when he was a baby, and now he’s 21. Boy, you know you’re old when your punk rocker friends all have grown children. Also out making the scene: Norman Ghoulsen of The Acres, Gloria Vanderbilt’s TV journalista son Anderson Cooper who was scamming on all the young collegiate looking boys, cutey pie choreographer/director Jean Spinosa who had a pre-Bricktops tea party and brought a gaggle of juicy pals, La Poubelle Twins, Don and Augusta, designer extroidinaire Shauna Leone wearing an amazing vintage 20s dress, Shauna is one of the new breed of kids on the scene with amazing style and lots of pizazz. She was helping Europa with her broken hearts Jewelry boutique in the foyer. Oh and guest DJ Prickle was fantastic. He actually got people dancing early in the evening.

ALMANACHA ACROSA THE PONDA

This lovely note from Marcu in Berlin, at the premiere of Bruce La Bruce?s new movie Raspberry Reich at the Berlin Film Festival:

Miss D,

I've wanted to write for such a long time now. I think about you so often. We talk about you so often. and I regularly read your great BLOG (and so do certain unnammed slimy theater people here, which has
caused much turmoil in my Berlin life--but, whatever. It's all for the good, my dear, all for the good.)
I don't really have the time to write anything as wonderful as you deserve, but just wanted to send a quick note telling you that the Berlin premiere of Bruce's film was spectacular! An enormous cinema
was packed with over 1600 people, including scores sitting on the stairs! Ivan, from CHEAP JEWELRY fame, or Dragan, the name we now call him, said the event was so exciting, as to be unexpected on
sterile Potsdamer Platz; it was more like the thrilling film premieres in Serbia. She should know. La Bruce and La Sachsse looked smashing in their premiere duds. BLAB in a shiny grey suit, complemented by a deep red shirt, an LA tan, and ever-present tinted glasses. Susanne in a blue velvet and taffeta forties dress, which
along with her Jean Seberg short black hair lent her a classic fashionable darling of our times look. The audience often cheered along with the hilarious script and people gathered in an exciting drug-like induced craze in the lounge afterwards, as BLAB was whisked away for a long television interview. Of course, the predictable
kinds of people left the film after a while and other predictable kinds of people who stayed had predictably boring responses. But so many others rose beautifully to the challenge of the film! And we'll see how the wider humorless German public and German press deals with it. I find it inspiring, refreshing--but then again, I'm just some
pesky foreign Jew faggot here, and we know from experience how the Germans have previously reacted to people like me. So let's see how they deal with The Raspberry Reich!will write more later--I'm off to the States on Friday for an important interview, then I'm back in Berlin toward the end of Feb.i hope you're doing well. by the way did herb alpert ever give you the money and prize you so deserve? It was great that you were
nominated, but they should come through with the goods.all my love and happy Vaginal Davis Day
yours, marcu thursday is a big filmmaker magazine party for raspberry reich (and john greyson, todd verow and michael brynntrup). our own daniela ramona will be spinning tunes, so you could be sure we'll be dancing to PME!

MAISIE ON WEST KNOLL

Became a cultural tourist on Saturday night and went to a gay cocktail party at my friend Twee?s in West Hollywood. Twee aka: Michael Dykes is a lovely man I met through Bill Silva and the Margaret Cho tour.
Got to see pics of Twee?s new Brazillian boyfriend, who is 19, and the most amazing, studly beauty that has ever walked on gods green hued planet. Twee deserves hot love, and amazing sex. He really is a dear.

There wasn?t anyone at this party that I found particularly interesting, but it is sometimes a joy to get out of one?s element and be in an environment where you?re completely anonymous. I loved the masculine French bartender, who made some potent libations, and there was this juicy young Russian boy with a fine meaty ass and bouncy titties.

GRAMMYSTICAL

Talk about doing something I?ve never done before. I decided to walk around the corner to the BMG Grammy party at the Avalon(formerly The Palace) At first I didn?t want to go, because I didn't have a date, and thought it would be boring, but I?m too poor to turn down free food and liquor, so I put on my Puma jogging suit and decided to try and act rapperly. The party was somewhat dull.
All the media thought I was either Dennis Rodman or Q-Tip from A Tribe Called Quest. Do I resemble them?

As usual in a party situation, I don?t mingle, I just sit in one place and hold court. Surprisingly people were flocking to me. I felt like I was being hit on by Justin Timberlake, Prince, Sharon Stone, Dave Grohl of the Foo Fighters, Ellen DeGeneres, Christina Aguilera and both Jack and Meg White of the Stripes. Celebrities sure are nice to you, when you are indifferent to them. I was also invited to the Outcast Mansion party, which I had no way of getting to since I don?t drive, but it was almost 2pm and I was tipsy, so i quietly slid out of the soiree and staggered back home down Hollywood Blvd. I hadn't been to a Grammy party since the late 1970s at one held at the Biltmore, downtown that had a disco room(crowded), and a new wave/punk room(empty) that the GoGo's performed in. Chuck Berry stuck his tongue down my throat at that party, and he did it to several other girls and guys. At the time i was still a teenager, so it was really shocking to find out first hand about the bisexuality of a rock legend.

THE CONFORMIST

Saw the new Bernardo Bertoluci film "The Dreamers" Wow!!!!! Talk about effective! Nice willis action by that young actor Michael Pitt. He has quite the appendage, plus some major booty and tit to go with his luscious lipps Inc. Of course I preferred the gallic boy Louise Garrel, who has a cashew, but a firm melon rump, that I sure wouldn?t kick out of the sackles.