BEAUTY IS AS BEAUTY DOES

Francesco Scavullo, the famed Cosmo photographer died at age 82. He took my picture back in the 80s and said that I was one of the most beautiful women in the world.

RICKI LAKE DEBACLE

I always get a few emails a month asking me to be on some TV talk show or audition for a sitcom. I always turn it down. The lastest is from a producer of the Ricki Lake Show. I loved Ricki when she was chubby and the star of Hairspray and in several other John Waters movies. Last time I was at Fertile LaToyah Jackson’s house she was watching Ricki’s talk show and I was surprised at how much weight the girl has lost. She was very sexy fat, but doesn’t radiate the same quality thin. She’s still charming and sweet natured, but like Divine her big size made her unique and special. I don’t know what this has to do with anything but I just decided I’d mention it.

PLAY DULCIMER

a recent instant message dialogue with my good east coast pal:

deribicus: Hello Ms. Davis
VAGDAVIS: oh pretty one/perfect one. i love you
deribicus: And I you!
VAGDAVIS: i had such a nice time with you last friday. and all the bricktops kids adore you. you looked so good in your spiffy outfit.
Mr. Uncertain and Co. Really put on a show eh?
deribicus: Oh that crowd is one of the best you have drawn ever, so Fresh Faced! But sadly I did not wear that raccoon coat home to NYC as a trophy, as I dared hope. And I love your new song re: Strom Thurman and Uma Thurman.
VAGDAVIS: did you talk to Mr. Raccoon coat, who was he?
deribicus: I did talk to him, didn't get so much bio, he's from Long Beach went to Poly High (same as Snoop plus Cameron Diaz) and came w/ the girl w/ the right on blue dress and the dyke who looked like a boy driver---she was great
VAGDAVIS: I love people who are creative dressers.
deribicus: early 20th century clothing lends itself to much intrigue, esp. for the ladies.
VAGDAVIS: Can't wait till Bruce La Bruce is in town
deribicus: Who is the one chap you do know, he is kind of little and he had on a black trench coat and the de rigeur cap?
VAGDAVIS: Oh that was Dax, he's the gay boyfriend of Charity Hope Valentine. He and Charity sometimes have sex with each other. These young kids are wonderfully pansexual .
deribicus: Oh I love those who can take pansexuality out of theory and into practice! Dr. Richard Wang asked: Did Ms. Davis look like Queen Latifah in the movie Chicago? I said: sorta!
VAGDAVIS: now who is this Dr. Wang?
deribicus: he is the inventor of www.blairmag.com, that nutty ezine I wrote for w/ the Carol Channing tribute, the Gay or Eurotrash game, etc. He's this kooky, girly Chinese fag, and he's also an actual medical doctor! you met him here one time. but you meet everyone!
VAGDAVIS: found a new Bricktops discovery this cute girl group called the Ditty Bops. amazing harmonies—just signed to Warner Bros. gotta run. have a million emails to return. love you miss you already kiss kiss bang bang
deribicus: To you, all my love!! see you soon.

FOR WHAT CAME YE INTO THE WILDERNESS?

Received a lovely letter and packet from Renton Durelle. Its his ritual four times a year. Ren must be at least 22 or 23 now. He’s going to graduate school at Cornell, and is one of the most dear and sincere young men I’ve ever met. He’s also a striking beauty, tall, uber masculine and direct. His family is one of the most powerful in these United States of God’s America country.

He was one of my students when I taught for a stint at Deep Springs College, the utopian school in the high desert on the border between Nevada and California. The students pick the professors, and I was one of the hand chosen few. It was such a priveledge. My good friend the extroidinary writer Bruce Benderson, taught there, and he must have told the kids about me, though I’ve never had that confirmed.

Deep Springs is a two year liberal arts campus with 25 students-all strapping boys in their radiant youth, the school occupies a 120 square mile cattle ranch. Lucien Nunn founded the school in 1917 as a refuge from the distractions of traditional campus life. The school credo is based on three pillars: labor, academics and self-government. The boys are allowed to develop an instinctive understanding of democratic principles and the need to serve society. The schools principles of unselfish service in uplifting mankind from materialism to idealism really dotted all my proverbial I’s. There aren’t any TV’s, computers, or phones, not because they are against them, its just that they don’t get good reception so its not worth having them.

And I’ve never been in such a natural homosexually inclined environment, where the boys give each other pleasure in a matter-of-fact, unaffected way, courting each other with a spirit of true brotherhood, love and affection. No mealy mouthed, shrill, faggoty, histrionics.

I wish I had known about Deep Springs when I had graduated from high school, one thousand years ago.

Young Ren will be in Los Angeles in the Spring and I can’t wait to see him again. Did i mention that he also has a HUGE penis?

ADELPHIA MI ET CURET

Oh i had forgotten to write about my day of drinking with Jeffreyland Hilbert at the Spotlight Pub a few weeks ago. I adore Jeffreyland. He is originally from Idaho, and i think that his not being from LA gives him an outsiders take of Los Angeles that is spot on and righteous. I've never known a white boy to be so black in his take on the world. Jeffreyland is a rebel at heart, and is the ultimate seeker of truth.
I was relaying to Jeffreyland how big Daddy Athey was telling me that this is the year that i need to have a nice little relationship with someone. It doesn't have to be the love of my life, it can be very temporary, but he thinks that i need that.
Jeff concurred, but also agreed with me when i said that when i see these gay boi couples running around town, i don't see any great passion between them. They just seem like nice school chums.

SCENTED WITH BERGAMONT

My favorite couple Skot Armstrong and James Tallon, the driving forces behind the Science Holiday art collective and Museum of Fun galleries threw an old fashion high HIGH tea party at the Regal Biltmore Hotel Sunday afternoon. It was a perfect day to gather at this historic hotel’s Rendevous Court. My escort was Matthew Phillip an Aussie journalist and contributing editor to Blue Magazine who now lives in New York with his sweet and delicious beau Michael and works for the Village Voice under Richard Goldstein.

The most important wo-man in Los Angeles Bibbe Hansen with her young, well hung, jailbait husband, Sean Carrillo rounded out the party. A fine time was had by all. I’ve never laughed so much and the tea service was purely enchanting. I choose the "champagne of tea-- Darjeeling , which is very light almost "high yeller" in color with a savagely delicate muscatel flavour and flowerette bouquet. Of course I made a pure piglet of myself almost choking on the smoke salmon and dill butter on country bread sandwiches. I didn’t eat that many of the "dainties", but I couldn’t resist the scones with Devonshire cream. Skot and James are so generous and showered me with what seemed like a million presents. All things I really need-----I swear that besides being sexy they are both clairvoyant.

ALMANACH DE GOTHA

Bricktops’ George White Scandals nite was just that ---an unadulturated scandale!!!!! The Fishnet Floozy’s performed and as usual tore up! The Floozys are good time gals, very sweet with a nice raunchy, fun loving crowd.

Mr. Uncertain sang a new song that really kicked. So many notables in the crowd that
I don’t know where to begin.

Kitty Diggens, the czarina of Burlesque from Portland, Oregon was celebrating her birthday in the boydello lounge. Prickle was the guest DJ and he played some amazing tunes----all records, no CD’s.

Pirate Jenny then took over behind the wheels of steel and was spinning like a wild woman. Pirate Jenny aka: Professor Jennifer Doyle hosted a lovely New Year’s day brunch that featured all of the most acclaimed artists and
academics, with memosa’s and delicious edibles.

Getting back to Bricky’s. A BBC documentarian came and was filming for a special on the LA Club Scene. I also got to meet cute Matthew an Aussie journalist now living in New York with his sexy boyfriend Michael. Matthew is working for the Village Voice and also is a main contributor to the Aussie mag Blue.

Rebecca Del Rio of Mulholland Drive fame was enchanting wearing all Chanel. Her best accessory was a very young Jewish boy from Chicago with the fullest lips who gave me a kiss that warmed my cold black heart. Bibbe Hansen and her husband Sean Carrillo were radiant dancing up a storm with Dame Darcy, Nora of the Centimeters, Creekbird, the Velvet Rope’s Lisa Derrick, Gwen Kahn, Shauna Leone, Miss Morgan Olsen and the deliriously sexy Poubelle Twins.

Gorgeous Daniel Bruhl of Wolfgang Petersen’s german hit Good Bye, Lenin! Complimented my DJ skills and Victor Rasuk (Raising Victor Vargas) was chatting away in Spanish with our humpy bar back Rubencito. I was also introduced to the French director Nicolas Philibert(Etre et Avoir) who will be in Los Ang for two weeks and said he will come back this Friday, because he wants to meet Bruce La Bruce.

CAHIERS DU CINE’MA

When I was in Paris two years ago I saw this movie Secret Things by Jean-Claude Brisseau. I loved it. Now its playing here at the Nuart Theatre in tired West LA for one week only and I had to see it again, though riding the bus all the way to the westside isn’t my idea of a frolic filled time.

Ate a delicious meal around the corner at LuLu’s. LuLu’s use to be just a coffee shop if I remember correctly, but now they are a full menu café, famous for their fried twinkies(yuk). The girl who served me was very personable and attentive, not what I’m use to from people in this part of town.

Getting back to the movie---its audacious and stars two striking french lasses Coralie Revel and Sabrina Seyvecou and an arrogant chunk of a man played by Fabrice Deville. I’m not going to tell you anything about it, just recommend that you see it.

GOLDEN STREAMS

Rick Van Santen died. Rick was one of the owners of Goldenvoice, who have the monopoly on punk rock promotion in Los Angeles. He also started the Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival in Indio that has become very popular and critically acclaimed. I remember when Rick sold t-shirts for the Screamers. He use to be somewhat cute, but the last time I remember seeing him was when I opened up for Siouxie and the Banshees at the Hollywood Paladium, and he was fat, bald and middle aged looking. I didn’t recognize him, and we are exactly the same age. There was a time when he had a crush on me, but my drag persona was just too overwhelming for him. I wonder if Wiley will take his place in the firm?